Lifelong Affair

by Carole Mortimer

  'No. And look,' Morgan touched his shoulder with soft fingertips.

  He looked down at the ragged flesh her nails had raked during a moment of exquisite ecstasy, grinning widely. 'I wonder if we'll both survive the honeymoon!'

  Survive it they did! It was a time of lazing on the beach, of preparing and eating leisurely meals together, but most of all a time of discovering each other, of a single caress igniting a flame that often took hours to quench.

  Alex had hired a villa, and apart from the girl who came in to clean every morning they saw no one. Their beach was a private one, and on the last day Morgan finally persuaded her husband to bathe naked, something he had been reluctant to do.

  'We could get arrested for this,' he told her as they walked hand in hand into the blue water.

  She gave him a teasing look. 'This is nothing to what we'll be doing on the beach later!'

  Alex laughed throatily. He had laughed a lot during their three weeks alone together, and was nothing like the cold austere man who had gone to Los Angeles to see her that first time. She hoped he would never return.

  But the closer they got to England the next day the more withdrawn and terse Alex became, despite her efforts to tease him out of it. By the time they began the drive back from Heathrow to pick up Courtney it was almost impossible to believe the man at her side had made love to her on the beach in broad daylight the day before, that he had chased her back across the golden sand to the villa wearing nothing but his wedding ring.

  Barbados seemed a lifetime away, not a day, and Morgan was feeling thoroughly miserable about the change in her husband by the time they reached the Hammond house.

  "We won't be staying, will we, Alex?' she prompted anxiously. Her mother-in-law's probing taunts weren't something she welcomed right now. She was having a hard enough time reconciling herself to the fact that Alex had returned to his unapproachable self without that!

  He glanced at his watch as they walked towards the house. 'It's twelve-thirty, almost time for lunch,' he told her pointedly.

  'But--- '

  'We can hardly grab Courtney and run, he derided. 'Don't be such a child, Morgan!'

  Dull colour flooded her cheeks. She had completely lost her own protective shield during their honeymoon, had become used to Alex's words of admiration and encouragement rather than his aloofness. Her mask of sophistication slipped easily back into place as she watched Rita Hammond greet her son warmly before giving a cool nod in her direction.

  'Did you have a nice holiday in Barbados, darling?' Rita Hammond asked Alex as they went through to the lounge, Morgan trailing along behind them.

  'Barbados is always—pleasant,' he drawled in reply,

  stretching his long length in one of the comfortable armchairs.

  Morgan gave him a sharp look. Pleasant? Their honeymoon had been pleasant! Her expression was cool as she sensed Rita Hammond's triumphant gaze on her, meeting the blue-eyed gaze challengingly. 'If you'll both excuse me I think I'll go and see Courtney,' she said stiltedly, not waiting for either of them to answer her but sweeping out of the room.

  She didn't stop until she stood outside Courtney's room, taking time to steady her breathing, feeling the familiar tension at being anywhere near Rita Hammond.

  Alex's sudden coldness after the warmth of the last three weeks cut into her like a knife. She hadn't believed it was possible after the degree of intimacy they had attained, when only a look or a smile was needed to tell them what the other desired. A shield had fallen over Alex's inner emotions now, leaving only the cynical stranger she had known before.

  And she wouldn't let him do that to them! Soon they would be at their own home, alone together again except for the baby. Whatever was bothering Alex she meant to find out as soon as possible; there would be no festering misunderstandings in this marriage if she could help it; they had too much to lose now.

  But it seemed Alex had other ideas than their going home to be alone!

  'I'll drop you and Courtney off at the house,' he told her over lunch. I have to go into the office for a couple of hours this afternoon.'

  Morgan blinked her surprise; he hadn't mentioned anything about this on the drive here. 'Do you have to?' she asked stiffly, very conscious of his mother's avid attention on their conversation.

  His mouth tightened. 'I would hardly be going if I didn't have to, he snapped. 'I've been away for overthree weeks already—Hammond Industries doesn't run itself, you know.

  She flinched at the way he made it seem as if he wished he hadn't spent the three weeks honeymooning with her, as if it had been time he had wasted. 'I do know,' she replied coldly, holding back the tremor from her voice. How could he talk to her like this in front of his mother?

  'It would seem the honeymoon is over,' Rita Hammond drawled with satisfaction.

  Alex's hard gaze flickered briefly over Morgan. 'It would seem so,' he agreed tautly.

  'The newspapers got hold of the story of your wedding, by the way,' his mother told him. 'The press have been most intrusive.'

  'We know,' Alex acknowledged abruptly.

  It had been the one upset to their honeymoon. They had left the villa to go into the nearest small town to pick up fresh supplies, and Alex had been instantly cornered by a member of the press -also on holiday there, wanting an exclusive about their marriage. Alex's reply had been far from polite!

  'Is Courtney ready, Morgan?' he asked tersely now. 'I think we should be going.

  'But your coffee- '

  'I don't want any,' Alex cut across his mother's objection. 'Morgan?'

  The query seemed to come as an afterthought, and Morgan felt the pain in her heart deepen. How different this meal had been from the ones they had been preparing for themselves at the villa; their happiness together then had been unmistakable. Alex couldn't seem to wait to get rid of her for a few hours now! 'No, thank you,' she refused abruptly, standing up. 'I'll go and get Courtney—Mrs Ford said she would have him ready to leave after lunch.

  Courtney was indeed ready to leave, his clothes were in a suitcase, his nursery things all packed into boxes, while the baby himself was fast asleep.

  'I shall miss him,' Mrs Ford said ruefully as she handed the shawl-wrapped baby to Morgan.

  'Please feel free to come and visit him any time you want to,' Morgan invited warmly. 'You'll always be welcome.'

  'Thank you, I'd like that,' the other woman accepted shyly.

  Morgan waited in the lounge with Rita Hammond while Alex and Symonds loaded the car up with Courtney's things; the silence between the two women was filled with tension—on Morgan's part at least, Rita Hammond looked as confident as ever. And why shouldn't she when her son had just told her his honeymoon had been pleasantl The description still rankled.

  'So you failed to keep my son's attention even for the honeymoon,' Rita scorned. 'I knew it, of course. You're the same butterfly as Glcnna.'

  'Leave Glcnna out of this!' Morgan ground out,

  'Gladly,' the other woman dismissed haughtily. 'And I'll leave you out of it too once Alex realises the full extent of his mistake in marrying you. It's obvious he's already regretting his impetuosity!'

  The baby stirred restlessly in her arms, as if even in his sleep he could sense the antagonism about him. Morgan gave up any idea of this conversation with Rita Hammond turning out to be a pleasant one, and left the house with her head held high. Alex and Symonds were just putting the last of the boxes in the car as she came down the steps, and Alex came forward to help her, handing her into the back of the car.

  'Perhaps you could go and thank your mother for lunch,' she told Alex stiffly. 'I'm afraid I forgot.'

  He gave her a probing glance before turning to go back into the house. His mother was at his side when he returned.

  'Could I hold Courtney for a few minutes—please?' she added as an imperious afterthought.

  Morgan handed him to the other woman, seeing how the harsh features relaxed into a smile as she gazed down at her gra
ndson. Maybe there was hope for the other woman yet, if she could feel love for the baby! 'Come and see him any rime you would like to, she said impulsively.

  Cold blue eyes raked over her disdainfully. 'I intended to,' Rita told Morgan indignantly. 'He is my grandson.'

  'And it's Morgan's home, Alex put in softly, taking Courtney to put him back into Morgan's arms. She gave him a grateful smile for his defence of her. 'And my son's!'

  He shrugged. 'Morgan will spend more time there than I shall.'

  'Thank you,' Morgan told him quietly as they drove the ten miles to their own house.

  'It's the truth,' he dismissed tersely. 'And as the two of you don't get along . . .'

  She chewed on her bottom lip, braving the hardness of his profile. 'Alex, did you really think our honeymoon was only pleasant?' Her mouth twisted as she asked.

  He didn't even glance at her. 'I believe I said Barbados was pleasant, I didn't mention our honeymoon,' he bit out tautly. 'I would hardly tell my mother we rarely left the bedroom!

  He made even that sound like an insult! 'Why not?' she snapped. 'It's what most people do on their honeymoon!'

  He gave her a look of disgust. 'Maybe I just didn't want to boast,' he taunted. Morgan gave a disappointed sigh. The indulgentlover from Barbados was sadly gone. The man in his place was even harder than the Alex Hammond she had known before. 'Do you really have to go to the office today?' She looked at him anxiously, sitting forward to touch his shoulder.

  'I've just spent three weeks alone with you, Morgan, wasn't that enough?' he rasped scornfully.

  She moved back as if he had struck her. The honeymoon really was over!

  She made no demur as, once he had settled Courtney and herself into the house, Alex left almost immediately for London. He had made it more than plain that he needed to be away from her, to be with someone other than her after their seclusion. And while she missed him unbearably she understood that there were some men who needed more of a challenge in conversation and ideas than she, as a woman, was able to give. She just hadn't thought Alex was one of those men . . .

  Courtney kept the rest of her day occupied. He was taking an interest in things about him now, able to concentrate for short periods of time as she played with a toy with him, and he fell asleep as she softly sang to him.

  'Mr Hammond called about ten minutes ago, madam,' the middle-aged housekeeper Alex had employed told her as she came downstairs. 'When I told him you were with the baby he said not to disturb you.'

  'Did he leave a message?' she asked impatiently, wishing she could have talked to Alex herself, wanting desperately to bridge the gulf that had yawned between them.

  'He said he had been delayed in London, and—and for you not to wait dinner for him,' Mrs Whitney smiled with relief as she finished reciting the message.

  'Thank you,' Morgan said dully. Suddenly she hadlost her own appetite. 'Don't bother with dinner then, Mrs Whitney. I'll have something later if I get hungry. But she knew she wouldn't, the thought of eating nauseated her.

  She was totally bewildered by Alex's coldness, this not wanting to be with her. An afternoon at work she could perhaps accept, but an evening too! No, she didn't believe for a moment that Alex was staying in London this evening on business.

  He hadn't returned at ten-thirty when she had given Courtney his late night feed and settled him down until morning, having got to the stage, at six weeks, where he slept through. She decided she might as well go to bed herself. Alex might not come back at all tonight!

  Their bedroom had been decorated in a soft green and cream, very restful, and yet Morgan didn't feci in the least sleepy. How could Alex do this to her on their first evening in their new home! Anger took over from hurt, and by the time she heard the Mercedes coming down the driveway and pull up outside the house she was at boiling point. She would not be treated like this!

  She was standing in the middle of the room when she heard Alex's ascent up the stairs, her black nightgown clinging seductively to her rose-tipped breasts, the sheerness of the material clearly showing the rest of her body. If Alex expected her to be the son of wife who cowed in bed pretending to be asleep rather than risk confrontation then he was mistaken; she wasn't the one arriving home at eleven o'clock at night after supposedly going to the officel

  Alex came to a halt in the doorway as he saw her standing proudly in front of him. 'Morgan,' he drawled, then recovered quickly, closing the door quietly and coming in to remove his tie. ' thought you'd be asleep,' he raised dark brows questioningly.

  'Did you?' she snapped. 'I wouldn't have thought you'd had the time to think of mc at all—or that you would want to.'

  His mouth tightened. 'Morgan '

  She glared at him with sparkling green eyes. 'If you want to discontinue the physical side of our marriage, Alex, then just say so,' she told him abruptly. 'If I failed to give you pleasure then tell me so. You don't have to stay out of your own home just to avoid me. I—Oh!' she gasped as she was pulled roughly into his arms.

  'Discontinue the physical side of our marriage!' he repeated fiercely, shaking her. 'You can talk in such a businesslike way of the explosion of the senses we share?' he grated.

  'You seem to want it businesslike,' she choked emotionally.

  'I want you. God . ..!' he groaned as he pulled her against his chest. 'You give me pleasure unspeakable, unimaginable. And I wasn't avoiding you,' he spoke into the softness of her hair. 'At least, not voluntarily. I was giving you the chance to end the physical relationship, to end the honeymoon if you wanted to.' He pulled back to look at her tear-wct face. 'You don't want to, do you?' he realised huskily.

  'Never!' She buried her face against his chest. 'I want you so much!'

  'And I want you,' he admitted savagely, stripping off their clothes without concern for their welfare, tearing them if they wouldn't come off quickly enough, taking her fiercely, possessively, but knowing she was with him every minute, that she even revelled in his savagery.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  FOR a woman who had been married a little over two months Morgan had a glow about her that made her blush whenever she happened to catch sight of her reflection in a mirror. Two months of being Alex's wife, of spending every night in his arms, bathed in his never-ending lovemaking, had given her a happiness she could hardly believe was possible.

  There had been no repeats of their first evening back, no more late nights in London or anywhere else. She had never questioned Alex as to his whereabouts that night, and he had never offered the information. It was enough for her that there were no repeats of it.

  And Courtney, at three months old, seemed to react to the air of happiness that surrounded the woman he considered his mother. He was the most placid of babies, starting to smile now, loving it when his daddy played gently on the bed with him.

  They were so much like any normal family, with none of the tragic circumstances that had brought them all together overshadowing the relationship, that she felt no qualms about inviting Rita Hammond over to tea one afternoon. Alex had taken Courtney over to see his mother once a week for the last six weeks since their return from Barbados, but never once had he invited her here, possibly sensing Morgan's reluctance from their last meeting.

  But today she was feeling very happy with the world, andl had invited the other woman over this afternoon for tea. Rita Hammond had seemed rather stunned yesterday on the telephone by such a formal invitation to her son's house, but she had accepted

  anyway. Alex had merely raised his brows when she told him of the invitation, a habit she had learnt meant he was puzzled. She was a little puzzled by this herself, had felt herself well rid of Rita Hammond the last few weeks, but she was after all Alex's mother, and they couldn't keep up this vendetta of hatred for ever. At least, she couldn't; she had a feeling Rita Hammond could, though!

  Her mother-in-law arrived promptly at four-thirty that afternoon, had driven herself over in the Rolls. Morgan felt relieved when she saw the other woman's
appearance that she had changed for the occasion, putting on a royal blue pants suit. Rita's pure silk dress was an attractive shade of silver-grey, very attractive on the older woman, although Morgan eyed the expensive dress with a sense of unease. She had learnt that although she liked to dress attractively herself it wasn't always wise to dress expensively, not with a young baby about. Obviously Rita Hammond had forgotten what it was like when her children were babies!

  The other woman looked critically about the lounge, at the rust-coloured suite, the mottled gold carpet, rust-coloured curtains, the beautifully ornate coffee-table, several lamps placed about the room. Morgan tried to see the room through the other woman's eyes; and could find no fault with it.

  'You have an attractive home, at least,' Rita said grudgingly after several awkward minutes. 'You had professional help with the decor, no doubt.'

  'No,' Morgan smiled at the other woman's attempt to belittle what she had done with the house. 'Before I became an actress I studied interior decorating.'

  'How useful!' Rita said disdainfully.

  'Yes. Would you like me to bring Courtney down now?'

  'Well, that is why I'm here!

  She raised mocking brows. 'I thought you were here for tea,' she derided before going upstairs to get Courtney as he awakened from his nap. She was glad she could find something amusing about Rita's attitude; she had a feeling she was going to need a sense of humour during this visit from her mother-in-law.

  Luckily Courtney managed to bridge some of the awkwardness, both women obviously doting on him. They watched in amusement as he lay on the floor moving his arms and legs about in an effort to crawl, becoming red-faced with anger as he didn't move a fraction of an inch.

  'The exercise is good for him,' Morgan said laughingly as she gathered the baby up in her arms, soothing his indignant wails, almost as if he had been sure he had been about to crawl if she hadn't picked him up. 'It will strengthen his muscles, the health visitor told me.' She nuzzled into Courtney's neck, soon hearing his delighted gurgles.

  'I have no doubt about Courtney's health,' Rita said haughtily. 'I'm just wondering when you're going to tire of this latest role.'