Clandestine Royal

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Clandestine Royal Page 7

by Gigi Thorne


  I eyed my keeper as I walked into the stable. “Hello, Garrison.”

  “You will keep your legs shut. I’ve seen the way you look at him and you have no business giving away what needs to be earned.”

  My cousin glared at me as I led my horse to the carriage. He was always quick to confront me on circulating rumours in the palace. I’d never seen him so angry.

  “I don’t understand why you concern yourself with me so much. You were advisor to the Queen, what more of a position could you desire?”

  He ran a hand through his silver hair, his black beady eyes following my every move. “I have a hand in much more than you know, and you should be aware that Luke is not the only one in line for the throne. Don’t be so quick to give away your virtue for false assumptions.”

  I squared my shoulders. “I’m in love with Luke, not his position for the crown.”

  “Your mother raised you for this purpose.”

  “And you made sure of it!”

  “Who do you think paid for your education, your tutors, your fucking fancy clothes! You will hear me, girl!” He took a threatening step forward and backed me into the stall door. Teeth bared, he gripped my face firmly in his hand. “You will mind yourself with Luke and give other suitors the benefit of your company. That’s not a lot to ask. I’m looking out for you and your future.”

  “And your agenda,” I scoffed.

  “You’ll do what I say, Sarafina.”

  “Or what, you’ll take my education away, or these rags?” I ripped at my blouse while he screamed out enraged as he moved towards me. In a flash, Garrison’s back was to the stall door beside me as Luke stared him down with the devil in his eyes.

  “It’s going to be a very fucking bad day for you if you speak another ill word to her. YOU are no longer the man in her life, that is now my position. I’m not in love with her education or her clothes, I’m not in love with the fact that she knows which fucking fork to use at dinner. I’m in love with her spirit, her heart, and my name falling from her lips. She is my future, so I dare you to say one more fucking cross word about my life and to interfere with us a minute more. I will end you.” He let go of him abruptly, not checking his face for a reaction as he turned his back to Garrison, gripped my hand and spoke low, “Don’t look back queen, only forward.” The mix of anger, pride and love shining in Luke’s eyes in that moment told me all I needed to know. Luke was born my king no matter his station. He would forever rule my heart.

  I pulled up to the cottage just as the rain began to disperse and saw him sitting on his porch. He stood abruptly when he saw me through the windscreen. Afraid of his reaction, I jumped out of the SUV, scurried to the back seat and collected Callum and his nappy bag. He wiggled in my arms as Luke’s dark brown eyes scoured the two of us from where he stood, motionless on the porch.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t ring first, but I wanted to—” I fumbled in the thick mud between us and the baby and I went down. Callum giggled loudly in my arms as I looked down at him covered in thick mud. We both giggled, and I glanced over to Luke who looked momentarily stunned before he shot off his porch to help us. Callum was still laughing while Luke blinked repeatedly as if he couldn’t believe we were there. I took it as a good sign as I spoke.

  “We’re both filthy.”

  “Obfithy,” Callum repeated as he looked over to Luke. His blonde hair saturated in mud. There wasn’t an inch of him that was clean.

  “Can we possibly come in and clean up?”

  Luke stood immobile, his jaw granite as his eyes seared into mine before he jerked his chin for us to follow.

  I trailed him to the front door and paused.

  “We can stay out here, I don’t want to ruin your floors.”

  Luke disappeared and then quickly emerged from one of the rooms with two towels.

  For the first time since I left him at the opera he spoke. “Strip him out there, you can undress too. I’ll get a bath running.”

  I stripped Callum down and out of his nappy and rid myself of my muddied clothes until we were both shivering on the porch. After retrieving a wipe from his nappy bag to get some of the mud off, I peeked into the cottage and saw not much had changed.

  “The place looks the same,” I said projecting my voice so he could hear us from the bathroom. “For some reason, I thought you would have modernised it or—” Luke appeared sucking the words from my mouth as I finally got a good look at him. He was dazzling in casual jogging bottoms and a t-shirt. He looked healthy and more fit. My mouth went dry at the sight of him.

  “Bath’s ready, you remember where?”

  “I remember,” I repeated as Callum wiggled in my arms in an attempt to get down.

  Sensing my struggle, Luke offered a hand. “I’ll take him, you can get in the shower in my bedroom. I left a robe on the bed.”

  “Thank you,” I said as he moved towards me and extended his arms towards the baby. My heart seized at the sight of it and I pushed the tears away as Luke took Callum in his arms.

  “You and your mother made quite the entrance, buddy, though for her it’s nothing new. You want to take a bath?”

  Callum remained quiet, nodding in fascination as he studied Luke to make sure he was one of the good guys. Little did my son know, he was one of the best guys. Tears began to multiply as I raced through the house to get to the shower, my heart beating on my sleeve as I prayed under the water.

  Thirteen

  Luke

  Seeing her was like taking a bullet to the chest. And with her son in tow, it was almost too much to bear. The initial shock still hadn’t worn off as I put Callum in the bath. He looked exactly like her, hair colour, eye colour, her nose, lips, and chin. She had a son and he was beautiful. His smile was everything I’d missed, and I felt my heart crack with the weight of it. Remington had helped to sort me out the first couple of months but had left to live his life. I couldn’t blame him. The first two months were the hardest. The worst of it was trying to get sober all the while knowing the love of my life was having my enemy’s baby. As I stared at Callum, I couldn’t feel anything but wonder. His smile, his innocence, he seemed to be the one good thing that came out of the whole sordid mess. I could only pray his father didn’t corrupt him.

  “Want some bubbles, little guy?” I pulled the lavender bubble bath from underneath my sink and poured some in the running water. Callum let out an excited shriek when they began to dance in the air around him. He spoke gibberish to me as I flicked the foam his way and he rocked back and forth as if there was music playing. I pulled out my mobile phone and played something PG he could groove to. Within minutes he was cracking me up.

  “You two look cosy.” Sarafina’s voice sounded behind me and I turned to her.

  “He’s beautiful.”

  “He is.”

  “He favours his mother.”

  I kept my eyes on Callum, unable to handle any rejection on her part.

  “Fina, why did you come here today?”

  She hesitated a moment. “Are you well?”

  I couldn’t help my ironic laugh. “I’m well enough.” I finally braved a look her way and inhaled her beauty. She was covered in my robe which seemed so oddly fitting and at the same time gave me an inkling of hope I had no right to feel.

  I tore my eyes away and handed her the towel as she pulled her son from the tub. “He’s getting fussy, do you mind if I put him down?”

  I shook my head at a loss.

  She rocked Callum in an old chair that I’d repurposed since I’d been back at the cottage. Wood work had become something of a hobby as I spent over a year isolated away from the world I knew.

  “Have you…” Sarafina started and then paused. “I have no right to ask but have you been…”

  I raised a brow.

  “Why is this so hard?” She swallowed. “I used to be able to look at you and you would know what I was thinking.”

  I did my best to hide my smile. “No, Fina, I haven’t been with anyon
e. I’ve been busy.”

  “Busy?”

  “Whittling.”

  She glanced around the cabin. “Whittling wood?”

  I smirked. “This doesn’t impress you?”

  “Of course it does, it’s just...”

  “Not quite as desirable as running a country? I agree, but I get a little satisfaction of knowing I accomplished something.”

  “Luke, I didn’t mean to imply anything by that, I just—do you have anything to drink?”

  “Water or tea?”

  “Something stronger?”

  I shook my head. “Sorry, no.”

  Mouth parted, she looked on at me as if she were seeing a ghost. “You stopped drinking?”

  “Yes, amongst many other things. I’m… working a program.”

  Her face paled. “I’ve done this to you, I did that, didn’t I?”

  “You didn’t do anything.”

  She hung her head. “I did so many things.”

  “And I would have done the same for you. I numbed myself, but you, you were so much stronger. That’s where I failed you, I didn’t realise how strong you were, Fina. This isn’t your fault, it’s not mine either. We were young, selfish and made stupid choices, trusted the wrong people and we didn’t trust each other enough... I didn’t trust you enough.” I swallowed as the unbearable spark began to brew between us. “Fina—”

  “I’m here because before we fell in love, we were friends. Do you remember that? The time where things weren’t so complicated. Where we could just talk nonsense and everything else made sense,” she swallowed hard as she stroked Callum’s back. “I’ve missed that. We, the three of us, had nothing more than each other and that was plenty. I’ll forever be sad we lost that. We all got lost.”

  I nodded. “Things changed, people change.”

  “Clearly you have,” she whispered before placing a kiss on the baby’s head. “You look so well.”

  “And you’re a mother,” I said, studying the baby. He startled for a moment in his sleep, his foot kicking out from under the towel.

  “He’s perfect, isn’t he?” My heart lodged as she stroked his foot softly with her fingers. My throat lined with chalk as I stared at his third toe in utter disbelief. I looked up to see Sarafina’s eyes fill. “God, how I wanted to punish him,” she said softly. “I knew exactly what I was doing when I asked you to the garden and exactly how Alex would react. He stole our life together, but he didn’t steal everything. We have this, we have him.” Her tears fell rapidly. “Our fairytale is dark and full of deceit, but he is the light, he’s worth all the pain of losing you.”

  My vision blurred as she nodded in answer to the unspoken question in my eyes. “He is yours, Luke, in every sense, and I couldn’t wait another day, hour, or minute to tell you.”

  Moisture covered my face as she looked on at me.

  “You never lost me. Not a day, not a minute, not a second.”

  I knelt at her feet. “I’m so ashamed of how I spoke to you, of the way I acted. I’ll never forgive myself. I love you so fucking much, Fina, I fucked up. I should have believed you. I was destroyed by the loss of you. Forgive me.”

  “Nothing to forgive,” she gasped out before our mouths met. My kiss was full of love, need, and regret and I took and took until we were both gasping for air. Once we parted, I whispered one word over her lips. “Eternal.” She let out a breath of relief between us.

  “Why didn’t you come to me sooner?”

  “I had to make sure Callum was safe, if Alex even suspected he was yours, I didn’t know what he would do. I also wanted to secure his place as prince. One of you deserves your place to rule. I knew once an heir was announced there would be no turning back. Alex is too prideful to humiliate himself that way. Appearances mean too much to him. That’s why I had to plan it just right.”

  “You planned this?”

  She nodded. “As best I could with his ruthlessness and your pride and temper. With you, I used nothing, and before he set foot near me, I made sure I was protected.”

  I sat back on my heels stunned at just how brave she’d been to defy him, to seek vengeance for the both of us. “As hard as it may be for you to hear, I learned quite a bit about fertility when Alex and I couldn’t conceive after we were married. I spent so much effort just trying to get you to look at me and when you did, I took a chance and prayed and well” —she gave me a serene smile—“here he is.”

  I watched the rise and fall of Callum’s chest, my son, a prince. “Does he know now?”

  “No,” she whispered, her voice etched with worry. “I wanted to leave that up to you.”

  I gripped my baby’s foot. “He’ll only suffer for it.”

  She looked at me pointedly. “Then don’t tell him.”

  Fear swept through me at the idea. “I’ll miss everything.”

  “You don’t have to. Come back to London.”

  “I can’t watch him father my child.”

  “That’s where you’re wrong. You can suffer anything for him. Because I do, for you. Look at how much pride has cost us. But he’s starting to speak, he’s talking, and I can’t bear for him to call that man his father.”

  Heat began to stir in my veins. “He stole my life.”

  “No, your life is here, in this room. And we are forever yours. Don’t look back, only forward.”

  Adele sang “One and Only” from my mobile and I stood in front of her as she looked up to me with matched longing. I pulled her and my sleeping baby from the chair and held them both in my arms while Sarafina cried softly. We swayed back and forth, our hearts beating in sync for the first time in years.

  I pressed my lips to her ear before I made her one last promise. “I’ll be better, I’ll be worthy of your love. This time I’m not letting you go. Please believe me. Believe in me.”

  She shook her head as if to bat away my apology. “Can’t you see, stupid man, I never stopped.”

  I cradled her face, shaking from head to toe with renewed faith and kissed her long and hard, the taste of her tears setting a fire like I’d never known racing through my veins. I pulled back from her, my thoughts racing as Sarafina exhaled, her eyes lighting in recognition. “Welcome back my king.”

  Fourteen

  Alex

  I’d just sat down to eat, my plate covered in the finest rare meat, fit for a king. It was hard work, but I prided myself on a job well done. After years of the burden, I finally had some satisfaction with the work after years of scrutiny from the public. They’d even go so far as to speculate on my build, which I was working hard to remedy. Appearance was everything and I needed to continue to reign with an iron fist while slowly squashing their never-ending and judgmental wagging chins. I’d been careless my first few years as king, but since Callum had been born, I’d made sure he had nothing to account for where his father was concerned. All childish things pass away eventually and while it was unnatural to make a king so young, I couldn’t picture anyone else fit for the job. I’d just cut into my first bite of meat when I caught sight of Luke in my peripheral. Instantly, I looked for my guard, Jared, who’d seemed to have gone missing. No doubt a ploy from Luke to keep me on my toes. I forked a thick bite of steak and shoved it in my mouth, chewing deliberately slow before I spoke.

  “What the fuck are you doing here and where is my wife?”

  “Hello, Alex, it’s been a while,” Luke said, giving me his infuriating smirk.

  “Fuck you, where is Sarafina?”

  “She’s busy.”

  “Busy doing what? Is she counting the crown jewels? You know for all you saw in her, I can’t imagine what it was. She’s rather boring.”

  “Eat your meat, you fucking pig, we have much to discuss.”

  My silver clanked against my plate and I stood. “I’ll have your fucking tongue for that.”

  “Will you?” he drawled unaffected. “This isn’t medieval times.”

  “No, but at the drop of a hat, I can make sure it seems t
hat way, for you.”

  “Save your threats, cousin, you’re shit at them. Maybe that’s why you decided to forgo them and come straight for my throat?”

  He slid a mobile phone over the table at me.

  I didn’t glance at it as he spoke again. “They are leaving, with me, today, and you’re going to let them go.”

  “You dare come to me with demands? Have you forgotten who I am?”

  “It seems to me you’ve forgotten who you are, Alex, just some fucking skinny underdog who bullied his way to the throne, nothing more.”

  “I am your king!”

  “You aren’t even a man!” Luke growled, balling his fists as if ready for war. He thrust his chin out towards the phone and spoke through gritted teeth. “Take a look.”

  “Whatever it is, it’s not going to affect me.” I sat back with my forearms on the table. “You are in no position to threaten me.”

  “Did you think for one second I was going to let you get away with it. You forget who the fuck I am. The. Original. Bad. Guy. You aren’t untouchable, Alex. You’re a fucking joke of a king and everyone knows it. This will be the last nail in your coffin.”

  Luke stared me down, the chill in his voice too confident to ignore.

  “She’s my wife, Luke, and the Queen. You can’t just take her.”

  “You’ll divorce her immediately. Claim infidelity and blame me to protect your shit reputation. I don’t care. We’ll weather the storm. I don’t care how bad you tarnish our reputation as long as Callum doesn’t get hurt.”

  “You won’t take my son,” I hissed as I gripped his mobile phone in my hand and pushed play. It took seconds to recognise what I was seeing, and I slammed the phone on the table between us.

  Sweat gathered on my forehead as I thought of the implications of what he had. “If I divorce her, then what, you’ll raise Callum? You think because you fucked her first, you’re somehow entitled to the entirety of my family?”

  Bile rose in my throat as he remained quiet.

 

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