by Rhavensfyre
Dani shrugged. “Suit yourself. I’ll be down in a few minutes and we’ll head over then.”
Allyse watched her walk away then headed back to the kitchen to rinse out their cups. Something was wrong, she was sure of it, all she needed to do was figure it out. Then she remembered something about last night that hadn’t clicked until now. Dani stumbling into the bathroom and going straight for the medicine cabinet, half asleep and mumbling…talking to her uncle as if he was still alive. If she hadn’t been caught up in her own misery she would have paid more attention to the odd expression on Dani’s face when she turned and found her sitting on the floor. Resignation, relief, and then horror as that relief flashed across her face in succession before she launched into action…falling back into the role of caregiver all too easily.
“What a horrible way to wake up,” Allyse murmured to herself. How many times had Dani woken up in the middle of the night to take care of her uncle while he was sick? Allyse put down her mug and stared out the window. A few things she had noticed made a lot more sense now. The adjoining bedrooms. The shared bathroom. Dani must have set it up that way so she could get to him quickly and easily.
Dani stomped down the stairs a few minutes later, dressed for work in a pair of old faded jeans, a simple t-shirt and boots. Her cowboy hat completed the ensemble. “Ready to go?”
“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” She had a hard time not staring. The woman really had no idea how sexy she looked dressed like that. She took a deep breath to fortify herself, then held up a pad of paper and a few pencils. “I even brought something to keep me busy while you’re working. It’s a beautiful day outside. It would be a shame to waste it by staying inside when I can enjoy the sunshine and good company.”
***
Allyse found a comfortable place to sit just outside of the arena where Dani was riding. The benches were comfortable and relatively new, the pale yellow wood hadn’t turned gray and weathered yet from exposure to the elements. They also offered an excellent view of the arena, set up on a small hill that gave her a great view, much like the bleachers at a stadium. Right now Dani and her horse were completing a series of complex maneuvers that made her dizzy just watching them. And while she didn’t quite understand the difference between the different competitions and styles, it was really amazing to watch Dani and her horse fly through the arena. Horse and rider seemed to move together in complete harmony. Dani didn’t even seem to need the reins, not even when her horse stopped and spun in a tight circle so quickly, her hat should have flown off from the centrifugal force. She made it look so easy, balancing on her horse through rapid take-offs and sliding stops that Allyse couldn’t even imagine doing, not without a good amount of Velcro, a seat-belt and maybe a valium for her nerves.
After about thirty minutes of repeating the same pattern, Dani dismounted. Affectionately patting the horse’s neck, she murmured something too quietly for Allyse to hear. It was almost comical when the horse tossed its head as if agreeing with whatever she said, their conversation continuing while Dani walked over to the fence. Allyse stayed put, refusing to move a muscle until Dani told her it was okay to. After the fiasco with Polo there was no way she was going to do anything that might interfere with Dani’s training—or get her hurt again.
“Did you enjoy the show?” Dani asked.
“Yes. It was really wonderful to watch.”
“Thank you, she’s a really good mare.” Dani patted her horse’s neck again. “I need to walk her out for a little bit before we go in.”
Dani led the horse back to the barn while Allyse followed from a safe distance. Once there, she quickly untacked her horse. The mare gratefully gave up the metal bit in her mouth, accepting the halter and lead in its place with a huge yawn. Dani unclipped the mare from the tie outs and turned her around, leading her back out to a grassy area behind the barn.
“Is there a point to this?” Allyse asked as Dani started to walk the mare around in circles.
“Yes, it helps so her muscles don’t get stiff and helps to prevent colic.”
“Colic? You mean like what babies get?” Allyse asked, remembering a weeks’ worth of fussy baby when a certain formula didn’t agree with her. All of this to avoid having a cranky horse?
“It’s a bit worse than a tummy ache for a horse.” Dani chuckled. “It’s kind of like what you had going on last night, except that horses can’t burp or throw up so anything going on in their stomach eventually gets to their intestines. Walking her out like this lets her relax and reduces the risk of her getting sick.”
“Okay, that makes sense.” Allyse didn’t like being reminded about last night, but it did serve to bring up the subject she wanted to talk about. “Are you upset about last night?”
“No. It bothered me that you were sick, but I’m not upset at you for getting ill. I am pretty sure you didn’t do it on purpose.”
“Something’s been bothering you today,” Allyse pressed on. “Please don’t make me drag it out of you.”
“It’s nothing, Allyse.” Dani didn’t feel like talking about the past or thinking about a future that might not include her in it. The mare was cool now so she called her assistant trainer, Ellie, over and handed her off without another word. She knew what to do.
“It doesn’t seem like nothing.”
“I don’t feel like talking about it. What I am going to do is go take a shower so we can get going. I promised you a trip into town,” Dani announced, then stiffly walked away.
Allyse shared a questioning glance with Ellie who had wisely stayed silent during the entire conversation. Ellie shrugged and Allyse sighed, then they both shook their head without saying one word between them. The best she was going to get was a sympathetic grin before Ellie headed back towards the barn.
Again…again she let Dani walk away from her, something Allyse had promised she wouldn’t do. That was before she realized Dani wasn’t doing it to be stubborn or purposefully obtuse, she was running away to avoid something hurtful. Something about last night had Dani seriously bothered, and it wasn't just about her uncle. She didn’t know what it was, but she vowed to find out one way or another before the day was over.
Back at the farmhouse, Dani was exactly where she said she would be. Allyse didn’t hesitate, she headed up the stairs and straight towards the sound of running water. Joining Dani in the shower was just the thing she needed to do right now. Allyse was a fast learner, and one of the things she just learned was that whatever this connection was that they had going between them, it seemed stronger when they were being intimate. It was hard to lie when you were naked, and she couldn’t think of a more honest moment between two people than that moment when you were calling out to a lover in the throes of passion. It was possibly the only time when speech and body language truly melded together into some immutable truth that even someone like Dani, who had a hard time reading people, could feel the emotion behind the words and trust what was being said. At the top of the landing Allyse stopped and smirked at her attempt to explain her reasoning…because maybe, just maybe I want this for myself as well.
***
Dani scrubbed the soap out of her eyes so she could see when the door to the shower opened and Allyse stepped in.
“Allyse.” Dani spoke in a low warning voice. “I don’t know what you want…”
“I don’t want anything. I just felt the need to clean up, too,” Allyse murmured, taking the washcloth out of Dani's hand. “Turn around,” she ordered, then started washing Dani’s back.
“Mm. That feels good. If this is how you clean up, feel free to join me anytime,” Dani groaned. Her accolades ended in a low moan when Allyse abandoned the cloth and used her own two hands, slippery with soap, to massage the tense muscles along her spine.
Allyse let her hands wander, reaching around Dani’s body to make lazy circles across her stomach, then danced along Dani’s ribcage until she cupped her breasts. Keeping her hands busy, she found Dani’s nipples hard and swollen
. She couldn’t resist pinching them between her fingers. Dani moaned again, throwing her head back to rest on Allyse’s shoulder.
“Ah, God…Allyse.”
Dani’s voice was almost lost in the sound of the water running, but it still made Allyse shiver. Emboldened by Dani’s response, she slid one hand down until she found soft, damp curls tucked between taut thighs. A frustrated half-growl escaped from her, answered by a low chuckle and a shift in position as Dani moved her legs farther apart to give her more access. Allyse continued her exploration, slipping her fingers between silken folds and finding her lover slick and ready for her. Dani’s hand came up and covered hers at her breast, the tension thrumming through her arm and wrist a testimony to what Allyse was doing to her. The other hand sought purchase in unforgiving stone, her nailbeds turning red from pressing hard against the shower wall. Finding her rhythm, Allyse stroked along Dani’s pulsing clit, teasing the sensitive bundle of nerves as her lover rocked against her. Steam swirled around them, carrying the heady scent of Dani’s arousal with it just before she cried out, her body shuddering in Allyse’s embrace. She coaxed every last drop of passion out of Dani until she had trouble standing on her own and her breath came in great rasping gasps that would have begged her to stop if she was able.
***
Lying in bed together after their long shower, Allyse curled drowsily around Dani. She had made a comfortable pillow out of Dani's shoulder and was content to bask in the afterglow of their lovemaking. Dani ran her hand up and down Allyse's arm in a lazy path that left goose bumps behind like an afterthought.
“What are we, Allyse?” Dani asked, finally breaking the silence. “I mean…girlfriend sounds so juvenile. So what are we?”
“Lovers. We are lovers,” Allyse answered softly, thinking that was an odd question considering what they just did together.
“But what does that mean for us? For later?” Dani asked, sounding frustrated. “You are going to leave soon. Where does that leave me?”
“Is that what’s been bothering you?” Allyse pushed herself up so that she could look Dani in the face. She was surprised to see tears gathering at the corner of her eyes.
“Partly, yes.”
“That’s easy, then. I will come out on the weekends whenever I can, and maybe you will come to New York. We will make it work.” Allyse spoke earnestly, hoping to chase the forlorn look in Dani’s face away.
“You actually want to keep seeing me after you leave?”
Allyse poked Dani for asking that question, resulting in a high pitched squeak that ended in a glare she was sure was more related to making her squeak than anything else.
“I told you before, you are not a fling.” Allyse was seriously affronted. “If I wasn't getting used to how your mind works, I would be seriously upset that you even asked that. But yes, I want to keep seeing you.”
It was Allyse's turn to squeak when Dani pulled her up along the full length of her body and kissed her soundly. “I swear, Allyse. You better not be stringing me along.”
“String. You. Along.” Allyse repeated slowly. “My dear, I doubt anyone could string you along. I’ve seen you with those horses, and while they are well trained and let you lead them anywhere, I doubt you are that easy to lead, let alone have someone else determine the path you are going to take.”
“You might be right on that one, at least I hope you are.” Dani chewed on the corner of her lip, caught up in a private thought that Allyse desperately wanted to be privy to but managed to refrain from asking. Worried brown eyes flashed at her, a current of uncertainty still moving around in the shadows. “Do you still want to go into the city?”
“Let me ask you something. Do you really want to go? Be honest.”
“No, not really. I’m sorry, Allyse. Maybe if it wasn’t so full of people, I’d be okay with it, but it’s not my favorite thing in the world to do.”
“Okay, then we won’t go.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really,” Allyse said, realizing that the decision wasn’t the least bit difficult to make when she considered Dani’s perspective. To Allyse, the city was home. A concrete landscape that was more familiar to her than the wide open spaces of Dani’s farm. When she thought about it like that, Dani’s discomfort made a lot of sense. Dani was at home on her farm. She was used to the country, to the green grass and trees and rolling pastures. Allyse was used to the crush of people all around her, it was normal in the city. Dani wasn’t. Of course it would make the younger woman edgy. The more she thought about it the more she worried.
It was just Baltimore, a pale comparison to the insanity of New York. If the other day was any indicator of how Dani would fare there, it didn’t look that good. The river of people walking past them was a trickle next to the flood of humanity that flowed along the sidewalks of New York. And absolutely none of that matters, Allyse thought.
She would make it work, no matter what she had to do. She had to. There was no way she could give up what they had growing between them, not without seeing where it might go. Dani had been worried about time, and that only served to reinforce her decision. Eventually, she would have to go back to her life in New York, but that wasn’t the total of her existence anymore. A good chunk of her heart sat in the middle of a backwoods farmhouse, firmly in the hands of one quiet cowgirl who didn’t know how much she’d changed her world.
She gazed into warm brown eyes.
“Yes, I think staying in is a much better idea. We can always pick up where we left off tonight,” Allyse added, her voice thick with promise. The energy in the room shifted along with the heat in Dani’s gaze. The uncertainty was gone, replaced by a speculative gleam that promised more mischief than she could handle right now. She slapped a bold hand away before it could reach her. That was not the way to get out of bed before something else happened. She laughed, a joyous and light hearted laugh that mirrored how she was feeling. “Not now, I still need time to recover.”
“Count on it.” Dani winked at her, then rolled out of bed and onto her feet in one swift motion that Allyse instantly envied. She refused to acknowledge that nimble movement as something she had owned at one time, but only carried as a memory. She would not think about their age difference now. She was too pleased with how the morning had turned out. They had talked. Not about everything that was bothering Dani, but enough to make it feel like a win and that was just fine with her. They had time. Besides, it was really hard to focus on serious matters when there was a very nicely shaped backside walking away from you. There would be time for seriousness later, she decided, forcing herself to crawl out of bed. She didn’t even attempt to replicate Dani’s catlike maneuver, it was enough that nothing popped or complained when she stood up.
Chapter Twenty
Allyse’s phone skittered across the coffee table and would have fallen if not for Dani’s quick reflexes. She leaned forward and scooped it out of mid-air before it could hit the carpet.
“Are you expecting a call?” she asked, handing the phone back to Allyse.
The screen flashed then went black, but not before Allyse saw the reminder she had programmed into the phone. It was time for her evening medications. “No. Not yet. It was just reminding me it’s almost time for the girls to call. I must have forgotten and left it on vibrate this morning.”
Dani snorted. “That sounds suspicious. Didn’t want to be interrupted during OUR shower this morning?”
Allyse flushed. Dani was way too spot on with that comment. “Maybe. But I should put the phone on the charger. Do you mind if I leave you for a few? I might as well call them for once and surprise them.”
“Sure. I’ll just go out to the workshop and finish up a few things I need to do before the weekend.” Dani uncurled herself from the couch and stretched, then turned off the TV before giving Allyse a quick peck on the cheek. “I’ll see you in a few. Have fun.”
Allyse felt her phone vibrate again and glanced nervously in Dani’s direction. She was halfway
out the door and not paying any attention to her. She swiped the screen lock to turn off the notification and headed for her room. She was late taking her meds—again. Her physician would read her the riot act if he found out, but he would probably kill her himself if she told him she had missed entire doses. The little pill box she was supposed to use to keep her organized smiled up at her like a jack-o’-lantern…each dose a missing tooth from the am and pm slots. Without thinking about it, she touched her fingers to her neck, counting out her pulse. It was surprisingly steady and not beating like a jackhammer. She also couldn’t remember the last time her chest hurt. She mapped out the missing doses and bit her lip. The days of the week and times might as well have been notations in a dirty little diary. They all coincided with time spent with Dani…in her room and doing things that should have stressed her heart, but instead, she felt better than she had in ages.
She poured the pills out in her hand and considered them. Should she take them or wait? In a couple of weeks she’d be back home and she could see her doctor again. Weighing the pros and cons in her head, she added Dani into the equation and decided she should continue to take them. Just because she wasn’t having any chest pain now didn’t mean it wouldn’t come back later. Dani didn’t need to deal with her medical issues and having to call an ambulance because she decided to go off her medications didn’t seem like a good idea.
She tossed the tasteless pale pastel rainbow of pills down with a glass of water from the bathroom sink and stood there for a moment, staring at her reflection. The woman staring back at her wasn’t quite a stranger, but she did look different from the corporate leader she left behind in New York. She turned her head from side to side, even going so far as to touch her face with her fingertips. She looked tanner, the blonde streak across her temple standing out almost white. As for the rest of her hair, sun-streaked strands of honey brown mixed into the darker strands, a willing victim of nature’s hair stylist. The combination made her look younger and older at the same time, depending on if you looked at her face or her hair first. There wasn’t a single sign of dark circles under her eyes, a common sight after frequent late night meetings to meet deadlines…and that was without an ounce of makeup on. That was another thing. She rarely went without at least a bit of foundation, but since Dani didn’t seem to notice the effort, she had taken a vacation from that daily routine as well. It seemed silly to worry about it, especially when Dani had seen her naked in more ways than one, including several mornings of glorious morning hair she’d rather not focus on.