The Forest at the Edge of the World

by Mercer, Trish

  “Honestly, is there really that big of a Guarder threat? After all these years? Especially here in Edge? It just seems so . . . so convenient sometimes.”

  All the light dimmed from his eyes.

  “Guarders. You’re asking me about Guarders.”

  “Yes, Guarders,” she repeated, not understanding his reticence. “I’ve lived here all my life and have heard of only two people who supposedly ever saw Guarders, and one of the witnesses had been drinking old grape juice. Guarder activity hasn’t been close to Edge since Querul the First’s soldiers chased them to the forest. Perhaps they’re still there, but they never come into the village. I’ve even walked along the forest edge to see the bubbling mud and have never seen anyone!”

  “You also didn’t notice when one hundred men plus twenty-five complement, a dozen full wagons, and twenty-five horses moved in less than a quarter mile away from your home,” Perrin countered.

  Mahrree paused. “You make a good argument,” she murmured. Mahrree was never one to look too far beyond her books. She was a woman of the word, not of the world.

  “Still,” she continued, “doesn’t one hundred soldiers, or rather, one hundred-twenty-five seem excessive?”

  The previous brightness in his eyes still didn’t returned. “If you knew what I knew . . . but I can’t tell you all of it.” He sat up straight and looked like a soldier at attention.

  Mahrree assumed it was an instinctive stance.

  “The Administrators, when they came to power, initially attempted to send out scouts to look for new lands to settle.” Perrin’s voice was careful and calculated. “They were headed to the ruins King Querul’s soldiers had visited many years ago, hoping to discover if the area was still poisoned—”

  Mahrree sat up eagerly at the mention of Terryp’s ruins, but had the wisdom to not interrupt.

  “—Their findings were most disappointing. They never reached the ruins. All of the forests surrounding the world on the north and west show evidence of increased Guarder activity. One of their spies was apprehended and brought to the High General for questioning. There’s no doubt: they are moving closer to the smaller villages. We have every reason to believe they’re planning to raid places even like Edge, thus we’ve implemented a presence to discourage such activity.”

  Mahrree sat at attention, trying not to show her disappointment that the scouts never reached Terryp’s land, or that he provided an army-issued explanation that sounded rather rehearsed.

  In her most official voice she said, “I thank you for your report, Captain.”

  Perrin’s lips parted in surprise but he quickly closed them.

  “Uh, old soldier’s habit, to make reports. Sorry.”

  “And how old a soldier are you?” Mahrree prodded with a smile, even though she already knew from that one interesting fact in the back of the history book.

  “As old as you,” he smiled back.

  Mahrree wondered how he knew her age.

  He leaned back in his chair and studied her, resting his head on his fingers.

  But Mahrree didn’t notice. She had to try one more time now that the official report was out of the way.

  “Do you really think these mysterious peoples of violent tendencies, whom we’ve heard very little from for one hundred nineteen years, are suddenly coming to invade us here in Edge?”

  His studied look vanished and he shrugged. “Sounds a little far-fetched when you put it that way, but yes, I suspect they may.”

  “‘Suspect’ and ‘may,’” Mahrree jumped on his hesitation. “Yes, you really are convinced. Is there not any other reason those men, I mean your men, are here?”

  He leaned forward. “For what other reason could there be?”

  “I really don’t know,” Mahrree admitted, suddenly feeling chilled, “but as you spoke even the air seemed to change. Didn't you feel it?”

  Perrin sighed. “Conflict always brings an odd feeling. Even preparing for a conflict that never comes changes the air around it. I don’t like it, Mahrree, but I like even less what a full battle would mean to this village. Or to you.”

  Mahrree swallowed. Something in the way he said her name, then said “you,” felt very intimate.

  Then she remembered something.

  “Ruins! You mentioned something about ruins, Captain. Will they be sending another scouting mission? Once the Guarder threat is put down again?”

  Perrin looked a little annoyed and Mahrree didn’t know why.

  “The ruins. That’s what you want to talk about now? The ruins.”

  “Oh, yes!” Mahrree exclaimed. “I’ve always been fascinated by those who lived here before we did. Just imagine—they’ve already gone through and completed The Test! Terryp had spent so much time—”

  “Terryp?” he interrupted her and squinted in surprise. “I remember you mentioned him at the fourth debate, but just how much do you know about Terryp?”

  Mahrree rolled her eyes. “The greatest historian of the Middle Age? The one who studied the great ruins beyond the deserts west of Sands? I think I know all there is to know about Terryp! More than just his stories, his discoveries! When I was a girl I used to fantasize about his expedition after the Great War. My father and I would hypothesize about what he discovered, what might have been on his map, and why Querul didn’t want that information known—”

  She stopped in worry, realizing she was saying too much in front of a man who swore to serve the king until the regime change just two years ago.

  The corner of Perrin’s mouth went up.

  “As a girl you fantasized about a historian who’s been dead for a hundred years?” He chuckled. “You’re just full of surprises, aren’t you?”

  Mahrree relaxed at his changed demeanor.

  “I found Terryp far more interesting than the stories of girls in distress awaiting rescue. Where’s the adventure in that? Sitting around in a tree hoping some dashing soldier would look up and see her cowering in fear from Guarders?” She scoffed. “But ruins—ah! Now there’s something worthwhile—”

  “Mahrree!” he said abruptly, then pressed his lips together.

  She stared at him, startled by his outburst. “What?”

  “Can we discuss ruins at another time?” He winced.

  “I suppose so, but what would we discuss instead?” She was mystified, and a bit put off.

  “I have been thinking about the debates—”

  “So have I!” Mahrree grinned. “I was thinking, when we have time maybe we can start them again. I have some new arguments for Mrs. Arky to counter Mr. Arky with about eating anywhere in the house. The number one reason has to do with ants. Oh, but I shouldn’t tell you that. Don’t want to give away—”

  “Mahrree!”

  The solemnity in his voice startled her. He looked at her with such intensity that he clearly wasn’t thinking about the Arkys.

  Or ants.

  “Just . . . let me say this, all right? No more interruptions?”

  By the way his jaw clenched, she decided she best just listen. She gave him a brief nod to continue.

  He took a deep breath.

  “I haven’t been able to get the debates out of my mind. Or you out of my mind.”

  Mahrree bit her lower lip.

  “I didn’t know what I would find in Edge, but I was really hoping to find . . .” He paused, stared at this hands, and shook his head.

  Mahrree was completely bewildered by his behavior. She really didn’t know men.

  “Honestly, Mahrree, it was only a little ways into that very first debate that I thought to myself, ‘I could, I could . . .’”

  He could what?!

  “Icouldloveawomanlikeyou,” he rushed. He slowly looked up into her face with something like anguish.

  Mahrree sat stunned as she ran the words, or rather word, over in her head to break apart the syllables. I think he said it, she mused. It was too much to hope for, but she hoped anyway. She smiled encouragingly.

  “So
you could, could you?”

  “Mahrree, what are you doing to me!?” He stood up abruptly, then sat back down again.

  She’d never seen him like this. The captain was nowhere to be found. Instead sat, stood, then sat yet again an agitated—and now almost pathetic—man.

  “I’m sorry, what am I doing?” she asked sweetly, but not innocently. She thought briefly that her teenage students would be proud of her composed reaction to this most unexpected conversation.

  He put his hands together and rested his elbows on knees. One leg began to bounce nervously.

  “I feel like I can no longer create a coherent sentence. Maybe we need an audience.” He stood again, walked around the chair, and used it as a buffer to stand behind. He put on a look of resolution and blurted, “Mahrree, I don’t want to get married—”

  Definitely unexpected.

  Her heart dropped through the floor.

  “—to a woman who cannot think or take a challenge. The only kind of woman I could ever marry—”

  Her heart lifted back up to just above her belly.

  “—is a thoughtful woman who can hold her own in a conflict. I need someone who believes just as strongly as I do.”

  Her heart hovered. He meant her, right? He was talking about marrying . . . and suggesting her . . . in the same sentences?

  How did they get here!?

  But another thought struck her and she knew what she had to say, but couldn’t believe she’d utter the words until she did.

  “But Perrin, I don’t think I believe the same as you,” she said miserably. “So many things we debated, we were on opposite sides, except for the fourth debate. Rector Densal gave you my position. Otherwise—”

  “No, no, no!” he cried and came around the chair to sit back down to face Mahrree. He leaned forward earnestly and was so close she could breathe in his earthy sweet scent.

  She struggled to concentrate.

  “Don’t you remember?” he pleaded. “I’ve told you twice now, your mind is closer to mine that you realize. We’re so alike! You defended every argument the way I would. I argued ideas, but not always my ideas. I’ve never believed the sky is only blue! In fact, the more I think about it, the more I’m convinced that it truly is black, and that the blue is an illusion. And that fourth debate, that’s when you finally heard how I really feel. I told Hogal I wanted that position so that I could try to prove to you that I do believe in The Writings. I agree with you on everything. Except dogs. Dogs are far better than cats.”

  Sometime during his speech Mahrree’s heart leaped to her throat making it very difficult for her to breathe. So she just hoped for what might come next. And hoped she wouldn’t lose consciousness waiting.

  Perrin gathered her small soft hands into his large rough ones.

  The effect caused Mahrree to lose all ability to speak, had she been able to breathe.

  “Mahrree, what I want to say is,” he began, staring at their hands together, “why I am here is . . .” He looked up into her face. “You can see the direction all of this is going, right?”

  Mahrree was sure she could, but she didn’t feel it was her place to make this any easier. She smiled and shook her head. Besides, her lungs still couldn’t function and everything was starting to go gray.

  He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and said, “Mahrree, may we continue our debates forever as husband and wife?” He peeked to gauge her response.

  At least, she thought he did. Her eyes were too full of astonished tears to see him clearly. She nodded vigorously.

  “Really?!” Perrin asked, immense relief in his voice. “You don’t want to have time to think about it?”

  She thought briefly. She didn’t want to think about it? Inexplicably, she felt no reservations—none at all. Instead she felt a great surge of peace and thought of how her father would approve. Somehow he was behind all of this, she was sure. Mahrree shook her head just as vigorously as she had nodded it.

  “So I’ve actually rendered you speechless?!” Perrin grinned.

  “Yes! Yes, you have!” Mahrree shouted.

  “No, no, I haven’t, I see!” Perrin laughed. “But I think I know a way to keep you from speaking.” He stood up and pulled her up too. He released her hands and moved his up to hold her face.

  Mahrree panicked. She’d never kissed a man before, besides her father. And judging by the spark she saw in Perrin’s eyes, she was fairly confident he was not expecting a quick peck on the cheek. As he bent closer to her, she trembled.

  “WAIT!” she exclaimed. “Wait, I don’t know what I’m doing!”

  Perrin stopped just inches from her face. “What?”

  She squirmed. “I really don’t know how to do this. I’ve never kissed a man before!”

  Mahrree suspected this conversation wasn’t going right.

  Perrin relaxed, probably expecting to hear something worse.

  “Well, neither have I.” He smiled and cocked his head. “Understand,” he began patiently, but she took a nervous step back anyway as he kept his hold on her, “I haven’t exactly spent the last few years doing this every day either. But I do know a few things,” he continued. “And, well, I’m trying to kiss you for the first time, and, and . . . you begin with a warning?!” Frustration grew in his eyes, dimming the spark.

  “I thought you should know!” she whimpered.

  He narrowed his eyes and spoke slowly. “I am trying to make you stop talking, for just . . . one . . . moment.”

  “I know!” Mahrree bellowed, then bit her lip nervously. The longer she looked at him the worse she felt. She was going to lose him—she could feel it.

  Perrin released her face and stepped back to study her.

  “This is, this is . . . unexpected.”

  Mahrree cringed and wrung her hands. A first kiss was supposed to be instinctive and genuine—not, not this. She looked up at Perrin and realized he was as nervous as she was. How long had he been preparing for this moment, and she had knocked him off his course? She had no preparation at all!

  He pressed his lips together and continued to analyze her.

  Mahrree knew then that she’d ruined it all. Just as she had a most wonderful future in her grasp she was losing it because . . . because she was afraid that she didn’t know how to do something? Stupid, she told herself. What was she—

  She didn’t get to the end of her mental chastisement.

  Perrin stepped forward suddenly and wrapped his arms around her before she realized what he was doing. He mashed his mouth against hers before she could think about how to do it. She could think of nothing clearly, but in the stunned confusion of her mind was a sense of surprised bliss.

  A few seconds later he pulled away. Keeping her in his grasp, he whispered, “Now, was that so difficult?”

  “I’m not sure,” she admitted. “It happened so fast. Can we try that again?”

  “For my future wife, anything!” He grinned. “I have a feeling life with you will mean anticipating the unexpected, then finding my expectations exceeded in every possible way.”

  “That wasn’t entirely coherent,” she gently pointed out.

  He sighed in satisfaction. “That’s just what you do to me. As long as it’s only you who knows what power you have over me, I should still be able to maintain my reputation.”

  Sometime during their long second attempt Mahrree decided that kissing him wasn’t going to be difficult at all.

  The rest of the evening they sat huddled together on the small sofa planning, discussing, and laughing. It felt surprisingly natural, as if they had always been this way. They decided that after such a public courtship, their marriage ceremony should be small and private with just Mahrree’s mother, Rector Densal who would perform the ceremony, Tabbit Densal, and Perrin’s parents, since the High General was planning to be in the area in about three moons to inspect the fort. To make up for the small ceremony, they decided to have a large celebration afterwards as was tradition in Edge, where every
one came with a dish of food to share along with a piece of useless advice.

  Perrin left Mahrree’s home that evening—to be his home as well in a season, they decided, since it was relatively close to the new fort—at an appropriate hour and with a stack of books.

  Noticing the neighbors across the road sitting on their front porch to enjoy the surprisingly warm night air, he announced loudly, “Thank you for your information and time, Miss Mahrree. I’ll enjoy reading these books.”

  Mahrree’s neighbors, a middle-aged couple she’d known since she was a child, just smiled and nodded at him.

  Then they winked at each other.

  ---

  Lieutenant Karna was in the forward command office going over the next day’s work assignments awaiting the return of the captain. Frequently the old sergeant major trotted up the stairs and raised his eyebrows in questioning.

  “No third hole in the office . . . yet!”

  Wiles would chuckle all the way down the stairs.

  The fourth time Wiles came up the stairs, looking a bit tired from his journeys, he plopped down on one of the chairs by the large work desk.

  “Whew! Now I know why I never married and had children.” He took off his cap to smooth his thin, gray hair. “Waiting up for them is exhausting.”

  Karna grinned. “Wiles, I can just let you know when he comes in.”

  Wiles smiled slyly at him. “Getting rather late now, Lieutenant. My guess is, it’s been a successful evening, and he’s not coming in until morning.”

  Karna shook his head. “The captain’s not that kind of man, Sergeant Major. I know him. And he’ll be back up here before he retires for the night to brief the night shift.”

  Wiles sniggered and put a boot casually on the corner of the desk.

  “You haven’t been in the army as long as I have, Lieutenant. I see now why Chairman Mal himself said my wisdom was needed up here.” He puffed up his narrow chest. “I suppose if I weren’t so wise, I’d have been given a position somewhere warmer. But, the High General agreed with Mal, and so I’m here to teach all of you boys a thing or two. Here’s your first lesson: no man is exactly as he presents himself. There’s the public man, and then there’s the private man. Shin puts up an excellent public front. I’ve heard he handled himself quite well at those debates, and so far the village seems completely enamored with him. So likely is that lovely young woman. But privately, Shin’s a man with needs, Lieutenant. And when an animal feels a need . . .” He raised his eyebrows and leered. “Now, you just run along to your quarters. I’ll brief the night shift. Shin will be back in the morning—”