My Forever

by J. L. Perry

  Logan grabs my hand. “Let me.” I still have my plaster on my arm so picking her up is a bit tricky. I step back. He kisses her little face and smiles at her. “How’s daddy’s little girl?” It warms my heart to see how much he loves her. She grabs a handful of his hair and pulls it. I can’t stop the giggle that comes out of my mouth.

  “Do you think that is funny?” he asks as he smiles, then passes her to me. I just shrug and smile. He gently kisses my check. “It’s good to hear you laugh again, baby,” he says. “Even if it is at my expense.”

  Logan watches me as I change Angel, then wrap her in a blanket. I pick her back up and kiss her sweet little cheeks. Logan puts his arm around me, and we make our way downstairs to have breakfast.

  When we walk into the kitchen, Jill looks at us. She just stares for a few seconds before giving us a big smile. This is the first time she’s seen us together since I’ve been home from the hospital. From the smile on her face and the tears in her eyes, I can tell that she is happy for us.

  Logan takes Angel while I make her a bottle. Jill asks us if we are ready for breakfast, as she walks over towards Logan and plants a soft kiss on Angel’s cheek. While Angel’s bottle is heating up, I walk over to Jill and wrap my arms around her.

  She is part of our family, just like Chris was. I want her to know how much she means to us. I think she is surprised by my hug, but she doesn’t hesitate to put her arms around me.

  “We love you, Jill,” I say as I kiss her cheek. I hear her sniffle. It is just something I feel I need to say. The accident has made me realise how uncertain life can be. I am glad that, the day of the accident, I got the chance to tell Chris how much he meant to us.

  When I step away from her, I notice she wipes a tear from her eye. “I love you all, too,” she says with a smile, then turns to continue making our breakfast. I look over at Logan, who is standing in the doorway holding Angel. He is smiling.

  When Angel’s bottle is ready, I follow him over to the table. Logan offers to feed her, but I want to. While she is sucking away at her bottle, I look over at Logan. He is sitting opposite me, just watching me with a smile on his face.

  “What?” I ask.

  “Nothing,” he replies, shrugging. “I was just thinking how amazing you are.” I can feel my face blush. I don’t feel amazing, but it is nice to hear. I smile at him before looking back down at Angel. “What you just said to Jill was nice.”

  I just shrug. “That’s just how I feel and I wanted her to know.”

  He reaches over and gently rubs my arm. “Would you like some coffee while you wait for breakfast?”

  I nod. “That would be nice. Thanks.” My eyes are glued to his sexy arse as he walks into the kitchen. He is so beautiful, inside and out. I feel a little heavy in the heart, though, thinking about all I’ve put him through. He looks so happy right now and I don’t want to say anything that will jeopardise that. I know I have plenty of time to make it up to him.

  After breakfast, he asks me what I have planned for the day. I tell him I would like to go for a run this morning, then just spend the rest of the day with him and Angel. It is Sunday so it is back to work for both of us tomorrow. I am apprehensive, but also looking forward to going back to the studio. I am especially looking forward to seeing Michelle. I’ve missed her, and am hoping she isn’t too angry with me for shutting her out. I am just going to throw myself back into my old life, and hope I come out the other side as the old me.

  Logan decides to come to the park with me for my run. He isn’t going to run with me. He is going to push Angel around in her pram while he waits for me to finish. I am just going to do a small run this morning. It’s been a while since I’ve done any exercise, so I want to slowly ease back into it.

  I have an appointment in two days to get my plaster off, which I am looking forward to. My ribs are still tender, but they have healed a lot since the accident. I am still getting headaches, but the doctor explained that I will probably get them for a while. Considering the head injury I sustained in the accident, I’m lucky that headaches are the only side effect I am experiencing. It could have been a lot worse.

  After my run, Logan puts one arm around me while pushing the pram with the other, as we walk back to the penthouse. I rest my head on his shoulder as we walk. It is nice. Things feel normal and comfortable again, just like they used to be. We both still have a lot to get past, but I know that we can do it.

  Angel is asleep in the pram when we get home, so I tell Logan I am going to go upstairs and take a quick shower. I go to give him a quick kiss and he wraps his arms around me. “A shower sounds good,” he says, a wicked smile on his face.

  “Why don’t you join me then,” I reply with a wink.

  We ask Jill if she can keep an eye on Angel before Logan sweeps me into his arms and carries me to the bathroom. I wrap my arms around his neck as I rain tiny kisses across his jaw and down his neck.

  Once we reach the bathroom, Logan undresses us both in record time. While he is putting some plastic over my plaster, I reach down with my other hand and stroke him. When he closes his eyes and groans, I can’t help myself. I fall to my knees and take him into my mouth. I love pleasing him like this, and it has been too long.

  He throws his head back and groans again, his hands tangling in my hair. “Oh fuck, baby,” he growls. “I’ve missed your sweet mouth on my cock.” I can’t help the smile that comes over my face. I love the way he doesn’t hold back how he feels. Once upon a time, things like that would have offended me, but they never do with Logan. I like that we are so open with each other.

  Before I get to finish him off, he puts his hands under my arms and gently pulls me up to my feet. He crushes his mouth to mine and walks me backwards until my back hits the tiles on the wall. He lifts me up and I wrap my legs around his waist. His hand slides down between us to see if I am ready. I get turned on just as much as him by what I just did. I always do.

  He gently slips inside me. Usually he is a lot rougher, but I know he is still worried about my injuries. He brought it up a few times last night when we were making love. I moan into his mouth as he moves inside me. I am still a bit tender from all the sex we had last night, but the pleasure far outweighs the pain.

  “Fuck, I love you so much,” he says. “Please don’t ever shut me out again, baby.” I grab both sides of his face and deepen our kiss. Now is not the time for talking, but I know I will never shut him out again. I need him too much. Since reconnecting with him yesterday, I’ve realised how much stronger he makes me.

  “I promise,” is all I manage to say between our kisses.

  We both come together, but he doesn’t pull out of me straight away. Instead, he pulls his face away from mine and just looks at me, tenderly stroking my hair. I am more in love with him at that moment than I ever have been. After everything I’ve put him through, he still loves me more than anything. I am one lucky girl. I feel the tears rising to my eyes.

  “Don’t cry, baby,” he says, gently setting me back on my feet. He leans over and kisses both my eyes.

  I wrap my arms around his neck. “I love you so much,” I say, as I squeeze him tightly. “I’m so lucky to have you. Thank you for not giving up on me.”

  He pulls his head back again and looks into my eyes. “We are lucky to have each other,” he replies with a smile. “We were made for each other, Brooke. That’s why everything feels so perfect when we are together.” He gently kisses my lips again before leading me over to the shower.

  ****

  Logan

  As I let the warm water wash over us, every muscle in my body relaxes. I feel a deep inner peace, which I haven’t felt since before the accident. It is like everything is right in the world again.

  I pick up the body wash, and gently wash Brooke. It has been so long since I have done this, and I can’t help but smile as my hands glide over her beautiful skin. I grab the shampoo next, massaging her scalp as I wash her hair.

  “Mmmm,” she says,
leaning back into my chest.

  “Feel good, baby?” I ask and she nods.

  Once I have rinsed her off, she tells me it is her turn. She turns around and looks at me. I know I have a big stupid smile on my face.

  “What is that look for?” she asks.

  “I’m just really happy,” I reply.

  She puts her hand up and strokes the side of my face. “I am, too. I’m sorry for everything I have put you through. I promise I will never shut you out again. If something is upsetting me, you will be the first person I come to. Okay?”

  “That’s all I wanted to hear,” I say. “Now, are you going to wash me or not? I have missed your hands on me.” She slaps me on the arm and we both laugh. It feels good to be with her again.

  Once we are dried and dressed, we make our way back downstairs. Jill is sitting at the table, feeding Angel, and Brooke’s father is sitting opposite her. The way they are looking at each other shocks me. I look over at Brooke and she raises her eyebrows at me, a smile on her face.

  Maybe with everything that has been going on with us, we failed to realise that something was going on with them. If that is the case, I couldn’t be happier. They are both wonderful people and deserve to be happy.

  “Well…well…well,” Brooke says, and I have to laugh when they both jump. “Is there something you two need to tell us?” She makes her way over to kiss her father. I notice Jill put her head down and blush.

  Brooke’s dad stands up and clears his throat before he kisses her. “How are you feeling today, sweetheart?” he asks.

  “I’m good,” she replies. “Now, don’t change the subject.” He puts his head down and clears his throat again. Brooke and I both laugh this time. They are like two little kids who’d been caught doing something wrong. I can tell they are both uncomfortable.

  “Why don’t you take the rest of the day off, Jill,” I say. “Brooke and I are just going to hang out here today.” She looks up at me and then over at Brooke’s father.

  “Are you sure?” she asks with a shy smile.

  “Of course we are,” Brooke adds. “Why don’t you take Jill out for a nice lunch or something, Dad?” she says with a wink.

  Her dad smiles “You don’t mind, do you?” he asks, looking over at me.

  “Please,” I say, smiling. “Nothing would make me happier.”

  “Okay.” He looks at Jill. “Would you like to have lunch with me?” he asks.

  “I would love to,” she replies shyly.

  “Oh, the two of you are too cute,” Brooke says. “Off you go then.” Brooke is smiling as she makes a “shoo” gesture with her hand. I think she is happy about this, too. I can’t think of any reason why these two shouldn’t find happiness together. She kisses her father goodbye, whispering something in his ear that makes him smile.

  “I love you, sweetheart,” he says.

  “I love you, too, Dad,” she replies, wrapping her arms around him.

  Jill jumps up, saying that she just needs to grab her handbag. I take Angel from her, and the smile on her face lights up the room. I walk over to my uncle and gently punch him in arm. “You old dog, you,” I say with a smile. “I’m happy for you both. You are perfect for each other.”

  Once they have both left, I ask Brooke, “What did you whisper in your dad’s ear?”

  “I told him I wanted him to find his happily ever after. It was something he said to me on the morning of our wedding. I know how much he loved my mum and how many regrets he still has that it never worked out for them. I just want him to find some happiness. After living with your nasty aunt for all those years, he deserves it. So does Jill.”

  “I couldn’t have said it better myself, baby,” I reply as I kiss her lips.

  “Now we have the whole house to ourselves. What do you want to do?” I ask.

  “I don’t care,” she says. “As long as we’re together, I’ll be happy.”

  CHAPTER FO

  URTEEN

  Brooke

  Over the next few weeks, everything falls into place. I love being back at the studio and everybody seems happy to have me back. Logan and I have gone back to the way it was before the accident, and Michelle and I are still as close as ever. The end-of-year concert is scheduled to take place in a few weeks and everyone is excited.

  I have finally been able to talk to Logan about the accident. We both decide to seek some professional help. I’m not 100% sure that I need it, but I want to put all those ghosts that haunt me to rest. Logan says it is the only way to make sure all the dramas of our past are truly behind us.

  During one therapy session, we discuss Chris’ mother. This has been one of my main worries since finding out about his death. Logan tells me that he’s been visiting her, which makes me smile. I should have known. Apparently, he’s been visiting her at least once a week since the accident, and his parents see her sometimes, as well.

  I ask the psychologist if she thinks it is a good idea if I go to visit her. Part of me wants to, but the other part of me is scared that it will cause too much heartache. She advises me that facing my fears is the first part of truly healing myself.

  Logan comes with me for the first visit with Chris’ mother. She is such a sweet old thing, and I am so glad that I have agreed to go. Logan and I talk about going on separate days in the future. Between us and his parents, that would mean she would be getting at least three visits a week. I am going to bring Angel with me the next time I go. Logan told me how she’d always pestered Chris to give her grandchildren. So if bringing Angel makes her happy, then that is what I am going to do. I feel like I owe it to Chris. His mother was his biggest worry when he was alive. If we can give her any kind of happiness, then we will.

  During the therapy sessions, we also discuss my mother’s death, my father, and Jake. Logan thought that with everything I’ve been through, it was best to discuss it all. I really thought I was okay with all that other stuff, but he is right. Talking about everything helps put it into perspective. Logan says it helped him, as well. The night that Jake killed himself, as well as everything else that happened, has been playing on his mind.

  I am sad to hear that he was bottling all that up, and I wish he would have opened up to me. Logan says that he never discussed it with me because he didn’t want to upset me. Always the protector. On the way home that night, I remind him that we are a team, which is something he is always saying to me. I don’t want him keeping his feelings to himself to protect me. He has supported me through so much and I want to do the same for him.

  The night of the end-of-year concert is finally here. The few days leading up to it were stressful, but it goes off without a hitch. We have a few of my piano students do solos in between costume changes, as well.

  Michelle and Logan have also organised for Jacinta to fly in from Melbourne to surprise me. She performs the solo dance we worked on before she moved. She has come so far from the scared little girl I used to know. I am so proud of her. Just seeing her smile warms my heart. I am so happy that things have worked out for her and her mother.

  After the traumatic life she has had, she deserves to be happy and live a normal life. They stayed with us for a few days after the concert before flying back to Melbourne. It was nice to catch up with them both.

  Life seems like it is finally getting back to the way it used to be. I still have my little moments here and there, but I am definitely moving forward.

  Angel is growing fast. She is such a happy little baby. She’s definitely daddy’s little girl, though. I love watching them together. Seeing how much love he has for our daughter just makes me love him so much more.

  Things are good. We are finally the happy little family we’d imagined we would be before the accident.

  ****

  Our second Christmas together came and went. Things for us are still going great. Angel is eating solids, sitting up, and trying to crawl. She is also starting to talk. Only mum and dada, as well as a few other words, but they are the most pre
cious words a parent can ever hear. She is such a happy little thing.

  Logan’s birthday is in a few weeks, and I want to do something special for him. He is a hard person to buy for, though, because he wants for nothing. I am going to talk with Michelle to see if she can help me come up with something special for him.

  My birthday had come and gone while I’d been suffering with depression. Even after everything I had put him through, Logan still tried to make it special. He organised a cake, and got Jill to cook my favourite food. When I’d gone down for dinner, he was sitting at the table, Angel in his arms. He’d bought me flowers, perfume, and jewellery.

  After dinner, he’d even sung happy birthday to me. I just sat there, not saying a word. I didn’t even say thank you. He smiled the whole time, but by the end of the night, I could see it was forced. I really had been pretty rotten to him during that time in our life. All was forgiven in Logan’s mind, but I still beat myself up about it occasionally.

  ****

  Michelle and I have shopped and looked online to find him the perfect present, but we can’t find anything special enough. She has offered to take Angel for the weekend so we can go on a romantic weekend away, which is a good start. I know he will enjoy that, but I really want something more.

  I’m not ready to give up just yet, so I ask my father and Jill to watch Angel for the day. Michelle and I are going to meet for breakfast, then hit the shops again.

  We meet at a local café after my morning run. I am feeling a bit off today, and I hope I’m not coming down with something. We talk and laugh as we wait for our breakfast to arrive. I order some banana bread because I’m not feeling the best, and Michelle orders bacon and eggs.

  When the waitress places our food in front of us, one smell of the bacon has me running to the bathroom. After empting the contents in my stomach, I wash my face and go back to the table.

  “Are you okay?” she asks when I sit back down.

  I shrug. “I’m just not feeling well.”