Haven

by Jessica Jarman

  “Why?” Drew asked.

  Noah glanced at Chloe who remained stubbornly quiet and sight again. “We don’t want to see either of you hurt.”

  “Ah, the concern is for me, too, is it?” He laughed humorlessly. “Here I thought you were just worried I was being an ass to sweet Katie.”

  “You are being an ass,” Chloe hissed.

  “So much for loyalty lying with me.”

  “It isn’t about loyalty,” she protested. “I love you, more than life, but I’m always going to call you out on things that aren’t right. You’re treating her like—”

  “Like what?” he snapped. “What am I doing that isn’t ‘right’, Chloe?”

  “You start a relationship and within a day, she’s having to ask permission to be done with a meal? Or go on the trap line with the others! What else does she have to ask you for, to go to the bathroom?”

  “Do you really want to know the answer to that?” He smirked, though her judgmental tone was grating on him.

  “Not really,” Jack muttered.

  Chloe shot him an irritated look before turning back to Drew. “Katie is so sweet and loving; she’s going to go along with whatever you want without any thought to herself. She’s never been in a relationship or on her own. She’s always had someone to take care of her. So you sweeping in and taking on that role is naturally appealing to her. And that may work for a while, but eventually… I don’t want to see either of you hurt or unhappy. Can you honestly tell me you are going to be satisfied with that long term? I don’t believe it. Not when you’ve been involved with such strong women in the past—Cara, Charlotte.”

  “She’s not weak,” he said softly, anger flaring. His sister’s words were too close to what Katie had thought about herself, and that was unacceptable to him.

  “What?” Chloe frowned.

  Jack straightened and looked at Drew intently.

  “She is not weak,” he repeated slowly. “She is stronger than you can even imagine.”

  “I’m not saying she’s weak,” Chloe protested.

  “Then what are you saying?” he demanded.

  “She’s…fragile. When she first came here, she hardly let anyone touch her and cringed away if you even tried,” she said. “She’s also inexperienced and has no idea how to be in a relationship.”

  “So what would you recommend? Should I sit and wait while she fucks her way through the guys at the farm? Would she be experienced enough then?” he spat.

  “No! Why are you misinterpreting everything I say?” she cried.

  “Because I don’t get what your problem is!” he shouted.

  “And I don’t get how you can treat a woman, especially Katie, like she’s a thing!” she yelled back.

  “A thing? You really have that low an opinion of me?” His chest hurt, physically ached that she thought so little of him.

  Chloe threw her hands up in the air. “She was sitting at your feet like a dog last night, and jumped because you said it was bedtime.”

  “Chloe,” Jack said sharply.

  “What?” She turned to her partner. “You can’t tell me you didn’t notice that!”

  “I wouldn’t equate it with a dog,” he insisted. “And you didn’t either the thousands of times she did the same thing in the past, before they were lovers. Chloe, if Grace had done the same thing with Ethan or Noah, would you?”

  Chloe frowned.

  “Of course you wouldn’t.” He reached over and took her hand. “Sweetheart, it’s always been like this with them. Think about it. They take care of each other, give each other what they need. It’s just gone to the next level.”

  She shook her head. “I don’t think—”

  “It’s always been Katie for me, Chloe,” Drew interrupted. “Since the day we found these guys in the woods. She’s been mine, and I’m hers. I fought it for so damned long because I was afraid, but it killed me. Being apart killed me, and she was suffering, too. And when she first came here, she had no problem with my touch. She never cringed away from me. Why can’t you just accept that we need to be together?”

  “Why can’t you be with her without bringing your…deviant kinks into it?

  His jaw dropped open and he gaped at her a moment before pulling himself back together. “Are you fucking kidding me? You’re going to sit there and lecture me on being outside the norm? Whose baby are you carrying again?”

  Noah held his hands up. “Come on, Drew.”

  “No!” He shoved his hands through his hair. “The hypocrisy here is staggering. I have never said a word ever about the fact two men are fucking my sister at the same time, and that that is what she chose for her life.”

  Paling, Chloe shook her head, but before she, or the men, could speak, Drew continued.

  “And do you know why? Because as much as I love you, it’s not my business. Just like it’s not your business that I get off on being in control, and frankly—and this is something that never entered your closed little mind—she gets off on giving me control. I like taking care of her and she likes being cared for.”

  “And if she decided that wasn’t something she wanted anymore?” Chloe asked quietly.

  “That would be between the two of us, but it wouldn’t change how I feel about her. I’ve loved her since I was seventeen years old, Chloe. I’m finally able to show her that, after years of being idiotic. I don’t want to have to fight anyone to do that, especially not my sister.”

  “Drew,” Chloe said, her lips trembling and her eyes filling.

  He walked to the table, placed his palms on the surface and leaned down to meet her eyes. “I’m not ashamed of how I feel or what Katie and I do together, but your opinion matters, Chloe, to me and to Katie. I won’t have you making her feel like something’s wrong with her or she’s weak because you don’t understand what we have.”

  She reached out and touched one of his hands, tears rolling down her cheeks.

  “I love you, Chlo, but don’t ask me to change because you don’t get it. Katie’s the only one who has the right to ask me to change anything.” He squeezed her hand before straightening and walking out the door.

  Katie braced herself before going into Drew’s cabin. While she’d enjoyed the morning with Grace, Ethan and Noah, her mind had been on Drew and what was probably going on with his sister. Chloe hadn’t been in the main cabin when they’d returned, so Katie had no idea what to expect. With a deep breath, she opened the door and walked in. Drew was seated on the bed, back against the headboard, staring at the wall.

  “Hi,” she said quietly, shutting the door behind her.

  “Hi,” he said, exhaustion dripping off that one little word.

  “That bad?”

  “Well, my sister thinks my deviant ass is corrupting you and we’re destined to crash and burn because of it, so yeah, it was that bad.”

  She cringed. “Ouch.”

  “Yeah, apparently, my kinky ways are going to destroy us.”

  She couldn’t help it; she laughed. Covering her mouth, she tried hard to keep it in, but soon Drew’s lips were twitching up into a smile.

  She dropped her hand and asked, “Did my kinky ways make their way into the conversation?”

  “No, you keep those well hidden.” He chuckled.

  “Will it make you feel better if I tell you I don’t regret a single thing we’ve done? That you haven’t done anything that freaks me out or makes me want to end things?”

  “Maybe a little,” he admitted.

  “I like what we have,” she said confidently. “I feel safe and cared for and complete. I used to feel so empty, Drew. So empty I ached from it. You’re the only one who’s ever been able to keep me from feeling that. Everything you do fills me up.” She walked over to the table, bent at the waist and braced her hands on the surface. Looking over her shoulder, she added, “Even knowing you need to discipline me sometimes, remind me of who’s in control, fills me up.”

  His eyes darkened and he got off the bed, prowli
ng across the room. “Face forward,” he choked out.

  “Yes, sir.” She turned and stared at the tabletop. Content that the hurt, lost look was banished from his face.

  He ran his palms up the backs of her thighs, pushing her skirt up to waist. “Did you think of me while you were gone?”

  “Yes,” she sighed. “Every step I took, every wet slide between my legs, reminded me of you.”

  He slipped his hand between her legs and hummed when his fingers slid through the seed he’d painted her with earlier, still damp and slick from her body heat.

  “Who do you belong to?” he whispered.

  “You. Always you.”

  Bringing both hands to her ass, he kneaded the globes roughly. “And who do your orgasms belong to?”

  “You, sir. I’m sorry I came without permission,” she said sincerely as her heart beat frantically.

  “Hmmm.” His movement stilled. “Are you ready to take your punishment now?”

  She closed her eyes and let her head fall forward. “If it pleases you.”

  “It does,” he murmured. “Would you like me to fuck you afterwards?”

  A shiver raced through her. “Yes, please.”

  “Even if I don’t give you permission?” he asked curiously.

  “Yes,” she gasped.

  “Very well.” He shifted one hand to the small of her back as he moved to the side until his groin brushed her hip. “You’ll count for me.”

  “Yes, sir.” She held her breath, waiting for the first strike. And it didn’t come. She frowned and released a long sigh. Slap. “Oh, God!”

  “What was that?”

  “One…one!” She panted at the sting, knowing it was only going to spread and intensify with each blow.

  Slap. “Two.”

  Slap. “Th-three.” Her breath hitched. That one had more power behind it, and she pushed back against his hand, which still rested on her hot flesh. She needed him to know she wanted this, wanted everything he gave her, that she could take it.

  Drew moaned and ground his hard length against her hip. Slap.

  “Four.” She squeezed her thighs together, and her clit pulsed.

  “Ask me to finish it,” he groaned.

  “Please, sir, I need it,” she begged. “Slap me then fuck me. I need you inside me. Please.”

  Slap.

  “Five. Thank you.” She sniffled as he pulled her up and turned her to face him. “Thank you.”

  Drew let her go to undo his jeans and shove them and his shorts down to his knees. Then, he took a step back so he could sit in the chair behind him.

  “I want you to ride me.” Drew reached out, palm up, and she accepted it without hesitation.

  Katie straddled his lap, reached between them to grasp his cock and lowered herself, accepting him into her snug heat. When he was seated fully inside her, she settled her hands on his shoulders and began to move.

  Drew pushed up, meeting her strokes. “You’re the best damned thing that’s ever happened to me.”

  “You, too,” she gasped. “Be lost without you.”

  “Harder,” he commanded and nearly went blind when she slammed down then circled her hips slightly before raising back up. “Fuuuck.”

  She maintained the fast, brutal pace until her hands began to shake. Drew opened his eyes—when the hell had he closed them—and saw an intense look of concentration on her face even as she continued to fuck him.

  He lifted a hand to palm her flushed cheek. “Don’t ask. Do not come unless I say so.”

  “I know, I know.” Her rhythm faltered slightly. “I know, I know, I…”

  “Good girl,” he grunted. “That’s it; you can do it, baby. Just hold on.”

  She bit her lip as he bent his head and latched on to her neck, sucking hard.

  She stopped moving altogether, pulling on his hair. “Drew, please.”

  He licked the bruise forming then nibbled a line to her shoulder. “I didn’t tell you to stop. Keep moving.”

  “But Drew…”

  He lifted his head and met her gaze. “Keep fucking me, Katie.”

  With a sob, she lifted up and began to move again. Her nails dug into his shoulders, and he could see her struggling not to come. The desperation on her face was beautiful. Each harsh breath and movement she made pushed him closer to his release. He knew she’d hold on; she wouldn’t come. She was so fucking strong; she’d do it for him. And knowing that was enough for him.

  He leaned close and licked the shell of her ear, relishing the way her muscles quivered in response. “Who do you belong to?” he whispered.

  “You,” she said breathlessly.

  “Yessssss,” he hissed as his balls tightened and desire pooled hotly in his belly. He wasn’t going to last, and he wanted her to come apart before he filled her up and put her back together again. “I love you.”

  Her head whipped back, and she searched his face. “You… Oh, God.”

  “I love you.” He dropped his hands to her hips and took over, lifting her up and down, shoving into her frantically. “Loved you since that first day. You’re mine, but baby, I’ve always been yours. Always.” He clenched his teeth together and ground out, “Come.”

  Her scream rent the air and her walls squeezed him, pulling him into the abyss with her. He continued to piston into her spasming sheath, filling her to overflowing and pushing her higher and higher until she quaked in his arms.

  Wrapping his arms tightly around her, Drew held on as they both came down and their breathing slowed. When her body went limp in his lap, he slipped out of her and stood with her in his arms. Constricted by his fucking pants around his knees, he shuffled over to the bed and set her down gently. Yanking his jeans up, he left them undone as he walked to the shelf above the table and grabbed what he was looking for.

  Katie was watching him, curiosity bright in her eyes, as he walked back to her. He sat beside her and searched his mind for the right words to speak.

  “I love you,” he said again. “If it were the world we were born into, I’d get down on one knee and beg you to marry me. But it isn’t. I don’t even have a ring or anything. All I have is this.” He held out the piece of leather nervously and was ridiculously pleased when her eyes lit up.

  “The cuff your grandfather made you? I haven’t seen you wear this in years.” She traced a fingertip along the initials burned into the center of the band—A.C.

  “Didn’t fit anymore.” He shrugged. “It’s one of the few possessions I have that means anything to me, and I want you to wear it. To show you’re mine and to show my love.”

  Eyes shining, she held out her hand. He beamed and wrapped it around her wrist, snapping it closed. He then lifted her hand and bussed her palm.

  “I love you, Katie.”

  “And I love you, Drew. Always have. I can’t do without you,” she whispered through her tears.

  “And you’ll never have to,” he vowed.

  * * * *

  Katie was helping with dinner, humming as she stirred a pot of beans. The house was full of chatter as the table was being set and people were washing up for the meal. Chloe came to stand beside her, and Katie stiffened slightly, wondering what the other woman had to say, not wanting to deal with conflict right now.

  “I owe you an apology,” Chloe said quietly.

  “Oh?” Katie looked up in surprise.

  Chloe’s cheeks were pink and she nodded. “After talking with Drew and then the guys, I realize I jumped to conclusions—unfair ones—and was, to be honest, hypocritical and judgmental. Something neither you nor my brother deserve.”

  “Thank you.”

  “I hope you and Drew can forgive me. My only defense is I love you both so stinking much that I got carried away.” Chloe shrugged. “Not much of a defense, I know, but there it is.”

  “I love you, too. And I love Drew more than you can imagine.” Katie reached over and grasped Chloe’s hand tightly. “All’s forgiven. But please know this is what I wa
nt. Drew is what I want.”

  Tears clung to Chloe’s lashes, and she stared down at Katie’s wrist. “He gave you his cuff?”

  “Oh, yeah. This afternoon.” She smiled as she looked at the dark leather against her skin.

  “He loves that thing. Didn’t take it off from the day Grandpa gave it to him until the day he couldn’t snap it around his wrist. I used to have to fight him to take it off for a bath.” Chloe laughed.

  “He loves me,” Katie said confidently. “He wanted to give me something to show that.”

  “Very appropriate,” Chloe said, sniffling a bit. “Oh, for crying out loud, put me out of my misery and hug me already.”

  Katie laughed and threw her arms around the other woman’s shoulders, holding her close. Across the room, she saw Drew watching them, a soft smile brightening his face. She closed her eyes and held on for another minute. They were going to be okay. All of them.

  Chapter Nine

  The time had come for Kyle, Matt and Erik to return to the farm. As decided before, Charlotte was staying on until the baby came—another month or so. Katie was fine with that. Despite her earlier resentment of the woman, it was hard to hold onto it when Drew was clearly besotted with Katie, and Charlotte was making every effort to be friends with her. Periodically, a bit of awkwardness would creep in but for the most part, it dissipated quickly, and they moved on.

  As everyone gathered for breakfast—they were sending the men off with full bellies—Kyle approached Katie.

  “Could I talk to you for a minute?” He jerked his head toward the door. “In private.”

  “Sure,” she said, glancing at Drew who was talking with the other men at the table before following Kyle.

  They walked toward the river and stopped at the top of the bank. She shoved her hands into the pockets of her worn jeans and waited.

  “I think you should come with us,” he said abruptly.

  Katie flinched. “Excuse me?”

  “To the farm. There’s plenty of room and you can spend the winter there,” he said with a broad smile.

  “I’m sorry, but I’m quite happy here,” she said.

  “No, you’re not,” he argued.

  “Excuse me?” she said again, shaking her head.