Alisiyad

by Sarah R. Suleski

  “I’m going to kill you,” Liseli said through her teeth. She could feel her hands around the small neck already. It would feel good to squeeze.

  “No.” The voice was only the Child’s again. Alisiya shook her head sadly. “No. You’re going free me, and yourself. This . . . this is a mess. But it will pass. You will see.”

  “I’m not going to move until you bring back the water,” Liseli said, staring hard at the ground. She could see each dry, crusted crack of the earth at her feet. “I’ll never take you anywhere if you don’t bring back the water.” Maybe it didn’t matter. Maybe it was too late. Maybe it wasn’t. She couldn’t listen to Alisiya. She shut her mind down hard. She could feel Alisiya trying to get in. No, out. Alisiya was trying to get out. She was already inside.

  Where am I really?

  “It will do you no good anymore. You heard Halla. Even if you had the water, do you think it would matter?” Alisiya sounded concerned. Liseli would not look at her. Her voice was like a river of sympathy, only frustrated that Liseli would not listen to reason. “He has bled to death. Please, Liseli. Stop trying to fight it. You have already lost. Fate has won, it will always win.”

  “You killed him.” Liseli clenched her fists.

  “Not I. Those were my father’s dogs. It is the same as before. You know the story. You know what he does to rivals.” Alisiya’s tone became bitter. “And did you not wonder what it was that saved you from the dogs? They were sent for both of you, one for each. But you could not die; it wasn’t your destiny to die then. Don’t you understand?”

  Liseli looked up slowly. The sand had settled back down around her, and the air was crystal clear. There was no breeze. It was like being under a glass dome. There were no sounds but Alisiya’s voice. “But if you could save me you could have saved him. You just didn’t want to. Because you wanted him to d-die.”

  “I—”

  “You said so!” Liseli screamed out sharply, balling up her fists against her temples. Alisiya was taken aback for a moment. She paused, watching, and Liseli felt herself begin to choke again. She flattened her palms against her face.

  “I said it had to be,” Alisiya shook her head, clasping her hands against her chest. “It had to be because that is what I foresaw—I foresaw the future, which is fate. One person. Only one person would take me through. Anyone else was in the way, not in my way, but the way of the future.” Alisiya’s voice was measured and patient. She held out her hands, and tilted her head to the side. Her eyes were earnest and pleading. Understand. Understand me.

  “It was the dogseye stone that marked you as safe, and stopped the dogs from harming you, not I. As for Russ — you simply had to be freed of him, whether it be you, I, or my father’s dogs who did it. Do you think that if I could write the way the world goes that I would needlessly kill? Do you? Then you don’t know me. But you don’t need to. All you have to do is lead me through the Gate, that is all I have seen. What you think of me means nothing.”

  Liseli clamped both hands over her ears. She wanted to scream again, but her throat was too dry. It was cracking like the dirt. Soon she would crumble into dust like the jug. Don’t tell me what to do! She didn’t have to say it. Alisiya heard it.

  “You will do as I’ve told you in the end,” she replied. “You’ll see.”

  “Never.”

  Alisiya sighed, and cast her gaze skyward. A small white cloud appeared out of nowhere and expanded into a haze. “This is all a mess. If I had not seen my vision I would despair; your attitude is impossible. Do you want the water? Do you think that there is still time to save him? Honestly? Here. Take it. Have it. All the water you want. But water isn’t what he needs, is it?”

  Liseli looked at her feet. “It h-helped h-him before,” she said, closing her eyes and feeling each little grain of sand prick and grate against them. “It heals.”

  “Can water bring back blood?” Alisiya’s voice was in her ear. “Can it?”

  “Go away!” Liseli suddenly felt tears coming. They were wet and hot, turning to mud on her face.

  “Can it?” Alisiya insisted. She stopped. Liseli could feel her eyes upon her. When she spoke again there was new urgency in her voice. “Liseli . . . ? Liseli, wake up. Wake up, Liseli. Do it now.”

  “No,” Liseli opened her eyes. But she wouldn’t wake up. She looked at Alisiya. Alisiya was worried now. She realized that if she did not wake up she would die. And then where would Alisiya be? “I won’t. Not until you . . . not until you . . . .” Her voice drifted off as she saw something bubbling up underneath the dry crust of the earth. The cracks began to swim with thick red liquid. It swarmed up through the ground as if wellsprings of life were everywhere. Liseli’s feet were wet. Her chest felt wet, and she saw in shock that blood was running down her chest. A heart hung from the chain around her neck. It was the size the dogseye stone had been — the size of a baby’s or a small child’s heart. It was perfect, each atrium and ventricle proportioned just right. It pumped away; pumping out blood which ran over Liseli down into the dirt.

  “The answer is yes, Liseli.” Alisiya’s voice drew her attention away. “The Chaiorra can bring back blood.”

  Liseli looked up as the Chaiorra began to flow around her ankles, red and warm. Alisiya crouched on the rock, leaning forward. “Wake up, Liseli,” she raised her voice, yelling now. “You are drowning. Don’t you understand? You are dying. You can’t die. Not yet. Wake up before you drown. There is your water. It has always been there. Take it and go!”

  Liseli looked back down at her feet. It wasn’t water; it was blood. “If I die it’s your fault,” she said slowly, unable to care. So this was dreaming. This was drowning. This was dying. It was true what they said. She didn’t feel anything, now that she knew. But the heart labored on.

  “No. You won’t wake up. You’re doing this on purpose.” Alisiya was angry. She was helpless. She reached out a hand, all the way from the rock. It reached Liseli and touched her head, but Liseli shook it away.

  “Go away. Leave me alone.”

  “No!” Alisiya reached out again, seizing her head between both hands. She pressed together, and made Liseli look into her eyes. They were no longer black, they were a pale blue, almost white. As Liseli stared, locked into them, the color shifted to dark blue and azure, but always remained the white blue, somehow. Liseli couldn’t turn away. Alisiya spoke: “You won’t die, not now. Look around you. This is my river, this is my blood, all of this is mine. You drank from this river and now you are mine. You are mine, Liseli, and you won’t die for him. I am Alisiya, and you will die for no one but me. Don’t you understand?”

  Liseli closed her eyes, but she felt herself falling again. She was falling out of the dream. Falling fast. The beating heart dragged her down. But she wouldn’t wake up. The dream would end and death would begin. Yes. She would die, and Alisiya would lose her. It was all clear. Nothing could make her wake up. I will drown, and it will all be over.

  Chapter 18 ~ Alone With The Sleeping

  When Russ woke up he was in bed. He stared at the ceiling for a moment. The light in the room was bright and orange . . . it must be evening. Late afternoon sun shone through the balcony windows. He was on his back, and started to roll over onto his left side, but pain shot through his body as soon as he stirred. At first he didn’t know why, but then he remembered. He lay very still for a little while, feeling each wound throb. He wondered if he was disfigured. Maybe if he looked the mirror he’d see that his face was lopsided or his shoulder was shriveled. His left shoulder felt shriveled. One of the dogs had gotten him really good there.

  He thought he should be bandaged up, but didn’t feel anything on him. He looked down over the blankets covering his body, then cautiously moved his arms and looked at them. His arms hurt; he could remember every puncture from the dogs’ teeth, but when he looked them over he didn’t see anything. He touched his neck gingerly, but didn’t feel any scars, stitches, or open wounds. But there have to be . . . . He felt
like he was hanging open.

  Russ opened his mouth and tested moving his jaw in a circle. He pushed the blankets down and inspected his chest and shoulders, lifting a white nightshift away from the skin, still expecting to see gaping wounds. Nothing. He looked the same. But I can’t be imagining it. It still hurts. And he knew for a fact that he hadn’t put that nightgown on himself. Someone had put him in bed. The last time he’d been standing by himself was on the pavilion steps outside.

  The room was eerily quiet, he thought. If he had been injured shouldn’t there be someone there? Where was the blood? Where were the doctors? Where was Liseli? Where were his wounds? He saw a jug sitting on the table next to the bed, but otherwise the room looked the same as before. Russ slowly moved his legs to the side, pushing the blankets away as he slid out of bed. His legs felt fine. They hadn’t gotten his legs.

  He walked up to the mirror over the bureau and looked in. There was nothing different about his appearance . . . . Well, maybe he was whiter. But he could just be imagining that. He hurt the most along the left side of his chest and shoulder up to the neck. He pulled the shirt away and touched his neck again, watching in the mirror. Experimentally he pressed down against his skin. It didn’t hurt any worse, or any less.

  The wounds were there, though. Under the surface, things weren’t okay. It was as if his skin had healed perfectly over torn muscles. Internal bleeding? Is that what this is?

  The door opened. Russ looked up hopefully, thinking, Liseli. But it was Halla. She stopped when she saw him, and he automatically looked down at his legs self-consciously. The nightgown . . . thing . . . only came down to about mid thigh.

  “You’re awake,” Halla said, smiling.

  “Yeah,” Russ sat back down on the bed.

  “How do you feel?”

  “Um . . . .” He folded his hands in his lap, then reached up to scratch his head. “Like I’ve been mauled by wolves, I guess.” He tried to laugh, and watched her reaction. He wanted to know if it had really happened. Maybe he was just going crazy.

  “Not wolves. Dogs. Leeton’s dogs,” Halla corrected, looking out over the balcony. They were both silent for a moment. Then Halla broke from her reverie and walked over to the jug. “Now that you’re awake you can drink this for yourself,” she said, pouring water from it into a cup. She extended it to him.

  He took it, and she folded her hands in front of her.

  “What is it?”

  “Chaiorra water. Medicine, to you.” She nodded.

  He was about to drink, but then stopped and lowered the cup. “Why aren’t I hurt anymore?” he asked.

  She unfolded one hand and motioned to the jug. “I don’t know how many of those you’ve gone through. Quite a few. At first we used sponges, but then when your wounds began to close up enough we filled the tub up with it and let you soak for a while.” She wasn’t looking at him as she talked. “You would have died, otherwise, of course. You lost a great deal of blood. You don’t have very much blood in you right now, Russell Markson. You have water in your veins.”

  Russ stared at her profile with his mouth open, still holding the cup in his hand. So that was it. He looked down at it, dubiously. “Keep drinking,” she said, returning her gaze to him.

  Russ smiled, despite the pain. He drank from the cup, and felt a little better. It was like medicine. Good tasting medicine, though he couldn’t say what it tasted like. He could almost imagine it washing through him and stitching him up as it went.

  “Where’s Liseli?”

  Halla’s lips twisted to the side. The grimace lasted for only a split second, but Russ didn’t miss it. “What?” He sat up straighter. “Is she hurt?” He thought he remembered her moving around, talking, yelling . . . but he couldn’t be sure. He’d probably been delirious. “Halla? Is she?”

  “No.” Halla smiled. “She’s sleeping.”

  “Was she hurt?”

  Halla shook her head.

  “Then why is she sleeping?” Russ gripped the cup. Something wasn’t right. His neck began to throb again.

  “Don’t become excited,” Halla admonished, still shaking her head. “Drink more water.”

  “What’s the matter with her?” Russ stood up, not caring at that moment how short his shift was.

  “Russell Markson—” she kept using his full name “—please. She is not injured, she is simply sleeping in her room. Resting. She’s had a trying day.”

  Russ paused, wondering if he could trust Halla. No. Trust; that had got him chewed up and spat out by dogs. “I’m going to go see her,” he decided.

  “Don’t disturb her, she’s sleeping,” Halla said, but didn’t move. She seemed aware of the futility of trying to stop him.

  “I want to put my pants on.”

  “I think you should go back to sleep, as well,” Halla said, but moved toward the door. “You shouldn’t be walking around and working yourself up.”

  “Thanks.”

  She shrugged and left. Russ found the Alisiyan pants, the ones with no pockets, and slipped them on. He’d have thought that after being watered all afternoon he would need to take a piss, but he didn’t. He’d retained all the water and felt like he could drink more. There was something wrong with that. But he left the room, not wanting to waste any time. He had to make sure Liseli really was in her room.

  Halla was waiting for him when he went out into the hall. He followed her to Liseli’s room, even though he already knew where it was. She opened the door and they went in.

  Liseli was in her bed. Her hair was spread out over her pillow and down over her shoulders, and her arms rested over the blankets at her sides. She slept peacefully. Nothing seemed wrong.

  “She’s very tired,” Halla said. Russ walked over and sat down on the edge of the bed, trying to decide whether or not he was going to wake her up. It might just be selfish to disturb her . . . but . . . . He glanced up at Halla and cleared his throat.

  She looked at the floor. She misunderstood his prompt, and began to speak. “She ran away after. . . . None of us understood where she was going, but then Eliasha finally calmed enough to tell us about the crack in the wall, and the river. She ran after Liseli even though Arlic forbade it. They tried to grab her, but . . . ” Halla shrugged, and allowed a smile to play over her face. “I don’t know what happened, but Eliasha found her floating in the river. She had almost drowned. No, she had drowned. But Eliasha saved her. She pulled her out and got the water out of her lungs.”

  Russ looked at Liseli. She was breathing deeply and evenly. He reached out and touched her arm, but she didn’t stir. He remembered how Eliasha had stopped him when he tried to run to Liseli, before the dogs attacked. She would have left Liseli standing there alone. But then she saved her? He didn’t know what to make of it.

  Halla was still speaking: “Liseli had taken a jug down to the river, and she was still holding it. Eliasha almost could not pry it out of her hands, even though she was unconscious. She had to leave her by the riverbank in order to bring back the jug, but if she hadn’t you would be dead . . . you were almost gone by that time as it was. After that we took a wagon down to the river and returned with Liseli, and filled up more jugs for you.”

  Halla waited for a response. Russ smiled faintly, moving his hand up Liseli’s arm. But she still didn’t wake up. He looked at Halla. “Has she been up since then?”

  Halla looked sideways at the floor. “No. We haven’t been able to rouse her. At all.”

  His stomach dropped. “Why didn’t you tell me that before?”

  “I didn’t want to excite you. You still need your rest,” said Halla. He thought it was a lame excuse.

  Russ shook his head, and leaned over Liseli. He tried to wake her. He said her name, and shook her gently, and even though Halla was there he kissed her, first on her forehead and then on the lips. But she didn’t wake up. She didn’t even show any signs of a response. He had to double check to make sure she was breathing like he’d thought. She was. She just woul
dn’t wake up.

  He looked back up at Halla. “How many hours has it been?”

  “Almost seven, now.”

  He didn’t want to panic. Liseli had almost drowned. For you . . . . She deserved her rest. But she should still respond when he tried to wake her. Something was wrong. He wondered if it was usual for people who survived drowning to sleep too deeply. He’d never heard anything of that sort.

  “Give her more time,” said Halla gently. “Have some dinner . . . and go back to sleep, and perhaps she’ll have woken up in the morn—”

  “No.” He straightened and looked at her. This just wasn’t the time to go with the flow. Liseli was in a co . . . no, he couldn’t think it. She was sleeping deeply. That was all.

  “There’s nothing more you can do.” Halla spread out her hands. “We’ve made her comfortable. That’s all we can do.”

  Russ looked down at his feet, then rested his elbows on his knees and ran his hands through his hair. It was hard to think in pain. It was hard to worry. He didn’t know what to do.

  “Come,” said Halla. “Leave her be . . . and you should eat something.”

  He lifted his head. He watched Liseli for a moment while Halla waited for him. “She doesn’t like this room.”

  “What?”

  “She doesn’t.” He shook his head. “She can’t sleep well in here. She told me.”

  “Well . . . .” Halla paused, in brief confusion. Russ stood up and leaned over Liseli, pulling the covers aside. “What are you doing?” Halla stepped forward, as if she would stop him. But she didn’t.

  “I’m taking her to my room,” said Russ. “I told you, she doesn’t like this room.”

  Halla was silent for a moment, then she said dryly, “You are not thinking that you are going to carry her—”

  Russ was thinking that. He was getting used to the constant pain from his “phantom” wounds, and he didn’t feel weak. He could carry Liseli down the hallway. Easy. “Yeah.” He pulled her toward him and began to lift her up. “I’m not gonna leave her here, anyway.”