Sneaking Around (Sneaky Love Book 2)

by Chelle Pimblott

  “Look Dan, I wanted to apologise.” Alex says as I say, “We need to talk about business.”

  “Please Dan, can I speak first? Business can wait.” I wave my hand at him to continue, not that I’m too interested in his apologies. “I want and need to apologise for my behaviour the other night. I was wrong and out of line, I can see that now but you have to understand. It’s been my job since we were young to look after Mia and yes, before you tell me, I know she's a grown arse woman now who can make her own decisions. It’s just, you guys took me by surprise and as I said to her earlier when she finally let me in the house to talk to her, when I thought about it, I knew it would happen. I knew you two were in love with each other and it was only a matter of time before you worked it out as well.” I go to say something but he waves his hand at me. “Please, don’t Dan. You can say the same thing that Mia did but I saw it, I knew it was coming and still it surprised me.”

  “That doesn’t excuse the way you treated Mia or the things you said about me Alex. You were right there next to me, doing the same things that I was. Then you found Ally and you changed, you changed for the woman you love. I’ve never believed that I would find that and I was happy with my life.”

  “You deserve to be happy man and I’m sorry. I didn’t mean any of that bullshit, it was unfair and cruel. It was a load of crap. I knew it then but I was just so angry that you had kept this from me. I thought you of all people would be honest with me.” I go to speak but he holds his hand up again, “let me finish, please? Ally made me really hear everything that Mia said that night. We’ve had many, let’s call them ‘conversations’, about that night. Don’t get me wrong, I already knew I’d been an arsehole and that I’d hurt two people that are very important to me, but Ally made me really understand what was said. Mia asked you not say anything, didn’t she?” I nod and he continues, “I realised that if Ally asked to me not to say something, I wouldn’t. I love her that much that I would have kept any secret that she asked me to. That’s when I realised how much you love my sister. Well that and when you slammed out of her front door that night. Not to mention that the only words you said were in defence of my sister. You were pissed at me but you were just as mad, if not more so, with her because she did what you’d planned to do. Didn’t she? You were ready to walk away, make the sacrifice to save our tiny family. Weren’t you?”

  “Yes Alex I’m ready to walk away to save her family, you’re all she has left. I’m glad you’ve realised that your sister isn’t a baby anymore and you’re going to let her make her own mistakes and decisions.” He nods at me and it’s my turn to keep going. “She’s made her decision and we’re all living with it. I also accept your apology for being a douche canoe. Now, can we talk about business please?”

  “We’re not going to talk about how you’re in love with my sister and she's in love with you, then?”

  “She said that?”

  “Said what?”

  “Fuck you arsehole. Did Mia say that she's in love with me?”

  “Not those words exactly, no but she didn’t disagree with me when I said she was, just like you didn’t just now either.”

  “Ok, well then I guess that tells you something then doesn’t it?” I ask, not really looking for an answer, so I don’t wait for one. “Let’s get down to business, I’ve passed all the current projects I was working on over to Jack, right before I left for my break. Over the next couple of weeks, I can help him with the projects you’ve got on the books that you were going to let me handle and you can supervise him like you would have me, once my notice is up. I’ve been thinking about it and if you need me once I’m finished, I can come in and give Jack a hand on a casual basis but be warned, I am going to be busy elsewhere.” No, I don’t have that other job yet but I will and even if I don’t, I don’t want him to think I’ll be sitting around here miserable without work.

  “I’m sorry, did you just you we were giving me notice? As in, you’re QUITTING? You CAN'T quit you fucking dickhead, YOU’RE A PARTNER!”

  “Well, we never did make that official, there are no papers stating that fact, so I consider myself an employee of your construction company. To answer your first question, yes, I’m giving you my notice. I can give you two weeks or if you would rather I stay on for four to give Jack a longer chance to get things straight, I’m good with that.”

  “But, you’re a partner, Dan. You’re my partner Dan, are you really walking away from that? From our friendship? Is it really that easy for you?”

  “EASY! Are you fucking kidding me right now Alex? Do you really think that any of this is easy for me? You said some pretty shitty things to me a week ago and you think I want to be in business with you still? That requires a certain amount of trust and obviously, you don’t trust me.”

  “I apologised Dan, I meant every word. I know I was a dickhead, I was taking out my feelings of inadequacy on you. I didn’t want to see that Mia was a grown woman, who is more than capable of making her own decisions.”

  “You think an apology is enough do you? You think that by telling me you were a dickhead and that you’ve realised that Mia is a grown up, that means I can trust you again? You think that means that I can believe that you can trust me? That I can believe that you ever trusted me? I know what you went through when your folks died, Alex. I know how much you sacrificed for your family, for Mia. If you think walking away from my brother and his sister, is the easiest thing in the world for me, then think again, arsehole.” I take a breath and a large gulp of beer. “Because, let me tell you, walking out of that house a week ago, was the single hardest thing I have EVER done. Walking away from the woman who has my heart in her hands, while she silently cries over the loss of both of us but hoping to keep our relationship in one piece because she knew how much we needed each other and not just in a business sense. THAT fucking killed me.” I take another deep breath and suck down the last of the beer, “But let me tell you something Alex, coming back, driving back in to this town and knowing, just knowing that I won’t be able to see you without seeing her, whether she’s there next to you or not, that breaks my fucking heart. So yes, I’m giving you my notice because looking at you only reminds me of everything I can't have. I’m giving you my notice, because I can't and don’t want to be friends with your sister. In order to save my own sanity, I have to walk away from both of you.”

  I stand up and throw the empty beer in the rubbish and rub my hands over my face. I can feel a week’s worth of stubble on my chin and I just can't find the energy to give a fuck. I don’t look back to the table before saying, “Alex, take your beer, your peace offering and get the fuck out of my house. I won’t leave you hanging at work but I don’t want to see you in my space again. I can't do it.”

  “What are you going to do now Dan?”

  “I’ll find another construction job, Alex.”

  “I didn’t mean about the job, Dan, I meant about Mia.”

  That startles me, I don’t want to hear her name spoken out loud ever again because it causes a shooting pain in my chest. “Nothing. She made her feelings pretty clear the other night and I’m giving her what she asked for, space. In order to do that, I need to make some space and this is the only way I can do it without having a mental breakdown.”

  “Are you going to let her know you’re home?”

  “Well I wasn’t going to let you know I was back until tomorrow, so I’m not sure, maybe. Goodbye Alex.”

  I don’t turn around to watch him leave but I can hear every one of his steps. I finally let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding, when I hear his car leave. I trudge upstairs, have a shower and then fall in to bed.

  What I don’t count on, is the fact that I haven’t washed the sheets since the last time Mia was here and she's all I can smell as I drift off in to an exhausted but restless sleep and dreams. The fucking dreams!

  MIA

  I haven’t heard from Dan since he told me he was leaving for a few days, maybe more. I don’t
think Alex has heard from him either, not that that should surprise me after everything that Alex said that night. Yup, it’s become ‘that night’, you know, the one that shall not be mentioned! Yet, it’s so significant it’s that night!

  I don’t know how to contact him except to text him. I could go by the house to see if he’s home but that seems kinda stalkerish and well, I don’t want to creep him out.

  I can't ask Alex and I can't go by the house on the off chance he's back, so I do the only thing left to me, text. I know I’m chickening out by not calling him but this way, he can choose his words, maybe?

  *Hey Robson, I just wanted to check in on you and see how you’re going*

  Nope, I delete that one, seems tooooo casual.

  *Hey Dan. I miss you*

  I delete that one too because even though it may be true, I can't say that to him, I don’t have that right anymore.

  *Hi Dan, I just wanted to check in, Mia*

  That one’s ok, right? I mean there aren’t any hidden meanings or questions, I’m just checking in on a friend to see how he is. Before I can second guess myself again, I hit send and wait. Then I wait some more. Maybe wherever he's staying is out of range, maybe he didn’t hear his phone or maybe he's asleep. It’s late afterall and I don’t fucking know, maybe he just doesn’t want to answer, I sent him away afterall but I didn’t mean for him to stay away, I just wanted breathing room that night and I know I wasn’t clear about that in retrospect but, I just want to hear his voice. I need to know that he's safe and that he's home, but I guess I lost that right a week ago and I don’t know how to get it back.

  I take my sorry arse to bed because the world hasn’t stopped just because I broke my own heart and I still have to get up and go to work tomorrow.

  I fall asleep, with my phone in my hand, waiting for it to vibrate with a message from Dan but it doesn’t come that night and when I wake up the next morning, I feel sad all over again.

  I don’t know whether the sadness come from my phone remaining silent or the realization that my bed is empty because my dreams feel so real!

  Chapter Eighteen

  DAN

  I wake up late the next morning mainly because I didn’t feel the need to set an alarm the night before. It’s not like I have anything to get up for. So, for the first time in a very long time, I slept in. I left my phone down in the kitchen on silent so that it couldn’t disturb my already disturbed mind and just slept.

  The only thing with waking up, is that I’ve got the same problems I had when I fell in to bed last night. It smells like a dream and it’s one I could do without. I can't lie here any longer, lingering on thoughts of other times and bliss filled sleepovers. I get up and strip the bed of its sheets and pillow cases. Anything that could have been touched or has even the slightest possibility of smelling like honey and spice, I can't deal with it anymore.

  Walking down the stairs, I almost trip arse over when I get tangled up in the bedding but I make it to the laundry and throw them in the washer. With that all sorted, I stroll in to the kitchen and start the coffee. I think this morning really calls for some strong coffee and as I stand there, staring at it brewing away, there's a knock on my door. You‘d think after that call from Alex and his impromptu visit last night that I’d be more cautious about who’s on the other side but nope. Apparently I haven’t learnt my lesson because I open the door without a second thought and Ally is standing on my doorstep.

  “Good morning Allycat, what can I do for you this morning?”

  “Good morning Dan, to start with you could put on some pants and well, maybe a shirt too?”

  ‘Oh fuck! I’m sorry Ally, I’ll be right back!” And I bolt for my bedroom. Holy shit! I forgot that all I had on were my boxer briefs. It’s my house and I can walk around it half naked if I so choose but answering the door in this state?

  “I’m so sorry Allycat, I’d forgotten that I hadn’t put clothes on yet. I just got out of bed after the long drive home last night.” I give her a sheepish grin and hope that she can forgive me. “So, what brings you here at this early hour of the day? Shouldn’t you be at the bakery about now?”

  “It’s lunchtime Dan, not early. I’m here to try and knock some damn sense in to you!”

  “So Alex sent you to do his dirty work did he?”

  “I didn’t come here for Alex, although we will be talking about THAT soon. Mainly, I came here to check in on you, see how you are and to ask you what your plans are now.”

  “Well, Ally, at this point I have to say, I plan on washing some dirty laundry, finishing my coffee and then I’ll have a shower. Once those things are completed, I’m going to the Jaxson’s to talk a few things through with Jack so he can continue the project and we’ll set up a time when the two of us can discuss the rest of the projects I had on my books.” I say as I pour myself and Ally a coffee. “After all that’s done, I plan on coming home, cooking myself some dinner and zoning out in front of the TV because I’m exhausted mentally and I’m choosing to not think about anything or anyone. If all of that is Ally approved, then I think I’m on to a winner!” I try for a charming smile but I know I’m not pulling that shit off right now. I don’t want to be charming, or happy and cheerful at the moment but for Ally, I’m trying because I like her and none of this is her fault.

  I’m sick to death of talking, it’s not getting me anywhere and at this point, I just want to move on, but I can’t bring myself to throw Ally out, even though that’s exactly what I wish I could do!

  So, here we sit. Looking at each other and waiting for the other one to say something but neither one of us giving up! I know she has an opinion, something to say, I’m just going to sit here and wait her out. I have stuff to do but I’ll wait her out for as long as I still have coffee.

  Ally cuts straight to the bones of the issue! “Dan, do you love her?”

  I swallow hard and think about how best to respond. No matter how I reply to this one, I feel like I’m going to come off looking like an arsehole.

  “Dan, if you do love Mia, why aren’t you fighting for her? Why aren’t you fighting for the two of you? You know Alex probably better than most of us, including me and you know that he didn’t mean any of the things he said and you also know that once he stops being a douche canoe, he will be happy about your relationship with Mia. He’s only mad because he feels like he was left out and lied to! I know he shouldn’t feel like that but he does. You both hurt him. Before you say anything, I know it was Mia’s decision not to tell her brother, that she wanted to see where the relationship would go before bringing him in to the equation but, you made choices too. You spoke to him every day and you didn’t even give him the slightest hint that you were seeing someone much less his sister. Now, I know I saw it happening but he wasn’t looking for it because he didn’t think of the two of you that way. Not because he thought you weren’t good enough but because he sees you as a brother, which makes Mia your sister in his head, even though we all know that’s not the case.” Ally takes a deep breath. “Look Dan, I know things didn’t go the way you wanted them to but facts are facts. I’m not excusing his behaviour believe me, I’ve told him many, many times over the last week just how much of a moron he is, but I also think that you have to take some of that blame off his shoulders. You stormed out of the house last week like your arse was on fire, and before you say shit about how Mia asked you, all of us, to leave, You. Don’t. Leave. You don’t leave her alone to deal with the fallout. IF you love her that is, Dan.”

  “Can I speak now, please?” She nods her head. “Alex isn’t the only one hurting here Ally. I know you love him, I know you guys fought for what you have and I get it. I know you both think that if I really, truly love Mia I would have stayed. Fought everyone, to be with her but the truth is, I love her so much that I had to walk away. I know she’ll still have the love and respect of her brother and a sister-in-law that will love her and be the family she craves. She doesn’t need me Allycat but she does need her
brother. He's the only family she has left and I will not allow her to sacrifice any of that for me. She can find another guy that will fit her better, someone that Alex will approve of without the argument. She can have the family she wants and needs. I don’t need to be here for her to have that.”

  “And what about you Dan, what do you need?” More of the tough questions from my favourite baker!

  “What I need Allycat, is to move on, move forward. Which is why, I resigned from my job with Alex and why I will distance myself from all of you.”

  “So at the first hurdle you’re walking away? From your best friend, the man you call your brother, your business partner? You’re going to walk away from Mia, the woman you claim to love because it’s all too hard. Is Alex’s response the excuse you needed to pull away? Was it all getting a bit too serious for you? Was monogamy killing you that much Dan? I really thought you were a better man quite honestly. I’ve fought for you and Mia but you ran away for a week and now you’ve come back from wherever the fuck you’ve been and you’re making decisions for everyone involved?”

  “Yes, Ally, I’ve made the tough decisions. I went away to think and I came back with the answers. I’d like you to leave now please. I have stuff to get done today so that I can move on with my life.”

  “I’m leaving Dan but not because you asked me to, I want to leave before I say or do something we’ll both regret. I really thought you loved her, loved her enough to fight for her, not give up at the first hurdle, but if that’s what you’re going to do Dan, make it fast and clean. Maybe you can't love her enough, in which case, you don’t deserve her.”

  I close the door behind Ally and bang my head against it multiple times. That’s just it isn’t it? If I loved Mia enough I’d fight for her wouldn’t I? I wouldn’t give a fuck about the rest of the world, including her god damned arsehole brother. I keep telling myself I love her so much that I’m walking away for her own good, because I refuse to be the reason she loses her brother. Is it the truth?