Tingle (Revenge Book 2)

by Burns,Trevion

  She didn’t feel unsafe. Not even as his green eyes blazed like an inferno. She wasn’t afraid. She wondered if she ever would be with him.

  Not even as his deep voice ebbed even deeper, slightly hoarse from the anger that immediately began scratching it up. “You’re gonna get yourself killed.”

  Veda came to her toes and whispered her deepest truth. “I’m not afraid to die.”

  His teeth bared. “Give me back my badge.”

  Hers did, too. “No.” Her pounding heart wouldn’t even let her be amazed at his perception. That he knew, without asking, that she had it. It wouldn’t let her be amazed at anything outside of his pulsing arms, his tightened jaw, or the heat in his gaze.

  Holding her eyes, Linc stepped away from her. Then he stepped forward. He went to speak, but nothing came. Then, a growled, “Impersonating an officer is a misdemeanor-level offense. I could have you under arrest right now.”

  “So do it.” Veda searched his eyes, never seeing more emotion in them as she did right then. She waited for him to produce his handcuffs and follow through, but when he didn’t, her voice lowered. “Eugene is chief of security at Blackwater Cruises.”

  He pressed his hands on the wall on either side of her, as if it had suddenly become hard to stand. His head fell, and he breathed out a frustrated chuckle.

  Veda’s voice lowered, knowing the ground she was seconds from treading had the power to shift his psyche in an instant. “I can’t imagine how easy it is to disappear someone—especially a poor girl from the hill that nobody will look for—when you’re head of security for a company that sails hundreds of miles away from this island, every single day.”

  He lifted his fiery eyes to hers.

  Veda saw the moment they glistened with the beginnings of emotion. “Gage told me your wife went missing on a Blackwater cruise.”

  His eyes reddened. The sound of his nails clawing into the plaster on either side of her head rang out.

  Veda continued. “But I doubt I’m the first one of us to make that connection.” She swallowed thickly. “So why am I the only one of us who’s actually willing to do something about it?”

  She heard the moment his breathing began to wobble. His eyes softened, and so did his hands against the wall. His wounded gaze fell to the ground. He shook his head, voice now barely audible. “I’m forbidden to look into my wife’s case, or any missing person’s case, on company time. If my captain gets even a whiff, it’s an automatic suspension…” His eyes rose to hers. “Turns out I’m fresh out of those. One more would mean my job.”

  “Let me help you,” she begged, speaking solely to the change she saw in his demeanor. “Let me help you find out what happened to her.”

  “Why?” Linc shook his head, cringing. “Why do you care?”

  “Why wouldn’t I?” She felt her face grow flabbergasted. “Something is off at Blackwater Cruises, Linc.”

  “You think I don’t know that?” The bass in his voice rebounded. “You think I don’t know every inch, every foot, every angle of my wife’s case? You think I haven’t lost hours of sleep at night, every night, for the last five years, because there’s not a goddamn thing I can do about it?”

  Veda jolted when his voice rose.

  The line at his brows deepened. “Why do you care?”

  Because you saved my life. She couldn’t say those words, so she said the next best thing. “Let me help you.”

  He breathed out a laugh, but his eyes remained weary.

  “You think she’s still alive,” she said.

  “Yeah, well… maybe I’m crazy.”

  She shook her head rapidly. “I don’t think you are.”

  He searched her eyes.

  Silence.

  Veda came to her toes. “If you can’t look into her case without getting fired, then let me do it for you.”

  “Have you forgotten so quickly that your boyfriend’s last name is the same one painted on the side of every cruise ship that sails…” He stole her words. “‘Hundreds of miles away from this island, every single day?’”

  “I told you… Gage is different. He’s not like the rest of them.”

  “The hell he isn’t.”

  “Well, then he never has to know. It’ll just be…” She swallowed. “You and me. Besides… if anything, Gage being my boyfriend is a positive.” She shrugged one shoulder. “Puts me in a pretty good position to help you get information you might not have access to otherwise.”

  “Why?” he pressed.

  Veda let her voice get emotional, shoulders in her ears. “Because I’m just a kid from the hill… who’s sick of seeing kids from the hill treated like their lives don’t matter.”

  Understanding washed over him. His previously tightened biceps eased, taut muscles releasing and giving his tan skin room to breathe.

  “There’s no point going after Eugene,” he grumbled. “The case brought up against him over Greta Greer as been sealed and expunged for years. Going after him for Zara’s disappearance will be a waste of time too. He’ll find a way to wiggle free, because where there’s money, there is always a way. Don’t start a war you’re bound to lose. You won’t win this, Veda.”

  She couldn’t help the swelling in her chest at the sound of her name on his lips. “Maybe you don’t know this about me, and maybe the fact that I went from the hill to a medical doctor hasn’t made it clear enough, so allow me to clarify…” She shook her head at him, voice lowering. “I. Don’t. Lose.”

  He smirked at her.

  She shrugged. “I don’t lose. Because I have nothing to lose.”

  He stepped away. “You might not give a shit about the thin ice you’re treading, but I won’t let you put your life on the line trying to go after these people.”

  “So then work with me,” Veda begged. “Whatever pieces of your wife’s case you can’t look into, I’ll do it for you, and you’ll just… be in the background.”

  He hesitated.

  “God, Linc, you hate these fucking people as much as I do. I know you do.”

  He went to refute again, but something stopped him.

  Veda saw it happening and pushed for more, stepping forward. “Let me help you.” He’d breathed new life into her ten years ago, and Veda had never wanted to return the favor so badly as she did right then. To erase the darkness living in the depths of his eyes, the darkness that she knew all too well.

  “You’re crazy,” he grumbled.

  After a long silence, Veda scoffed and brushed past him, making sure to bump his shoulder on her way by. She went to her duffle bag in the corner and ruffled through it.

  Linc watched her, and only when she stood and showed him what she’d retrieved from her bag did he let a breathy laugh leave his lips.

  Veda held up her hand. His badge swung down from her fingers, the chain swinging in the quiet air.

  When she was close enough, he snatched it away with a glower.

  “I should arrest you for this.” He crumbled the chain in his hand, motioning to her.

  Veda took a deep breath. He could threaten her with arrest all day long, but somehow, she knew he’d never follow through. She knew, somewhere inside him, he had just as much of a soft spot for her as she did for him.

  His subconscious mind had known all along that she’d had his badge. She wondered if maybe that same subconscious mind knew she was the girl he’d fished out of the water all those years ago. The girl who’d inspired him to go into SVU.

  “650-362-9053.” She took a deep breath. “That’s my phone number… If you ever decide to grow a pair.”

  Their eyes danced for several long, quiet moments.

  His were the first to fall.

  14

  She’d promised to give him time. She’d promised to give him space. She’d convinced herself that if he wanted to come back to her, he would.

  So as Veda found herself entering Gage’s office without knocking, thanking God that he had an assistant who appeared to never return from b
athroom breaks, she wasn’t surprised by the anger on his face at the sight of her.

  “I know,” she said, closing the door and giving it all her weight. She clutched a piece of paper in her hand. “We’re supposed to be taking some time apart. And you’ve made that extra clear by completely ignoring all my calls and texts.”

  Gage dropped whatever he was doing on his computer, leaned back in his chair, and watched her.

  If Veda thought there had been fire in Linc’s eyes at the gym the other day, it was only because she’d yet to be on the receiving end of the incinerating brown gaze of her pissed off boyfriend.

  Was he even still her boyfriend? It had been a week since he’d spent the night with her, or even spoken to her, but it felt like a lifetime. Even the space between them in that office felt like an ocean.

  When he didn’t immediately throw her out, Veda held up the piece of paper she’d been clutching in her hand. “Last night, I got a letter from the student loan office and immediately had to fight back the urge to throw up, like I always do whenever I get a letter from the student loan office.”

  Gage ran a hand down his face, looking unamused.

  “Imagine my surprise,” Veda continued. “When I opened it up and found good news. I thought Jesus had come back, because I certainly hadn’t sent them a check to the amount of five hundred thousand dollars. At least not one that would actually clear.”

  A lump moved down his throat. He avoided her eyes.

  Veda’s watered. “Thank you, Gage.”

  “It was weeks ago,” he mumbled. “I sent it before—”

  “It doesn’t matter.” She jumped in. “That’s half your yearly salary, and you didn’t have to do it. But you did. And I know I told you I’d give you the space you need…” She took a deep breath. “But all these nights away from you, baby, and I’m learning pretty quickly that I can’t do that. I’m sure you can tell by the abysmal bags under my eyes that I haven’t been sleeping much. I can’t close my eyes for more than a few seconds knowing you were so angry with me. I hate the thought of you going to bed, every night, mad at me.”

  Veda didn’t mention the equally heavy pair of boulders under his eyes, and silently cursed the sadistic part of her that was actually happy she wasn’t the only one struggling.

  Gage leaned one arm on his chair, brushing the tips of his fingers against his lips, the fury in his eyes never wavering.

  Veda pushed off the door. “Gage, Linc is my friend.”

  His eyes slammed closed. He looked a breath away from screaming.

  “And… it’s important to me that you can trust my judgment. That you can trust me enough to let me choose my own friends. To know that I would never, ever hurt you or betray you.”

  His eyes blinked open, fingers falling from his lips.

  “I don’t want to break up, I don’t want space, and I don’t want to go to bed mad anymore.” Veda shook her head. “But I also don’t want to be controlled, Gage. I can’t be controlled.”

  He took a deep breath.

  “You said you wanted the truth about where I was the night I missed our date. So… here it is…” She took a moment, steeling herself for the sheer amount of lies that were about to come pouring from her mouth. “When I was seventeen…” Eighteen. Veda had to take a moment when she felt her pulse pounding under every inch of skin on her body. She hated lying to him. “When I was seventeen… I got attacked by a man.” By your friends. “One night on the hill.” On your mother’s balcony. “While I was walking home from after-school detention.” While I was crashing a party in your parent’s home.

  She paused, already exhausted. She’d never realized how hard it was to talk to Gage until that moment. Maybe because that was the first time she’d ever talked to him about anything real. She couldn’t help but wonder if he knew her, at all? If he could ever really know her, love her, without knowing the true darkness that lay within?

  The anger on his face vanished. His full lips fell open, eyes shrinking. “I didn’t know that,” he whispered.

  “I’m not telling you this to make you feel bad. I’m telling you because I want you to know. You asked me for the truth, and this is it.” Or the closest thing to the truth I can give you. “The real reason I missed our first night out is because… that night was the anniversary of my attack. I thought I had my emotions under control, but then I had a breakdown in the pharmacy. Jake had to spend the rest of the night calming me down in the closet. I was a wreck. By the time I realized what time it was, I was already three hours late for our date. I was so distraught. It completely slipped my mind.”

  Not the whole truth.

  But not a total lie, either.

  Gage sat forward in his chair, his eyes growing softer.

  “After I got attacked.” She exhaled heavily. “I started having terrible anxiety, and the only way I knew how to get a handle on it was to lash out. My parents tried to control me, and I fought it so hard. I fought like a rabid animal in a cage. I started getting into altercations at school. My grades fell. I even had Yale rescind my letter of admission. My father was devastated.”

  Gage’s brows pulled.

  “Things got so bad,” Veda said. “They eventually had to send me to live with my grandmother.”

  She appreciated how much easier the truth was beginning to spill from her lips. Little morsels of information, pieces of herself, she’d never given him. She didn’t miss the softness that entered his eyes, even if it was against his will.

  She stepped toward that softness, feeling it enter her and make all her hard edges a little softer too. “My grandma understands me better than anyone in the world. She knew that to get me back on track, to get me to make good decisions, she had to let me go. To make me think it was all my idea, even though she was secretly pulling the strings the whole time.”

  A smile lifted Gage’s lips, and his eyes rose as Veda circled his desk and leaned on the edge next to him.

  Veda’s eyes fell to his lap, unable to stop her breath from coming shorter.

  The zipper of his pants was bursting at the seams. She knew what he needed. The same thing she’d been needing all those nights away from him.

  He needed her.

  His eyes fell to her thighs from where she leaned against the desk. The ever-softening gleam in his eye and the bulge in his pants won over, sending his hand across the small space that separated them, clutching her thigh.

  A zap of light entered her and spread like wildfire, and she prayed that hand never left her body. “It was because my grandmother trusted me that I was able to trust myself. In a way I’d never been able to do with my parents. She told me I’d never get my grades up, I got them up. She told me I’d never go to college, I went to college. She told me med school would eat me alive, I finished my MD. To the naked eye, her approach probably seems cruel. Maybe even borderline emotionally abusive…”

  Gage shot his playful eyes up to her.

  Veda looked off into the distance, her own smile spreading. “But now I see what she was doing. It was all a part of her master plan. She knew I would always do the opposite of what she told me to. Because I’m just that big of an asshole.”

  Gage tilted his head.

  “Thanks for refuting that, by the way,” she whispered, playfully, feeling his hold on her thigh tighten. “God, Gage, she’d love you, so much. She’d definitely look at you and think you were all her idea, and she’d just made me believe it was mine.” Veda couldn’t help laughing when he sputtered softly. “But you were my idea. You were all my idea. And you’re the best decision I’ve ever made. Even my parents would love you, and they don’t agree with me on anything.” Her eyes fell. “Maybe you could even meet them.” Her brows shot up. “Someday.”

  “Someday?” His smirk grew into a smile, eyes lowered. He took a deep breath, shook his head and looked up at her. “Veda, I don’t want to control you. I want this. Just this. Exactly what you just did.”

  Veda covered his hand on her thigh. The
y entwined their fingers and squeezed.

  “I just want you to let me see you. Let me know you. Let me love you. All of you. The good parts and the bad.”

  “I guess I’ve given you plenty of bad to love already, huh?”

  Gage shot up from his seat when her eyes fell, coming between her legs and cupping her cheeks. “I hated going to bed mad too. These last few nights without you have been the most miserable nights of my life. I didn’t sleep. I’d rather go to bed with the worst part of you next to me than the best part of you across town from me.”

  Veda sputtered out a laugh, and when he leaned in, her eyes immediately shut. She lifted her lips to accept his kiss. The peck was soft, sweet, and patient. So was the one that followed.

  It broke something in Veda, making her lowered eyes water as she whispered against his lips. “I’m sorry.” She moaned against another peck. “I’m so sorry.”

  “I’m sorry too.” His voice had grown low and gravely, more so with each brush of their lips, the warmth of his breathing growing hotter, more fervent, until he was spreading his mouth wide, sweeping hers with his tongue.

  She opened for him, gasping into the warmth of his eager mouth, as the kiss grew passionate in seconds. She wrapped her arms around him, clawing her nails down his back, desperate for the feel of him. He cupped her ass and slammed his hips into hers, never breaking his strong kiss, groaning into her mouth.

  “I love you,” she whispered.

  Their lips parted with a smack, and she opened her eyes just long enough to see the emotional frown on his face before he buried his head in her neck.

  “I’m sorry I left like that…” he spoke into her neck. “You were hurting. You needed me, and I wasn’t there. I wouldn’t listen.”

  She shushed him. “You couldn’t listen. I wasn’t talking. I was shutting you out—I was. But I promise I’ll never do it again, okay?” She buried her hands in his hair.