Exception to the Rules
Page 15
She’d wounded him, which hadn’t been her intent, but now that it was done, the impact was in full effect. Then again, maybe she had intended to hurt Bas, to take it all back to where they started out. She wanted to go back to the beginning, to put a stop to all of the madness before she’d become spellbound, specifically before things had become sexual. However, some things couldn’t be reversed, couldn’t be ignored.
Gaea looked over at Bas, lingering by the bar, fidgeting with his drink. He’d had a few, more than was probably reasonable, but she wasn’t going to say anything. He’d obeyed her request, and he’d totally backed off until Arnold had appeared. Then it was as if nothing had changed. Bas had become attentive, doting, protective. She had to admit it had felt wonderful, which undoubtedly, was the issue.
She’d felt so certain about her plan, to see Bas every other month or so. It still felt as though that was the way to handle it. But talking to Kallie earlier had made Gaea doubt herself, and she wasn’t even sure why. The only way her plan was going to work was if she and Bas kept their expectation low and realistic. The sole focus had to be on sex. She didn’t need anything more complicated than that. As a matter of fact, she wasn’t certain at this point that she could handle that.
Gaea did know why, but sex always seemed to be more than sex for women. Men usually were able to keep themselves emotionally detached, but women desired more. Love, commitment, romance, security, a happily-ever-after. Why? Why wasn’t it okay to want physical pleasure and that’s it?
It would be enough for her, but only if there was no hope for anything else. No motives, no expectations, no intentions. All of her focus needed to be on work, and her creativity, too. She wanted to make it to the top of an extremely cutthroat market, and to do that she needed concentration, concentration, concentration.
How could she do that when she was concerned about his feelings being hurt? Maybe if she just talked things out with him, explained it to him like the business proposition she had in mind, he’d be in agreement, and they wouldn’t have to continue to go through this emotional hoopla. It was too tiring. And too confusing.
She just wouldn’t worry about him or their current situation anymore tonight. Tomorrow, when they had some time alone, she’d lay out the rules she wanted to play by and see if he would agree to it.
“Hi, Bas. Are you okay?”
He looked up from his drink to see Kallie standing to his right, so pretty in her coral silk chiffon dress stopping just above dainty feminine knees.
“I’m good,” he responded.
“Uh, not that we know each other very well or anything, but I think you just told me a whopper.”
Bas had to smile. They hadn’t spent a lot of time in each other’s presence, but when they did, he was entertained by the way she spoke. “Not a whopper. Just a half truth.”
“Which part?”
“Everything before the period.”
“Interesting. Anything you want to talk about?”
“Not really.”
“Um, okay.”
“Then again, maybe you can help me.”
She moved closer to him, placing her right foot on the rail, her left elbow on the bar, copying his stance exactly. “I’ll try my best.”
“What is it with you women?”
Both of her eyebrows rose high on her forehead and she pressed her lips together, but at least she refrained from laughing. “Well, I’m not sure. Can you be a little more specific?”
He sipped his beer, shocked yet again that he wasn’t more intoxicated. Usually three was his limit, on a bad night, four. This was his fifth beer. Yet he was still frustratingly sober.
“Get more specific? Okay then. How about this? Why do women think it’s completely okay to change their minds every other second? First it’s no, then it’s yes, then it’s maybe, then back to yes, then hell no. Are you starting to get the point or shall I continue?”
“No, you’ve done a good job,” Kallie murmured, nodding so that her loose hair moved wildly. “I know that pattern.”
“Oh? So what’s with that? Why can’t yes just mean yes?”
“Sometimes it does.”
“Not when it comes to women.”
She smiled. “It does.”
“It does? When exactly does that happen? What the hell does it take to make a woman mean what she says? I don’t understand it.”
Kallie patted his arm. “It must be discouraging. But it’s not personal.”
“It sure as hell feels that way.”
“Personal is typically when she says no and means no.”
“Are you saying rejection is final?”
“Yes and no.”
“Yes and no? Isn’t that what led to my question?”
Kallie chuckled. “Yes, but I have new insight for you that will hopefully make it easier for you to understand.”
“I’m not trying to make it easier for me to understand. I’m trying to get—” Bas stopped, not wanting to give too much away about the situation. He was still working for Kallie’s boss.
“Let’s put it this way, it’s sort of complicated when you’re talking about…these things. Because with…these things, there are a lot of components to consider. When women do say yes, they typically mean yes permanently, so there aren’t many offhand yeses. And on occasion, a woman can think she is saying yes to one thing and then realize it’s a completely different thing she’s said yes to, and then she isn’t certain about the yes, so that’s when the maybe comes into play. But the no, that’s usually pretty clear, except when the no is because the woman is scared about a new situation, and she says no, but that doesn’t really mean no, it’s mainly a maybe, but the man, he needs to give her time to see that there’s nothing to be frightened of, and that she won’t ruin her career because she falls in love.”
Bas blinked several times. Surprisingly, he understood everything Kallie had said, especially that last part. “Okay, so let’s say that a man figures out the part about being scared, and he makes concessions for that, which seem to work, but not really. Then what?”
“You keep trying,” she responded, in a tone that indicated he should have known that without asking.
“But when is it dumb for a man to keep trying? How does a man know when no is no and yes is yes?”
“Are you sure you want to know?”
“Of course. Banging my head against a brick wall is not my idea of fun.”
The corner of her mouth twitched, but she didn’t laugh. “There is a yes that when you hear it, you know that it’s a forever yes. It’s different from a maybe yes, and definitely different from a no yes.”
He looked at the half empty beer bottle in his hands. Maybe he was drunk. “Are you certain about this?”
“Positively. So don’t fret about it. It takes a little time to get to the forever yes.”
Most assuredly, he’d never experienced the wealth of sensations that he felt when making love to Gaea. And when they talked, there was a naturalness to the conversations. He felt more comfortable with her, wanted to get to know more about her.
Maybe giving her some space was the right thing. Damn it to hell, this was insane! He’d never beat around the bush like this, not over a woman. Not over anything for that matter. If his Seal buddies could see him right now, they’d definitely have a good laugh at his expense.
The most interesting thing was that he no longer wanted to find out what women wanted. Bas only wanted to figure out what one specific woman wanted. Now he had to come up with a plan of action to do just that.
At a quarter till one, Gaea was ready to call it a night. Because this wasn’t officially her gig, she didn’t have to stay until the awful end.
Arnold had lingered when she said goodnight and Bas had been right there, of course, being charismatic, mannerly, gallant. All the things she could hope for in a date, fake or not.
They walked to the exit, arm in arm, smiling, their bodies touching with each step. She felt the same spark of exc
itement that had been consistent since that first day. It was as if when they touched, they connected. Two parts making a whole. No one else did it to her. She’d never known it was possible.
They reached the curb and got in line to wait for their car to arrive. She turned to him. “What do you like about me?” she asked.
The question noticeably took him by surprise. “Is this a trick question? A test?”
“No. Think of it as research. So tell me, what do you find attractive?”
“There are quite a few things.”
“Name three?”
“Just three? Okay,” Bas said, dragging the word out. “Let’s see…”
“Nothing? You can’t come up with three?”
“Oh, no. Man, no. I just need a second to get my thoughts together. Your questions came out of left field. Caught me off guard is all.”
“And it can’t be about sex.”
His face fell. “It can’t?”
She nudged him with her elbow. “I can’t believe you.”
“Come on now. You know I’m kidding. You’re…”
She stepped back, waiting.
He touched her cheek with the back of his hand and his expression softened. “I like your passion, your ambition. You’re frank, and you make no qualms about who you are and what you want to achieve. You definitely come up with innovative solutions to your problems.” He nodded toward the restaurant. “This entire fashion campaign is ingenious.”
Gaea frowned. “That’s it?”
Bas laughed. “That’s it? I’ve just described an awesome woman.”
“But what about me?”
“I don’t understand.”
She turned away, perturbed by the unexpected rush of tears. “I’d like to think I’m funny. That I’m friendly. You know, human characteristics.”
“Oh, Gaea,” he whispered as he drew her into his arms. “Of course you’re all those things. Friendly, and you have a great sense of humor, and so much more. Kallie idolizes you and wants to be just like you. I’ve noticed how people talk to you, with admiration, with easiness. You don’t terrify people. You make them feel relaxed and accepted. Even that first time we met at the bar, you were so willing to agree to my crazy research plan. Willing to open yourself up to a stranger. Don’t you see how extraordinary that is?”
Her head rested on his chest, but she shook it anyway. “I was so nasty to you tonight. I’m sorry.”
“Apology accepted. I know you were just being honest for what you felt at that moment.”
“I know, but it’s not your fault. You’ve never pressured me, or made any unreasonable demands.”
“Actually, I’m quite sure I have. And I’m going to make even more. I think its best we go back to our original plan. I keep Arnold from hovering and ask you questions whenever time permits. You focus on getting through this campaign with your strength and energy, and you answer my questions. I’ll do whatever I can to assist. If that means giving you your space, fine. Just tell me and it shall be.”
Gaea lifted her head to meet his gaze. Astonished once more at this peculiar, wonderful man. Different from anyone she’d ever met, and yet she felt as if she’d known him for an incredibly long time. She went up on her toes, stretched her neck, but she couldn’t reach him. Bas smiled slowly and leaned down until his lips touched hers.
The shock of his kiss swamped her again, and for once in her life, she shut off the part of her brain that dissected everything, contemplated every move. She just kissed him. A man, a woman, a luminescent kiss.
The ride back to the hotel was quiet, full of contentment with just touching. Bas had meant what he said, that he would back off, not make this more complex than it needed to be. Gaea had enough to deal with without him adding to it.
There would be time, perhaps after this campaign was over, to examine the passion, the link he felt with her. For now, he would be grateful for what he had and not ask for more. Once inside their room, he led her to the bedroom, then shut the door behind her. Knowing she would be out shortly, he undressed quickly in the bathroom, brushed his teeth, and cleared out. She quietly walked by as he made the couch into his bed.
Despite his good deed, it wasn’t fun when she whispered, “good night,” and closed the bedroom door behind her.
But it was best this way. He needed to figure out what he wanted, and so did she. The sex, while extraordinary, made things muddled and challenging.
He turned off the lights and climbed into bed. Sliding his hands behind his head, he looked up at the ceiling for a long time, seeing nothing in the dark. His thoughts swirled in circles, always going back to being inside her. Why was it so different? She wasn’t uniquely built. She hadn’t come up with some unusual and unrestrained technique. Yet with her it was…
Damn it. He didn’t know what it was. Excellent didn’t begin to describe it. It changed him. How, he couldn’t describe. But it was true nonetheless. If it was still so after this campaign was over, then he could take the time to fully examine the reasons. As for now, he had to forget about making love to her. If that was possible. It was definitely asking a lot.
He closed his eyes, needing to sleep, knowing sleep was going to be difficult. But he tried.
The minutes ticked by, the night grew long and still. He listened to the sound of his own heartbeat, trying to slow down his thoughts, but having no success.
Then he heard a slight sound. The bedroom door opened. The little progress he’d made in his brain was shot to hell as his hopes rose. Gaea was probably just going to the bathroom, nothing more. Besides, hadn’t he just come to the conclusion that he needed to step back? Put sex on hold?
Her footsteps were muted by the thick carpet, and he couldn’t place her in the room. That is until he saw her shadow on the wall.
Bas turned his head, and there she was, made luminous by the moonlight. She approached the bed slowly, quietly, until she stood right next to it.
He could hardly make out her expression, but it was enough. Troubled. In fact, she was chewing on her lower lip.
Bas tossed back the covers. Gaea sat down, causing the mattress to conform to her body.
“I’m sorry. I couldn’t sleep,” she mumbled.
“Lie down.”
“You said we shouldn’t.”
“I know.”
“I said we shouldn’t.”
He grinned, knowing she couldn’t see him. “I know.”
“But I’m here.”
He reached out with his hand, grabbed hers, and squeezed. “Come here,” he said.
“Are you sure?”
“Not at all.”
“What if this is a big mistake?”
He gave her a little tug. “Then we’ll make it together.”
Gaea nodded, then slowly lay down next to Bas. He closed his eyes, painfully aware of the softness of her skin, of the way her lush hip felt against his, of her closeness, her scent.
“You know there’s a little problem with your research plan,” she stated.
“What’s that?”
“The basis. How can you hope to understand women when we don’t understand ourselves?”
He rolled over onto his side, and looked down into her veiled face. “I don’t believe that. I think you have figured out all the mysteries in the universe. That you know all the secrets of the heart. You just have to listen to your own good reason. That’s all.”
Gaea’s hand traveled up to the back of his neck. “Is this the smart thing to do?”
He answered by lowering his head to press his lips to hers.
Chapter Sixteen
The instant their lips touched, Gaea’s apprehension faded away, and she was right where she wanted to be.
His hand moved to her belt, which he opened effortlessly, then he reached inside to caress her bare flesh. It felt as if he belonged there, as if without his touch, it was lacking.
Everything that had bothered her became unimportant as she explored his mouth, his taste, as he massaged he
r stomach with complete admiration and enthusiasm.
As for her, she had her own task to focus on. Getting him undressed was first on the list. She reached for his boxers and pulled them down, but was only able to get the material so far. Murmuring a soft apology, he left her momentarily while he took his shorts off, and while he was in perfect position, he spread her robe completely. A second later, a foil packet landed by her head on the bed, and then he lay down again to cover her, flesh to flesh.
He lowered his head until he kissed her once more, but only a peck. Angling his mouth so he could nibble the edge of her chin, he whispered, “I can’t figure this out. How I can feel this way when…”
“I know,” she responded. “It’s insane. But, oh boy.”
“Yes. Exactly.” He licked, then nibbled, then moved to her neck, kissing, uttering sweet sounds that made no sense, just the heat of his breath, the wet of his tongue, the sharpness of his teeth.
Distraction occurred when he cupped her breast, using the flat of his palm to circle her nipple, brushing against it so lightly it was as if she imagined the caress.
Every cell in her being wanted more. “Please,” she begged, pressing herself into his hand. “Don’t make me wait.”
He lifted his head and looked down at her. It was too dark and his face too shadowed to see him clearly, but the length of his pause made her think he could see her.
Bas remained silent as he reached for the protection. Once he had it on, he moved on top of her, spreading her thighs with his knees to settle between them. Once nestled, he reached for her hands and slid his fingers between hers. He raised both her hands until they were above her head, brought them both together, then using one hand, so much larger than hers, he grabbed both wrists tightly. When she tugged, he held her quickly, stationary.
“Hey now. What—”
His low chuckle did all sorts of interesting things to her body. She tried to move, but the way he held her captive, she could hardly wiggle.
Spreading her legs even further, he touched her with his free hand, and after stroking her a few times, he thrust a finger inside, making her gasp with the unexpected entry. The next instant his mouth covered hers, muting the sound as his finger pushed inside her.