Explosive Memories

by Sherri Thomas

  “I’ve held a lot back and hurt you in the process,” Trent said in a rough voice, one full of emotion. One she’d never heard before.

  He raised her face and stared into her eyes. “But that wasn’t my intention. I figured the past was better forgotten.”

  Jordan waited, wanting to hear more, wanting him to tell her, but he volunteered nothing further. God, she wanted to hit him. “After everything I’ve told you and all we shared, why can’t you open up to me?”

  He stood staring at her until she fought the urge to scream.

  “Forget it. If you can’t tell me even now, this is just over.” She shoved his hat at him and pushed past. Going to the back of the vehicle, she found a small jack, a tire iron, and a half-decent spare under the bed.

  “Let me.” Trent tugged the jack from her hand and set to work on the tire.

  Jordan shook her head. “I can do it.”

  “Please. We need to talk, and the sooner we get this done, the sooner we can straighten things out.”

  She whipped her head his way. “And are you going to talk, Trent? Are you going to trust me enough, as I’ve trusted you? Or do you think sex will make up for everything?” She was aware her voice rose and was thankful no one else was around.

  He stood and slid her hair back behind her ear, sending a jolt through her body. She held herself ramrod straight, refusing to give him the satisfaction of knowing how he affected her.

  “I’ll tell you anything you want to know.”

  Not quite believing him, she raised one eyebrow.

  “I swear.”

  Seeing nothing but honesty in his open arm stance, she nodded. “I’m telling you, Trent Matthews, if you hand me a line of bullshit, I’m leaving…for good.”

  “Duly noted, ma’am.” He placed his Stetson on her head and set about changing the flat. “Looks like you ran over some type of metal.” He pulled the object out of the sidewall of the rubber. “Must have been sticking out of the road. Certainly is an odd angle to get wedged into.”

  Jordan inspected the piece he handed her. A metal nail file? How on earth had that happened?

  “Maybe it was in there a while, and hitting that divot punctured the tire further.” He tightened the bolts and put everything away. “That should do it.” Opening the driver door, he gestured for her to get in.

  Sliding past him, making sure not to touch in any way, she sat behind the wheel and stared ahead. “Thank you.”

  “My pleasure, ma’am.”

  She heard the smile in his voice and glanced up at his face. A calloused finger stroked the side of her cheek, and she had to steal herself against the desire to close her eyes.

  “Follow me?” he asked.

  Knowing she’d never forgive herself if she drove away without answers, she simply nodded and watched him climb into his truck.

  The smell of him lingered in the cab of her vehicle. His Stetson on her head left her dizzy with what it implied. She knew most cowboys didn’t give up their hat easily. So what did it mean? For most, it signified she was his, but for others, the act meant nothing. Right now, she could not be his, and the self-inflicted pain made it difficult for her to breathe. She switched on the radio to drown out the nagging voice in her head.

  Dusk fell quickly as she kept up with his taillights, cursing herself for being every sort of fool. His turn signal flashed, and she followed suit, but halfway down the dirt drive, recognition shocked her. This was the way to the shack.

  The place contained too many memories for her to remain objective, yet she wanted his explanation, needed to hear the words come out of his mouth.

  At the end of the path, she parked beside him and debated what to do. Staring out the windshield, she caught a glimpse of a shadow moving toward the trees, but the only thing in sight were a couple of squirrels.

  Her driver side door opened.

  “You gettin’ out?” A note of edginess lined Trent’s tone.

  His nervousness gave her momentary pause and a sliver of confidence.

  “Yes.” Shutting off the engine, she stepped from the vehicle and followed him inside their shack.

  “Hopefully, the lantern still works. I’d even settle for a few candles. It’s gonna be pitch black out here soon.” He rummaged through the two cupboards and produced both. Setting the lamp on the table, he switched the knob, but nothing happened. He flipped the object over and tinkered with the battery.

  “If you give me the candles, I’ll light them while you mess with that thing.” She placed his hat on a peg on the wall and extended her hand.

  “There should be matches in the drawer.”

  Not giving into the strong urge to glance his way, she found the matches and lit the wax.

  “The terminals are corroded.” Trent pulled out his pocket knife, scraped the remnants off the battery, and reassembled the pieces before he flicked the knob. Light sputtered, then illuminated the room. “You can blow out the candles. We’ll keep ’em close by in case the lantern doesn’t last.”

  Jordan glanced around. The cabin appeared clear of debris and cobwebs. A total contradiction to their last visit. Maybe that’s why he brought her? To show her and remind her of the time they spent together? “You cleaned the place up.”

  He shook his head. “Wasn’t me, but someone obviously has.”

  “Maybe Darcy and Nick snuck away to be alone.”

  “Don’t see why when they have their own place.” Tension radiated off him, and she wondered what his stress was all about.

  Not really caring who tidied up the space, she shrugged and doused the wax sticks.

  He grasped her hand and motioned for her to sit on the cot, then lowered himself next to her.

  His lips brushed hers and half of her melted. The other half rose in defense. “Huh-uh.” She extracted herself from his arms and scurried to the end of the bed. “You promised we’d talk.”

  “We will.”

  “Now.”

  He blew out a breath and scooted over until the wall supported his back. Raising one knee, he rested his forearm across the bone. “What I said back at the house had nothing to do with you—”

  “Sounded like it had everything to do with me.”

  “Do you wanna listen or argue?”

  His tone remained light, yet she sensed his uneasiness, and instead of answering, zipped her lips, for now.

  “I care about you a lot more than I’ve ever cared for a woman…but I’m nowhere near ready to marry.”

  Hurt blazed in her eyes, and Trent felt the pain of disappointing her all the way to his soul. He rushed on to explain. “I’m not saying this very well.” Needing contact, he intertwined his fingers with hers. “All through high school, I dated this girl, April. We had an on again off again relationship. My buddies and some of the girls at school warned me she was crazy. I figured they meant as in wild, havin’ a good time type crazy, but as time went by, I realized she wasn’t stable, mentally. Anyway, we broke up a few times over the course of two years and—”

  “Were you dating her the night you and I—”

  “No. That was one of the broken up times. But she figured I was hers forever. She approached me, claiming she loved me and how I hurt her by being with another girl. She knew you and I spent the night together, ’bout the skinny dipping and everything. She made me feel guilty. She was upset, but different, like she really missed me, and we started dating again. She promised to take her medications and see a psychiatrist. Everything appeared better.” Resting his head on the wall, he wondered how to explain why he asked April to marry him. His reasoning sounded lame, laughable even as he compared his feelings for Jordan to what he experienced back then.

  “I didn’t love her. I know that now, but I felt responsible for her, like I pushed her too hard and maybe made her be the way she was. It seemed like the right thing to do at the time, what was expected.” He peered into those blue, blue eyes, holding her gaze, hoping against the odds she’d understand. “So I proposed. A couple
of weeks later, her apartment complex burned to the ground. She had nowhere to go, and we planned on getting married anyway, so I asked her to move in with me. One thing led to another, and we fought all the time. Mind you, this went on over a period of almost four years. She complained to everyone who’d listen how I neglected her and spent too much time dealing with the ranch, but the final straw came about two years ago, when I agreed to go out of town to pick up a bull for my brother. When I arrived home, all hell broke loose.”

  Not sure what she thought, he fidgeted, and played with her fingers. “She accused me of going to see ‘Jordan.’” He examined her features, gauging a reaction. “I told her I didn’t know who this Jordan was, but she called me a liar, pulled out a pistol, and shot me, twice.”

  The full realization of April knowing Lynn’s real name hit him like a ton of bricks. Somehow, the witch discovered the information that would’ve changed his life. An eerie feeling crept down his spine. April had been more deceitful than he gave her credit for.

  “Oh, my, God. That’s why the scars and the surgery?” She wrapped her arms around him in a fierce embrace. “She shot you because of me.”

  He grasped her upper arms and pulled back. Tears shimmered in her eyes. “Do you understand? I knew her for years, yet she was more of a stranger to me than you were that night.”

  Needing to feel her close, he snuggled into her hair, inhaling the intoxicating vanilla scent when something whacked his arm, and she withdrew.

  “Ouch. What was that for?” He rubbed the spot.

  “Don’t you ever compare me to that monster.” Small hands shoved at his chest.

  “No, darlin’, that’s what I’m trying to tell you. When April got upset and angry, I turned away.” Trent took a hold of her fingers and brought them to his lips. “When I see pain in your eyes, or when I think you’re upset or crying, I want to hold you. I want to make you better. You aren’t anything like her, and my feelings for you are far stronger, but it’s me.” Perspiration beaded on his back. He had to make her understand. The thought of losing her bore too much heartache. “I need to take things slow.”

  “Same bottom line if you ask me.”

  He cupped her chin. “Nowhere close.” Lowering his head, he grazed her lips once, twice, before crushing her to him. She tasted like coffee and sunshine, and he wanted more. He wanted whatever she was willing to give.

  She wrenched away. “Did you hear that?”

  “What?” Nothing penetrated over the pounding of his heart. He held on, afraid she’d walk out if he let go.

  “Listen. There it is again.”

  Something smacked the side of the cabin, then the door flew open to reveal the one redhead Trent had prayed he’d never see again.

  Chapter Thirteen

  “Well, well, well, isn’t this cozy.”

  “April, what are you doing here?” Staring at the end of a pistol, Trent shuffled toward the edge of the bed, careful to keep Jordan behind him as the door slammed shut.

  “Don’t move, you two-timing dirt bag,” she yelled. “I came back to be with you, and you’re with her again. How could you do this to me?” A wave of anxiety entered her voice as she eyed Jordan with distain. “And you, why couldn’t you have died like you were supposed to. Damn you, Trent, always coming to her rescue.”

  Jordan inched closer to his side.

  Rage filled him. Was she admitting to trying to kill Jordan? He forced himself to be calm and speak in a level tone. “What do you mean, she was supposed to die?”

  “In the fire, damn you. Or today. She could’ve at least had the decency to land in the hospital after her tire blew out. Damn it, why do you always go back to her?”

  Catching a glimpse of the cell phone in Jordan’s hand, he decided to keep the crazed woman talking. “You’re the reason she got a flat?”

  “So smart cowboy.” She stepped closer. “But if she would’ve died in the fire, none of this would’ve happened.” Her eyes narrowed in Jordan’s direction. I will never forgive you for seducing my fiancé.”

  “What fire?” Trent stood to keep April from the bed.

  “And here I called you smart. The night of Charlie’s bonfire, when she refused to leave with her slut friend, who by the way will give you any information you want if you get her drunk enough.” April laughed. “I discovered little miss tramp’s real name, and where she lived…” She shook her head. “I tried giving you a chance to explain, but I couldn’t find you after your skinny dipping episode. So, I decided to pay your girlfriend a visit myself and set her damn house on fire. Only later, when I came back, she was still sleeping right here with you!”

  Jordan gasped, and the sound ripped him apart. He couldn’t imagine the pain the sudden confession must be causing her, but he couldn’t soothe her right now. Not if he wanted to save her.

  “There’s something about those flames, the way they light up the night and burn everything in their path. I love watching the destruction. It’s like wiping the world clean of sin.” Her face light up with a crazy happiness as the corner of her mouth twitched. “I may have failed the first time, but I don’t give up. I’m no quitter. I spent too much time planning everything to have this whore ruin it all,” she hollered, waving the gun in front of her. An evil smirk encased her lips. “Burning down my apartment building got you to let me move in, and I made sure I did everything right to get you to propose.” She stood taller, pushing her breasts out as if she were proud of her accomplishments, then anger flashed in her eyes, transforming her features to reflect cold, malicious fury. “If you could’ve just stayed away from this tramp.” The pistol dipped, then rose.

  He trekked closer.

  “Stay right there.” Shadows danced around the room in the lamp light as the gun wavered in her hand.

  April was more of a loose cannon than he’d ever imagined. He had to get Jordan out of here.

  “For a while, I thought it’d work out.” April snarled. “Then you started talking about black hair and blue eyes in your sleep.”

  Behind him, Jordan jerked up. If he wasn’t clear on how much she meant to him, surely this would convince her.

  “I wanted to choke you with my own hands. I’d lie awake at night listening to you sing her praises—do you know how sickening that was? And when you deserted me to pick up your precious bull, I knew you were going to see her. That’s when I decided if I couldn’t have you, no one could.”

  A vacant look came over her face as she stared straight at him, and he wondered if she’d shoot him in this very spot without any warning. He braced himself, waiting, praying he’d get the chance to tell Jordan how much she meant to him.

  April’s shoulders slumped a bit, and she sniffed. “I didn’t want to shoot you, honey, but you gave me no choice.”

  “It’s okay…sweetheart.” He swallowed the bile in his throat at the endearment, but figured their only hope was to play along, and hoped like hell Jordan knew what he was doing. “I forgive you. I understand, and it’s not too late. We can be together now.” He gentled his voice to distract the delusional woman and keep her attention on him. “You and me. We can go anywhere you want. I know how much you hated the ranch. We can have a fresh start somewhere else.”

  April stared, her eyes softening. “Really? You’d leave your family for me?” A frown grew as her features took on a hard edge. “No. You’re lying. I’ve been watching you with her. What is she doing?” She moved forward and motioned for Trent to move aside. “Get out of my way.”

  He held his ground. No way was he letting her close to Jordan.

  She pointed the pistol at the center of his chest. “I said move, cowboy.”

  “No. Don’t.” His black-haired beauty skirted around his back and held out her phone. “Here.”

  “Aww. How sweet of you to protect your lover, but really stupid of you to attempt calling for help.” She snatched the device out of her hand and waved the barrel of the gun. “I should shoot you right here.”

  Trent
sidestepped to block her path, prepared to feel the blow pierce his skin, again, but the pain never surfaced.

  April stomped her foot. “To this day you’re protecting her. Does she mean that much to you that you’d give up your own life?” Her voice rose with hysteria. “Why? Why couldn’t you love me that much? I gave you everything. Everything.” Tears ran down her cheeks as she walked backward toward the door, opened the wood, and threw the phone out into the black night. “If you can’t love me in this life, maybe you’ll love me in another.”

  His mind went crazy trying to figure a way out of this. “Can’t you forgive me? I’ll spend the rest of my life making this up to you.” He tried one more time to convince her of his intentions. “What can I do for you to believe me?”

  “Tie her up.”

  Trent glanced to Jordan’s confused, pale face and back to the evil witch standing way too close. There had to be a way out of this. “What?”

  “You heard me.”

  “Why?”

  “Then we can go outside and watch this place burn…with her inside. The flames are even more impressive in the dark.” Confident laughter filled the cabin and sent a cold streak down his spine. Not lowering the gun, she reached her other hand to the waistband of her jeans and tossed him a couple of small ropes she’d had tucked there.

  Two pieces of twine smacked him in the torso and fell to the ground. “Can’t we just leave her here?”

  “No.” Anger filled her features. “Tie her up…or I’ll shoot you both.” She pointed the pistol at him, then Jordan.

  Fear for the woman he loved forced him to pick up the line, hoping like hell he’d be able to protect her from the raving lunatic. Turning, he moved in slow motion, trying to stall. Needing to find a way to reassure her he’d get them out of this, his eyes met hers, and the fear in her features ripped his heart in two.

  “And no funny business. I will check the knots.”

  “I’ll get you out of this baby,” he whispered to Jordan, leaning into her, pretending to wrap the rope around her wrists. “Grab the knife in my front pocket and be ready. When I say go, run out that door.” As his lips brushed her warm, smooth cheek, he felt her grasp the switchblade.