Guilty as Sin

by Jami Alden

  “Shh, it’s okay. I’ve got you now,” Tommy said.

  Instinctively she tried to sit up again.

  “No,” Tommy said firmly, his hand on her chest. “Wait for the paramedics.”

  As though on cue, the sound of sirens echoed in the distance.

  Her fingers tightened reflexively around Tommy’s fingers as the full force of what might have happened if he hadn’t shown up hit her.

  “Oh God, what if you hadn’t come over?” Kate said, her voice high and thin. “He was going to—”

  “Don’t think about it right now,” Tommy said, the gentle brush of his fingers over her cheek belying the undercurrent of rage in his voice. “You’re safe now. That’s all that matters.”

  The sound of sirens got louder. “I’m going to go upstairs and open the front door, okay? I want you to promise me you’ll lie still and try not to move.”

  “Promise,” Kate said. She winced at the pain of that single word, her eyes squeezed shut again. Immediately her grip on consciousness weakened.

  As she drifted out again, she felt him lean closer, his lips right next to her ear as he whispered, “I’ll be right back. Don’t be scared.”

  Then there was a gentle touch on her forehead. A kiss? She was out again before she could be sure.

  Tommy looked at Kate for a few moments, feeling that a softball-size lump was going to cut off his air supply as he watched her drift back to unconsciousness. Fear like nothing he’d ever felt before screamed through him at the sight of her, so pale and still. He’d nearly lost his mind when he’d seen her lying there, unconscious on the floor like a broken doll.

  The moment she’d stirred, the soft sound of his name on her lips had sent a burst of relief and joy through him so fierce for a second he’d felt the burn of tears behind his eyelids.

  But that did nothing to quell the rage that made him want to find the bastard who hurt her and tear him apart with his bare hands. He was going to find whoever did this and make him pay, he vowed.

  For now, though, he had to shove the fury aside and put his energy toward helping Kate. And she was far from out of the woods. Just because she was awake didn’t mean she was in the clear. Head injuries were tricky like that. A seemingly harmless bump on the head and you could end up with a brain bleed.

  The blow Kate had taken had been anything but harmless.

  You need to get upstairs and make sure they know where they need to go and that they don’t waste any time. But everything in him rebelled against the idea of leaving her alone for even a second. An irrational, terrified part of him convinced that if he left her, she’d slip away.

  On your feet, soldier! A voice that sounded an awful lot like his boot camp drill instructor screamed from within. Focus on the task at hand and get your lily-livered ass upstairs.

  He shoved himself to his feet and marched up the stairs, pausing to open the drapes on the upstairs windows and allow early evening sunlight to flood the room. The sun-filled living room and kitchen showed nothing of the violence that had happened just minutes ago.

  There was no hint of what had happened here, what could have happened. A vision flooded his brain of Kate, her breath being choked off by a hand around her slender throat, her eyes wide with panic. Her slender body shoved to the ground. A man coming over her—he shoved the thought away, swallowed back the nausea that rose in his throat.

  Jesus, he’d seen his best friends suffer the most gruesome wounds imaginable. Limbs blown off, intestines falling out of their abdomens. Horrific as it had been, as much as he’d loved his brothers, he’d always been able to do what needed to be done, whether that was to hold the enemy off or tend to his fellow soldiers with the kind of cold detachment necessary to make it through the situation.

  But with Kate hurt, he couldn’t seem to hold the anger and the fear at bay. It ripped at his guts and echoed in his head in an endless refrain: I can’t lose her again. I can’t lose her again.

  He did his best to drown it out as he saw the flash of lights spin a pattern on the wall above the television. Tried to stay coherent as he described what had happened to both the paramedics and the sheriff’s deputy who arrived seconds after.

  All the while he felt like his heart was going to come out of his throat, his hands fisted to disguise their shaking as the paramedics quickly assessed Kate’s condition, put a collar on her to stabilize her neck and head, then eased her onto a stretcher.

  He let them do a cursory exam on him and climbed into the ambulance with her as she was taken to Sandpoint’s main hospital, Bonner General.

  CJ met them at the hospital, looking grim. “I heard the call go over dispatch. Did you get at look at the guy?”

  Tommy shook his head. “All I saw was his arm and his leg as he took off through the doors that open to the lake. Gray sweatshirt, dark pants. Gloves,” he said grimly. “It will be awhile before Kate’s in any shape to talk, but I don’t know if she saw much of anything either.”

  He told CJ everything he’d seen and what Kate had told them, frustration twisting his gut at how laughably little he was able to tell them.

  “Probably some tweaker who needs cash for a fix,” CJ muttered. “Who else would break in in the middle of the afternoon?”

  Tommy shook his head. “From what I saw the place hadn’t been tossed.”

  “Maybe Kate walked in before he could do it.”

  “I’m not buying it.”

  “You think it has something to do with the case?”

  “I think the timing is too damn close to be a coincidence.”

  CJ rubbed his hand across the back of his neck. “If that’s the case, I’d love to know what he thinks we know.”

  He heard a clamor of voices and saw CJ grimace as he looked over Tommy’s shoulder. Tommy turned to look, his expression quickly matching CJ’s as he saw a crowd of a half dozen reporters, including, he noticed with a scowl, the blond bitch who had given Kate such a hard time earlier that day.

  “What the hell are they doing here?” Tommy asked.

  “Someone at the hospital must have tipped them off,” CJ said grimly. He shoved his hat squarely on his head and strode across the lobby area. Tommy caught a camera swinging toward his face and pointedly turned his back. He heard CJ tell them he couldn’t provide any additional details about Kate’s condition, but assured them that a statement would be issued soon.

  “What about Ms. Beckett’s relationship with the man who accompanied her to the hospital, Mr. Ibarra?” Tommy’s shoulder’s stiffened at the sound of the blonde’s voice cutting through the others. “Mr. Ibarra?” Her voice rose to catch his attention. “You seem to be Ms. Beckett’s constant companion. Is there a more personal component to your relationship?”

  Christ, if that wasn’t a loaded question. But Tommy wasn’t about to take the bait. There was nothing about his relationship with Kate that he would offer up for public consumption. Without even turning around, he stalked down the hallway and into the men’s room.

  If the bitch decided to follow him into the john, he’d jump off that bridge when he came to it. By the time he came out, CJ had shooed the group back out the front door, but Tommy noticed that Maura Walsh’s van was still parked outside.

  CJ grimaced when he saw Tommy. “Thanks for the backup,” he said wryly.

  “You’re the one in public office, man. I make it my business to keep my face out of the news.”

  “Yeah, well, I’m afraid this case has put you firmly in it, right next to Kate.” He was silent a couple beats, a speculative look in his eyes. “So is she right? Is there something going on between the two of you?”

  “Nothing you need to know about,” Tommy said through clenched teeth.

  CJ gave him a friendly clap on the shoulder. “I think it would be great if you got together again. Very Shakespearean, torn apart by tragedy…” He trailed off and his gaze turned serious once again. “I’m going back to the townhouse, take a look for myself and question the neighbors. Call me as s
oon as you talk to the doctor.”

  After CJ left, Tommy paced up and down the lobby area while the minutes ticked by at a snail’s pace. How the hell long did it take to do a CT scan anyway?

  Finally, when he thought he would spontaneously combust with impatience, the door swung open and the doctor emerged.

  Dr. Schmidt was in his late fifties with receding gray hair and tired, kind eyes behind wire-rimmed glasses.

  “Is she okay?” Tommy asked.

  “Her scan looks clear,” the doctor said. “No sign of hemorrhage or other trauma.”

  The wave of relief that ran through him was so strong it nearly took him out at the knees. Still, “I want to see her,” he said, needing to see for himself in person that she was okay.

  The doctor indicated the exam room, and Tommy went through the double doors without waiting to be invited. Dr. Schmidt’s hard-soled shoes echoed on the linoleum behind him.

  Kate was sitting up on the gurney, wrapped in a flimsy cotton hospital gown, her face tight and pale with pain.

  “Hey,” he said softly, his wince echoing hers as she turned at the sound of his voice.

  He itched to pull her into his arms, breathe her in, soak up the relief that she was going to be okay. But from the look on her face, her head was still pounding with pain, and any jostling would just add to it.

  Instead, he took her hand in his, curving his palm around fingers that felt too damn cold. “Can’t you give her something for the pain?”

  Dr. Schmidt shook his head. “Not with a concussion this severe. She needs to be monitored for the next twelve hours. Unless someone can stay with her, we’ll have to admit her.”

  No fucking way was she staying in this hospital, not with the guy who did this to her running around free. CJ might think it was a long shot that the break-in and attack were connected to the case, but he wasn’t taking any chances.

  “She’s coming home with me.”

  “You don’t have to,” Kate said weakly. “It’s easier for me to stay here.”

  “The press has already found out about it, probably on a tip from one of the staff.” He shot Dr. Schmidt a meaningful look. “Whoever did this to you knows you’re here.”

  “The hospital has security. Besides, do you really think he’d come after me? It was probably just a random break-in.” The way her voice went up at the end told him she hoped that was the case, but she didn’t believe it any more than he did.

  “It’s possible, but I’m not banking your life on it.”

  Kate swallowed convulsively, the movement drawing his attention to the purple marks ringing her throat. Once again Tommy shoved back the murderous rage swelling in his chest. He was taking her to his house, where he could lock the gates, turn on the alarm, and monitor anyone approaching with his state-of-the-art surveillance system.

  “Thank you,” Kate said quietly.

  “Not necessary,” he replied, fear and anger making his voice harsh. He gave her hand a squeeze and made an effort to soften his tone when he spoke again. “I’ll feel better once you’re out of here.”

  “Okay,” she said softly, and stared at him for several long seconds as though she knew there was more to it than he was letting on.

  “I’ll release her to your care then. Let’s just get your discharge paperwork going and I’ll send the nurse to help you dress,” the doctor said.

  Once the paperwork was handled, Tommy waited outside the exam room and made a quick phone call. When Kate emerged, he took her hand and guided her to the entrance the staff used. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw the familiar blue and silver pickup idling right outside.

  “Thanks, Dad,” Tommy said as he helped Kate climb up and slide onto the bench seat.

  “No problem, son,” his father said, lifting two fingers to the brim of his straw hat and tipping it to Kate. “Now you just relax and I’ll get you home as quick as I can.”

  Kate nodded and closed her eyes. Tommy winced at the evidence of strain from the short walk to the truck. Her face was even paler and tinged with green as though the pain was making her nauseated. Tommy tucked her against his side as though he could somehow take her pain and absorb it into his own body.

  A surge of protectiveness, fierce and primal, swelled inside of him. He didn’t understand its source, didn’t understand why Kate had always brought it roaring to the surface, but he would be damned if he would leave her safety in anyone’s hands but his own.

  As he approached the grove where the single-wide was hidden, the chaos he’d created back at Kate’s townhouse became a distant memory as anticipation welled inside of him, knowing Tricia was waiting inside. With his new plan set, a sense of peace like nothing he’d ever felt before washed over him, along with a surge of triumph.

  But now wasn’t the time to revel in all the ways Kate would be made to suffer. Now he was going to see his love.

  And she was starting to love him back. He could feel it. Warmth bloomed in his chest at how sweet she’d been the last two times he’d visited. Thanking him for the food he brought, expressing her gratitude for his thoughtfulness, offering up a welcoming smile when he approached the bed.

  She’d earned her gifts, he thought with a smile as he unlocked the door to the trailer and pushed it open.

  “Hello, my darling,” he called softly as he closed the door behind him and went, as always, to the small table in the middle of the room to light the scented candle. Soon the heavy vanilla scent masked the staleness of the air and the lingering odors that came from even one so lovely as Tricia being kept in an entirely enclosed space.

  “Hello, sir,” she said softly. “May I please have some water? I ran out awhile ago, and it’s so hot—”

  “Of course,” he said, feeling a pinch of regret at having caused her to suffer. He rummaged through the food bags and pulled out a tall plastic bottle, still cold to the touch. He’d put his sweatshirt and pants back on before he’d set out for the trailer. Now he pulled his hood down to keep his face in shadow and went to her on the bed. He handed her the uncapped bottle and relished the sizzle of electricity that coursed through his body when her fingers brushed his.

  “Thank you,” she said as she eagerly took the bottle in her free hand and drank it down in greedy gulps.

  “I’m so sorry I wasn’t able to come sooner.” He reached out and brushed her hair back from her face, and his heart thrilled when she not only didn’t flinch but seemed to lean into his touch.

  “I’m glad to see you,” Tricia said softly, and set the empty bottle on the bed next to her.

  “Are you hungry?”

  She gave a small shake of her head.

  “You sure? I brought your favorite sandwich from Mary’s. You shouldn’t have any problem chewing it.”

  “No, I’m okay right now,” she said again.

  “In that case I have something else for you.” He pulled the small box out of his pocket and opened it up. “Here, let me light this so you can see.” Careful to keep his face angled away, he lit the candle on the small bedside table and opened the box. Nestled inside was a delicate gold chain with a small charm, fine pieces of gold molded into the shape of a lily with a single diamond nestled in the center.

  “It’s beautiful,” Tricia said.

  “It once belonged to someone I loved very much,” or thought I did, “and now I want you to have it.”

  He plucked it from the box, his fingers trembling with anticipation as he leaned forward to fasten it around her neck. He’d placed it on other necks before. Only one had ever worn it for more than a few days.

  But in the end, she had died too.

  He hoped from the very bottom of his soul that Tricia would wear it forever.

  As he leaned closer to work the tiny clasp, he became aware of an unpleasant reality, one his nose couldn’t ignore. His love, for all her beauty, was beginning to smell.

  Fortunately, he’d thought to prepare for this too. “Today, my dear, I believe it’s time for a shower.”r />
  She stiffened but didn’t say anything as he retrieved a bag from the table. “Shampoo, conditioner, soap, even a toothbrush. And for after,” he said, pulling out a small box, “this very special cream that will make you sparkle like the jewel you are.”

  She gave no response other than a little choking sound as he unfastened her cuff. “Come on now, let’s get you to the bathroom,” he said. But instead of getting up, she huddled against the headboard.

  “Come on now,” he said, an edge to his voice. “We’ve been getting along so well. You know I won’t put up with this defiance.” He reached down and took her arm in his grip and hauled her to her feet.

  Only to discover she was shaking so hard her legs could barely support her. “I don’t want to,” she said, her voice shrill. “Please don’t do this to me. I’m not ready, I’m not ready yet.”

  Realization dawned like a lead ball in his stomach when he realized she thought the shower was a prelude to him raping her. “Sweetheart,” he said, ignoring her odor for a moment as he gathered her into his chest. “The last thing I want is to hurt you. And as much as I desire you, it’s not something I want to take by force. I didn’t lie when I said I would wait for you to come to me willingly.”

  Someone else won’t be so lucky. He quickly shoved the thought aside, afraid the memory of Kate and her fear would push the bounds of his control. The last thing he wanted was for Tricia to be afraid of his needs.

  Her trembling slowed. “You’re not going to force me?”

  “I won’t hurt you unless you make me,” he said, and stepped back, steering her once again toward the bathroom.

  Once she was inside, he handed over the toiletries one by one. All except the special finishing touch. That he kept in his pocket. His fingers tingled in anticipation of smoothing the gold-flecked cream onto the long, slim length of her legs, her delicate shoulders and arms.

  He reached past her and turned on the shower. The water was only lukewarm and came out in a feeble trickle, but it would have to do.