Engaged: Surrendering the Future (Surrendering Time Book 3)

by Julie Arduini

  He leans back with pole in hand. “Sure. What’s going on?”

  I sigh. Lord, let this conversation go well. “Aiden Parker called me the other day.”

  Wayne leans forward. “Isn’t that the guy you worked with in New York?”

  I nod. “Seems they’re in transition where I used to work. The old management is gone and he’s been promoted to Project Manager. He’s really excited.”

  “Great. Is that why he called, to tell you about his job?”

  “Kind of. He wants me to be on his team. I guess there are new projects coming up that he feels I would be a perfect fit to work with him as his creative lead.”

  Wayne is on the edge of the chair, almost ready to tip it over. “That was nice of him to think of you. What did he say when you turned him down?”

  The air is still. Not even birds are responding to that question.

  I glance at him, his jawline, and his curls spilling out under the orange knitted hat. “He asked if I’d meet him for lunch to learn more.”

  Wayne’s eyebrows form a V.

  “It’s just a lunch in Binghamton. I didn’t see any harm in finding out what he has to say.”

  “Trish, why would you go and waste his time? You’re giving him false hope. He’s going to think he’s luring you into the job.”

  More silence as he works his jaw muscled through clenched teeth.

  “It sounds like there has been a lot of change and Aiden’s excited.”

  “From what I’m hearing, your friend isn’t the only one excited. Are you considering this? Why would you go all that way if you weren’t tempted to take the job?”

  My sigh turns into a frosty cloud that dissipates. “What Aiden described sounds like the job I thought I would have when I went to the city. That was a dream, but it became a nightmare. I think it’s worth hearing him out.”

  His tone sends a chill. “Not when you have no plans to go back.”

  “Do you want to go with me Monday so you can hear what he has to say?”

  He jerks the fishing pole out of the ice. “You’re going Monday?” He tosses the gear onto the ice next to the four-wheeler. “You said yes before talking to me?”

  The hair rises on the back of my neck. “I didn’t know I needed permission.”

  He stands and folds his chair. “I think it’s time to pack up.”

  “Wayne, I don’t understand. I’m only going for lunch and to listen. There’s no signed contract or moving truck or anything.”

  He faces me, arms folded against his chest. “I don’t think you get it. By meeting with this guy, you’re saying you are open to the idea. If you had no plans to leave Speculator Falls, you wouldn’t want to see what he has to say.”

  I shake my head and pack my things onto the back. “That’s your interpretation, not mine.”

  “It’s pretty straightforward. If you have no desire to leave the area, don’t go Monday.”

  Wayne starts the ATV, a relief so I don’t have to answer. The air remains still as we pack the gear and tie it onto the back. Holding on isn’t as dreamy as he seems to find every bump on the lake. By the time we reach his house, the silence is as thick as the ice we drove over.

  “I think I owe Aiden the chance to talk.”

  He digs his keys out of his pocket. “You’ve already heard him talk about the changes.”

  An impasse forms as Wayne struts to his front door and I march to my car. Hot tears threaten to form. “What happens if I go?”

  Wayne shrugs. “I’m not giving an ultimatum, Trish. You’ve worked hard to change your reputation. Remember how we met? Shirley harassed you for leaving town.”

  “But it’s not like that. I’m not leaving.”

  “If you go to that lunch, it sends a message.”

  I sigh and unlock my car before facing him. “You’re welcome to come with me. I wish you would.”

  He turns away to unlock his door and works on his door. I wait for his reply. It opens and he walks inside, closes the entrance behind him, and leaves me alone.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  The blinking light on my car charger doesn’t lie. My phone isn’t dead, but apparently communications with Wayne are. The longer I’m on Route 12 South, destination Binghamton, the harder the realization hits.

  My luncheon with Aiden could be the end of Wayne and me.

  I breathe slow and consider calling him. Fear of rejection and the memory of Wayne at church returning questions with one-word answers nix the idea. Turning the radio up is an option to drown out my thought, but no song can play loud enough.

  Lord, it’s You I need. I don’t think I’m wrong to hear what Aiden has to say. But Wayne’s upset and I’m scared. Help me.

  I return the volume to normal as if God’s going to speak out loud to me. The final forty-five minute drive reveals nothing but music. When I park at the restaurant and look for Aiden, my emotions bob and weave like a boxer in a prizefight. Aiden stands at the booth and waves.

  There’s no turning back.

  Aiden shakes my hand and helps me with my coat. “Trish, it’s great to see you. Did you have a good drive?”

  I run my hand through the back of my hair and sit across from him. “I did, thanks. I forget once I leave the mountains that we’re the only place with a lot of snow.” I pick up the menu. “So, how are you? You look, refreshed. Not stressed.”

  He nods, and a sandy blond strand of hair bounces. “It’s true. The new CEO has a completely different approach than anything I’ve ever seen. He wants employees to be visually stimulated and motivated. They bought property on Long Island. The plan is to have one campus with all employees there. Cubicles are gone. The new offices will be smaller, but Sam Cipher, the CEO, wants open spaces. Art throughout the interior. Comfy seating for meetings. Cafes. Walking paths. Tables outside with landscaping and ponds. I could go on and on.”

  That’s certainly not a corporate concept I’m used to.

  “You won’t be based in Manhattan?”

  Aiden shakes his head. “Crazy, right? I’ve seen the blueprints. It’s going to be amazing. Sam doesn’t even have an office in our current building. He wants to be accessible.”

  I rest my arms on the table. “Wow. A lot has changed.”

  We order, but after drinks arrive, Aiden stays on topic. “When clients come in for recruiting or training, my department creates all events while they are meeting with us. Orientations. Team-building exercises. Mixers. Goal celebrations. Whether it’s bagels in the morning or an all-out blowout, I’m in charge of it all.”

  These happenings are everything I thought I’d be doing when I accepted the job. “That’s fantastic. How big is your team?”

  His smile widens. “Twelve. Sam wants to expand it. I could have as many as twenty. We have twice the clients we did when you were there, with more potential business.”

  The more he talks, the more energy fills our booth. When our food arrives, it’s like a magnetic force surrounds us, making it impossible to ignore his excitement. And the opportunity that I could have it, too.

  After a few bites of his marinated chicken on the fresh baked submarine roll, he clears his throat. “Trish, I didn’t drive two and a half hours to tell you how great my life is. I have an immediate opening now, and I want you to take it.”

  My ice water goes down wrong and I cough hard enough that other patrons look over. “Sorry. Wrong pipe.” I wave my napkin before dabbing the edges of my mouth, then focus on Aiden. “What is it? On the phone you said something about partner?”

  He picks at a French fry. “That was my hope, but they want to wait a year for that. You would be on my team. Pitching ideas for different themed events. Writing purchase orders. Setting up. Picking folks up from airports. Creating team exercises. Some of it on your own, most of it with the rest of the group.”

  Okay, not partner. Still, a big improvement over what work they gave me last time I was in the city. “What’s the potential for advancement?”

&n
bsp; “As soon as I get the go-ahead for partner, I would want it to be you.”

  Is my breathing shallow? Are my hands perspiring? Is this excitement or a panic attack?

  “I appreciate your confidence. However, it took me a while to recover from being let go. I feel like I’m finally getting some career traction.”

  He glances at his phone. “Didn’t you e-mail me that you work at a department store?”

  “It’s my mom’s business. I help out. I meant the Greater Adirondack Chamber of Commerce. I’m trying to create a position there, and the feedback has been very positive.”

  “Let’s zero in on this. How much money are you making? Wait. Don’t answer that, I’m not supposed to ask, and, I need to show you something.” He reaches inside his coat and produces a pen. After a few scribbles on the napkin, he slides the paper to me. “Because this is what you’d start at.”

  My pulse races at the figure.

  Aiden crosses the numbers out and replaces them with a new amount. “This is what you’d make if you were my partner.”

  “I don’t know what to say.”

  He looks to his phone again and takes a drink of water. “Well, I do. Say yes. You wanted events planning, Trish. This is the job.”

  I fidget with the napkin. “When do you need an answer?”

  He chuckles, taking out his wallet. “I was hoping to have one before I drive back.”

  Now it’s my turn to laugh. “Aiden, I need time to think it over. I’m seeing someone, and it’s kind of serious. He has a son, and then there’s my mom and the store, and my portfolio…”

  Aiden places his credit card on top of the bill as the waitress picks them up. “I understand. Is a week long enough?”

  Ugh. I was hoping for two. Or a month. “Sure. Thanks for everything. I appreciate the offer, and that you drove all the way here.”

  “Same here. Looks like you have a lot to think about as you head back to snow country.”

  .***

  Four hours later, I’m back in Speculator Falls with a headache and cramped hands from gripping the steering wheel. Aiden’s words fill my mind and I can’t resist thinking about my future being on his team. Yet, after changing to jeans and a sweater and re-applying my makeup, I also want to see Wayne.

  I take a chance and drive to his house where his truck sits in the driveway and the lights are on in the living room. My heart feels like it’s pounding through my toes as I inch toward the front door. I ring the bell once and hear footsteps.

  His calming blue eyes nearly make me forget why I’m there. “Trish. Hey.”

  I try to smile but I feel so numb I wonder if this is what it feels like to get Botox. “Hi. Can I come in?”

  He swings the door open and gestures me to enter. “Do you want coffee? Cocoa?”

  “No, thanks. I want to talk. We promised early on we’d be honest with each other.”

  Wayne pales and reaches for the arm of his chair to steady himself. “We did. What’s going on? I take it you went to Binghamton.”

  I sit across from him on the couch, legs trembling. “Yeah. Aiden offered me a job. The company isn’t the same as when I worked there. They’ve made a lot of improvements, including their location. The vision they have is what I wanted all along. It’s in events planning and I would be part of a team.”

  His expression turns to granite.

  “The salary is a twenty percent raise from what I made when I worked there before, and obviously more than my current pay.”

  He draws in a deep breath and blows out a long sigh. “This is exactly what I thought would happen.”

  My eyebrows arch and my stomach clenches. “What do you mean?”

  “You said you wanted to go to hear him out. Now, you’re interested. I can see it in your eyes.”

  I narrow my gaze. “It’s a great opportunity and a blessing he wants me for it.”

  Wayne looks to the floor before focusing on me. “Is it enough to be asked?”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “Trish, did you leave that meeting with a boost of confidence, a redemption of sorts that gives you peace to pursue your future here? Or, did you drive home considering his offer?”

  His question sucks the air out of me. I close my eyes and shake my head. “I don’t know.”

  He moves to the couch, facing me. Our knees touch, and the electricity between us could light up the village. “I think you do.”

  “Maybe both. When I was let go, it killed my confidence. I was left with nothing. It felt good to hear I was needed. But, the position is everything I studied for, wanted. I’m torn.”

  There’s nothing but a clock tick for several moments.

  Wayne’s voice is soft, his tone, calm. Too calm. “I love you, Trish. I’m happy that someone sees in you what I always have.”

  I swallow hard. “But…”

  He slowly nods. “As much as I love you, I have to consider Noah. Before Aiden contacted you, we were planning a future that would unite the three of us. You were starting a career that would keep you local. Noah traveled with you to help because he wanted to get to know you better.”

  My lips quiver as tears form. “I know.”

  “You were spending time with him to see how you two got along, knowing the end goal was for you to be his step-mom.”

  Blinking only makes the tears fall faster. “I know.”

  Wayne stands and brushes the side of his hand against his cheek. “You’re allowed to be torn. I know you aren’t feeling this way on purpose to destroy us. But, we’re at a place that puts our future in question.”

  Bile rises up and I will it back down. Please don’t say what I think you’re going to say.

  “Trish, Noah doesn’t deserve to be hurt. If you aren’t absolutely positive about staying in town and creating a future with us, I have to protect him.”

  “What are you saying?”

  “I think we need to press pause on us until you make a decision about your future.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Jenna plants a caramel latte next to the department store register and takes a sip out of her travel cup. “Don’t worry, it’s caffeine free. Baby’s fine.” She pushes my drink closer to me. “But the question is, how are you?”

  I grip the protective sleeve. “You’re a good friend. Since Wayne told me we’re pressing pause, you’ve checked on me every day.”

  She narrows her gaze. “You didn’t answer my question.”

  Pregnancy only enhances her sass.

  “It’s been a few days and I volley back and forth with emotions. Confused. Sad. Angry. I don’t know what pause means. Are we done? Do we stop dating, but stay in touch? I don’t understand.”

  Jenna sips. “Have you tried to call? Text?”

  I glance at my phone on the other side of the register. “I start to, then chicken out. Everything feels out of sorts. That lunch was unofficial. I learned about the job, that Aiden wants me to have it, but there was no paperwork. I liked what he had to say. I’m interested, but it hasn’t been offered. Am I losing Wayne over nothing?”

  She sighs and picks up a souvenir pen, and taps it. “I think you need to reach out to Wayne and say that to him.”

  “You’re right. I need to explain what the job description is, the responsibility, and why I think it is important to my career. Make a list or something about the job.” I glance at the clock. “Do you have to get back to the senior center?”

  Jenna shakes her head. “I have some time. Shirley’s got it under control.”

  I reach under the counter and pull out a legal pad. “It’s not busy here. Want to help me create a list?”

  She looks around the store before returning her attention to me. “Can I grab the camp chair? My feet are a little swollen.”

  I jog over and pick up the folding seat, setting it up for her. “Can you write things down while I think out loud?”

  She waves the Adirondack pen. “On it. I’ve got a column marked what’s real, and wha
t’s a feeling.”

  I draw in a deep breath and slowly let the air out like a child with a balloon. “I feel like the job is a second chance at something I went to school for and thought I’d enjoy.”

  Jenna scribbles. “But, the reality is, nothing was officially offered to you.”

  I nod. “I feel like I could have the opportunity to join an established business as opposed to starting from scratch here with my proposal for the Greater Adirondack Chamber.” I take a drink from my lukewarm beverage. “I have Aiden’s support, but no idea about how his bosses feel. As far as the Chamber, Ed Sterling was impressed with me at Christmas, and I’ve built my portfolio since then. The truth is, I have a decent chance at receiving chamber approval.”

  She looks up from the legal pad. “The reality is New York City living wasn’t what you expected.”

  Images of the rat in my apartment come to mind, and there’s no way to make that glamourous. “And as much as I dreaded coming back, I finally find life in Speculator Falls charming. I enjoy living here.”

  Her pen scratching against the paper is the only sound for a moment. “Time to add Wayne to the list. The reality is you were making plans for the future. Serious enough that he wanted you to consider the role you would have as a step-mom.”

  Noah’s mess of curls comes to mind with that dimpled smile of his. “There’s no way I can be present in their lives if I’m in New York City.”

  Jenna tosses the writing utensils on the floor. “That’s your bottom line. Trish, how much do you love Wayne? If you can’t live without him, then the job offer, if it comes, isn’t worth it. If you don’t feel deeply committed to him and Noah, then that pause needs to change to a stop.”

  I bury my face in my hands for a moment. “You’re absolutely right. You’ve given me so much to pray about. Can I get a moon cookie for you as thanks?”

  She struggles with rising from the folded chair and standing, that cute belly of hers revealing her second trimester status. “No, I appreciate it though. It’s a blessing we can share. I look back to how we first met---not great friendship potential. I love what God’s done between us.” Jenna hobbles over and gives a quick hug.