by Kylie Walker
“We’re making chicken stir-fry,” she said, proudly.
“Well I’m starving, let’s get started.”
She giggled again. “It’s only four o’clock. We have lots of time. Let’s go chop vegetables.”
“Chop vegetables? You can’t use a knife! You’re not even four foot tall.”
“Stop it! Get in the kitchen and put on your apron mister!” I laughed and followed her direction. For not even being four foot tall, she was just like all of the other women I knew…bossy.
When we got into the kitchen she put the grocery bag on the short counter that I had designed just for her. It came up to her chest and she was able to stand there and do whatever she wanted with the pint-sized kitchen tools I’d also bought and placed there for her. There was also a short sink next to the regular ones where she could wash her hands or vegetables or whatever. She loved it. Cooking was her passion and it made her smile. I’d do anything to see that smile.
She hit the play button on the IPod in the deck on the counter and then we both washed our hands and put on our aprons and started washing and chopping vegetables. Her apron said, “Beauty” and mine said, “The Beast.” My little sister Elise made them for us last Christmas. We love them.
While we worked and chopped she talked to me about school and her friends and how she’d learned to dive off of the bow of the yacht. At first I wasn’t crazy about the idea of her growing up on a yacht, but my parents had done everything in their power to make the rest of her world as normal as possible and she was a happy, healthy, amazing eight year old. They were doing a great job, yacht or not.
Ana got distracted by a song that came on and while she was singing to herself I let my thoughts go to a place I rarely did…back before my sister died. When Crystal came home strung out on opiates and pregnant my parents were frightened and disappointed for her but willing to do whatever she needed them to in order for the baby and her to both be healthy. She reluctantly agreed to rehab and she spent the first six months of her pregnancy in an addiction facility. We were all worried about how what she’d already done would affect a baby but no one talked about it out of fear it would somehow jinx us. My sister was clean, sober and almost back to her old self by the time Ana was born. My parents rented them a little house and for a few years things went okay. Crystal had a lot to learn about raising a baby, but we were all there to pitch in and help and for the first time in a long time she was willing to accept it.
When Ana was three years old thing started going south again. My mom started noticing the house they lived in was getting dirtier and dirtier and she even showed up a few times in the middle of the day and found Crystal sleeping and the baby wandering around the house alone. When my parents confronted Crystal about it she got angry and threatened to take Ana away from them. In California, grandparents don’t have automatic rights and my dad knew that because of his background in law. They were afraid, and rightfully so. Ana was about three and a half when Crystal showed up on their doorstep with her and said she couldn’t do it any longer. She left her with my parents and took off again. That time she was gone for about six months. No one knew if she was alive or dead and my parents had to fight with the courts to get legal custody of their granddaughter. When Ana was four Crystal showed up again. She was strung out and my parents told her the only way they’d let her stay was if she agreed to rehab again. She agreed and they let her stay in the pool house.
She called me that first night she was there. She was talking like everything that happened to her was my parent’s fault. I’d been there for all of their struggles and heartbreak and it made me angry. I yelled at her and told her she had to grow up and take responsibility for her own life. I even told her that Ana was better off without her if she wasn’t going to get and stay clean. Two days later my mother went to wake her up so they could take her back to the facility. She was dead with a needle in her arm. No one in my family has been the same since and I waffle between feelings of guilt for yelling at her in our last conversation, feelings of anger for what she did to her daughter and all of us that loved her and just plain despair for myself. I loved my sister but I lost her a long time before she died.
“Uncle Brett it’s all ready now. Did you heat the oil?” Ana and I have an agreement regarding cooking things in oil. She’s not allowed to do that until she can stand and reach the stove on her own. The idea of getting burnt physically hurted me.
“It’s good to go. Hand me the bowl.” She handed me the bowl of vegetables and I held it over the deep skillet on the stove. As I started to drop the vegetables in, the doorbell rang.
“Want me to get it?”
“Yes please,” I told her as the vegetables bubbled and danced in the oil. She slid off the stool she’d perched on to watch me and ran out of the kitchen. I wondered why eight year olds thought they had to run everywhere they go. I finished putting the vegetables in and when I reached for the bowl with the chicken I turned down the volume on the IPOD. I almost dropped the bowl of chicken when I heard the voice of who Ana was talking to. I pulled open the accordion blind that separated the kitchen island from the living room. Erica was standing in the doorway. She was wearing a pair of jean cut-offs and a red wife-beater tank. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail and she was smiling down at Ana. When she heard the shade open she looked up and her eyes locked into mine. I didn’t have to ask why she was there, I could see the apology in her pretty eyes. I realized at that moment how strong my feelings were for her. She hadn’t even offered it yet and I was ready to accept.
“Hey Erica,” I said for lack of a better opener.
“Uncle Brett are you watching the vegetables?” Ana chastised me.
“Yes, I’m watching them.” I looked back at Erica and said, “Did my boss introduce herself to you?”
Erica nodded and said, “Yes, Ana and I have met. Brett, I’m so sorry.”
Ana was looking from Erica to me then. I didn’t want to have any part of that conversation in front of her so I said, “It’s okay, there’s still plenty for you to do.” She looked at me slightly confused and I winked at her and told Ana, “I’m sorry I forgot to tell you I invited Erica for dinner. Is that okay?” Ana looked surprised. I’ve never had anyone come to one of our dinners before, but she’s a good-hearted little girl and she quickly said, “That’s fine. Erica do you want to help me make the rice?” Erica looked questioningly at me and I nodded slightly. She smiled at Ana again and said, “I’d love to.”
Chapter 16
ERICA
I can’t even describe in words how stupid I felt when Ana answered the door. I’d been obsessing since the night before about pushing Brett to a place where he was forced to tell me about his sister, drunk, angry and in the middle of a parking lot. I felt horrible and when I finally couldn’t stand the guilt any longer I talked to Adele about it. I told her exactly what happened and she was silent for a long time before she said, “Crystal’s dead?”
“That’s what he said. Did you know her well?”
She shook her head. “No. When I was friends with Elise, Crystal was already gone. I knew there was something going on but I never wanted to pry. They’re a really private family. I did know she had a baby now that I think about it though.”
“I feel horrible. I accused him again of being a player based on a text I saw from his niece.”
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course.”
“I’ve never known you to be a jealous person. You’ve always been so sure of yourself and confident that it didn't matter what anyone else did or said. You knew your own worth. Why is it so different with Brett?”
“I wish I knew. Adele I have these overwhelmingly strong feelings for him. It’s like when I’m near him my emotions are in the driver’s seat and I guess that scares me so much that I’m looking for reasons to pull away.”
“Why does it scare you?”
“Because I’m afraid of getting hurt.”
“Aren’t you hurting without him?”
I smiled at my smart cousin. “Yeah, I am.”
“Then go talk to him. Just put it out there and tell him how you feel. Apologize for last night if you feel the need to. Don’t waste time you should be spending together. The thought of Crystal being dead so young makes me remember that none of us have forever here. If you want something, you have to go after it.”
“Thank you, you’re right. Are we ever going to talk about you and Josh?”
“Maybe,” she said with a grin and a wink, “But not now. Now, you are going to go see Brett.”
She’d practically pushed me out the door and suddenly there I was having dinner and watching movies with him and his niece. Brett and I didn’t talk about anything serious while Ana was there. We simply enjoyed each other’s company and I really enjoyed getting to know Ana. She’s amazingly smart which doesn’t surprise me considering the family she comes from. She’s also sweet and funny and cute as hell. By the time Brett’s parent’s picked her up I was looking forward to the next time I saw her…if her uncle forgave me.
Brett closed the door after hugs and kisses were shared all the way around and when he turned back toward me I said, “I’m so sorry.”
He smiled. “What did you think of my little beauty?”
Smiling back I said, “I think you’re one lucky beast. I like her, a lot.”
“She likes you too.”
“How do you know?”
“Did you see her whisper in my ear just now?” I nodded and he said, “She was telling me not to do anything stupid and lose you, or something to that effect.”
I laughed and said, “If she only knew that I’m the stupid one.” He came over and sat down next to me. He took my hand in his and that simple touch sent thrills racing through my blood.
“You’re not stupid first of all. You jumped to conclusions but in your defense, I wasn’t doing a good job of sharing things with you. If you had more information about my life you may have had a clearer understanding about things.”
“Maybe, but it doesn’t excuse me. I just hope you’ll forgive me and we can start over. I’m really not a jealous person. It just feels like all of the rules change when you’re around.”
He grinned and said, “I know the feeling my grown-up beauty. You bring out the beast in me. I can’t imagine what your brother must think.”
I laughed and said, “You might have to do a little sucking up to Jordan the next time you see him.”
“Do you think it would help if I told him he’s always been one of my football heroes and I modeled my own game after his?”
“I know that would help. His ego is huge.” He laughed and said, “That goes with the territory.” His affect changed suddenly to a sad one and he asked, “Do you want to hear about my sister?”
I put my hand on the side of his face and said, “Only if you want to tell me.” He pulled me into his chest and we leaned back into the couch. After several minutes passed he started talking. He told me how much he loved her first and talked about their times growing up and how close they were. I listened quietly as he worked up to her beginning to party too much and then leaving home and showing back up pregnant. As he talked I could hear the quiver in his voice and my heart hurt for him and his family. I couldn’t imagine losing my brother that way.
He talked for almost an hour and when he finished I still didn’t say anything, I only held him. After a while I heard him whisper my name and I looked up at his gorgeous face.
“I want you in my life. I want you to be the only woman in my life, other than Ana and my mom and sister of course.”
I smiled. “I want to be in your life and I’ll gladly share you with the women in your family.” Brett leaned toward me then and I relaxed back into the couch. His tongue came out and licked at the crease of my mouth. I opened it and allowed him access. He kissed me, not hard and rough like he had the last time we were together. This one was soft and sweet and languid like we had all night, or a lifetime. I felt his hand slide down my body and slip between my legs. I moaned and opened my thighs. He let his fingers slide up inside the short leg of my denim cut-offs and within seconds he was touching my drenched lips. I began moving my hips in time with the movements of his fingers. His lips slid from my mouth to my neck and he kissed, licked and sucked there while he drove me crazy with one hand.
After several minutes of that and almost bringing me to climax that quickly he pulled his head up and said, “Can we go to the bedroom?” I nodded and he added, “Erica, I don’t want to have rough, passionate sex tonight. I want to make love to you. I want to show you how I feel about you. Okay?”
I actually almost giggled. That was so incredibly okay. I couldn’t form words for some reason however so I simply nodded again. He stood up and helped me up beside him. He held my hand until we got to the bedroom and we stood at the side of the bed and kissed as we both stripped off our clothes. When I was naked and my chest was rising and falling in an erratic pattern because he was naked too and I was so turned on, he put his hand underneath my hair and tipped my face up toward his. “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
As he kissed me again I felt him turn so the bed was behind him. He sat down slowly with his hands on my hips now and pulled me down into his lap. I spread my legs and straddled him with one knee on either side of his thighs. I pushed down and I could feel the thrill of his hot, twitching cock press up against my wet pussy and my aching clit. He reached for my legs and straightened them out alongside him before taking the cheeks of my ass in his hands and lifting me up. I reached down and took his erection in my hands and lined him up with my opening. We both groaned as he entered me. I’ve never felt as complete as I do when Brett’s inside of me. It’s like there was a piece of me missing all of this time and I’d finally found it. Maybe there was something to that fate thing he was talking about after all.
He moved into me slowly, advancing inch by inch until he hit bottom. My body convulsed and I cried out when he did. I felt my muscles gripping him tightly as he pulled back, not wanting to let him go but knowing that the next slide in would be just as good if not better. Over and over he moved in and out of me as we both slowly moved our hips like we were doing a sexy dance. The whole time he was touching me all over lightly with his fingers and palms, feeling every part of me like he couldn’t get enough. I had my hands on his biceps, feeling them flex and relax, flex and relax again. I saw him move his head and look over to the right. I looked too and I could see us together in the mirror on his dresser.
Watching us connect that way was the most erotic and beautiful sight I’d ever seen. I could see that Brett felt the same way by the look in his eyes and feel it in the intensity of his movements. He wrapped me up in his strong arms, stood up off the bed and laid me down on my back. I whimpered when he fell out of me but almost as quickly he was back on top of me and sliding into my wet tunnel once again. I moaned and urged him on. I could see raw need on his face and I began to roll my hips and move faster.
My movements urged him on and he pushed deeper and moved faster. I pulled my head up off the bed and found his lips. We kissed and tried to breathe as he pulled and pushed in and out of me over and over taking me to the very edge of my control. I reached back and grabbed his hard cheeks and squeezed them as I pulled him into me deeper urging him to go faster. He complied, taking me to that place where I no longer controlled my orgasm, but it controlled me, and then he stopped and pulled out again. This time he rolled onto his back and pulled me up on top of him. He grinned up at me and said, “Make love to me baby. I want to watch your face when you come.”
That did it for me. I straddled him and let him slide back up inside of me. I was so wet it took little effort and both of our bodies were covered in a light, shiny sheen of sweat that helped me slide back and forth against him. He reached up and used his big fingers to circle the tips of my hard nipples. I pressed into
them with my chest and arched my back to take him deeper as our bodies ground together. He played with my nipples for a few minutes and then slid his hands down my back and gripped my ass. He used that grip to slide me up and down on him faster and harder. I barreled toward my orgasm at a million miles a minute while he coaxed me on with soft whispers about how beautiful I was and licks and kisses to my breasts. My body tightened up and I felt everything inside of me shatter as the orgasm exploded inside of me. I cried out and Brett gripped my ass tightly and held me down on his cock, only moving slightly until I’d finished coming. It was incredible and made me lightheaded and strangely enough, wanting more.
Without missing a beat I pressed my chest down into his and buried my face in his neck. I started moving my hips again, quickening my pace as he flexed his hips up into me. I felt his body tensing and heard his whispers of my name and then, “I’m so close baby.”
I ground my hips down and circled them. He cried out and I knew he was there. He held onto me so tightly that it hurt, but I didn’t care. I never wanted him to let go. He held me in place while he came inside of me, neither of us even thinking about the fact that he hadn’t put on a condom. I’m protected as far as pregnancy goes, and finally I trust him, so I wasn’t worried about it. The warm, wet feeling of him filling me up was almost too overwhelming for me to handle. I literally saw stars when I closed my eyes and I held onto him tight while his movements changed from harsh and frenetic to slow and leisurely as he finished up his orgasm. I let my body relax on top of his when he finished and he wrapped his arms around my back. We lay there and enjoyed the aftershocks for a long time and the first word he said when his breaths were under control was, “Wow.”