Just Breathe Series (Trilogy Box Set)

by Martha Sweeney

  “What?” I reply.

  “That’s a great idea, honey,” Henry says.

  “Yeah, why not?” Nathan chimes in. “We’ll be there for the middle of January for the show, so why don’t we go out a little earlier. We can spend some of the holiday with Joe and his family if they don’t mind taking on a large group like us and you can see Mr. and Mrs. Nelson, the girls and Martin and Celia.”

  “That’s a great idea,” Nǎinai comments. “I’ve never been to New York and I’d love to meet your family.”

  “It would be great for Nathan and the rest of the family who haven’t to see snow for the first time,” Maggie encourages.

  “Snow!” Jade shouts. “I want to play in it.”

  “I can talk to Joe’s parents about their recommendations on renting a few lofts instead of dealing with hotel rooms,” Henry offers. “It would be better and easier. Besides, most hotels will be booked up by now.”

  I agree to the suggestion only because I really would like to go back and see the Nelson’s and the girls — the house I can deal with after the new year. It takes a little coaxing to get Mŭqīn to agree, but the restaurant has been self-winding since Henry has been able to assist Maggie with getting Mŭqīn and Fŭqīn to understand the benefits of owning and having someone else run the place. They actually promoted Kevin to restaurant manager and he’s been doing a wonderful job since he started a few weeks ago.

  Later in the evening as most of the family sits quietly, comatose from overeating, Nǎinai joins me as Jade sleeps in my lap and Sadie rests at my feet. “I am so very proud of you, Emma,” she commends. “You have grown so much since your trip home.”

  “This is my home,” I playfully tease.

  With a smile, she contends, “You know what I mean.”

  I nod with a grin.

  “You should be proud of yourself,” she mentions. “You have allowed the healing process to begin, which will allow your life to flourish in ways you could never have imagined.”

  A fluttery feeling in my stomach surfaces hearing her words.

  She pats my shoulder and kisses my cheek. “There still might be obstacles in your way, but you have begun to shape your own path in life rather than let life control the path for you.”

  Ninety Nine

  It’s a week before Christmas and my friends, family and I are all gathered in the larger of two homes we’ve rented for most of our stay in New York. I personally don’t like to celebrate the holiday for a variety of reasons with part of it being that I’m not religious — but, I’m not an atheist. We put up a tree after taking Jade, Rey and Jet to a local shop that brings in trees from a farm in New Jersey — their first few days in New York are spent sight-seeing and shopping while trying to find the perfect tree. Jade didn’t find it until today, the fifth farm that she visited. Most of the Li and Wú families are scattered between the open kitchen and the living room as Jared, Nathan, Maggie, Amy and Kim help Rey and Jade decorate the tree. I sit on the couch watching and taking a few photos of everything happening.

  Mŭqīn and Nǎinai are in the kitchen preparing dinner with the aid of Joanna and Pop-Pop. Along with my family, Henry’s parents are with us, and we’re waiting on Joe and his parents to arrive along with Brittany, Leslie, Martin, Celia and Mr. and Mrs. Nelson. I got to see my reacquainted friends in New Jersey several times since arriving on the East Coast and wanted to include them so they can meet my entire California family in a more controlled and comfortable setting for me.

  By the time everyone arrives, the tree is finished and glowing full of love and beauty. I feed Sadie and take her out for a quick walk with my bodyguards. Jared joins me, happy to get some fresh air despite the chill. As we round the corner of the building to rejoin our family, it begins to snow.

  After a long and delicious dinner, everyone gathers in the living room to chat and play games. The children stay up a little later than usual since Jade doesn’t have school, and our guests stay late into the evening. Jared, Nathan, Pop-Pop, Joanna, Maggie, Henry and I see the final guests out as we head downstairs to the floor below where we’re staying in a similar condo.

  The next day, I go with Amy and Kim to take the children ice skating. Everyone’s skated before, but it’s been a long time since I have and I’m not sure how this will be. Pop-Pop and Joanna watch from the sidelines while Maggie, Henry and Joe join the rest of us on the ice. Jared and Nathan pull me around the ice as my legs wobble under me. When they decide to skate together, I’m left in the middle of the rink with children zooming past me.

  “Come on,” Joe shouts, grabbing for my arm. He glides across the ice as if it’s nothing, not a single effort needed or required.

  Our hands slip and I fall to the ice just as he pulls forward.

  “Sorry,” he declares. “You okay?” Joe assists me to a standing position.

  “I’m good,” I claim as my knees and hip sting from the fall.

  “You sure?” he checks.

  I nod brushing myself off.

  “Let’s try something different,” he suggests, moving behind me and placing his hands on my hip.

  “What are you doing?” I ask full of concern.

  “Just keep your legs shoulder width apart and I’ll push,” he says, not giving me the chance to object.

  “What?!” I shriek. We’re a quarter into the stretch of the right side of the rink a few seconds later.

  “There you go, Emma,” Maggie comments skating up on my right, holding Henry’s hand.

  As Joe and I round the first turn, he comments, “I’m surprised that for a Jersey girl you don’t know how to skate.”

  “Ha ha,” I reply. “Very funny. I’m not a Jersey girl and haven’t been for a long while.”

  “I know,” Joe agrees. “Didn’t you skate when you were little?”

  “Yeah, but I don’t really remember it much,” I admit. “It was a long time ago.”

  “You were only gone for nine years,” Joe counters.

  “I haven’t skated since I was probably ten or eleven,” I object. “It’s been too long for muscle memory to kick in.”

  “True,” Joe agrees. “Looks like we need to practice more since you’re here.”

  “No,” I disagree. “I don’t doubt that someone has already spotted us and is posting about how ungraceful I am.”

  “You’re graceful,” he comments.

  My foot hits a knot in the ice, taking us to the ground. “No, I’m not,” I laugh.

  “You okay, Emma?” Jared asks, skating over with Nathan.

  “Yeah,” I confirm, trying to stand up with his and Joe’s help. My hands and knees sting.

  “That looked like a nasty one,” Nathan comments.

  “I cushioned his fall,” I reply, still laughing.

  “We’re good,” Joe suggests, but I can see he’s not telling the truth.

  When Jared and Nathan skate off, I say, “You got hurt.”

  “No,” Joe lies with a pained smile.

  “Liar,” I claim.

  “I’ll be fine,” Joe tries to brush it off.

  “How about a break?” I suggest.

  Joe and I move to join Pop-Pop and Joanna on a bench once Joe successfully manages to toe me across the ice. Seeing that Joe’s in pain, I take my skates off and get the four of us some hot chocolate while we rest and watch the rest of our friends and family enjoy themselves for the next hour. When we get up to leave, I see that Joe’s limping a little and tries to hide it.

  Later that day, we make our way over to Joe’s parents’ house since they invited everyone over for an early Christmas feast because we won’t all be together on Christmas Day. All of Joe’s brothers are in attendance as well, and Tony and Thomas don’t hesitate to make advances. Their deliberate attempts get chuckles from Jared and Nathan and sparks and idea for me. When the time comes for me to use the restroom, I grab my purse and text Joe a cheesy pickup line in honor of his brothers.

  I check the internet for something funny and send,
“There’s a party in my pants and you’re invited.”

  When I round the corner back to the living room, I see a smirk on Joe’s face. Two seconds later, my phone buzzes and I eagerly look down to see his response. My eyes find What’s your favorite silverware? . . . because I like to spoon!.

  Halfway through dinner, my phone buzzes in my pocket and I discreetly check it on my lap. I prepare myself for whatever it may be, but heat rises in my cheeks when I see that Joe has written I can’t wait to make you cum all over my face. Our eyes temporarily connect, only lasting a second or two because I can feel my face flushing more. After a few breaths, I respond I can’t wait to suck on your candy cane.

  By the time my friends and I are hanging out in the second living room on the third floor, I get another text from Joe saying So, I heard you have the hots for me. I ponder the option to either send a pickup line or dirty text. Once I take another sip of wine, I write I’m not drunk, just intoxicated by you.

  Through the rest of the night, Joe and I send each other different dirty and funny messages. Our crazy conversation continues when we’re in separate vehicles on our way to sleep for the night. Joe, Jimmy and Allen head to their New York penthouse while my family and I head back to the rentals.

  “I wish you were here,” Joe admits.

  I try to hide my reaction, but it’s not easy when we’re video chatting. “Me too,” I agree.

  “I had fun,” Joe shares. “I liked writing dirty and corny pickup lines.”

  “Yeah,” I say. “I’m glad you played along. I wasn’t sure if you would or if you would threaten to spank me again.”

  “You can send me messages like that anytime,” Joe suggests. “I really like them.”

  “Really?” I check a little surprised.

  “Yeah,” he confirms. “I wasn’t as surprised this time, so I didn’t think to spank you.”

  “Oh,” I say disappointed.

  “That doesn’t mean I won’t on occasion,” he reveals.

  A smile pops on my face.

  “Seriously, though,” Joe begins. “Don’t hesitate to write anything like that to me.”

  “Does it turn you on?” I peruse.

  “Yes, especially since I know that it means you’re thinking of me,” he explains.

  I don’t say anything.

  “So, how often do you think of me,” he asks eagerly.

  “Oh, I don’t know,” I say, pretending that I don’t really know.

  I think about him everyday and surprisingly to me the thoughts aren’t always just about sex.

  “Good to know,” Joe states confidently.

  “I didn’t say anything,” I announce.

  “You didn’t have to,” he reveals. “I could see it on your face.”

  “I should go,” I redirect. “It’s getting late.”

  Joe laughs. “Goodnight, beautiful.”

  “Goodnight, Joe.”

  At one in the morning, I’m wide awake and unable to sleep. I get dressed and text Taylor that I’m going out for a late night walk. Five minutes later, he has the car in the front of the building and I’m getting in alone, leaving Sadie behind. Fifteen minutes later, I arrive to my destination and Anna greets me at the door. I knew there was a good chance she’d get my text and she confirmed that the desk contacted her upon my arrival.

  Tip-toeing across the marble floor and up the stairs after my boots have been removed, the door to Joe’s bedroom opens effortlessly and soundlessly. He doesn’t move when I slink over the bed until my lips touch his.

  “Hi,” he greets after taking a moment to realize that he’s not dreaming. “What are you doing here?”

  “I can go,” I tease, pulling away.

  “No,” he says with his voice getting louder as he pulls me into him. “Stay.” His warm lips seek out mine, playing as our tongues swirl. “How did you get in?”

  “Anna,” I share. “I couldn’t sleep. You got me so turned on with all your sex talk.”

  “Where’s Sadie?” he asks, looking around.

  “Back at the rental,” I confess. “I didn’t want to risk her being seen or heard here.”

  “You don’t plan on staying,” he comments disappointedly.

  “I’m here, at least for a little bit,” I present.

  Joe smiles, wrapping himself around me. The warmth of his body quickly takes the chill off of mine from being outside in the cold. The car didn’t have enough time to fully warm up before we got to Joe’s place. Once he has me undressed halfway, Joe gets up and heads to the bathroom to get a condom.

  For the next hour or two, our naked bodies conduct our symphony of ecstasy and pleasure.

  One Hundred

  Jared, Maggie, Nathan and Sadie join me when I go back to New Jersey to see Mr. and Mrs. Nelson. This time, I feel more confident in my ability to stay calm and controlled while I’m there. The six of us relax in the kitchen, eating and chatting freely. Mr. and Mrs. Nelson share more stories about when I was young eagerly.

  “Can we see it?” Nathan inquires.

  “What?” I check.

  “The house?” he explains.

  A lump catches in my chest, making it hard to breathe.

  “Maybe next time,” Jared offers.

  “I’m not ready for that,” I admit, bowing my head.

  “That’s understandable,” Maggie assures.

  “Thanks,” I accept.

  “Nothing’s changed,” Mr. Nelson reminds.

  “I know,” I say nervously.

  “Benjamin,” Mrs. Nelson scolds.

  “What?” he defends.

  “It’s okay, really,” I soothe.

  Before leaving the neighborhood, Jared, Maggie, Nathan and I walk around — they want to see where I grew up.

  “Do you remember anything?” Maggie questions.

  “A little,” I answer honestly.

  Pointing to a small park when we round the corner to the block, I mention, “That’s where I learned to ride a bike.”

  “Cool,” Jared replies.

  As we continue to walk, many things look like they’ve changed so much that my memories are foggy. The bitter chill in the air scares us away, pushing us back in the car to return to our families.

  While everyone hides in their rooms to wrap gifts after dinner, I sit out in the living room with Sadie as I triple check everything for Raven Media. The programers finished everything two weeks ago and the servers are fully functional — we’re just waiting for the official release which will be taking place after the New Year.

  The Covelli staff for each of their businesses are already using our cloud-based system and have been since just before Thanksgiving. They reported an increase in profits and practically every one of their hotels are completely reserved for the entire holiday season. They own over twenty hotels in New York alone and they’re booked solid at least four weeks after the upcoming fashion show season at the end of January. All of our clients who were receiving management services from Raven previously now have their own staff who are utilizing our system also.

  Late in the evening, once everyone is off to bed, I make my way over to Joe’s. He greets me happily at the door, yanking me behind him as we rush off to his bedroom. We cuddle for a while before getting naked. As we lay snuggling, Joe seems a bit nervous. When I ask him what’s going on, he brushes it off until he can no longer hide his excitement.

  “I got you something,” he confesses, reaching for something in his nightstand.

  “What?!” I protest. “We agreed no gifts.”

  “It’s just a little something,” he says, placing a small white box that is tied with a red ribbon in my hands.

  My breathing becomes shallow, my palms begin to sweat and I find myself having trouble swallowing.

  “It’s not what you think,” Joe reports with mixed emotions splashed across his face.

  “How am I supposed to respond to that,” I say.

  There are only a few things that come inside a box this size.r />
  Realizing that I’m hesitant to open the gift, Joe does it for me. His fingers reach inside and my eyes close, not wanting to see. It takes a second or two before curiosity consumes the kitten. My eyes open to find Joe holding up a metal ring with two keys on it.

  “What is it?” I ask, rendered clueless by the gift.

  “They’re keys,” he chuckles.

  “Obviously,” I retort. “Why are you giving me keys?”

  “They’re to my place,” he reveals. “This one is for the penthouse in California and this one is for here.”

  “What?!” I gasp. “No . . . No. No. No.” My body moves away from him as I search the room for my clothes.

  “What’s wrong?” Joe checks nervously. “They’re just keys.”

  “They aren’t just keys, Joe,” I snap.

  “Why are you upset,” Joe asks a little shocked.

  “I don’t want keys to your place . . . your places,” I say sternly, keeping my voice low to not wake Jimmy and Allen.

  “Why not? We’ve been spending the night at each other’s places for a while now,” he presents.

  “So?” I reply.

  “So, this just makes sense,” he explains.

  “No, it doesn’t. It’s just sex,” I remind.

  “Emma, seriously?!” he counters.

  “What?”

  “We’ve been having sex for five months,” he comments.

  “So?” I reply, still panicking.

  “So, it’s clearly more than just sex,” he contends.

  “No,” I object.

  “I haven’t been with anyone else and you’ve only been with Maggie on occasion, which technically doesn’t count,” he states calmly.

  “Maggie counts,” I argue, shrugging on my sweater, avoiding the real reason why I’m freaking out.

  “You know what I mean, Emma.”

  “I need to go,” I announce, searching for my boots and purse.

  “Emma,” Joe calls, moving toward me only wearing his underwear and a shirt.

  I grab my purse and head to the front door, remembering that my boots are in the closet.

  “Emma,” Joe whispers. “Emma, talk to me.” He tries to block me from getting my last boot. “Please, just talk to me.”