Escape

by Jay Crownover

  “I just want to know he’s okay. I want to make sure he’s not alone and that he’s getting everything he needs. You didn’t see him with his brother, Lane. They’re just kids. They have no idea what they’re doing.”

  She mentioned more than once she was worried Bauer was going to turn to hustling again if money got tight. To combat that possibility, she sent him a loaded Visa gift card once a week with a handwritten letter, telling him to use it for whatever he and Mikey might need. She was pretty sure Bauer was handing the cards over to his brother, but there was nothing she could do about it. She was stuck in an endless cycle, just like she was with her mother and sister. Luckily, Opal was turning eighteen in a few months, and my girl wouldn’t have to worry about paying for her sister’s wellbeing anymore. As soon as the younger Fox was of age, she was coming to live with us on the ranch until she started college in the fall. Opal had gotten a full ride to the University of Wyoming, so she was well on her way to freedom, relatively unscathed thanks to her older sister’s sacrifice and the generosity of Boyd Warner. Brynn was counting down the days till she no longer had to engage with her mother and her painful past in any way.

  Since coming home, the sisters were spending a lot of time together. They were always close, and Opal wasn’t a stranger by any means, but I silently wondered if Brynn was trying to fill the void left behind when Bauer refused to let her save him.

  “I think Bauer and even Mikey know more than most kids their age. You’re doing what you can, Brynn. You can’t force him to accept your help, all you can do is let him know that you are there and not going anywhere. I’m proud of you. You gave that kid something no one else ever did…you gave him hope. You changed his life forever. Because of you, he now knows what he could have if he’s willing to reach for it and that is a very powerful incentive for him to continue to make good choices.” I rubbed my hands over my face and rolled so I could prop myself on my elbow. “I need to shower and get down to the barn so I can get the horses ready.”

  I pulled her to her feet and guided her into the shower with me. I loved the way she looked as the water turned her hair dark and her skin into a slick honey-colored surface. Normally I would take advantage of her being naked and soft from our previous round of sex, but there was no time. All I could do was kiss her as she soaped me up and scrubbed me down. I returned the favor, lingering longer than I should have on her breasts and between her legs, after all, I was only human, and I’d wasted too much time pushing her away instead of pulling her close.

  I was watching Brynn braid her hair when her eyes met mine in the mirror. “You know that Cy asked Jack to help out with a couple of the rides to get all the canceled trips caught up. There’s a good chance you’re going to run into him sometime this week.”

  I wandered over to where she was sitting so I could bend down and drop a kiss on the top of her head. I knew Jack was still a sore subject with her. As soon as we got back to the ranch, she’d gone over to Ten’s property to properly apologize for the disastrous way she handled the proposal. She wanted to mend fences the best she could, but Jack told her that she should never have led him on. He accused her of being in love with someone else the entire time they were together, a charge she couldn’t refute. He made her feel like crap and sent her back to me in tears. Cy had to physically restrain me. Everything inside of me was screaming that I had to hurt the person who caused her any kind of pain. I was ready to throw down, ready to defend her honor even though I was still healing from the knife wound and rocking over fifty stitches on my side.

  My older brother pointed out that the reason Brynn and I went our separate ways so long ago was because I tried to fight her battles for her instead of standing by her and helping her battle through them. She was more than capable of handling not only Jack but anyone else who dared to question her motivations or the fact that the two of us belonged together. My older brother talked me off the ledge like he always did, and then informed me that Jack was sticking around despite having his heart broken and losing his woman to another man. In Cy’s eyes that said something about the other man’s character. I thought it made him annoying and problematic, but I was willing to look the other way when we had to work with one another.

  “I’m not scared of Jack.” I squeezed her shoulders and slapped my Stetson over my dark hair. The black strands were getting a little long and shaggy, but I liked the way Brynn tugged on them when she kissed me, so I was in no rush to cut it.

  “I know you aren’t scared of him, but I don’t think you realize how badly I hurt him and how much being around you is going to suck for him. Remember, you stopped talking to me and couldn’t even look at me for years when I turned down your proposal, and you didn’t even love me. Keep those memories in mind if he tries to push your buttons, Lane.” Strain made her voice raspy and thick. “I don’t want to be the reason two good men go after one another.”

  It was something she was clearly worried about, so I nodded and gave her my best reassuring grin. “You're wrong, I did love you, I was too scared to admit it back then. I’m not now. I love you, Brynn, and I know what it’s like to lose you. I’ll be good.” As long as he didn’t talk shit about her, I would be a perfect gentleman. If he said so much as one disparaging word about the woman who was the center of my life, I would make no promises, other than the one where I would rip his tongue out and choke him with it.

  She gave me a knowing look as I followed her down the hallway to the massive kitchen that served as the heart of the house as well as the starting point for most of our guests. Cy and Leo were already getting ready for their rides today. My older brother had grown up in a saddle the same way Sutton and I had, but he much preferred sitting behind a desk. The fact he was dressed to be out on the trail was a testament to how busy we were.

  His sassy bride-to-be was a born and bred city girl, but she had taken to ranch life like a duck to water. She left the boardroom and never looked back. From the minute she committed to Cy, she was all in, meaning all of us had taken turns teaching her what she needed to know to be a fully invested part of the business Cy built from the ground up to save our ranch. She was dressed to take her own group on a ride, and she looked cute as hell in a tilted straw cowboy hat sitting on top of her twin pigtails. She was the perfect match for my brother's chilly and reserved demeanor. I loved having her around, and I loved how readily she accepted Brynn and me as a couple.

  Cy was more reserved. He knew all about the challenges we would face when we decided to be together with the muddied history between us. He was also worried about what would happen if we couldn’t make it work. Brynn was an integral part of the ranch and the retreat business. She was the one who made this remote property feel like home for our guests from all over the world. Cy wanted both of us to be happy, but he didn’t want his family fractured. I tried to reassure him that Brynn and I were going to make this thing between us last forever, but we both knew that was a vow I had no control over. Anything could happen, and Brynn and I may very well fall apart. All I could do was work my ass off to make sure that didn’t happen.

  I kissed Brynn and gave Leo a good morning squeeze. I exchanged a rushed greeting with Cy as I hurried out the door to get ready for the day. The barn was already buzzing with activity. Webb had a family mounted up and was getting ready to ride them off into the mountains. We exchanged a friendly fist bump, and I shook my head when he asked if Brynn had heard from Bauer recently. He seemed as worried about the kid as we were.

  Jack was in the corral surrounded by a group of horses. He turned back when he saw me enter the enclosure. Luckily there weren’t any guests nearby to witness the tension between the two of us. It would have made for an awkward start to their adventure and with all the new competition cropping up at the neighboring ranches that wouldn’t be good for business.

  I brushed my horse down and spoke softly to her. She was going to work hard over the next week and needed some calm before the storm. I was snapping her bridle into place an
d rubbing down her strong neck when I felt a furious glare burning into the back of my head. Turning, I used a finger to tip the brim of my cowboy hat back and meet Jack’s angry eyes.

  We were dressed almost identically. His hat was tan where mine was dark gray. We both wore jeans, boots and thermal shirts under open flannels. Mine was black, his was white, which I guess was kind of fitting. I could see how I was the bad guy in his eyes. I stole his girl, even though she had been mine all along.

  “Thanks for helping out. We all really appreciate it.” I kept my eyes on his so there was no missing the unchecked dislike flooding his gaze.

  “Ten asked me to do it. I respect the hell out of that woman, and I like my job. I didn’t want to disappoint her. You, I owe nothing.” He crossed his arms over his chest and continued to glare at me.

  I sighed and used my forearm to wipe the sweat that had collected on my forehead. “You’re right. You don’t owe me anything, and I don’t owe you a damn thing either. I’m sorry you got hurt while Brynn and I were trying to figure our shit out. It’s not cool, but it can’t be undone either. If you’re gonna stick around, you need to get used to the way things are now, hell, the way they’ve always been. I was just too stupid to see it. We’re a pretty tight-knit group, so you’re gonna see us together, and you’re going to have to watch her love someone who isn’t you. I get that it sucks, and it’s not what you wanted, but it is what it is.”

  He growled low in his throat and took a threatening step toward me which made the horse at my back twitch nervously.

  “I wanted her the first minute I saw her. I could tell she was special, that she was good and kind, that she was made for this kind of life. I would have given her everything, and I never would have asked her to jump through hoops. You don’t deserve her.” He spat the last words out but fell back a step when my horse let out a high-pitched whinny and stamped her front hoof.

  Her horseshoe tapped the dirt in aggravation as I sighed and reached up to try and soothe her. My voice was calm and steady when I replied, even though my insides were raging and roaring to go toe to toe with the heartbroken cowboy. “You’re right, I don’t, but that never stopped her from picking me. I’m going to marry her one day.”

  Jack snorted and tossed back his head with an ugly laugh. “Good luck with that, Warner. She doesn’t want a ring.” The bite of her rejection obviously still stung. I knew that feeling intimately and understood his candor and his bitterness.

  I nodded in agreement. “You’re right she doesn’t want one, but she does want to give someone one, so when she asks me to marry her, I’m going to say yes and then I’m going to spend the rest of my life making up for lost time. It’s been me and Brynn from the beginning, and it’s going to be me and her at the end. It’s the middle that got all screwed up because I couldn’t recognize a good thing when I had it.”

  Jack watched me for a minute before grunting and taking another step away as he turned to face his mount.

  “You better hold onto the good thing you got, Warner. If you don’t, someone else will be waiting in the wings to snatch it up. Because if you fail this time, there won’t be another second chance.” I knew that. I was the only Warner who was going to get love right the first time around. I had to be because my first love was also my forever love… and I knew now that I was hers.

  I didn’t need to tell him I was never going to let Brynn go again because we both knew I wasn’t that stupid. She was mine. We belonged together, and that was the way it was always supposed to be. She was nothing like my mother, she loved this ranch, and she loved me.

  She wasn’t going anywhere, and I would make sure I gave her a new reason to stay with me every single day.

  Chapter 18

  Brynn

  Heaven or Hell

  I used to look forward to Lane going out on rides with the guests. It meant we didn’t have to tiptoe around each other and I was able to breathe because there was a break in the suffocating awkwardness that always seemed to surround us. It also meant I wouldn’t have to hear his current bed partner calling his name as his headboard slammed against our shared wall, and I didn’t have to pretend not to notice them sneaking out the next morning. Those were the only nights I managed to sleep soundly. But now that he was mine and I spent every night since we returned home wrapped around him, leaving no room for anyone else, I missed him. I missed that naughty grin and the way his bright blue eyes twinkled with mischief. I missed his low laugh and the way his hands always seemed to be drifting over my ass inappropriately. I missed him riling Cy up and his joking around with Leo as she worked to calm her grouchy man down. Everything felt too quiet and still without him around. It made me restless and gave me way too much time to think.

  I tried not to obsess that I hadn’t heard from Bauer in over a week. He was pretty good about answering my calls and checking in with me regularly. He always sounded happy to hear from me, even though I could tell he wasn’t exactly thrilled with his circumstances. His brother was working two part-time jobs and going to school. Mikey was also an eighteen-year-old on his own for the first time, so there was a fair amount of partying and hooking up going on. There was no way Bauer would ever say a disparaging thing against his older brother, but I got the impression Mikey’s lifestyle wasn’t exactly conducive to giving his younger brother a stable, secure home life. I could hear the longing in his voice when he talked about having a quiet place to sit and think.

  The fact he hadn’t answered the phone or returned any of my messages was making me anxious and without Lane around to talk me down, I imagined every worst-case scenario possible. The last thing I wanted was Bauer back on the streets. I didn’t want him to run again. I might not like the fact he picked what his brother had to offer over the opportunity I presented to him, but at least I knew where he was and could normally get a hold of him. If he took off again, there would be no end to the ways I would worry, and I would sink every dime I had into trying to find him. I refused to let him disappear into the wind again. My sister told me I was obsessing over his safety the same way I worried myself sick over hers. I couldn’t argue with her, and I couldn’t stop the feelings from consuming me.

  I looked up from the dough I was kneading as Leo walked into the kitchen. Her freckled nose was sunburned, and her strawberry-blonde hair was pulled up in a curly mess on the top of her head. She was a solid five inches shorter than I was, but she carried herself with such confidence and poise that she often seemed larger than life. When she first showed up at the ranch with Emrys, I figured they were nothing more than the typical rich-bitch city girls looking for an adventure and a roll in the hay with a hot cowboy. There were photos of Cy, Sutton, and Lane on the ranch's website, and their pictures were also plastered all over the vacation literature. The Warner brothers and their rugged good looks did more for business than the wild Wyoming landscape ever could. When Leo turned out to be just as prickly and stubborn as Cy, it was a refreshing change of pace. She refused to let the stoic, sarcastic cowboy roll over her and gave as good as she got. The fact she was able to melt some of Cy’s icy walls he kept around his heart was a miracle, and I would be forever grateful she had given one of the greatest men I’d ever known reason to smile again.

  “How was your tour?” Leo only went out on the range with families and all-girl groups. Cy insisted. We were too isolated, and the property was too large and remote for anyone to react quickly if a problem arose. He refused to let her go out with a group of men when she could so easily be outnumbered and overtaken. At first, Leo’s feminist instincts had bristled at the demand, but eventually, she gave in, realizing it wasn’t worth the fight when Cy had a point, and making him worry would mean he wasn’t concentrating on his end of the business. He merely had to remind Leo of their own clusterfuck they’d barely survived out in the wilderness the first time she stepped foot on the ranch.

  The petite redhead pointed at her face and wrinkled her nose. “Good except I forgot sunscreen. I’m going to turn into
one giant freckle at this point.” She was as fair as most redheads were and already had a liberal smattering of freckles across her nose and cheeks. It was a good look for her.

  “They’re cute. I bet Cy likes them.” I tossed the dough into a bowl and set it aside, moving to the sink to wash the flour off my hands. She gave the concoction a curious look and lifted her eyebrows in question. “I’m making chicken pot pie for dinner tonight. That’s the crust.”

  She hummed and rubbed her tummy with an exaggerated motion. “I’ll need to order a wedding dress a size bigger than I usually wear now that you’re back home. I can’t believe I used to live on takeout and delivery. Home cooking is so much better.”

  I laughed and felt a blush rising in reaction to her praise. “Did you already find a dress?” There was no way she was going to find what she was looking for in Sheridan. She was going to have to go down to Casper, or Cheyenne, or even farther down to Denver to get something special.

  She shrugged letting her shoulder drop carelessly. “I’ve looked around online, but nothing is jumping out at me. I want to make sure everything about this wedding is as different from Cy’s first wedding as possible. I don’t want him to have flashbacks.” She wrinkled her nose again and rolled her eyes. “Plus, we have time.” They weren’t having the wedding until well after Emrys gave birth, and she was only six months along at the moment.

  “This wedding won’t be anything like the last one. You’re doing it here at the ranch, right?” I felt guilty that I wasn’t more involved. I’d been so caught up in my own drama that I hadn’t been a very good friend, which made me cringe. Leo and Emrys were the first women who had accepted me with open arms even after hearing all the terrible rumors about me and in Leo’s case, after mistakenly thinking I was Cy’s wife. They both had been wonderful to me and showed me what real female friendship was all about. I should have been more invested in both the wedding and the baby.