Beary Sexy: A BBW Werebear Boxed Set
Page 19
It was no ordinary orgasm, no ordinary lovemaking, and she knew it had something to do with the animal inside her, but she didn’t know how. She just knew that she wanted to stay with him, forever. Do this with him, forever. However impossible that might be, she wanted it.
And as he slumped against her, murmuring her name over and over, she knew he wanted it too.
She knew that nothing that came after this could be as beautiful as what had just happened. So she just waited, letting her breath return to normal, and savoring the feel of him still inside her. His rapid breaths, and his heartbeat against her chest.
“Leslie…I…” he said.
“Yes?”
“I don’t even know what that was,” he said.
She smiled weakly against his shoulder. “Beats me.”
“But I do know I want to do that again,” he said, lifting up to look down at her.
“Me too,” she replied, tucking his head down and running a hand through his hair tenderly.
He swore. “It shouldn’t be that good,” he said.
She said nothing, but those were her thoughts exactly.
Chapter 6
Riley’s heart pounded in his chest. What he’d just had with Leslie was like nothing he’d ever experienced, and he bit his lip as he thought about the ramifications.
Maybe he’d just been alone for too long. But as he rolled over, grabbing a towel to cover himself, and lay on his back next to Leslie, he couldn’t help noticing that instead of wanting to rush off to the shower, he sort of just wanted to stay here and hold her hand. Just enjoy the moment.
He eyed her from the corner of his vision and tried to act as if he were looking straight up at the ceiling.
“Leslie?” he finally asked, unable to take the silence. He didn’t know what he’d say after, didn’t know what she wanted him to say. He just knew that if he didn’t do something, his bear would start roaring nonsense about mates. And he couldn’t have that.
Even if the thought of it felt so right.
“Yes?” she asked quietly. She turned to look over at him and he didn’t know what to say. Her face tightened slightly, and he gnawed the inside of his cheeks, wondering what would be appropriate.
She sighed and eyed the clock when he didn’t say anything. “I’ve gotta get dressed. If we’re going to the doctor, I need to get over there before I have to start taking care of things at the bar.”
“When do you need to go in?”
“Ten,” she said.
“For a bar?”
She shrugged. “Gives me time to get things set up, get the till in order, make sure the employees come in.”
He rolled to his side and balanced his head on his hand. “So cool that you own your own business.”
She bit her lip. “Working on it.”
He had the oddest urge to reach for the lone black curl that had fallen over her face, so he did, gently placing it back with the others in a softly tangled mass. Her face still glowed from what they’d done together. “You look gorgeous in the morning.”
She gave him a long, appreciative glance. “So do you.”
Tell her, something inside him said. Tell her she’s your mate. Put yourself out there.
He tightened his jaw. Never. Besides, she was human, how would he ever explain? And if something happened to her as a result of the shock of what he had to tell her, he’d never forgive himself. He’d have two huge burdens of shame to carry around.
He eyed Leslie. He wondered what it would feel like to actually be able to consider staying with a beautiful woman like her for life. Just the two of them, sharing everything. The thought of what he couldn’t have brought a painful lump into his throat.
“Leslie…” he began, wanting to say something to clarify things between them, to make sure things were clear. That last thing he wanted to do was mislead or hurt her.
She put up a hand. “Don’t,” she said. “I know what you’re going to say, but I’m not one of those people who says she isn’t looking for commitment and then changes her mind after sex. That was fun, and I wouldn’t mind doing it again, but if you’re sitting there getting ideas about feeling guilty for giving me the best time of my life, don’t.”
“I’m sorry,” he said quietly.
She huffed and sat up, reaching for her bra and shirt. “Stop it. Stop acting like it’s some Greek tragedy. We had sex, it was awesome. Maybe we’ll do it again. Maybe not.” She gave him a wink that didn’t seem as playful as maybe she wanted it to look. He tilted his head at her as he continued.
“But either way, don’t pity me. Don’t insult me by acting like you know what I want better than I do. For all you know, I don’t want to settle down with some jet-setting celebrity who I can’t trust not to cheat all the time.”
His brows came down. “What? Why would I cheat? Not that we’re together, but how does my being a celebrity lead to cheating?”
She shrugged as she gingerly pulled her pants on around her injured foot. “Opportunity. If even normal men cheat so easily, what stops famous men from doing it when women are throwing themselves all over them?”
Riley scratched his head. “What do you mean, if normal men cheat so easily?”
Her face tightened, like he’d come too close to one of her sensitive issues with that question. “Nothing. I mean, just look at Janna. Before she met Ryder, she’d been cheated on.”
“And now she’s met Ryder, and she won’t be cheated on,” he said.
“Hmph,” Leslie said. “It’s not over till we’re dead. He could still cheat. Or leave.”
Riley frowned as he headed to the bathroom to start cleaning up. When he was done, he came out and started changing back into his rumpled clothes.
“That’s a pretty bleak assessment of men, Les,” he said, putting on his watch.
She shrugged. “I don’t want to talk about it. I prefer a quick fling with no expectations to a heartbreak.”
He reached for her hand as she started edging toward the side of the bed to get off of it. Her hand was small, soft, and darker than his. But it looked just right there. So right. “Leslie, we aren’t together.”
“I know,” she snapped.
“But if we were, I’d never cheat. Or leave you.”
She looked up at him with dark, resolute eyes. “I imagine most men say the same thing. Who knows what the chances are that they’re telling the truth?”
He pulled his hand away. He had his own problems with trust. Trust that people could accept all of him, trust that they could handle it. He didn’t need her issues as well. He knew a lot about himself, but he knew one thing for sure, he wasn’t like that.
And Ryder wasn’t either. He’d found his mate and claimed her. That was serious business in the shifter world. That meant that Janna was his and his alone, and Ryder was hers and hers alone. They’d be disgustingly romantic and never see anyone but the other sexually for the rest of their lives. Fully committed.
After lying there with Leslie, Riley sort of saw the appeal of the whole thing. Interesting that the very bear that made it impossible for him to be with someone like Janna was also the reason he knew that if they were together, she’d be safe with him and he’d never cheat on her.
His father had been a player, but it hadn’t been out of his own choice. His brothers had seemed to really blame their dad, but Riley had often been his dad’s confidant. He knew how pressured Dad had felt by the bear community, to try and keep the species going. Ryder had theorized that maybe mating with one mate was actually the best way to have kids. Not that that was why he’d gotten with Janna. He’d just fallen in love at first sight and set out to convince her of the same thing.
But Ryder had a point. Their father had only had progeny with that one woman, as far as they knew. And all three had come out bears. Perhaps if he’d been around protecting her, instead of out cheating, their mom wouldn’t have been driving alone and would still be alive.
If Riley ever did take a mate, he knew he wo
uldn’t do what his dad did. Unlike his brothers, he could sense his dad’s regret long before their mom died. If he took a mate, it would be forever, just them, holed up in a cabin in the mountains.
The thought almost took his breath away, as did the fact that it was Leslie in the picture with him.
He checked his watch and helped her gently to her feet. “I guess we’d better head out.”
“I guess so,” she said, at first removing her hand from his, and then resting both hands on his forearms for strength. She tried to set down her foot, but winced.
“Don’t put weight on it,” he said. “Even if you can move it fine, you probably shouldn’t put weight on it until we know what’s going on. And have a brace to keep it aligned.”
She groaned. “Fine. So how do we get outside?”
He grinned. That part he could help with. With pleasure. He put out both hands in front of him, offering to scoop her up in his arms. “Milady, your carriage awaits.”
She rolled her eyes, but she also let him swoop her soft body up against his chest.
That was best feeling in the world. Not just the feeling of her soft curves against him, but the feeling of being trusted. Allowed to protect.
Riley had the feeling that this could get addictive if he let it.
* * *
Leslie’s heart sunk at the doctor’s prognosis.
A mild sprain, but she should stay in a brace and try to keep her weight off it as much as possible.
Riley had looked like a cat with a canary in its mouth. Why he’d look so elated about working with her when he so clearly wanted to make sure she knew it was a one-night stand between them, she didn’t know.
She couldn’t figure out why the big man wanted to follow her around, but now that she thought about it, he’d basically been doing it since he and his brothers had come to town. The thought was puzzling, so she pushed it aside.
Along with her bear’s insistence that this was her mate.
Leslie hadn’t ever turned into her bear or let her bear side out. She never smelled or sensed other bears, and she’d given up trying long ago. After all, as her mom had said, bears were rare. The chance of her finding another one was slim. And, according to her mom, if you found one, you wouldn’t want one, because they were promiscuous as hell.
Apparently Leslie’s dad had worked his being a bear into him leaving them for other women. He’d used it as an excuse, and as a result, Leslie’s mother hated all of bear society and everything to do with it. And most men, too.
As a result, Leslie had a whole part of herself that she knew nothing about. But her life was still good. She had the bar, her visits with her mom, good girlfriends like Janna and Kylie, and hot guys passing through at regular intervals who were happy to spend some time with the local bartender.
If it sometimes ached a bit that she’d never have a family or settle down, she never allowed it to ache for long. Hope was a silly thing when you already had a great life.
When she’d insisted on going in and getting ready on her own, Riley had reluctantly agreed and promised to meet her at the bar in an hour. But all she’d done since getting home was manage to shower and dress. Which was hard with a limp. She’d been unable to wear her brace, since she hadn’t wanted to get it wet, and she’d slipped and banged her elbow on the ground when she went down. But she was clean for the most part, and that felt good.
But she wasn’t looking forward to doing it again. Maybe she should ask Riley for help with that, she thought. The sudden image of him, hands between her legs, washing her gently while kissing her voraciously, rose to her mind and she felt blood rush into her cheeks. Damn, he had an effect on her. And her bear knew just what it was.
Mate, it kept saying.
But what did that even mean? Did bears have mates? Didn’t her mom say they were promiscuous? That it was just part of their nature?
She held bobby pins in her mouth as she gathered her unruly curls and twisted them up into a ponytail holder. Then she slipped on a headband to hold any wisps trying to escape. She sighed at her reflection in the mirror. Not great, but it would have to do.
She swiped on some concealer to cover the dark circles under her eyes from not sleeping well, and blended it with some foundation and powder that made her look much fresher. Then she swiped on some red lip gloss that just gave her lips the slightest cherry tint and some shine, and finished up by brushing on a couple coats of mascara.
There. Much better.
The outfit she was wearing had been chosen for comfort, but it wasn’t unflattering. The deep blue of the shirt made her skin look more refreshed than she felt, and the soft black pants nicely accentuated her rear.
Not that there was anyone to impress.
You know damn well there is, her bear said.
She shrugged. Looking good just felt good. That was all. She slung her purse over her shoulder and headed out the door to conquer the problem that was the stairs.
Ten minutes later she pulled up in front of the bar. Riley’s car was already out front, shiny and fancy-looking. She’d never get used to being around someone with that kind of money.
She didn’t know how Janna coped with Ryder being a billionaire. It just felt like that would come with a lot of trouble, a lot of responsibility.
A big alimony payment after the divorce, after someone cheated.
Because everything had to end at some point, right? According to her mom.
Not that Leslie only listened to her mom. At first, she’d gone through a rebellious phase where she’d been sure her mom was wrong. That men could and would stay. And then life in this town had proven her wrong. Men that said they would stay, men that promised things, men that didn’t, all of them left.
And Leslie found the only thing that stopped it from hurting was to just expect them to go. So she did.
She opened the door to the bar and saw Riley behind it. “What…”
“Sorry, I borrowed your extra keys,” he said, grinning. He had a rag in his hand and had been wiping down the bar. Didn’t she do that last night? Maybe she’d been too drunk to do a good job.
Still, the sight of 6’7” Riley Hart, freshly showered and dressed in a light-blue, tailored button-up shirt that emphasized every ridge of his muscles, handling a dirty rag and washing her bar, nearly bowled her over.
Her knees felt weak. Or was that just her ankle?
Riley’s eyes widened as he noticed her stumbling and he was at the door in an instant, catching her with one arm and holding the door open with the other.
“It looks great in here,” she said, looking around. “You did this?”
“He had help,” a deep voice said from the hallway. Ryan, Riley’s younger brother, came out from the hallway, mop and rolling bucket in front of him. He tipped the baseball hat he was wearing to Leslie and started washing the floor. “I already did the hallway.”
She laughed and let Riley lead her to a stool by the till. “So, this is your cleaning crew?”
Ryan shrugged. “I owed him one.”
“What for?” she asked.
Riley gave her a glare of mock sternness. His gorgeous, brown and gold hair was tousled to perfection this morning, but she couldn’t help preferring how it had looked when she’d had her hands in it.
“Now, don’t go poking into brotherly business,” he said playfully. “Here there be monsters.”
“Don’t you mean, there there be monsters?”
Riley shook his head and wrung the rag out in the sink. “No, that sounds weird.”
“Sometimes it’s the correct way to do things that seems weird,” she said, reaching over the counter like he had done for a cherry the other day. She nearly swiped one when he gently brushed her hand away.
“No,” he said. “Have you had a proper breakfast yet?”
She flushed. “No.”
He pulled a cup with a lid and straw from under the counter in front of him. “I brought this for you. I made smoothies this morning and thought
you’d like one.”
Leslie felt eyes on her and looked up to see Ryan staring at them open-mouthed, like the sun had just risen in the wrong part of the sky.
“What’s wrong?” she asked him.
He blinked and went back to mopping. “I don’t know. Nothing.”
“No, what is it?” She persisted. “You looked at me like I’d grown a third eye.
Ryan was tan, with very light blond hair and piercing blue eyes. He was a product of being outside. Tall and muscled. A less refined version of Riley and with differently coloring. “It just seems like there’s more between you two than a broken ankle.”
“Sprained,” she said, correcting him.
“Sprained,” he said, shrugging and going back to mopping. “But it seems to me that Riley wouldn’t make a girl breakfast just to make up for her getting injured.” He gave her a small smile that made her feel heat and embarrassment down to her toes.
He knew.
Riley, thankfully, didn’t seem to be so aware of his brother’s insinuations. “Smoothies aren’t breakfast,” he said. “Smoothies are life.”
Leslie bit her lip. Riley was only making his brother’s point even more. That there was something between them that no one was talking about.
But if she didn’t confirm it, maybe Ryan would give up on it. She didn’t think Riley was the kind of man who would understand even if it was right in front of him. Of all the non-committal men she’d ever met, he was the most openly against it. And she appreciated that honesty. It was what made things work well between them.
Even if a little part of her kept aching over the thought of losing him.
No, not aching. She felt like her bear would run grieving through the woods, unable to think, unable to breathe, once he was gone. But her mom had survived it, and so would she. And other men had left before.
She continued trying to build up the steel barrier inside her heart that would protect her when he decided to go back to his life in Hollywood and forget all about her.