And Manny Makes Three: Gay Romance
Page 26
"And Valentine’s day and Easter?"
"Yes."
"What about for Al’s high school graduation? College graduation? His wedding?"
"Yes," Zack said, resigned to the questioning.
"As a family friend? As someone who gets an invitation in the mail?" Mark kept pushing with no mercy.
"No." Zack frowned at the thought that Mark would be out of his life and need to be invited. He had to be there for all of it. That was the only option.
"And do you want me in your bed every night?"
"You know I do."
Mark didn’t say anything more. He didn’t need to.
"I see what you’re getting at," Zack admitted. "Yes I want you in my life and Al’s life. I want you in every way I could ever want someone. And no, I don’t want to think of any of those days without you. Or any day without you. OK. You’re right. I can’t give you up. Now stop using the Socratic Method on me."
"Why when it’s working."
"And if I ask you all those questions, how..."
But Mark didn’t even let him finish asking.
"Yes to all of the above. I know what I want. You’re the holdout," Mark accused him.
Zack covered his face with his hands.
"Just admit how much you need me," Mark demanded.
"You don't need me."
"Ok. Maybe I don't need you. But someone exactly like you. You have any identical twins or clones of yourself lying around?"
"I am too old for you, and I have a kid." Zack was going to say more but Mark jumped in.
"You do? You talking about Al? I think I've met him once or twice, just in passing."
Zack smiled at his sarcasm.
"I don't see why I should give you up just because you're an idiot," Mark said.
"You're being kind of aggressive," Zack pointed out.
"I have to be, or I'll get left in the dust. You'll go off with some doctor or a lawyer while I get left sitting on the side of the road."
"I'm not going to leave you on the side of the road," Zack said though he laughed at the image.
"Are you going to dump me when I stop being useful?"
Zack's answer was an emphatic "No!"
"Then why are you resisting me?"
"Because you are young, and you deserve your freedom and to have fun and to live a little."
"What, like, sleep around, go to clubs to pass some test of life experience then you'll have me?"
"No! That's not what I'm saying." Zack hated the thought of it even though it was exactly what he had just told him to do.
"You're saying you don't trust my judgment to know what I want," Mark summed up.
"I trust your judgment."
"Just not about you. Somehow you have blinded me with your irresistible charms, and I've lost my head," Mark said resorting to sarcasm again.
"OK, now you're just being mean. And stop speaking for me."
"Try making some sense, Zack, and I won't have to. I mean does your reasoning even make sense in your own head?"
"Until you start poking holes in it, yes, it does. Kind of."
"You're just afraid."
"Yes, I am. OK. Here's a reason you can't contradict. Where will you be in two years? Five years? Here with us? Maybe but maybe not. Al and I will be here, and I will have to explain to Al why you aren't with us any more."
As he heard him say that Mark looked really sad. To answer him, he didn’t make any empty promises.
"OK. I can't guarantee anything. But no one can. You think there is someone out there who can guarantee you that they'll be here in two years or ten?"
"No," Zack had to say.
"But you aren't really looking, are you?" Mark gave him another sad look.
"No, I'm not."
"So it's not me versus some ideal guy. It's me versus nothing."
Zack was lost in thought for a minute. He wanted to give Al a stable environment, but then he thought about Mark leaving after being part of their lives. Either he and Mark would be together and maybe break up in the future, and Mark would leave. Or he and Mark would never get together, and Mark would leave. There was no way to guarantee a win. It wasn't that kind of game. But Zack was so used to denying himself that he didn't know if he could let even someone as wonderful as Mark into his life with Al.
"I don't know what to think any more," Zack confessed.
"Here's something to consider. Only one of us is confused," Mark pointed out.
"So the one who isn't confused gets to decide?"
"No, lets have the guy who doesn't know if he's coming or going make all the decisions."
"Hey," Zack objected weakly.
"You are deciding for both of us. For all three of us. And I don't think you're equipped. You're too afraid."
"You're not the boss of me."
"We can't have a serious conversation, can we," Mark said like it was a bad thing.
"Good. Who the hell wants to have a serious conversation?"
"Then just throw in the towel already so we can finish up with this drama crap and get on with the good stuff," Mark told him.
Zack could tell that Mark was worried that he wasn’t getting through to him, and maybe even that he never would.
"Stop looking so sad, you're killing me," Zack told him.
"Let me be happy then."
"You think I can make you happy?"
"When you aren't being an ass, yes, you make me happy."
Zack laughed.
"I forgot about that. The whole happy thing."
"You mean you didn't plug that into your equation?"
"I think I might be losing this argument," Zack said as Mark frowned at him, afraid to hope. Zack could feel the urge to struggle against being happy leaving him, the bindings loosening. Maybe he was free to be with Mark. Maybe there was nothing real standing in the way, just his stupid anxieties and those were losing power and letting go of him.
"OK. Let's be happy," Zack decided.
Now Mark laughed a surprised laugh of the unexpected winner. He stared at Zack waiting for some confirmation. Zack grabbed him and kissed him making all the questions disappear. Then he looked into Mark’s eyes looking for signs of happiness. He found happiness written there but also something he would call love if he dared.
"Now we celebrate with sex right?" Zack said.
"Nah. I think I want to get some sleep," Mark said even going so far as to get up and turn toward the door.
Zack didn’t try to stop him. He just had a glare ready for Mark when he turned around with an evil grin on his face. Coming back slowly, he let Zack pull him into bed. Zack tried to undress him quickly, but when he tugged at his zipper, nothing happened. It was one of those toothy, metal zippers that had given Zack trouble on other occasions.
"Is your zipper stuck? Because I will rip these off you," he vowed to Mark as he tugged at his jeans now like he meant to carry out that threat.
Mark pushed him back and unzipped himself.
"It's not stuck. You are just clumsy," he told Zack. He kicked the jeans off and to the floor then climbed to straddle Zack.
"I know my way around a zipper. I've handled more zippers than you have doorknobs," Zack boasted.
Mark grimaced then said, "What?"
"OK. Not that many. And I've always been safe," he assured Mark who was still making a face at him.
"Did you just brag about being a slut?" Mark asked not wanting to let Zack off the hook.
"Men are experienced. Girls are sluts. Everyone knows that."
"Yeah. In the 1950's."
"Mark, look around this room. Being a feminist will get you nothing right now," Zack pointed out.
"You know, you make it really hard to maintain a sexy mood," Mark said.
"I know a surefire way to shut me up and restore the mood." Zack stared pointedly at the bulge in Mark's boxers.
"Fine," Mark said with a too realistic sigh. He lay back, not even bothering to undress himself the rest of the way. He laced his
fingers together and put his hands under his head. Then he just waited.
"Unbelievable," Zack said as he climbed over to him.
First he felt Mark through his boxers. He could tell that Mark was fighting the urge to push up into his hand.
"You want to come in them?" Zack asked. The idea was kind of a turn on for him, but Mark shook his head. Zack still kept rubbing him through the thin fabric, listening to Mark's breathing speed up. Zack lowered the waistband and let Mark's erection pop free before he started pulling the boxers the rest of the way off. With a slight delay, Mark raised his hips lazily, only enough to let the boxers slide over his ass.
Zack savored Mark’s cock as he let it slide into his mouth. Mark groaned and rubbed his shoulders then dug his fingers in as Zack pulled back, flicking the underside with his tongue. He licked the head playfully listening to all the low noises Mark was trying to suppress. Taking it slow, Zack drove him crazy and had him nearly thrashing on the bed. He drove himself crazy too in the process. But when he put his hand on his own cock, Mark warned him, "I want that." Mark came while clutching Zack’s head. But then he leapt on Zack and sucked on the head of his cock lovingly. He licked the shaft then the balls, but didn’t let Zack wait too long before sucking him down. Soon Zack said Mark’s name and burst in his mouth.
They were quiet for a while. Zack felt the rise and fall of Mark’s chest as he rested against him. But their stirring cocks didn’t let them lie still for long. Mark pushed Zack on his back and kissed his way down his body. His warm, wet tongue snaked over Zack’s dick guiding it to erection. Their kissing went from slow to urgent and deep. Their bodies came alive and hardened as they wrestled to touch each other everywhere.
Lying in the messy bed, Zack felt happier than he thought he could be. He was light enough to float to the ceiling, and so full of strength he could lift a house. He had the urge to go and wake up Al and tell him the good news. Instead he talked to Mark who was blinking slowly, ready to fall asleep.
"You’ve made everything better, the good and the bad. You fill my heart," Zack said in a whisper. "You know, when I looked at all those other men and felt so little, I thought maybe there wasn’t any room left because my heart is full of Al. But I guess a heart rebuilds itself with love."
"Am I supposed to say something sappy now?" Mark asked.
"No. I think I was sappy enough for both of us," Zack admitted.
"You were," Mark confirmed and then kissed him. He stayed with his arms wrapped around Zack and whispered to him, "You and Al rebuilt my heart too. I think it’s almost whole again."
"Well, we love you. I love you," Zack confessed.
"I know," Mark said casually.
"No. You’re supposed to melt."
Mark shrugged.
"At least say it back to me," Zack demanded.
"Maybe later," Mark said with a smirk.
"What the hell did I get myself into?" Zack asked in dismay.
"Don’t whine. Fine. I guess I love you too," Mark said with a roll of his pretty eyes.
Zack grabbed a hold of him and looked into those eyes. Mark smile went right through Zack’s heart.
"I love your smile even if you are mean," Zack said. He could see Mark swallow. His eyes softened and pulled Zack in. There it was, Mark was melting in his arms. They kissed softly, lazily, like two men who had all the time in the world to enjoy each other.
Chapter 38
Mark felt a tingle run down his spine when he saw he had a call from Zack. He took a breath as he thought about the sound of his voice.
"Come have lunch with me," Zack said as Mark answered the phone.
"Lunch?" Mark had been hoping for lunch in and sex on the kitchen floor.
"Come on. I’m hungry, and I miss you. You put those two things together, and we have lunch."
Mark agreed though he would have rather Zack dropped in at home for a little bite and a lot of sex. But doing other stuff with Zack was nice too. Plus everything they did seemed like foreplay. Mark found that he still had that tingly feeling now because he would see Zack not just hear him.
Zack wore his happy to see you look in his eyes as he kissed Mark in front of the nice restaurant. It was their first public kiss. They held hands as they walked in. It was all so new to Mark. But this was what it was like to have a boyfriend. And what a boyfriend. Mark was proud to be with him, and since they were in a gay friendly area, they didn’t have to hide. As they were eating, they were both aware that this was the first time they had gone out alone together. Mark wondered if that was what Zack had in mind.
Seeing Mark sitting across from him, looking so gorgeous, Zack couldn’t believe his luck. Mark had fought so hard to be with him and been so patient when he could have had anyone. Zack was determined to make him happy, though he suspected that it would be the other way around. Or maybe all their happiness would be multiplied together with Al’s. Now instead of dreading it, Zack looked forward to telling Al that Mark was in their lives to stay.
"Was this a date?" Mark asked him as they left the restaurant with their arms around each other.
"If you want it to be," Zack said with fake nonchalance.
"It's up to me?"
"I've been waiting for you to make the first move," Zack said.
Mark was instantly furious.
"I did make the first move at the beach house and at great personal risk," Mark reminded him.
"Don't say you were jeopardizing your position."
"There was the possibility of total humiliation as well as immediate firing. And I liked living with you and Al. I was scared to risk that. It was like having a family."
Zack kissed him.
"It’s a date then," he said to Mark.
"That's it? Come on. I've been waiting forever," Mark complained.
"You want more tongue?"
"At least drag me into the bushes. And yes, I want more tongue."
Actually all the bushes along that street were small enough to step over. It was a pleasant street with a lot of small shops and restaurants on either side. The sidewalk was lined with saplings and parked cars. It was a nice area to stroll through though many people hurried by.
Zack explained to Mark why he wasn’t getting any serious action.
"It’s a first date. You get a kiss on the doorstep. Tongue is optional. Then I promise to call you. Then a couple of days later, maybe I do."
"No wonder you’ve been single all this time," Mark told him.
"If I’d known someone like you was out there, I would have put more effort into dating. You are like someone I dreamed up." Seeing how Mark looked at him, Zack warned him, "Don’t say I’m being embarrassing."
Mark smiled.
"Actually, I felt the same way when I met you. Like I had given up because I didn’t know someone like you existed."
"You’re too young to give up," Zack admonished him.
"You meet guys, and they’re OK, and you have some fun. But then it seems like that’s all there is. And then there’s a guy standing in front of you, and he reaches inside you and grabs your heart and won’t give it back."
Zack just stared at Mark. It seemed impossible that he did that, but that was definitely what Mark had done to him. They stood very close together on a street corner and nuzzled each other. With every second he spent with Mark, the feeling of being together was settling over him, becoming real.
The only thing left to make their relationship official was to tell Al. Zack was nervous and excited as he waited for Mark in the evening. They hadn’t planned how they would announce their relationship to Al, But Zack definitely wanted Mark to be there, mostly as backup. He had never had to do this before. Even though Al was guaranteed to love the idea, it was still a little bit scary. It was no wonder. Al was still the most important person in Zack’s life.
Mark arrived and gave Zack an "Are you ready?" look. Before speaking with Al, Zack sat with Mark on the couch. It was a delaying tactic, but it also helped steady him. Now that the
decision was made, Mark was surprisingly uninterested in the process of delivering the news to Al.
"I’m sure you’ll do fine," Mark told him without even a trace of concern.
Zack put his arm around Mark's shoulder and pulled him closer hoping some of that serenity would rub off on him.
Al walked in on them like that. A puzzled look only briefly flashed on his face. Almost immediately, he walked up to them and tried to climb between them wiggling to make a space for himself when there wasn't enough room.
"Comfy?" Zack asked him after he wedged himself between them.
"Aha," Al said.
Zack leaned over to whisper into Mark's ear, "My son is cock-blocking me."
Al looked at Zack suspiciously.
"No telling secrets. No whispering," Al said
Now Zack reached his hand over to play with Mark’s hair. Noticing what Zack was up to, Al pushed him a little further from Mark so he would behave. Zack tried that maneuver again, and Al caught him.
"You keep your hands to yourself, mister," Al told him.
Smiling, Zack looked at Al. He wondered if he was starting to understand the real relationship between him and Mark.
After Al got bored and left them alone, Zack told Mark, "OK. I’m doing it now."
"What’s the rush? I was thinking we could just wait until we send out the wedding invitations and let him find out that way," Mark said and gave him a look to remind him how long he had to wait for this. Then he got a phone call and walked away to talk in the kitchen like Zack wasn’t about to share this momentous news of their relationship with his only child. Zack glared after him then called Al back.
Al put on a look of exaggerated patience as he walked over. When Zack asked him to sit with him, he seated himself and let out a long sigh.
"You have it rough, huh?" Zack said to him.
"Yeah," Al agreed wholeheartedly and let out another big sigh.
"Well, I have some good news. Mark and I love each other," Zack told him while watching his face carefully.
"Aha." That's all Al said like what Zack was telling him, not only wasn’t momentous, but wasn't newsworthy at all.
"Are you happy for us?" Zack prompted him
"Sure," Al said, still unimpressed by this big news. In fact he looked like he was waiting for Zack to say something worthy of calling him over and making him sit down.