Finding Faith (Return 0f The Dragons Book 1)

by Grace Brennan

  Turning her head, she gazed at him with her brow furrowed, a little line forming between her eyes that he wanted to smooth away. “You and your brother.”

  Nodding, he gave into the urge, gently touching his fingertip to her soft skin. “Yes. From the age of ten and up, we were forced to fight each other. That’s how it’s done in the wild, and the more dominant gorilla wins, becoming the Silverback. But we were always so evenly matched, there was never a clear winner. So, we were forced to fight over and over again in a never ending battle to see who was more dominant.”

  “That’s awful,” she replied, horror in her moss green eyes.

  “It was. There are a lot of horrible traditions in my troop that need changed. It’ll take work, but I’m going to do it.” Shaking his head, he continued on. “Anyway, he eventually had enough, and he ran away. He’s the only one from our troop to ever leave, but he just couldn’t take the constant fights. Especially since we were close when we weren’t being forced into fighting. But my point is this. If he’d just talked to me before he ran, I could have told him I didn’t want to be the Silverback in charge. And that maybe if we both put our foot down and refused to fight, the others—Pops especially—would have let our decision stand.”

  “You think I should just talk to her. See how she really feels before making any decisions.”

  “It’s what I wish Axel had done. And because he didn’t, our lives all changed irrevocably.” Turning to face her, he took her hands in his. “I don’t want you to lose your sister like I lost Axel. You need to talk to her and find out the truth. Then, you make your decision from there. Maybe her silence is because of something else, and not what you think it might be. If you deny yourself happiness based on a misunderstanding, that will only make her guilt worse when she finds out. It’ll only end up hurting her in the end.

  “And if your suspicions are true… Well, I also think you shouldn’t live your life for her—you should live it for you. No one should live their life based on the fear of how others will react to their choices. We all have a right to be happy, and you shouldn’t deny yourself that chance because you’re worried about how someone else feels.”

  Her green eyes were wide as she stared at him, her pupils flickering briefly, and he wondered if he crossed the line. He didn’t want her to think he was trying to run her life. That was his whole point—no one should have the right to run someone else’s life.

  “I’m not telling you that for selfish reasons,” he clarified. “It might seem like it, because you know how much I want to be with you, but it’s not. I genuinely believe that. The only person who has a say in our lives is ourselves.”

  She didn’t reply, and just as he began to worry that he’d screwed everything up, she shocked him by leaning up and placing her lips gently on his. Relief filled him as she held them there for a few heartbeats, and then she pulled away with a soft smile.

  “Thank you, Cody. I didn’t know just how much I needed to hear those words. You’re right, of course. About all of it. But I still need to talk to Fiona first. Speaking of,” she said, glancing around, “it’s getting dark, so I need to get home soon. I didn’t tell anyone I was leaving, and I need to talk to the other dragons about what happened last night. I should have told them already, but I was hoping to have more information before I did. I thought at first that someone figured out we were here, but now that I know about you, I’m not sure.”

  Cody frowned as he thought about the message on the movie screen and the fight that followed. “I can’t know for sure, but I don’t think that was aimed at you. I think it was aimed at my people. You guys barely go into town, and I know no one’s spotted you shifting. I hear about everything that happens in New Leaf, so I definitely would have heard if a dragon was spotted. No, it was for my troop. I’ve got everyone on alert and looking for clues, so we should know who and why soon.”

  “I’m sure the women will be relieved it wasn’t aimed at us, but someone going after you and your troop doesn’t make me feel much better.”

  Warmth spread through his chest as he brushed her hair back from her face. “Don’t worry. We can take care of ourselves. Nothing will happen to us, and I won’t let anything happen to you and your friends, either. Besides, the ones from last night might well have been the extent of the threat, and they won’t be bothering anyone ever again.”

  Honestly, he wasn’t sure those four had been the only people behind it, and judging by the look in her eyes, she wasn’t sure of that, either. But until they knew more, or more of them showed themselves, there was no need to borrow trouble.

  “Okay. I feel fairly confident in saying the women won’t want to run, so just remember, if this turns out to be a bigger threat, your troop has five dragons on your side.”

  A slow smile spread across his face as he nodded. Leaning down, he gave her one last kiss before reluctantly pulling back. “Okay, my little badass. Let’s get you home.”

  She nodded and hopped off the tailgate before he could help her down. As he raised it, she gave him a smile that was a little sad around the edges before walking to the passenger door.

  She had nothing to be sad about. This wouldn’t be the last time they were together, and if he had his way, his home would soon be his mate’s.

  It felt like he’d been waiting forever for a woman he felt like this about to come along. And now that she had, now that he knew she was his mate, he didn’t want to wait. He wanted to claim her and begin their lives together.

  He’d wait as long as she needed. He wouldn’t be a prick and push her, especially not after learning what she’d been through.

  But once she was ready, he wasn’t wasting a single fucking second.

  Chapter 16

  Olivia

  “He’s a what?”

  Wincing at Carlie’s disbelieving shriek, Olivia repeated herself. “Cody’s a hybrid. Half vampire, half gorilla.”

  Her words seemed to echo around the living room, and she looked from face to face, gauging their reactions. Paisley showed no true emotion, just scrutinized her silently. Sierra was pale and looked like she might faint at any moment. Fiona was biting her lip, her brow wrinkled in a worried frown.

  And Carlie, despite her shriek a moment ago, had excitement and awe in her eyes.

  “Does this change the way you feel about him?” Paisley asked quietly.

  Not bothering to ask how Paisley knew she had feelings at all for him, she shook her head. “It doesn’t. He’s still just Cody. Just like we’re still who we are, despite the dragons living inside us.”

  Sierra looked at her, some of her color returning, but still looking far too pale. “But… but we’re just shifters. He’s part vampire. It’s a different thing entirely. How can you not be worried about falling for someone like that?”

  “Because I trust him,” she replied softly. “He’s still the same man he was before I found out. And from how he described it, his people didn’t retain much of their vampire side. They have even better night vision and speed than shifters do, and their animals look a bit different. But that’s it.”

  Sierra hugged herself. “You’re a lot braver than I am.”

  Carlie shook her head. “I think it’s cool as fuck. No one even knew the two sides could produce offspring. And we just happened to move to a town where a whole troop of them live. I like this place even more now.”

  Paisley rolled her eyes. “You would. Ladies, I know this news can be daunting, but if Olivia’s not worried, I’m not either. Besides, we’d be hypocrites if we judged them because of how they were born. How many shifters have lost their mates because they were humans who couldn’t accept what they were? This is no different.”

  Olivia nodded. “I agree. But… there’s also more.”

  Ignoring the trepidation on Sierra and Fiona’s faces, she quickly filled them in on what happened at the drive-in, and what Cody thought of it all. Shocked silence descended on the room after she was done, and she resisted the urge to wring her h
ands together as she waited on their reactions.

  Fiona was the one to break the silence, speaking up for the first time since they gathered at Olivia’s request. “And you’re just now telling us about this? Why didn’t you say anything last night? We all assumed the date went bad when you came home all quiet, but this is the real reason, isn’t it?”

  Guilt welled up inside her at her sister’s words. “It was partly from seeing Cody shift and what his gorilla looked like, and partly from what happened, yes. I didn’t say anything because, as freaked out as I was by everything last night, I knew I needed to talk to him and get more info. I thought at first that someone knew where we were and were coming for us, but once I knew what he is, I figured it was more likely that it was meant for his troop. Cody said the same thing.”

  Everyone stayed quiet, trading looks, and Paisley finally spoke. “I think y’all are probably right. No one knows we’re here. And I know what some of you are thinking. That it doesn’t matter that the threat’s directed at someone else. That it’s too close to us, so we need to leave. But I disagree.

  “Hear me out,” she continued as the others started murmuring uneasily. “We agreed that we weren’t hiding anymore. That we were going to stand our ground, no matter what. This is just the first test of our resolve. Running at the first sign of danger—especially danger that’s not even aimed at us—isn’t being strong like we all agreed to be. It’s the opposite. And I don’t know about you guys, but I don’t want to be weak. Not anymore.”

  “It might not seem like it, but I don’t either,” Sierra replied. “But staying could put us in the middle of someone else’s battle. We just got done fighting our own, and we’re still fighting the demons from that. Don’t we owe it to ourselves to find some peace and actually heal before we jump into another fight?”

  Carlie looked at Sierra as she spoke, her voice gentle. “The way I see it, yes, we’re fighting our demons—but we’re not the ones who fought the battle for our freedom. The Enforcers did that. So, don’t we owe it to ourselves to pay that forward and help someone else that needs it? Besides, Cody killed the men who were there. For all we know, they might have been the only people involved.”

  Paisley nodded. “I agree. And I also think if we run, that peace and healing we’re trying to find will be that much harder to attain. We’re fucking dragons, ladies. If there are more coming for Cody’s troop, we can help them win that fight. If we walk away and they’re hurt or killed because of it, how will we ever live with ourselves after?”

  The others were silent, and Olivia didn’t speak up either. She didn’t think she should. She had something amazing she was building with Cody, and she couldn’t be unbiased about this.

  One by one, the others nodded, some more reluctantly, and Paisley gave them a smile of approval. “It’s settled then. We stay.”

  Olivia shut her eyes as a dizzying wave of relief washed over her. Leaving was the last thing she wanted to do, but she hadn’t been sure she could stay if they left. She especially couldn’t let her sister leave without her.

  She didn’t even know if Cody was her mate. She would have thought her dragon would have told her by now if he was, but maybe she didn’t know it yet herself. Regardless, she wanted to see where things went with him.

  Because she was falling for him. Hard.

  Hell, there was no past tense. She’d already fallen, completely head over heels.

  Which meant she needed to have that talk with Fiona. Nerves overwhelmed her at the thought, because she didn’t know what direction it would go. She didn’t want to give up Cody, but she couldn’t lose her sister, either. Not again.

  Fiona will get over it if you keep seeing Cody. Remember what he said. You can’t live your life based on someone else’s feelings, her dragon said, her voice emphatic.

  But if it bothers Fiona… How can I do something that hurts her?

  She’s a grown woman. She can handle it. Besides, she should want you to be happy, and not only care about herself. But I think you’re worrying for nothing. She’ll be okay if you keep seeing him.

  Shocked, she shook her head slowly. Why are you being so harsh? I know you have a bond with her dragon. You should want what’s best for her, too.

  I do, her dragon replied softly. Which is part of why I think you should stop coddling her and let her take responsibility for herself. Stop living for her. Live for yourself. You never really have, and it’s time.

  Why now? You’ve never said any of this before, so I don’t know where this is coming from.

  I wanted to say it. I just didn’t think you were ready. You’re still not really there yet, but I have to make you understand now. Olivia… Cody’s our mate. You can’t let him go, even if Fiona doesn’t like it. You’ll never find the kind of happiness with another man that you’ll find with him. He’s perfect for you.

  She hadn’t thought it was possible to be more shocked than she was when her dragon first started talking, but she was very, very wrong. He’s… Cody’s my mate? How long have you known? Why didn’t you tell me?

  I’ve known from nearly the beginning. That was why I pushed you so hard to give him a chance. I didn’t tell you because you weren’t ready. You would have run as fast as you could, and there would’ve been nothing I could say to get you to give him a shot.

  And what about last night? You couldn’t have told me when I was freaking the hell out about what he is? Maybe I wouldn’t have run like I had if I’d known he was my mate!

  Oh yes, you would have, her dragon replied wryly. I know you inside and out, remember? You weren’t ready. Look, I’m not judging you. You went through hell, and you trusted no one after that. You needed time. Time to get to know him, time to come to terms with the fact that there really are good people still out there.

  And that’s why you’re telling me now? she asked skeptically.

  Yes. You accepted him today—all of him. And you came home ready to defend him to the other dragons. You know he’s a good man, so I knew you could trust that him being your mate is a good thing. You wouldn’t have believed that before.

  Pursing her lips, she thought about what her dragon was saying. And in the end, she reluctantly acknowledged that her animal was right. Knowing he was her mate wouldn’t have made a bit of difference in the beginning.

  Mates were revered, the one thing shifters longed to find in their lifetimes. Some never found them, never got to experience that sensation of completeness and total happiness.

  Olivia had always dreamt of finding her mate. But after what she’d gone through, she wouldn’t have trusted in it. She came out of her imprisonment believing there was no good left in the world, in people.

  She’d lost her faith.

  But since meeting Cody, her feelings had begun to change. He’d done that. He’d shown her there was some good in the world, and in people in general. That not everyone was evil.

  Despite what her dragon said though, she still thought she could have handled knowing the truth before she found out what he was. Her animal was wrong about that part. Because if she hadn’t already begun trusting in him, if she hadn’t already believed, down to her core, that he was good, she never would have gone with him earlier.

  Maybe, her dragon said. But that was the call I made. And a day of not knowing doesn’t make much of a difference in the grand scheme of things, does it?

  She rolled her eyes. I’m not going to validate your choice to hide something important from me, if that’s what you’re after.

  Fair enough. Just remember when you have that talk with Fiona how painful your existence will be if you give him up. I don’t think you’re giving her enough credit—but if I’m wrong, don’t give up your mate just so you can continue to coddle her. You’ve done enough of that over the years, don’t you think? And I can’t see that it ever really helped her.

  Ouch, she replied with a wince.

  The truth hurts sometimes.

  Shaking her head, she pushed her dragon’s voice
—and her unease at the thought that she was right about how she’d treated Fiona—away as she searched for her sister. She finally found her in the kitchen, and she did her best to smile as she approached her.

  “Hey. Do you think we could talk? Outside, maybe?” she asked, not wanting the others to hear.

  Fiona’s brow furrowed with concern. “Yeah. Is everything okay? You look worried. Is it Cody? Does what he is actually scare you?”

  Shaking her head, she followed her outside, not speaking until the door was closed behind them. “I need to ask you a question, and I need you to be honest with me, okay?”

  Frown deepening, her sister nodded. “Okay. What is it?”

  Inhaling deeply, she prayed for courage—to not only ask the question, but to do what was best for herself, no matter what answers she got.

  “Does it bother you that I’m with Cody?”

  Fiona froze, her green eyes widening. “It worries me that he’s a hybrid. It worries me that we don’t know for sure he can be trusted. I don’t want to see you get hurt, Liv. Was I that obvious?”

  Biting her lip, she hesitated as she weighed her sister’s words. “Yeah, kind of. The day he drove me home, everyone was all abuzz that he’d asked me out, but you left the room during the conversation and never returned. You were completely absent when they were helping me get ready for the date. And this morning, you seemed… well, you were smiling a little when you thought things might not have gone well with him, and then you were seemed off when I said everything was fine.”

  “I guess I wasn’t as subtle as I thought,” Fiona muttered, making her heart sink. Eyes widening, her head snapped up as she locked gazes with Olivia. “Wait. Do you think it’s because I’m jealous again? Is that really what you’re asking?”

  “The thought crossed my mind a time or two,” she admitted.

  Fiona immediately shook her head, the look in her eyes earnest as she spoke. “Oh, Liv, no. Look, I was a spoiled, jealous, bratty idiot in the past. I wasn’t content with what I had—and what I had was more than enough. No, I wanted everything you had, too. And I acted inexcusably toward you, and eventually, my actions led to our capture.”