Violet Path

by Olivia Lodise

  About two and a half hours passed, and we still hadn’t caught anything. Mike was getting upset; he wanted to catch a deer or a boar for dinner, but we didn’t see anything other than squirrels.

  “Shhh!” Mike whispered and waved for me to keep quiet. I froze. A magnificent deer with long, beautiful antlers stood in front of us. Mike held out his track-shoot, then pushed a couple of buttons. The deer fell, hit by a bullet in the heart. I pitied the animal as we approached its motionless body.

  The deer’s lifeless, glistening eyes looked up to the sky. Its large eyes reminded me of Lyli’s. Mike grabbed the animal by its legs and swung it onto his shoulders. The head swayed behind his back with every step, slapping against his shoulder blades. The animal seemed to gaze at me regardless of where I stood. Even when I looked away, I felt its glare. It looked at me asking for mercy and pity. A small bullet was lodged between the deer’s ribs, and a thin trickle of blood stained the pure-white fur lining its tender belly.

  I followed Mike back to the camp, and we ran into George and Timothy, who had killed a boar and two rabbits. I couldn’t look at the dead animals as we made our way back.

  We still had three hours before dinner, so I stood at the front of the camp and practiced my aiming by shooting trees with arrows, aiming at knots in trunks. When I returned the quiver to John, he offered me the bow and five arrows as a gift. I hesitated, but he insisted, so I took them.

  I went to my cabin to rest a bit before dinner. So far, it had been an interesting day.

  Someone knocked. “Hey, Alex?” said Maxime in a soft, melodic voice.

  “You can come in. I promise not to twist your arm.”

  He didn’t enter. “I heard you’re really good at fighting. I’m going to give you a test tomorrow morning to see if you can move to the more advanced class.”

  “I’m not that good.”

  “We’ll see. If you pass, you’ll have fighting class twice a day and miss weapons making.”

  “That’s fine with me!” I laughed.

  He didn’t respond, so I assumed that he had left.

  After dinner, I went back to my cabin to sleep. I put on my pajamas and lay down. Sam startled me when he came in shirtless with a towel in his hand. He didn’t even knock.

  “It’s time to shower, Alex,” he said.

  “I’m exhausted,” I said in a deep voice. I was terrible at pretending to be a boy.

  “Well, it’s your first day, and you’re supposed to be with your group at all times, but I’ll cover for you. Nick will understand. Goodnight.”

  “Thanks, goodnight,” I repeated, and he left. The last thing I was going to do was bathe in a lake, naked, with seven other men who thought I was a boy. I would have to figure something out, and quick.

  Chapter 9

  It was still dark outside when I headed for Maxime’s cabin. He was already outside waiting, holding his staff.

  “Good morning,” he said with a slight yawn.

  “Good morning,” I quietly imitated.

  “Well, no use waiting. Let’s go!”

  I followed him to the clearing in the forest again. When we got there, he put his staff down in front of his feet and stretched. I mirrored him.

  We focused on balance and reaction. He showed me different stances and explained each one. They weren’t very difficult to learn. One of the stances consisted of having our feet shoulder-width apart, one in front, one behind, legs bent, our heels forming a right angle with equal weight on both feet. It was hard to be pushed over in this stance, and our knees wouldn’t easily bend. It also made it easy to walk and kick. We then practiced some moves that focused on the fluidity of the movements. Some of the techniques were offensive, while others were defensive. Although the offensive moves were harder to learn, the defensive moves would be harder in a real fight.

  Finally, I got to put what I had learned to use. Every step suddenly seemed a lot harder than before. Maxime wasn’t rough, but he was agile, quick, and intelligent, and he predicted my choices. He was more than skilled.

  We combatted for a long time until he won. He had adapted to my form and used it against me.

  He offered me his hand and helped me up after having nailed me to the ground. “Good. I’m very impressed. You learn very quickly, and you adapted to my technique very well.” Maxime’s encouraging words were bitter to my ears, simply because I had lost and didn’t see the point of learning martial arts for war when Matthew would just shoot with blazing guns from miles away. On the other hand, it was soothing to receive positive criticism instead of Matthew’s harsh treatment.

  I followed Maxime to the river. It was calm, and the sun lightly flew across the water. He told me that he had to go and reminded me how to get back to the camp. I waited for him to leave before slipping into the cool water. I liked the feeling of the water rushing against my skin as I swam.

  I jumped out, dressed, and returned to the camp. The long tables were empty, which signaled that I was early. I dragged my feet to my cabin and slept until the bell rang. I was one of the first to sit down, but I still avoided the small groups and their conversations. Suddenly, I didn’t feel as if I fit in. I didn’t know what to talk about or what was considered “cool” or “interesting.” I never fit in anywhere, and being surrounded by males was even more challenging. As more people came, food was served and we ate quickly while David announced that the previous day’s schedule was becoming permanent. Some groans were exchanged, but mostly cheers sparked in the camp. I did my best not to react; I still couldn’t face David after he had shot and kissed me. I was more than perplexed.

  When I arrived at class, David handed me a thick, black, full-body uniform. He spoke in a monotone voice, “We’ll be sword fighting today, so you’ll need this for protection. We don’t have your size, but this should do. Go and quickly change.”

  I ran back to my cabin and quickly undressed, throwing my clothes everywhere. I pulled on the thick, elastic uniform. The layers of materials were thick and strong. The material was hard on the outside, like a shell, but that did not make the uniform comfortable. It was tight, very tight. I struggled to zip it up the front. It was almost impossible to breathe. The sleeves and pants dug into my skin, cutting off my circulation. The collar choked me, and I felt like I was being sucked in and strangled. I took a deep breath and ran out.

  “Does it fit?” David asked.

  “It’s extremely tight, and it’s hard to breathe,” I said.

  “You’ll get used to it,” he replied. He pushed me aside, and I lined up with the rest of my group.

  David went over the rules and how to handle different swords. He showed us various footwork and different cuts. He talked and talked, sucking in all of the air around us. My heart was racing, and I started to struggle to inhale. I was lightheaded and becoming dizzy. David’s words suddenly became slurred, and then my vision blurred and my legs went weak. I collapsed.

  When I woke up, Maxime was leaning over me. I pushed him away, coughed, and inhaled as much air as I possibly could to fill my lungs. I looked around and realized I was on his bed in his cabin. I panicked. I noticed that my suit was unzipped. I suddenly became very self-conscious and scrambled to zip it up. I couldn’t remember how I had gotten there. The blood rushed to my face.

  Maxime sighed. “You know, they train us and it’s a requirement to learn first aid, but not once had I thought of the panicking that comes with actually performing it. Are you all right?” Maxime was practically laughing, but David was dead serious.

  I nodded, unable to utter a word.

  Maxime handed me a glass of water. I thanked him and drank every drop of it.

  “We don’t have a uniform in your size, so I’m sorry about that. The one you’re wearing is a kid’s uniform, and the next size up probably wouldn’t fit. I had David get your clothes from your cabin; I hope you don’t mind.” He handed me my brown pants and shirt.

  “We’re going to wait outside. I’m sending in a doctor; she’s from
Maria, the village not far from here, and she’s in charge of the healthcare system for The Shadows. She comes often, but Sam is the official nurse here in the camp. I figure you’d be more comfortable around her.”

  I thanked him softly, and he closed the door behind him. I jumped up and quickly changed, still embarrassed not only because I had fainted in front of everyone, but also because the leader of The Shadows unzipped my uniform and administered CPR. At least I would be around another female soon. I heard a knock at the door, and Maxime’s soothing words announced that Megan was about to enter. I did not know what to expect or how to act, or even if she knew who or what I was. I stood awkwardly in the middle of the cabin as a young woman in her late twenties entered with a red bag in her hands. She had tempest eyes and dark, brown hair with pale skin.

  She introduced herself full of energy, “Hi, Alex. I’m Megan. I did most of your knee surgery. Glad to see you’re up and going.”

  I thanked her, and she smiled gently. She motioned for me to sit down on Maxime’s bed and asked me to take off my shirt. She listened to my heart and lungs. She then asked me for my hand to take my pulse.

  “You’re a lefty,” she commented. Yes, I was left-handed, but it was weird that she had noticed that. She continued, “So . . . you are a girl hiding at a men’s war camp. You have a rare blood type, AB positive, and are left-handed. You’re very special.”

  I hated being called “special.”At first, I had appreciated being around another female, but that bubble had burst with her last comment. I started to explain that I was only there because I had been asked to stay, but she cut me off to tell me that excuses were unnecessary.

  “You know, you need to be more careful. I know this incident was kind of ridiculous, but as much as I enjoy your company, I don’t want to see you too often. Besides, with a rare blood type, it’s not easy to give you transfusions. Your last donors need a break as well. Other than being dehydrated, you’re very healthy. It’s a good thing Andrew is medically trained.”

  Nobody had told me that I had a transfusion from the gunshot wound David inflicted. “Thanks. If you don’t mind me asking, who were my donors?” I was curious and felt the need to thank them.

  “Sam and Andrew. You three are the only ones with AB-positive blood here.”

  “Not David?”

  “No.”

  “But they’re brothers.”

  “But not by blood. Now, if you don’t mind me asking, why are you here? Why stay at a war camp? Andrew didn’t say much about it.”

  I wasn’t sure if I could tell her anything, especially if Maxime hadn’t told her much, but most importantly I wasn’t too sure of why I was staying. I had thought about it, but couldn’t understand my decision. The only rationale I believed was that I was against Matthew, like The Shadows, but there was something else keeping me around, which I couldn’t put my finger on. All I knew was that it had something to do with Maxime and why he had asked me to stay. “I guess it’s because I would like to stop Matthew.”

  Megan smiled. “That’s everyone’s answer here; you’ll fit in fine.” She left, and I dressed.

  Maxime and David greeted me outside and took the swordsmanship uniform from me. I thanked them and walked down the stairs alone. Before I reached the bottom, I realized that I hadn’t the slightest idea of the time or where I was supposed to be, so ran back up. As I approached the door, I heard the two brothers arguing.

  “You almost killed her!” Maxime was enraged.

  “How is this my fault? You’re the one keeping her here where she is in danger. You know the penalty!” David shouted.

  “She’s in more danger if we let her go,” Maxime said.

  “Why? How?” David asked.

  “You can answer that yourself. Besides Matthew’s plans, the other communities also act on opportunities.”

  “So we keep her here, still in danger, and endanger everyone else?”

  “I’m working on the outcome of all of this,” Maxime said in a tired voice.

  “Talk to her. She might have an idea or at least a bit more common sense than you. You act before seeing a plan through!”

  “First of all, she doesn’t know what we’re talking about. Secondly, you should apologize,” Maxime said.

  I stood outside the door, fighting every urge to barge right through and demand some answers.

  “Why should I apologize to you? Since when are you so emotional?” David said irritated.

  “No, you should apologize to Alex.”

  My heart flourished as Maxime defended me. On the other hand, it was really weird.

  “Why? She’s not even here—”

  “Come in, Alex,” Maxime interrupted.

  My heart raced. I knew I wasn’t supposed to eavesdrop, but how could I not? I took a deep breath and pushed the door open, embarrassed again. “What time is it?” I muttered as I fixed my eyes to the floor.

  “Lunch will start in no more than five minutes. You should head over there now. No need to go see Will; I’ve already talked to him. And don’t forget to drink some water,” Maxime said in a concerned voice.

  I nodded, then closed the door and left. All the way back to camp, I couldn’t help but wonder what they were talking about. David had said that I wasn’t safe here, but I didn’t know what he’d meant. If I was in danger here, would I be safe anywhere? I had started to trust Maxime, but that was as far as my confidence in anyone went. Matthew had kept everything from me. On the other hand, I desperately wanted to fit in somewhere. I couldn’t stop thinking about their argument, but I didn’t want to demand answers.

  To my surprise, I wasn’t the first at the long tables. I sat down in front of the filtered water pitcher and poured a glass. I gulped the water down, then served myself a second, then third, then fourth, and then finally a fifth glass. I was extremely thirsty.

  As more people came, the food was served. Sam sat next to me and asked if I was all right. I nodded and thanked him for his concern. It was a relief that no one else asked if I was okay.

  Marc sat beside me. He was one of the younger soldiers in his twenties with dark, black hair similar to mine. He introduced himself very professionally with a strong handshake, but he also beamed with a sense of warmth. After a few minutes of slow and mundane conversation, he started to tell me about his fiancée and how excited he was to be engaged.

  “I proposed almost two months ago. She’s beautiful; you’ll have to meet her. We’ve known each other for what seems like forever. God, I wish this war were over so I could spend my days with her. Do you have a girlfriend, Alex?” His voice was overflowing with passion.

  “Um . . . no . . .” I looked away. I sat up straight with my shoulders back as a form of reassurance that I was fitting in and acting like a boy.

  When everyone finished eating, my group cleared the table, then ran off to get our hunting gear. We met at the clearing where Maxime had taught me earlier. We split up into smaller groups. Nick announced that he would go with Sam, Tim, and I. Nick always seemed to know exactly what to do; it was like having a wise mentor lead you around.

  Although I loved archery, I never appreciated hunting. The thought of killing a defenseless animal sent shivers down my spine, even if it was a case of survival.

  To my relief, Mike, George, Tim, and Nick caught dinner, so I didn’t have to. I watched them carry the lifeless animals across their backs, with patches of bloodstained fur and black, marble eyes glaring at me. I kept looking away.

  As we had time before dinner, I returned to the same tree as the previous day and practiced shooting arrows. I notched an arrow on the bowstring, positioned my feet, set my head, and brought my bow up to eye level. I took a deep breath, pulled back to my anchor point, aimed, and released. The arrow landed an inch above my target. I repeated the same process, and the second arrow went slightly left. The third ended up a bit over to the right. I started to get frustrated.

  “You’re not relaxing your bow arm, so you’re gripping the bow last
minute, which causes the arrow to kick in the direction you pull the bow,” Maxime said from behind. “Here, let me help you.”

  I notched another arrow and pulled it back. As soon as I reached my anchor point, I felt his warm hands rest on my shoulders. He whispered, “Release,” and his breath danced lightly on my neck. All of my muscles went weak, and the arrow flew out from the bow and dug into the center of my target. By the time I had inhaled enough courage to face him, he had disappeared into the woods.

  Suddenly, David came storming up to me. He spoke to the ground, “I’m sorry.” Then he left. I figured that Maxime had forced him into apologizing. I still felt insecure around David. What bothered me the most was his grudging attitude, and I promised myself that I would at least try to change it.

  It was getting darker sooner, indicating that winter was on its way. I had always loved the soft snow that muffled my steps, but I never truly appreciated the cold or the forced gratefulness during the holidays that had lost their meaning decades ago.

  The blue sky was becoming a light purple as the sun set, making everything look pink, peaceful, and calming. The dinner bell broke the gentle spell, but the delectable smell from the long tables near the bonfire seemed to be a fair compromise. I quickly sat down.

  I ate and drank, listening to everyone’s conversations while observing them. As usual, no one spoke to Maxime, and he left the table early. He appeared to be the loneliest person I had ever met, even lonelier than I.

  After dinner, I quickly changed and lay on my bed. I tried to analyze what had been happening, what Maxime had told David but couldn’t tell me. As my joy shifted to thoughts of Maxime, I felt the need to suppress his image in my mind, but it had already been engraved. I couldn’t quite make out what attracted me to him, but he was so peculiar. Mystery surrounded him like a thick cloud. He was extroverted, yet extremely secretive, and he treated me differently from anyone else. There was a caring touch that came with a protective trait. Maxime gave me a feeling of belonging and fitting in that I had always wanted to feel. It was like an addiction, a drug, but one without consequences, one with nothing but the feeling of soaring.