Catwalk
Page 18
Even so, I still think Benjamin’s guilty. I realize I’m probably more judgmental than most when it comes to drinking and driving, but I think anyone who gets behind the wheel after consuming alcohol should be locked up for a while. Really, what could it hurt?
And I’m not sorry that Paige is keeping her distance from Benjamin now. Oh, she talks to him on the phone sometimes. I call them mercy chats. Mostly she’s worried that he’s feeling depressed. Hey, he should be depressed. A young woman is dead because of him. He can claim it’s Mia’s fault, but he was the one driving that night. It’s not like I hate him or anything. I really don’t. In fact, I pray for him every day. I just don’t think he should get off too easily. That’s all I’m saying.
Thinking all this, and because I’m stuck in traffic that’s not budging an inch, I decide to give Blake a quick call, since I know he met with Benjamin this morning. They’ve actually been doing a Bible study together. I’m not sure if Benjamin is taking it seriously or just hopes that it will improve his bad boy image, but it sure won’t hurt him to hear some truth either.
“Old Ben was pretty bummed today,” Blake tells me. “Mia’s parents have launched what feels like a full-blown smear campaign. They’re talking to publicists and any press that will listen, trying to make Benjamin out to be a murderer who’s about to get off scot-free.”
“That’s not so far from the truth.”
“But Erin, they’re even comparing him to OJ Simpson. It’s like they want him ruined forever. It might even crush his movie deal.”
I feel my fingers tightening on the steering wheel, which is pointless since the car isn’t even moving. I let go and take in a deep breath. “Okay, I’ll admit the OJ thing seems harsh. But it’s true that some celebrities beat the rap simply because of their names. It irks me when I see one going off on his merry way like, no big deal. That’s just not fair. Maybe losing the movie deal is for the best.”
“What about what Jesus said about not throwing stones?” he asks me.
I consider this. “Yeah, I know…and you’re right. But I still think Benjamin should assume some blame for—”
“He knows that he’s partly to blame and he wants to admit it. But his attorney is counseling him to continue proclaiming his innocence.”
“See, and that bugs me. Maybe if Benjamin took some responsibility for the accident, Mia’s parents would let up on him.”
“Maybe…” Blake sounds discouraged.
“I’m sorry, Blake, I don’t mean to get on my soapbox. Sorry I sound so negative. I know it’s not fair for me to take it out on poor Ben. I really do feel sorry for him and it’s cool that you’re spending time with him.” I peer down the freeway with four lanes of immobile traffic as far as I can see. “It doesn’t help that I’m stuck on I–5, and you know how aggravated I get. Patience is not my strong suit.”
“Where you headed anyway?”
“I was supposed to pick up some flowers for my mom. Paige is giving her an authentic Parisian dinner tonight.”
He laughs. “To make up for leaving her home?”
“Yeah, and we have to watch To Catch a Thief with her too, since it’s a film that’s set on the Mediterranean.”
“Man, how many French movies have you girls watched already?”
“Too many.” To pass the time, I actually start to list the films. “I really liked Amelie,” I admit. “And La Vie en Rose was amazing, but it was kind of a downer too. Paige’s all-time favorite is still Funny Face. And any other film with her favorite fashion icon—Ms. Hepburn. We watched Charade and even Sabrina, which is only partially set in Paris.” I notice some of the brake lights flashing and I realize that cars are starting to move. “I better hang up,” I say quickly. “Thanks for keeping me company in the traffic jam. Please don’t take what I said about Benjamin too seriously. I really do care about him.”
“I know you do. And if it’s any comfort, I agree with a lot of what you said. But Benjamin needs friends more than accusers right now.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” I say good-bye and hang up as I put the Jeep into gear. After snarking and going on about DUIs, I’m fully aware that driving while talking or texting on the phone or while doing a lot of other distracting things, like eating, is just as dangerous as driving while intoxicated. After all, I’ve given Paige that same lecture more than once when I’ve caught her putting on mascara or lip gloss while she’s driving. Although I’ll admit I haven’t noticed her doing it lately.
Once again I’m reminded that my role on our show might be more expendable than I realized. It might be written out even sooner than I expected. Perhaps it’s right around the corner. Because I’m fully aware that On the Runway does not need Camera Girl to make it a success—Paige Forrester is what makes the show so popular. Sometimes, like right now, I worry that I’m just an unnecessary distraction. Extra baggage. Another expense. Really, the show would be perfectly fine without me.
And here’s what’s really weird, especially when I remember how much I whined about being hijacked into reality TV back in the beginning. The truth is that I would not be perfectly fine without the show. I really like being part of it. I’m actually learning a lot about film and production—much more than I ever would’ve learned by now in film classes. And I love being with Paige. I don’t even mind being called Camera Girl or even Jiminy Cricket that much. What I do mind is not being needed anymore. That seriously worries me.
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Copyright
ZONDERVAN
Catwalk
Copyright © 2010 by Melody Carlson
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Table of Contents
Cover Page
Title Page
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
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