The Melody of Light

by M. L. Rice

  Riley’s anger waned as self-consciousness washed over her. “I just…God, I don’t know what I’m going to tell Aidan. He’ll be so disappointed in me.”

  “He’ll get over it. You told me that you gave him pictures of everything that was in there. That’s something. That’s still memories.”

  “It’s not the same.”

  “I know. But listen, I’m heading over to Bookwoman on Saturday to pick up some new lesbish books. Wanna join? I guarantee it will make you feel better.”

  “Lesbish?” Riley actually cracked a smile.

  “Who wouldn’t feel better with a new armful of queer literature from our favorite feminist bookstore?”

  “Can I bring Beth?”

  “Duh. Pick you guys up at noon?” She turned to leave, still looking at Riley over her shoulder.

  “Tori?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Thanks. I need a good kick in the ass sometimes.”

  Tori winked and turned to walk up the street toward the Drag.

  Aidan,

  I’m sorry I’m not telling you this over the phone, but I’m just too embarrassed and too pissed off at myself. So I’m just going to say it.

  I lost the heirloom box. Don’t ask me how. I have no frackin’ clue. I saw it at Christmas when I took pictures of everything in it for you to have, put it back in the drawers under my bed, and then…poof…gone. I’ve put up signs in the hallway, talked to the people at the front desk, looked in every study and game room, but nothing. It’s like it just completely disappeared. I even asked Brooke and that bitch just all but ignored me. I just don’t know what’s up with her. You’d think I murdered her puppy or something.

  Anyway. I hate writing to give you bad news, but there it is.

  Now I’m going to change subjects to make you forget about what I just told you.

  How are things over there? Tired of the heat and bad military food yet? Are you staying safe? Keep your head down and don’t do anything stupid or I’ll kill you myself.

  Just so you don’t worry too much about me and my unreliable ways I’ll also say that I don’t know how I could have made it through this year without Tori and Beth. Especially Beth. I’m falling more and more in love with her every day. She’s the first person to ever make me feel like I can let my guard down. I don’t very often, of course. You know how I am. But she has seen more of the demons than anyone else but you. And she loves me in spite of them. Sometimes I want to scream at her to go. Save herself. But the selfish part of me wants to latch on and never let her go.

  When she holds me in her arms…

  God, I feel the most profound sense of comfort. It’s unreal sometimes.

  She draws me in even when I think I should run.

  I am just so madly, insanely, in love with that girl. It’s the most horrible, terrifying, ecstatic, and wonderful feeling in the world.

  I don’t know why I’m gushing about all of this to you. You don’t need to know about your sister’s mushy love life. I just thought that maybe you could forgive me for what I’ve done if you also knew about something that’s going well for me. For the first time in my life…I. Am. Happy.

  Stay safe, Aidan. I love you.

  Riley

  Saturday afternoon, after an enjoyable lunch at Texadelphia and an hour at the feminist bookstore, Tori dropped Beth and Riley off at the dorm. Each carried a bag full of new books they knew they wouldn’t have time to read until the summer and Riley found that she did actually feel a lot better.

  After a kiss good-bye, Beth walked to her car to go home and work on a project while Riley went up to her dorm room. As she passed the notice boards in the hallway, she saw that her lost heirloom flyers had all been taken down. Her brows creased as she stormed down the hallway. Who in the hell would do that? She knew that the answer to that question already.

  She unlocked the door to her room and saw Brooke standing with her back to her, packing clothes into a suitcase. As she set her bag of books on the bed, her heart leapt into her throat. There was the box. It was sitting in the center of the bed as if it had been there the entire time. She quickly took the top off and tears of joy sprang from her eyes she inventoried its contents. Everything was there. She grasped Aidan’s dog tags tightly in her fist and held her mom’s glasses and her dad’s hat to her chest.

  She turned around, cheeks gleaming and asked, “Where did you find it?” Despite their past, she wanted to hug her.

  “I didn’t find it.” Brooke continued packing and sounded vicious. “I took it.”

  It took a moment for Riley to register what she had said. “What do you mean you took it?”

  Brooke whirled around, hands on her hips, and looking livid. “You disgust me, Riley Gordon.”

  Riley stared, wide-eyed and slack-jawed.

  “You are a liar and a thief and I wanted to teach you a lesson.”

  “W-what?”

  “I know you took my pendant. I know you stole it and only gave it back because I made you feel guilty when I told you how important it was to me.”

  Riley’s brain was reeling, still trying to figure out what she was saying.

  “Y-your necklace pendant? You lost that. I found it in the rug by the wall. I left it on your desk for you!” She pointed to the small bowl on Brooke’s desk.

  “Liar! I know your background. You thought you could help yourself. You thought you’d get a few extra bucks if you took it. Thought I’d never notice because I have other jewelry. It’s too bad you just happened to take the most important piece.”

  Riley’s confusion turned into defiant anger. “I did not! Brooke, you lost that pendant and I found it when I was plugging my computer in. I thought you’d be happy! I’d never steal anything from you, you judgmental freak!”

  Brooke rolled her eyes and turned around to continue packing. “You’re just lucky I didn’t call the campus police on you. And the funny thing is I’d never have had proof that you did it if you had never returned it. So after that I made sure that everyone in this dorm knew what a sneak and bitch you are. And I took that stupid box from under your bed. I’ve seen you pawing through that crap. I could tell that it meant something to you and I wanted you to know how it felt. I don’t even know why I gave it back. I should’ve thrown that shit in the Dumpster just to revel in the joy of watching you suffer.”

  The unfairness of what was happening made Riley’s blood boil. She was someone who had dealt with anger her entire life, but she had never been as furious as she was now in the face of this grievous accusation.

  “Brooke, I did not steal that goddamned pendant.” Riley balled up her fists and pressed them to her temples in frustration. “You know what? I have been trying to ignore the way you treat me and excuse your rude and selfish behavior all damn year, but now I see that you really are nothing more than the abusive, horrendous bitch I first thought you to be.”

  “Please.” Brooke slammed the suitcase shut. “You can try to defend yourself all you want, but I am so not staying here anymore. You can have this cell to yourself. I’m moving in with Chad.”

  “Thank God.”

  With that, Brooke took her suitcase and walked out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

  Riley was livid. She couldn’t believe that someone could think such awful things of her. And not only that, but to also spread vile gossip about her to everyone in the residence hall? She was surprised that it had never gotten around to the administrators. She could have been kicked out if people believed it to be true.

  Riley whipped out her iPhone, intent on venting to Beth. It was then that she realized…Brooke was gone. Brooke was gone!

  Glory frickin’ hallelujah!

  *

  Nugget,

  I’m so glad to hear you got the box back. I don’t know what to say about Brooke, though. The whole thing is so overdramatic. I can’t believe that something so stupid and offensive actually happened. I swear, Riley, your life is like a weird soap opera sometimes.

>   I will say that I’m kind of happy it happened too. I’m glad you don’t have to live with her anymore. And say what you want about our lack of parental units, she actually has parents and they raised her to behave like that. I’d say we still got the better end of the deal, wouldn’t you?

  I’m also glad to hear that you’ve finally found some happiness. Beth is a good influence on you and it’s time you found someone who can bring out that joy in you. It’s been way too long.

  Anyway, I have to go now. We’re going on a pretty long string of missions this week and I may not be able to write you back or call for a bit so just know these four things:

  1) You are an amazing person and worth every ounce of air that you breathe.

  2) Beth and your friends are there for you. Lean on them if times get tough. Talk to them. Let them love you.

  3) Mom and Dad are looking down on you and they are so proud of who you’ve become and what you’ve accomplished.

  4) I will always, ALWAYS, love you and be there for you. Even if I’m a million miles away. You’re my little sister and family is everything.

  Also, here’s another pic of me and the guys on our LAV. The answer is yes. It’s just as hot and dusty as it looks out here and there are some scary bits and politics that I don’t understand, but we’ve been trained well and damn if we don’t look good. ;)

  Love ya, Nugget,

  Aidan

  Chapter Seventeen

  The following weeks passed fairly normally considering how strange the weekend had been. Riley did tell Beth everything that had happened with Brooke, and it had taken hours to persuade Beth to not physically harm her. Beth might appear meek and frail, but when she was angry, Riley knew that she was a force to be reckoned with. Her defensiveness filled Riley with pride.

  She and Beth had settled back into their routine of seeing each other for lunch between classes, spending the night together when they could, and continuing to work on their own projects and assignments. With spring break and midterms steadily approaching, they both knew that they would have to support each other in their scholarly efforts. Of course, that didn’t mean that their evenings were always occupied by studying and practicing. Their willpower wasn’t strong enough to keep them from enjoying each other every chance they got.

  During one such evening, after a particularly pleasurable experience, Beth curled herself around Riley’s warm body and purred, “That was just the reward I needed. My project for Oceanography is done.”

  “Congrats!”

  “Yeah. It’s basically my midterm, so now I just have Bio and Chem to worry about. I’m kinda over it at this point to be honest.”

  “Well, you’re luckier than me. We’re working on new music for a big concert in March, I still sound like ass on my solo recital material, and don’t even get me started on the regular courses. I have two weeks to figure all of this out for the tests, and it’s just not happening.”

  Beth hugged her tighter and kissed the back of her neck. “You’re exaggerating.”

  “I dunno. I just feel like I can’t stay ahead. If it wasn’t for this”—she reached back and clasped Beth’s thigh—“I think I would’ve had a nervous breakdown by now.”

  Riley could feel Beth’s lips form a smile. “Again, overreacting. You’re too high-strung for your own good. But don’t get me wrong. I’m glad to help with that.” She moved her hips in even closer.

  Riley felt flushed all over again, but said, “I really need to stay focused these next two weeks. Do you mind if I just stay at my dorm full-time until midterms are over? Just for the sake of convenience and study time? You can sleep in Brooke’s old bed if you want. It’s so much easier with her gone.”

  “Whatever you need. Also, I wanted to ask if you’d be interested in heading over to New Orleans with me for spring break. It’s not the best time to go with all the crazy parties and drunk people, but the D-Day museum is hosting a special seminar about sunken WWII ships. A few of the world’s most prominent maritime archaeologists will be there!”

  Riley could hear the excitement building in Beth’s voice. “But spring break is only two weeks away! Isn’t that kind of short notice for such a big trip?”

  “I just found out about it today. My professor and her grad students are going, and they thought I’d like it too. She’s taking a whole group. Discounts on the hotel rooms and everything. They had someone drop out, so there’s a room free.”

  “Nerdy grad students.”

  “Hey, not every college student would prefer to spend spring break sleeping in a puddle of their own mai-tai-flavored puke in the French Quarter.”

  Riley squeezed her eyes shut. “Beth? Gross.”

  “And anyway,” Beth continued, “the idea of having you all to myself for a whole week makes me…”

  “Yes?” Riley opened her eyes, rolled over to face her and smiled.

  Blushing, Beth said, “Just come with me? Please?”

  Riley leaned in and kissed Beth softly on the lips. “Say that again.”

  “What?”

  Riley kissed her again, harder this time, and Beth gasped when they parted.

  “Say it,” Riley commanded again.

  Beth voice shook as she implored, “Please.”

  Riley smiled as she positioned herself over Beth’s trembling form. “Yes, ma’am.”

  *

  Two weeks later Riley walked in to her dorm room and slammed her backpack down on the bed.

  “What now?” Beth asked with sleepy irritation in her voice. She had been taking a nap after having just finished her last midterm before spring break.

  “I’m pretty sure I just nailed my English exam.” Riley danced around the room, unable to settle down.

  “I bet you did. Come here and give me a hug.” Beth opened her arms wide.

  Riley did a little twirl in between the beds and yelled, “Screw you, midterms! You’re done!”

  Beth jumped up and wrapped her arms around Riley to stop her from pacing. Laughing, she said, “Settle down. You’re going to break something.”

  Riley hugged Beth back fiercely and took a long, deep breath. “You’re my beacon, you know that?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Whenever I get lost you always find me and lead me back. You’re my beacon of light when things get dark in my head. It’s cheeseball, but true. And that’s why I’m so happy. Thank you.”

  Beth smiled and kissed her cheek. “And you’re the fire that keeps me entranced. Every day since I’ve met you has been the best day of my life.”

  Riley pulled away. “Even with the messed-up baggage?”

  “What’s an adventure without a little baggage? Besides, I love being the one who brings you back. The one who will always be here to love you, no matter what happens.”

  Riley hugged her again and breathed in the clean smell of Beth’s skin. It soothed her.

  “Now,” Beth said, “midterms are over and we have nothing but time to spend together. We leave for New Orleans tomorrow afternoon, so go ahead and get packed.”

  Riley pulled away and said, “Yeah. I’m so ready for this trip. I need the break.”

  She went to her closet and pulled out a ratty duffel bag. “I’d say we don’t need too many clothes, but I guess we have to do some things in public, huh? Sightseeing and the like.”

  Beth answered with a well-connected slap to Riley’s butt. “You’re so bad…I love it.”

  Riley smiled as she shoved some shorts and socks into the bag as her cell phone rang.

  “Hello?” She didn’t recognize the number.

  “Riley Gordon?”

  “Yep.”

  “Hey. This is Rebecca from the San Jac desk downstairs. You have some visitors waiting for you in the first-floor lounge. Are you nearby?”

  “Yeah, I’m upstairs. I’ll be right down.”

  “Who was that?” Beth asked as she laid herself down on Riley’s bed and opened her tattered copy of Dr. Robert Ballard’s The Eternal Da
rkness.

  “Desk downstairs. Apparently, someone’s here to see me.”

  “Who?”

  Riley shrugged. “Probably Koji and his new boyfriend. He said he wanted to introduce me before they left for South Padre Island for spring break. God knows if they’ll even make it back from the debauchery they have planned, so I’d better go.”

  Beth had started to read, but murmured, “Mmm,” in agreement.

  “Be right back.”

  Without looking up, Beth waved like a royal with closed, cupped hand and said, “I’ll miss you ever so much whilst you’re away!”

  Speaking loudly over her shoulder Riley said, “Once again…NERD!”

  Riley walked downstairs and smiled at Rebecca at the front desk. The young woman smiled back nervously. God, those damn lies Brooke had spread about her. Everyone thought she was a thief and probably psycho on top of it. She was so ready for this year to end. She wondered if Beth would let her move in to her apartment. It was within walking distance to campus, and she already knew she would like her roommate. Plus, there were just so many perks.

  As she was pondering the pleasures of getting to spend every night with Beth, she turned the corner into the lounge expecting to see Koji. It was empty except for two people.

  Her heart jolted painfully and then felt as if it had turned to molten lead. She could hear the thunderous crack as she realized that her life had just changed. Every ounce of her soul crashed through the floor with excruciating abruptness.

  Standing in front of her with looks of professional sympathy were two Marines in green Alpha uniforms.

  She stuttered to a stop and felt her body vibrate in revolt of what was about to happen.

  “No.” The words escaped her mouth in a whisper of desperate finality. It wasn’t going to be true. This wasn’t happening. There was no way that this could possibly be happening. Not to her.

  The sergeant spoke, “Are you Miss Riley Gordon?”

  Riley stared blankly.

  “Ma’am, I’m Master Sergeant Estrada and this is Staff Sergeant Singer,” he said gesturing to the somber Marine next to him. “Ma’am, are you Riley Gordon, sister of Private First Class Aidan Gordon?”