Pride, Prejudice, and Push-Up Bras

by Mary Strand

  “You’re here to see...Charlie?”

  I raised my eyebrows. “You must be mistaking me for Jane. We don’t exactly look alike.”

  I grinned then, and he grinned back, so he might actually have a sense of humor. I hadn’t seen much of one so far, but, then, he’d always been around Stephanie, who tended to suck the humor right out of a room. I also wasn’t exactly eager to think Alex might be, well, cool. I didn’t want to like Alex. It wasn’t just that his last name was Darcy.

  It was something I didn’t want to think about.

  “Anyway.” I glanced up at him, trying not to notice how tall he was, how his hair curled slightly over his ears, or how something inside me took him so seriously. I took a deep breath. “I was looking for Rachel. Have you seen her around?”

  Alex looked puzzled for a moment. “I thought I saw her parents last weekend. Moving out. Carrying boxes.”

  “Rachel’s parents?” I shook my head. “No, they just moved in a couple of months ago, although they might still be getting rid of empty boxes.”

  Alex shrugged. “Could be. I haven’t actually spent much time here. Too busy with work, and I’ve had to fly back to New York a few times.”

  We were actually having a normal conversation, and Stephanie wasn’t interrupting, and somehow it left me...unsettled.

  I zipped up my jacket. “Well, I guess I’ll catch her another time. See you.” Or not. I turned to head outside.

  “Need a ride home?”

  I looked over my shoulder at Alex, who dangled the keys to his Lamborghini. I’d kill to ride in a Lamborghini.

  With anyone but Alex. “Thanks, but I like to walk.”

  I made it home, cold but safe from Alex, and found all my sisters huddled around the computer in Mom’s office, babbling about the invitation that Charlie had zapped to Jane and me for a party on Saturday. Wild Bill called out from upstairs that he’d join us. Poking my head into the living room, I shot a desperate look at Dad, who just rolled his eyes and held the newspaper up to his nose.

  I yanked the newspaper out of Dad’s hands.

  “What’s going on? Did you really give him a job? And even if you did, why is he staying with us?”

  Dad just chuckled and held out his hand for the newspaper. I dangled it even farther away.

  “I’m serious, Dad.”

  “Apparently.” He picked up a different section of the newspaper that he’d tucked to one side. “But you don’t need to worry. I’m just doing a favor for a friend.”

  “A friend? You never even heard of his dad before you got that email, and he’s probably not a relative.”

  “Some would say that we’re all brothers and sisters.”

  “Om to you, too.” I rolled my eyes. “If he’s our brother, why does he keep hitting on all of us? And maybe he is stealing from us. You don’t know him.”

  “He’s not a thief, Lizzie.” Dad started to look exasperated. “I took a cue from your mother and ran a Google search on him, then checked his references. Perhaps he might’ve had issues when he was sent to Sharmon, but I think they had more to do with neglect.”

  Great. Dad, who’d basically lost his savings and then opted for a low-income lifestyle, had decided to be charitable. To a stranger. “The next time you decide to save someone’s soul, could you maybe pick a guy we like?”

  I stalked to the couch, where I curled up in one corner and started planning how to boot Wild Bill’s butt out of our house for good. Dad obviously wouldn’t be any help.

  Bill dropped onto the couch next to me. “I can’t wait to go with you to the party.”

  “Sorry, but Charlie just invited Jane and me.” Groaning, I shook my head in disbelief. Lydia had already emailed Charlie—pretending she was Jane—to ask him to invite the circus guys, too. It was outrageous, sure, but that’s Lydia, and Charlie was too nice to say no. So I planned to spend the whole evening with Justin. We’d dance to something nice and slow, and I might even consider the closet option later in the party.

  Although I wasn’t sure about that.

  Bill squeezed closer to me, and I gave him an elbow.

  “But—”

  “It’ll be a big party. You wouldn’t know anyone.” I wouldn’t know too many people, either, but I still didn’t want Wild Bill there, let alone talking to me. Ew.

  Even as I reminded myself that Justin had been more than a handful the other night, I looked at Bill and knew I’d take a revved-up Justin over a lame-o Bill any day. If Wild Bill did show up, I’d find Justin and a closet the first chance I got. Just to avoid Bill.

  Crap. Justin or no Justin, I might spend the entire evening in the closet.

  Saturday night, I realized that all my sisters, plus Wild Bill, planned to crash Charlie’s party. That’s the problem with computer invites. Obviously, Charlie meant only Jane and me—I mean, he doesn’t even know Bill, and the younger three are in high school—but the invite wasn’t exactly clear, and Lydia wouldn’t have cared if it was.

  Well, no one was paying me to babysit. I grabbed the keys to the Jeep, mumbled something about checking on Rachel, and shot out of the house. Alone. Everyone else would have to pile into the Prius with Jane, but she’d left me high and dry so many times in the last few weeks, it was her turn to suffer.

  Jane caught up with me at the curb.

  “Don’t even think about it.”

  I glanced over my shoulder at her, then went back to unlocking the Jeep. “Actually, it’s a great idea. I don’t see why they have to come.”

  “Because Charlie—” Jane broke off and shook her head. “He just can’t say no.”

  “No wonder you’re so perfect together.” I grinned as I opened the driver’s door. Until Jane slammed it shut.

  “You’re not leaving me with those three. No, four.” Jane looked horrified, and I couldn’t blame her. “Liz, they won’t even fit in the Prius.”

  I shrugged. “Mary’s pretty skinny. Stick her in the middle in the back.”

  “Funny. But you can’t do this to me.”

  “Why not?” Memories of all the times Jane had done it to me since meeting Charlie flickered through my mind, and I started to get steamed. “No offense, but you’ve left me without a ride more than a few times lately.”

  Jane’s face was a mixture of annoyance and embarrassment, and I realized that this might be the first time we’d ever had a fight. If you could call this a fight. Jane wasn’t the type to raise her voice, let alone say anything nasty.

  Another reason why I loved Jane.

  I shrugged. “Tell you what. Let’s take the Prius and leave the rest of them here. I’ll keep the keys to the Jeep.”

  Jane rolled her eyes. “That’s not very nice. Besides, Lydia probably has a spare set of keys stashed somewhere.”

  “Which means we should get moving.”

  Jane headed to the Prius. “Get in.”

  We were both laughing as she pulled out from the curb.

  Five minutes later, we arrived at the condo building. Jane went up to Charlie’s right away, but I tried buzzing Rachel, then called her cell phone. No luck. Giving up, I took the elevator to the top floor, nervous about seeing Justin. I hadn’t seen him since Wednesday night, but I knew the circus troupe was deep in rehearsals. I hoped he’d be here tonight.

  Outside the condo, the hallway was jammed with circus performers. You could spot them by their bodies, gangly and loose and muscular all at the same time, and their wild clothes, which were a bit avant-garde for Woodbury. I looked down and sighed. Under my ski jacket, I’d worn a short jeans skirt and a yellow low-cut top, both from the Gap. They looked cute in the mirror at home, but compared to all the circus performers, I looked, well, blah.

  I spotted Rocco Molinari, and then...Lydia? How did she get here so fast? I rolled my eyes. Knowing Lydia, she’d taken off in the Jeep without Cat or Mary or Wild Bill, but I couldn’t really blame her. I’d tried to do the same thing.

  Lydia kept squealing the names of various circus
guys, only proving that she was fifteen and way too young to be here. I wandered over to a group of circus types just as Lydia asked Rocco the very thing I wanted to know: where was Justin?

  Rocco shrugged. “He left already.”

  I glanced at my watch and frowned. “Didn’t the party start, like, twenty minutes ago?”

  “Yeah, but—” Rocco glanced over his shoulder and quickly around the room. “I saw him talking to Charlie’s buddy, and next thing I knew, he was outta here. Looking pissed.”

  Had Justin been talking to Alex? They didn’t even know each other. My head spun, trying to come up with an explanation that made sense. But Alex and Charlie had argued last Saturday night, so why was I surprised that Alex had an argument with a complete stranger? He was good at it.

  As if his timing couldn’t be worse, Alex arrived at my side to offer me a drink. Pissed, I turned him down, even though I was dying of thirst, then strolled past Charlie and gave him a lukewarm glance. Not cold, exactly. After all, Charlie was Charlie. A fool for having Alex as a friend, but a springer spaniel of a fool. Cute when he wagged his tail.

  Trying to tamp down my irritation, I looked around for a friendly face...and found Rachel.

  I ran over to her. “Rachel? What are you doing here?”

  “I was invited.” She held a bottle of Corona in her hand, complete with a lime wedge stuffed in the neck of it, and looked at me like I was crazy.

  I was crazy? Rachel was the one who’d been missing in action for the last couple weeks. Rachel was the one drinking beer even though she was underage—which, okay, isn’t that big a deal, unless of course you’re caught—and she’d never even tried alcohol in her life.

  I stared at her. “No, I mean, where have you been? I’ve stopped by, called, emailed, and texted. What’s going on?”

  Rachel took a swig of her Corona as she glanced around the room, like I wasn’t even here. Then she started choking.

  I grabbed her beer and thumped her on the back, then pulled her to a corner of the room where everyone wouldn’t have to watch her try her very first beer.

  “Thanks.” She said it in a small voice, almost timid. It didn’t sound at all like Rachel, who could be quiet and caught up in her own world—usually the world of studying—but wasn’t actually shy.

  She also didn’t answer my question. The whole Alex-and-Justin thing was making me steam, but I didn’t want to talk about it when Alex might sneak up on me any moment. So I told her about Wild Bill, and Rachel laughed, and I actually started to feel better. So much better, in fact, that I didn’t notice when someone turned on the music and people started shuffling to a small patch of bare floor to dance.

  I didn’t notice, that is, until Bill grabbed my arm. Just like that, my night went from lousy to train wreck.

  The song didn’t exactly shout out for slow dancing, but Bill kept trying to pull me into a clinch. Not. He tripped over his own feet and mine, and stumbled into everyone else, spending more time apologizing than dancing. I felt every eye in the room on me, and probably a few eyes from down the block.

  The nightmare ended, thankfully, when Jane saw me freaking out, whispered something in Charlie’s ear, and went with him across the room. A flick of the wrist and the music shut off. A few people booed, but I took it as my chance to escape. By the time I reached the kitchen, the music started again.

  Come to think of it, I really like Charlie. Maybe I should let Jane date him.

  I grabbed a Diet Coke out of a cooler, then found Rachel again and started chatting. I glanced around, trying to make sure Wild Bill was occupied, but there was no sign of him. Whew. But I didn’t notice Alex sneak up on me. He tapped me on the shoulder and—with Stephanie nowhere nearby, let alone stapled to him—asked me to dance.

  I was so startled I said yes. Crap!

  Rachel whispered in my ear. “Be nice.”

  I was half-tempted to wipe the grin off her face, but Alex whisked me onto the dance floor, such as it was, just as Rihanna started belting out the white-hot “Umbrella.” Charlie was gyrating with Jane, and not necessarily in time to the music. I looked away—and into Alex’s eyes.

  Deep, chocolatey brown. Not black. I told myself he wasn’t as cute as Justin, who was a bit too wicked but straightforward about it. Jerk or not, Alex felt complicated, and I didn’t want complications. I had to remember that, especially when the music slowed and Alex tentatively pulled me into his arms. I caught a whiff of cologne on his neck, which was totally unfair. I’m a sucker for guys who smell so good.

  It felt like everyone was staring at me. Luckily, Alex is way taller than me, even though I’m five-eight and was wearing these really cool short black boots with heels. I decided to avoid the prying eyes, real or imagined, by burying my nose in Alex’s chest. Unfortunately, it meant I kept sniffing that yummy cologne and losing myself in the scent and in his arms. It didn’t help when he ran his hand over the small of my back in these tiny circles that made my mind go blank.

  He didn’t say anything. No shock there. The guy is smart enough to have figured out by now that when we talk, we fight. And no one likes to fight when they’re swaying to Coldplay singing “Fix You.”

  I finally tilted my head and looked up at him. “You know, most people talk when they dance.”

  He smiled. “I keep asking you to talk. You don’t want to.”

  “When did that ever stop you?” I frowned when his smile went wider. “I mean, you always want to talk about Jane.” I drew closer to whisper in his ear, which was a mistake. He smelled way too good. “About how you think she’s a stalker.”

  “Maybe I just want to talk to you.”

  “Doubtful. You don’t like me.”

  “I never said that.” He glanced down at my nose, and I wished, not for the first time in my life, that I hadn’t been born with a wild sprinkling of freckles across the middle of my face. Talk about looking twelve.

  “Believe me, I get it.” I pulled away from him for a moment before his arms reeled me back in. So much for my muscle tone—or willpower. “But I guess we could talk now, if it’s not about Jane or why you don’t like me or why you decided to break down and dance. I mean, everyone is watching. If you don’t say anything, they think you either hate your dance partner or are drunk or catatonic.”

  “You’re crazy, you know.”

  “But in a good way.” I pushed a lock of hair off my forehead. “Anyway. We’ve probably said enough to satisfy the crowd that you’re not catatonic.”

  “Or drunk or busy hating you.”

  “Uh, right.” Dang. The guy listened. “But I know you’re bugged about Pride and Prejudice.” I snorted, even though I was, too. “So we can keep the talking to a minimum.”

  His eyes twinkled. “What makes you think I want to?”

  “I—I just know.”

  Okay, I didn’t seem to know anything at the moment, and maybe I was confusing Alex with the Darcy of The Book. I’d spent the last two nights rereading it, ever since Jane had joked that Justin seemed a little like George Wickham in The Book. In other words, a liar and a player. The comparison rocked me, I had to admit, even though Justin is totally different. I mean, we’re talking Liam Hemsworth.

  Bottom line, I was more worried about Alex being the Darcy of The Book. Elizabeth married Darcy, and I can’t let something like that sneak up on me. I’m eighteen! I wasn’t about to admit it to Alex, though. He’d been annoyed since the moment the dreaded Bennet sisters showed up in his life.

  As we kept dancing, I glanced around and caught a glimpse of Wild Bill out of the corner of my eye, standing by himself and staring pathetically at me. Alex might be stuck-up and mute and a jerk to Justin, but he smelled good. Bill? Ew.

  The song finally ended, and I felt like escaping to the kitchen or bathroom or even the front-hall closet, but Alex chose that moment to look at Charlie and Jane. The two lovebirds’ heads bent together as they cuddled on the couch, and Jane was practically in Charlie’s lap—or as close to being in
his lap as she could be and still be Jane.

  Alex frowned slightly, then shook his head. “I forgot what we were talking about.”

  I shrugged even as Alex’s old worries about Jane stalking Charlie—as if!—started churning inside me. “Not much. We don’t like to talk to each other, remember?”

  Alex smiled again. There was something about his smile. Like he knew a secret and wasn’t telling. Or like he was imagining me in my underwear, except probably something racier than the cotton Jockeys I was actually wearing tonight.

  “We could talk about music.”

  I rolled my eyes. Leave it to Alex to talk about music when I’m thinking about underwear. “I doubt we listen to the same stuff.”

  “Yeah? I like the bands on your T-shirts. Grateful Dead. Coldplay.” He grinned suddenly. “Partridge Family.”

  I slugged him. I couldn’t help it. “I do not have a Partridge Family T-shirt.”

  “Joke!” Grinning, he pulled me back into a slow-dance clinch just as the latest slow song faded to nothing. When I frowned at him, he shrugged. “Sorry, but I had to lock in your arms to keep you from pounding me again.”

  “Cute.” He was, I had to admit, and more fun than I’d thought. Which meant I had to get out of here, fast. But Maroon 5 started blasting, and the whole Big Deal between Alex and Justin kept bugging me. “Can I ask you something?”

  He just shrugged.

  “So I’m wondering, does it take a lot to piss you off?”

  “What do you mean?”

  I gave a weak smile. “Just trying to figure you out. It’s an extra-credit project for one of my classes.”

  “Do you need a tutor?”

  My eyes widened. Now, if Justin had said that, I’d have a decent guess where he was headed. Like, to a closet. Alex, though, looked serious. As usual.

  I raised both hands in mock surrender. “Hey, I don’t expect to get an ‘A.’ I just can’t figure you out.”

  He tilted his head to one side, thinking about it. “Maybe you’ll just have to get to know me.”

  Someone called Alex’s name. After hesitating a moment, he gave me an odd smile and took off. Despite myself, I watched his butt as he crossed the room and headed over to Stephanie, who was standing by the door, coat on, as if she’d just arrived.