by Ray Gordon
"Really? What was he doing there?"
"He was after the nuns again. I'd set a trap, lured him to the convent yesterday, but he somehow got away. His insatiable thirst for wild sex is repugnant in the extreme."
"An insatiable thirst for wild sex? Surely the people of Cumsdale Village know of his behaviour? I've only been here for a month, but I've already heard several rumours concerning Entercock's escapades. To be honest, I didn't realize the full extent of his lecherous ways."
"You don't know the half of it, Father Kosher. Look at him wearing that cassock. He is not a priest. We should join forces, Father. Join forces against the evil forces that evil man is calling upon."
"Satan?"
"No, you and me. We should take up arms against Entercock."
"Take up arms? You mean, fight him?"
"Not physically. But we should conspire against him. I'd go as far as to say that we should form a sectarian faction."
"Surely that's obscene?"
"Of course it's not. A sectarian faction is a bunch of people against Entercock."
"Ah, yes. I agree, Reverend Mother. What shall we do?"
"Lay another trap for him. I want you to invite him to your church, Father." Pursing her lips, she was obviously deep in thought as Entercock rambled on about incest. "Do you know any very attractive, very promiscuous teenage girls?" she finally asked.
"Goodness me, Reverend Mother. Certainly not."
"Are you sure you can't lay your hand on one?"
"Lay my hands... Of course I'm sure. The very suggestion offends me."
"In that case, my plan will be a non-starter."
"Oh. Well... I suppose I do know one girl. Or two or three. Say, half a dozen at a push."
"Good, good. Have one of them in your church this afternoon."
"Have one in my church?" he echoed, aghast.
"Preferably two."
"Two at once? Reverend Mother," he whispered, looking about him, "do you realize what it is you're asking me to do?"
"Of course, Father Kosher. What's the matter? Can't you manage it?"
"I... I suppose I could try. It's been such a long time since I..."
"This is the plan," she broke in eagerly. "Have the girls against the wall by the flower stand. Entercock will arrive and..."
"I can't agree to that, Reverend Mother. I mean, someone might come in and see me. God might be watching. Couldn't I have them over my office desk?"
"Over your office desk? Entercock would think that rather odd. It's not normal to come across two girls over a desk. They'd rouse his suspicion. You'll have them up against the wall."
"We're supposed to be catching him in the act, not me. I'll have them over the desk, if it's all the same to you. I'll have them from behind."
"Father Kosher! I have not devised this dastardly plan to satisfy your lusts."
"But... I meant..."
"The idea is that Entercock arrives and the girls happen to be milling around by the flowers. He'll get chatting to them and, knowing him, one thing will lead to another. The police will be in hiding."
"I don't quite follow, Reverend Mother. How does my having sex against the wall with the girls help trap Entercock?"
"What's the matter with you, man? Is that all you think about? Sex?"
"Yes. I mean, no. I thought you meant..."
"Two o'clock."
"Is it? I thought it was almost twelve."
"Have the girls in the church at two o'clock. I'll get word to Entercock that there are two very voluptuous beauties..."
"Bending over my office desk?"
"How old are you, Father Kosher?"
"Sixty-two... I think."
"The male menopause, that's what it is. Please, stop thinking about having sex with girls bending over your desk and pay attention. The girls will me milling around, admiring the flowers. The police will be in hiding and when Entercock strikes they'll leap out and arrest him for gross indecency. Right, I have to make plans. Go and get your end sorted out and I'll..."
"There's nothing wrong with my end, Reverend Mother. I'll have you know I have a fine end."
"The church and the girls, man. Prepare the church and the girls."
"Oh, I see. Two o'clock?"
"Two o'clock."
Leaving his soapbox, Will headed for the local pub and ordered a pint of bitter. The villagers of Cumsdale now knew that he was back in business, and he reckoned that they'd be flocking to his church, and his new bar, in their droves. Slurping his pint, he thought himself lucky to have managed to slip out of the laundry room window and slide down the drainpipe before the hag-bag and the police discovered him. Making off with twenty or so pairs of knickers stuffed up his cassock, he'd thought himself more than lucky.
"How's it going?" Jack asked.
"Ah, landlord," Will grinned. "The bar is amazing. Those blokes did a damned good job."
"They're fucking good lads, as long as you don't upset them. So, the bar's for your private fucking use?"
"Yes, that's right. It was Josie's idea."
"Liar."
"OK, so it would have been her idea had she thought of it. I'm hoping to open the bar for business... For my private use, this evening. Would you happen to have a couple of spare barrels?"
"How much do you intend to fucking drink?"
"Er... Quite a lot. One lager and one bitter would be fine. Oh, and some gas."
"Fucking gas?"
"If that's OK?"
"Cash?"
"But, of course."
"OK, I'll sort it. I'll have the lads do a drop later."
"Thanks, Jack. You're a mate."
"I'm a fucking idiot."
As the man wandered off to serve a customer, Will rubbed his hands together gleefully. This was only day two and, apart from the Reverend Slapper causing trouble, things were going very well. He'd spunked one nun's mouth, and fucked another nun's tight pussy. And he'd not even started on young Marianne. Finishing his pint, he left the pub and walked home. There was work to be done. The lounge converted into a church, the greenhouse cleared in readiness for the cannabis plants... There was no peace for the wicked, he chuckled inwardly, closing the front door and wandering into the bar.
He was hardly ready to open for business, but that didn't matter. Once the beer was flowing, the punters wouldn't give a damn about the seating arrangements or the decor. Leaning on the bar, he recalled his many trips to France. He'd have to resume his duty-free runs, he mused. Stocking up on booze was of paramount importance. But he'd also need a music system, a till, ice buckets, ashtrays, a fruit machine... Now there was a money spinner. There was a lot to do, but nothing was impossible. His only concern was Josie. She'd not phoned yet, which was just as well as he didn't like lying to her. Although he lied freely and frequently. She'd understand why he'd converted the dining room into a bar, wouldn't she? He'd make money, and lots of it. She'd not only understand but give her complete and utter support. And pigs might fly. The phone ringing, he wandered into the kitchen and lifted the receiver.
"Mr Entercock?" a female asked.
"Speaking."
"I'm not going to reveal my identity."
"Aren't you?"
"No."
"Have you lost your memory? Do you know who you are?"
"Of course I... All I'll say is that I'm an extremely worried villager."
"Oh?"
"I'm calling because I'm exceedingly concerned about a couple of girls. They hang around Father Kosher's church."
"Hang around? Who are they?"
"They're not from Cumsdale so I doubt that you'd know them. They're unsavoury girls, Mr Entercock. I believe that they're up to no good."
"I see. And, you think I can help?"
"I was hoping that you might try to save them from the wickedness of their wicked sins. They're usually at the church around two o'clock. I don't know what they get up to, exactly. But I do know they participate in highly questionable sexual practices. They only go to the chur
ch when Father Kosher isn't around. I was wondering whether you'd go along and..."
"Of course," Will agreed eagerly. A chance to meet two unsavoury girls who participated in highly questionable sexual practices? "I'll be there at two."
"That's very good of you."
"It'll be very good of the girls. Er... It's very good of you to tip me off about the horny little... About the girls' wicked ways."
"I'm sorry that I can't reveal my identity. It's just that..."
"I understand, Mrs Smythe-Cummings. Leave it to me. I shall guide the girls back onto the path of righteousness." And guide his cock up their pussies.
"Thank you, Mr Entercock. You've put my mind at rest."
This was a turn up for the books, Will mused, rubbing his crotch. With Father git-face Kosher out of the way, he'd have the church to himself. And the delectable girls. It wasn't that he didn't like old man Kosher. But he had been rather bigheaded since he'd arrived in the village a month previously. Building up his congregation and spreading the word that Cumsdale now had a decent church, a proper church... Entercock's church had been the best in the land, bulging at the seams every Sunday morning. People just couldn't keep away. Maybe it was because the basement bar opened at midday. But it was bums on pews that counted, and cash in the collection plates. And Will was an expert at both.
After a shower, he donned his cassock and slipped his shoes and socks on. Splashing aftershave over his face he brushed his dark hair back and admired his reflection in the hall mirror. His cock twitching expectantly, he left the house and walked down the lane with more than a spring in his step - and his balls. Father Kosher's church was almost a mile away, but Will was sure that the trek was going to be well worth it.
Passing the convent, he recalled climbing down the drainpipe the previous day. The old hag would have been seething with anger when she'd searched every square inch of the building and found no sign of him. And no doubt she'd looked a complete and utter fool in front of the police officer.
The birds singing, the sun shining, Will breathed in the country air, whistling to himself as he neared the church. This was just like the old days, he reflected. Naked beneath his cassock, the prospect of screwing a couple of horny girls... Two unsavoury girls who participated in highly questionable sexual practices? Deliberating on the questionable practices he'd participated in over the ears, he wondered what they were in to.
Finally entering the church, he checked his watch. He was half an hour early, but he could wait. Wandering down the aisle, he recalled his own church. The cold air of the stone building, the musk of time filling his nostrils, the altar... He'd had a few women over the altar in his time. Church candles, fingers, vibrators, his tongue, his cock... There had been dozens of insertions. His lounge was no substitute, but it was going to have to suffice for the time being.
Hearing voices outside, he slipped behind a pillar and peered out of the shadows. His lips furling into a wicked grin, he eyed the two girls as they looked about. Wearing miniskirts, they really were tasty. Their nipples pressing through their tight T-shirts, their long hair flowing over their shoulders, they were definitely ripe for a damned good shagging.
"He'll be half an hour, yet," the blonde sighed, plonking herself on a pew. "I don't know why we have to be here this early."
"Father Kosher told us to be here early," the dark-haired girl returned, joining her friend on the pew.
"We don't even know Entercock. Who is he?"
"A priest, apparently."
"Why do we have to be really friendly with him when we don't even know him?"
"I don't know any more than you. All we can do is wait and see what happens."
Frowning, Will crept into the office and opened the window. The Reverend Mother was a devious cow, he reflected, clambering through the window and falling to the ground. And as for Father Kosher, he mused, standing up and brushing grass off his cassock. The man was a snide bastard. Slipping into the undergrowth, he kept his eye on the main doors of the church. Guessing the girls were supposed to be overly friendly towards him so he'd be caught in a compromising situation, he checked his watch again. Fifteen minutes to go, he thought, wondering why he'd been such a fool. An anonymous phone call concerning two unsavoury girls? He shook his head. He'd been stupid.
Watching the girls wander out of the church, he had no idea what was going on. Checking their watches, they mumbled something to each other. Eyeing their naked thighs emerging from beneath their short skirts, he decided to take the bait. But not anywhere near the church. Coming up with an idea, he brushed his dark hair back and chuckled wickedly. They were bait, and he was going to eat the bait. Grinning, he emerged from the undergrowth and walked towards the delectable females.
"Good afternoon," he said. "And what delightful afternoon God has given us."
"Oh," the blonde gasped, turning and facing him. "You made me jump."
"Sorry."
"Is your name Entercock?" the dark-haired girl asked.
"Entercock?" he frowned. "Good God, no. You're not expecting that despicable man, are you?"
"Yes, we are. He's supposed to be here at two o'clock. Do you know him?"
"Know him? Good grief. I wouldn't hang around if I were you. The last man you want to meet is Entercock."
"Why's that?"
"He's... We can't talk here. He's the last person I want to bump in to. Follow me, and I'll explain."
"But, we're supposed to wait in the church," the blonde said. "He's a priest and... Hang on. You're a priest."
"I am indeed. I'm Father..." Father Shagnasty? "Er... Father Testiculus."
"That's an unusual name."
"I'm an unusual man, my child."
"We'd better wait in the church for Entercock."
"It's up to you," Will sighed, walking towards the trees. "You want to stay here and meet Entercock, then on your heads be it."
"Well, I suppose..."
As the girls followed Will along a path into the woods, he could almost smell their fresh cunny juice oozing from their little pink sex cracks. Lambs to the slaughter, he thought in his rising wickedness. They'd be tight, hot, wet... Calling him, the girls turned off the main path and headed into the undergrowth. Turning back, wondering where they were going, he followed them until they were a good two-hundred yards away from the church.
"This is far enough away from the church," the dark girl said. Watching the girls sit cross-legged on the soft grass, he sat between them and adjusted his tenting cassock as his penis stood to attention. Wondering which beauty to fuck first, he eyed the white material of their damp panties straining to contain their pussy lips. Once he'd ripped their panties off he'd sniff the crotches, breathe in the aphrodisiacal scent of girl-juice.
"Tell us about Entercock," the dark girl said, tugging her skirt over her thighs in an effort to conceal her panties.
"Where to begin?" Will chortled. "Before I start, what did father Kosher say to you? What were you supposed to do when Entercock arrived?"
"Be overly friendly towards him. I think it was some sort of trap."
"You've had a lucky escape, my child. Entercock is a sad and depraved sexual beast."
"Really?" the blonde grinned eagerly.
"He's a terrible man," Will continued, trying to drag his eyes away from the two pairs of tight panties. "He does terrible things."
"Go on," the blonde breathed, leaning forward. "What does he do, exactly?"
"Strips girls naked, runs his hands all over their beautiful bodies, strokes and caresses between their legs..."
"Sounds interesting," the dark girl murmured huskily. "I think we should go back and wait for him."
"You haven't heard the half of it," Will chuckled. "Two extremely pretty girls such as you... He'd eat you for breakfast."
"Eat us?" the blonde giggled.
"Every little bit of you. From your pretty heads, all the way down to your firm, ripe... From your chests, all the way down to your hot, wet, tight... Every little
bit of you."
"Sounds interesting."
"He does terrible things to girls with his... his penis."
"Such as?" the blonde beamed.
"Sounds very interesting."
"I couldn't tell you," Will said. "No, I can't say any more."
"Oh, please tell us," the dark girl whined.
"You might be shocked."
"We like being shocked."
"All right," Will conceded, his penis twitching beneath his cassock. "Entercock likes girls to suck his penis."
"Really?" they gasped in unison.
"I'm afraid so. He also... I'd have to show you."
"Show us what?" the blonde asked, cocking her head to one side.
"Show you what he does to their naked bodies. You'd have to strip off," he said, sure they would never do such a thing.
"Take all our clothes off?"
"Of course. I can't show you the things Entercock does unless you take all your clothes off."
"I suppose it'll be all right," the blonde said, facing her friend.
"I will if you will," the girl said softly.
"All right, we'll do it."
"Good, good. You've made a most un... A most wise decision, my children."
Standing, the girls didn't hesitate to pull their T-shirts over their heads and slip their short skirts down their shapely legs. This was rather easy, Will mused, gazing up at the beauties as they unhooked their straining bras. It was almost as if this was a trap. But, no. They were well away from the church and the Reverend Slagger. The posse would be lying in wait in or near the church, so he was safe enough in the woods. And let there be great doubt, he reflected. And there was great doubt.
He wouldn't have put anything past the Reverend Spunker. She, or one of her conspirators, could have followed him into the woods. They might be spying, lurking with a camera to take incriminating photographs. If only. He was going to have to play this very carefully, he knew as the girls peeled their bra cups away from their firm breasts. Watching as they slipped their thumbs between the tight elastic of their panties and their shapely hips, Will waited with bated breath.
"I don't think we should be doing this," the blonde murmured.
"Neither do I," her friend said.
"But... but..." Will stammered. So near and yet so far. "Girls, girls," he smiled.