Bossing My Friend

by Suzanne Hart

  Now, I walked to it in my heels and my tight dress. I felt like a fool. Mona was right about everything. I’d dressed up like this to make him see that I was doing well. That I didn’t miss him.

  But he would see right through me. He always had.

  Mona was wrong about one thing. I didn’t know Jared at all. He was the one who knew me completely. And that was because I’d revealed myself to him. I should have known better.

  Jared

  When Elsie and I were teenagers, she used to shoplift cans of beer for us from the local gas station. She was well liked by everyone in town, unlike me, and nobody ever suspected her. She could walk straight out of a place with the cans in her pockets and nobody ever batted an eyelid.

  We’d take the beers to the lake and sit there for hours, talking.

  It was strange to think that now we’d be drinking in public, sitting together at a bar. I never had the chance of knowing Elsie as an adult and it made me feel strange.

  I was relieved when I got her text. Glad that she wasn’t blowing me off.

  I arrived at the bar way ahead of time and got us a quiet table in the corner. Away from the live band that was playing.

  Elsie was fifteen minutes late and I stood up when I saw her at the door. She looked different now…very different than she did in the morning. This evening, she’d put in an effort to dress up.

  Her cocktail dress was short and, in those heels, her legs looked long and slender. The dress fit her like a glove and I watched the way her hips swung as she walked. Her arms were bare. She’d left her hair open and she was even wearing makeup.

  Did she do this for me?

  I tried not to think that way. Tried to stop my mind from going there.

  Elsie approached me and I held out the chair for her.

  “I’m happy you could come,” I told her as she sat down. She hadn’t bothered with a greeting or a hug. Fair enough.

  She watched me closely as I took the chair across from her.

  “You look beautiful in that dress, Elsie,” I tried, but she didn’t accept the compliment.

  “You think I’ve changed?” I asked, smiling weakly at her and she gritted her teeth.

  “I’ve seen your face in papers and on TV over the years. I’ve watched you get old,” she told me, just as a waiter appeared.

  “I’ll have a dirty martini, please,” she placed her order, dragging her gaze away from me. I ordered a Scotch and turned to look at her again. Her small mouth was pursed. It was going to be difficult conversing with her like this.

  At this rate, I would never be able to bring up the job. I needed to try a different approach.

  “How about I give you an explanation for what happened ten years ago?” I tried.

  Elsie was glaring at me, and now she sat back in the chair.

  “You can try,” she said, and I nodded.

  “Okay, well, I had to leave in a hurry because I got the apprentice job I’d applied for in California,” I explained. Elsie narrowed her eyes at me.

  “And why didn’t I know about this job?” she asked.

  “I didn’t want to tell people because I didn’t think I’d get it.”

  “So, you’re telling me that I was just a part of the general public?”

  “No, Elsie, I didn’t want you to think any less of me. If I didn’t get the job, I would have been embarrassed,” I was speaking softly to her, hoping she would see the earnestness in my eyes.

  “And what about after? When you got to California. Why couldn’t you call me then? None of us had any idea where you were. Your parents were worried sick!” Elsie leaned over the table, she was hissing with anger.

  I nodded.

  “I know. I should have called someone, but I got caught up with work. I was new to that place. I didn’t know what I was doing. I didn’t think my parents would care,” I explained, and Elsie rolled her eyes away from me.

  “That was the problem with you, Jared. You always played the victim card. My dad is an alcoholic, my mom is having an affair. My parents don’t care about me. I’m just a rebel child making my way alone in the world. Bullshit!” Elsie barked. A couple of people turned to look at us from the other tables.

  I clenched my jaw and narrowed my eyes at her.

  “My father was an alcoholic and my mother had multiple affairs. I didn’t make up any of that,” I said, in a deep, growling voice.

  Elsie’s nostrils were flaring, and her cheeks were flamed. She crossed her arms over her heaving breasts and looked away from me.

  “I always cared, Jared. No matter what everyone else said about you, I stuck by you through everything.” Her voice had grown soft again.

  I couldn’t say anything to that. I knew she was right, but it was difficult for me to admit weakness. I drank my Scotch in silence and Elsie had her cocktail. I gestured to the waiter for another round and neither of us spoke till the second drinks arrived.

  “Elsie, I’m sorry,” I said, to break the cold silence between us. She snapped her head back to look at me.

  “That’s ten years too late!”

  “I know.”

  “You had ten years to call, to write a letter…to send word, anything! The first thing I heard about you was four years later in a news article. You were working for some big construction company. You were on their sales team. I had no idea how that even happened. How you got there!” Elsie’s softness had gone again.

  I couldn’t blame her. I never gave her a chance to vent before.

  “Why? Why did you just disappear, Jared? Why didn’t you ever get in touch with me?” Her voice was strained as she glared at me. The tip of her nose had reddened. Just the way it used to when she was about to cry.

  I didn’t want to make Elsie cry. That wasn’t why I was here.

  But how was I supposed to tell her the truth about my disappearance? I’d vowed to myself that she would never know. I didn’t want to spoil the memory of our friendship.

  Elsie

  Jared hadn’t really given me any answers. They were all excuses. I was growing pretty tired of them.

  I glared at him, hoping he would say something. Anything that would make sense.

  “The answer is very simple, Elsie. I don’t know why I never got in touch,” he finally replied.

  I could feel the rage bubbling up inside me, making my skin crawl. I shifted uncomfortably in my chair, before I emptied the second drink down my throat.

  “You don’t know why. Is that all you have to say?” I hissed, and Jared sighed.

  “I wish I knew the answer, Elsie. I just got caught up in my new life…I wasn’t thinking of Madison Green and what I left behind. I knew you were upset with me and I didn’t want a confrontation,” he replied.

  I could have slapped him. That would be one way of getting the rage out of my system.

  I didn’t do that, of course. No matter how badly I wanted to.

  We weren’t teenagers anymore, and Jared was a rich and powerful man.

  “I think I know why. You just didn’t think I was worth it. You had a new life and you didn’t want me to be a part of it,” I snapped at him.

  I could see Jared’s gray eyes darkening. There was a storm brewing behind them. I’d seen that look before. I’d witnessed his temper and his rage many times when we were growing up.

  The only thing that calmed him down back then, when he had these fits of rage, was me. I’d run away with him to the lake and we’d sit there and talk. I’d talk him through the anger, hold him back from breaking something. From getting into a fist fight with his dad.

  But I hadn’t seen him in ten years. All of that had changed. I wasn’t his punching bag anymore.

  “You don’t know what you’re talking about, Elsie,” Jared growled, and I rolled my eyes.

  “Our town was never good enough for you. Neither was I.” I knew I was echoing Mona’s words, but it was all true.

  “You’re being very dramatic right now, Elsie,” Jared scoffed, but as much as he tried
to be civilized, I could see the rage brewing. I was getting under his skin. He was going to explode any minute now.

  “I know I’m right. You ran away from Madison Green to get away from all of us. You have money now; you don’t need me. You can buy friends if you want, just like you bought that fancy fucking suit,” my voice was gravely in my throat. It hurt me to even say those words, but I felt he deserved them.

  Jared banged the whisky glass down on the table. It made my empty cocktail glass shiver. A few gasps rang out around us from other tables. His bang had attracted attention. Jared leaned over the table, narrowing his eyes at me.

  “You need to stop talking, right now!” he growled.

  His reaction was satisfying. He was angry. Good.

  Maybe now he might feel what I’d been feeling all these years. Pure rage.

  I sat back in my chair and looked at him with a half-smile.

  I’d forgotten how handsome he looked when his eyes had gone dark, when he was trying to control his anger. It made me feel victorious.

  “Did I hit a nerve?” I asked.

  He looked around at the people looking at us and settled back in his chair. I watched him pick up his glass again.

  “I thought we could come here and catch up as friends. I guess I was wrong. All you’re interested in is making accusations and feeling sorry for yourself,” Jared said. I watched the way he gulped his whisky. It passed down his wide throat and he licked his lips.

  How many nights had I stayed awake fantasizing about those lips? I gulped now, and the smile drooped on my face.

  “I think I’ve earned the right to feel angry,” I snapped.

  “Yes, you have. I apologized for my past actions. It was ten years ago, Elsie. Maybe we should move on.” He straightened the tie at his neck. I tracked his every movement. Nothing had changed. Jared always had the upper hand. He knew just what to say to make me fall under his spell.

  “Move on to what? What exactly do you think will happen now? We become friends again?” I hissed.

  Jared was watching me steadily, but he was breathing heavily too. I knew there was still some anger brimming under the surface.

  “We can’t be friends anymore, can we?” He said that sentence, rather than asked.

  I felt my heart drop to the pit of my stomach. I knew we couldn’t be friends. I knew I couldn’t forgive him. I just hated hearing those words coming from him.

  “As always, Jared, you know everything,” I remarked.

  Picking up my purse from the table, I stood up. Jared stared at me, narrowing his eyes angrily at me.

  “Where do you think you’re going? You just got here,” he growled. I pulled a few dollars out of my purse and slapped them down on the table.

  “Away from you. You never should have come to my office. Didn’t you know I never wanted to see you again?” I hissed and whipped around, away from him.

  I didn’t wait for a response. I had had enough. This time, I wasn’t going to let him break my heart. This time, I was going to be the one walking out on us.

  He wasn’t following me as I weaved around the tables and headed for the doors. This was probably the last time I’d see him in person. Good for me.

  I held my head high as I walked out. Just as long as I could hold back the tears till I got to the apartment, all would be okay.

  Jared

  I needed a minute. I knew Elsie had every right to be mad at me, but the things she’d said were downright ridiculous. I couldn’t get a hold of myself. I was angry enough to break something!

  Was she jealous of my success?

  How dare she say that I played the victim card?

  I watched her get up and leave and there wasn’t much I could do about it.

  She could leave if she wanted to.

  I had a reputation to maintain. I couldn’t just run after her and make a scene. I gripped the whisky glass tightly in my hand, tipping it over my mouth. I drank the very last drop of it and slammed it down again.

  Elsie was gone.

  Would I ever see her again? What about the job?

  I jumped up from the chair and ran after her. She’d been gone for several minutes now. I didn’t even know which direction she would have walked in. Had she taken a cab?

  I ran out of the bar and headed left, hoping I might see her. Chicago was busy and the streets were filled with people. But that turquoise colored cocktail dress stood out.

  I saw Elsie walking up ahead, with her head bowed down. Was she crying?

  I pushed past people, rushing to catch up with her.

  When I was directly behind her, I put a hand on her shoulder and forced her to turn to me. She gasped from the shock.

  “Elsie!” I growled, grabbing her by both shoulders now. She wasn’t crying yet but her nose was red and her eyes looked bleary. A few more moments and she’d have broken down.

  “Jared…I…” she was trying to say something but I pulled her into my arms.

  I’d failed to hug her before I left town ten years ago. If she was going to walk out on me now, I wasn’t letting her go without a hug.

  Elsie was warm pressed up against me. I hugged her tightly. She wrapped her arms around me and I was grateful for that. It didn’t feel strange to hug her again. Somehow it felt natural. Like no time had passed since we last hugged.

  Her hair was on my face now, and I breathed in deeply. I could feel her heart beating against my chest. Her breasts were squeezed up to me. I could feel the shape of her beautiful body. Even though I’d stopped thinking about her these past few years, she still appeared in my dreams.

  They were the same fantasies over and over again. Elsie, naked, lying next to me in bed. In my old family home in Madison Green. Elsie’s limbs entwined with mine. My fingers trailing over her smooth, long legs.

  I felt dazed as I held her now. Gently, she pulled herself from me. Her blue eyes were sparkling as she looked up at me. Her hair was ruffled from the hug. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever set my eyes on.

  “Take care of yourself, Jared,” she said.

  She was going to go.

  “Elsie, come back with me. Let’s have another drink. We could talk,” I pleaded with her and she breathed in and shook her head.

  “I can’t, not unless you answer me honestly. I need to know why you never called,” her voice was gentle as she spoke. She wasn’t being aggressive now. She just wanted answers I couldn’t give her.

  “I don’t know why,” I told her.

  She pressed her eyes close, like she was trying to hold back the tears.

  “Then I have to go,” she said and tugged herself away from me. I was still holding her hand and I pulled her back. She fell on my chest, slowly looking up at me, her lips just parted.

  I knew I shouldn’t have done it, but I couldn’t help myself.

  I leaned towards her and grazed my lips to hers. Elsie gasped, but she didn’t pull away. I parted her mouth with my tongue, leaning deeper into her, and I slid my tongue in.

  In the twenty years we’d known each other—this was the first time I was kissing her. I thought she’d be angry. She wasn’t. Instead, she kissed me back.

  Our breaths mingled and my arms wrapped around her waist. She was kissing me back as forcefully as I was kissing her. I’d fantasized about this moment for decades and it was finally happening. Now, when I was thirty years old. After all these years of wanting it, this was the best kiss I had ever had. Because it was with her. Nothing else would ever compare to it.

  My hands travelled up her back, seeking out the nape of her neck. Her hands were on my chest. She wrapped my tie around one wrist, pulling me closer to herself so she could kiss me better. I stroked her nape, weaved my fingers into her hair. This kiss was getting wild, getting out of hand.

  Elsie finally pulled her mouth away from me. She was breathless. Her cheeks were flushed pink and her blue eyes were shining.

  “Elsie…” I tried to find the words to say. Should I be apologizing?


  “My apartment is one more block away,” she interrupted me. I crossed my brows as I stared at her. What was she saying?

  “We’re practically strangers to each other now, right?” she asked and smiled weakly at me.

  In that moment, I would have agreed to anything she suggested.

  “I guess we are,” I told her.

  A film of darkness passed over her eyes for a moment, but then it was gone. She turned on her heels and started walking in the other direction. I had no other choice but to follow her.

  This was actually happening. Elsie Carr was taking me back to her place.

  Elsie

  I brought Jared to my apartment. Everything about that was wrong. But he’d kissed me and I’d kissed him back. After that, everything changed. I had wanted him for so long. My biggest fantasy was coming true and I couldn’t just give it up.

  Jared followed me in and I shut the door behind him. I couldn’t even look him in the eyes. I was embarrassed and shy. Kissing was a line we’d crossed. Even though we hadn’t seen each other in ten years, it felt like we could never go back to being just friends now.

  “So this is where you live?” Jared broke the awkward silence between us.

  I watched him walk to the window of my living room and look outside. My apartment was decent, nothing fancy. I didn’t care about where I lived, just like I didn’t care about what I wore. However, I was worried now about what Jared thought.

  Why did I care so much?

  It was obvious he didn’t care about me. He hadn’t thought of me in ten years.

  He turned to me when I didn’t say anything.

  “I wasn’t expecting this, Elsie,” his eyes had darkened again. I watched him speak. Those irresistibly sexy lips. I was kissing them just a few minutes ago.

  “Neither was I…but here we are,” I said.

  I could feel those teenage waves of desire coursing through my veins again. I’d touched myself so many times thinking about him. Now I might see him naked. I might see his…