To Be Your Girl (To Be Yours Book 1)

by Rae Kennedy

  “All we need is some potatoes to mash up with the parsnips, and pork chops, definitely.” He smiles at me, the sunlight just glinting off his thin lip ring. He only wears it occasionally, and I have never liked them on guys before, but it makes his full bottom lip look extra soft behind the metal. “Let’s go.”

  He guides me through the crowd with his hand lightly at the small of my back. The touch is just enough to be distracting.

  * * *

  I am mesmerized as I watch him in the kitchen that night, preparing our meal.

  Dinner is delicious, as usual. The savory pork chops are perfectly glazed with a fig reduction paired with the fresh apple chutney.

  “I guess it’s pretty easy to get laid when you cook like this.”

  “It is pretty easy for me to get laid, but I don’t cook for girls.”

  “You cook for me.”

  “That’s different. You’re Tuck’s sister. You’re like the one I never had to tease and annoy.”

  Awesome. Glad to know that’s how he thinks of me.

  “You’re not going out with your boyfriend tonight?”

  Oh right, Adam. “No, he’s out of town this weekend.”

  “Oh. If I’d known that I wouldn’t have made plans.”

  Really?

  He gets up and begins rinsing the dishes.

  “Got a hot date or something?”

  “I don’t date.”

  I grab a clean towel and start drying the plates. “No? Just pick up random chicks at the bar?”

  “I don’t pick up chicks either. They pick me up.”

  “Bullshit.”

  He shrugs. “The college girls just want one thing from me, and I’m happy to oblige.” He winks as he hands me the last fork to dry.

  * * *

  Thursday after class, Adam asks me if I’d like to go to dinner that evening. This is a break from our normal routine but I happily agree. I feel like we don’t get enough time together. I want more. More of him. Sweet, warm, beautiful Adam.

  I have a new dress for the occasion. It is tight and a deep crimson red. I match it with a rich shade of lipstick and nude pumps that make my legs look longer. I sweep my hair away from my face and fasten it in a low, loose side bun and leave my eye make-up bare—just some mascara on my long lashes that make my light brown eyes pop.

  As I walk to the door, I feel Cade’s eyes follow me from the kitchen. But I don’t say anything, and neither does he.

  At dinner, Adam tells me about his trip home the previous week. His younger sister won homecoming queen and he escorted her out to the football field before the announcement. She had been so excited. I imagine Adam at home with his family and it makes me happy.

  Afterward, he pulls up to my house but he doesn’t get out and open my door like usual. We sit there for a minute. Lingering.

  “You look stunning tonight.” His eyes dart down my body quickly, to my mouth then back up to my eyes. He licks his lips just enough to wet them. I know exactly what he wants. I want it too.

  I lean toward him and he doesn’t hesitate to kiss me. Eagerly. He smells delicious. His arms are wrapped around me instantly. His kisses are slow, getting deeper, harder, wetter. He wraps one hand behind my neck, holding me to him, while his other moves down to my hip, then further down to my bare thigh. He squeezes it with just enough force that I catch my breath.

  He inches up my thigh, scrunching my tight dress up in the process. My black lace panties are entirely exposed as he pushes my dress up to my hips. He is kissing down my neck, breath scorching my skin. My heart drums in my chest and my stomach flutters as he moves his hand up under my dress to rest on my bare stomach. He is practically panting as his fingers slide over the lace, down to where the heat is radiating out. My head rests against the cold window but I am only focused on him.

  Don’t stop.

  But he does.

  “Dammit. I’m sorry.” What is he talking about? “I don’t want to feel you up in my car, and I don’t want to push you. I want it to be special for you.”

  Doesn’t he see I do not care where we are? I just want it. Does he think I am a virgin too? Probably.

  “Don’t be sorry. I don’t mind. How about we go inside?”

  He pulls down my dress to cover me back up. “I really can’t tonight. I have a super early class tomorrow.” He looks positively distraught.

  Damn. “It’s okay. You have all weekend to make it up to me.”

  “About this weekend...”

  “What?”

  “I have a party tomorrow night at the house. It’s for a bunch of alumni. It’s this big deal, and well...only Greek members are allowed to come.”

  Oh.

  “I’m sorry. It will be boring anyway—you won’t be missing anything. I wouldn’t go if I didn’t have to.”

  I’m not good at hiding emotion. I know he can see my disappointment. He is going to a party and I’m not allowed to go?

  “Hey, I’ll make it up to you Saturday night, all right? I promise.”

  * * *

  Friday as I’m leaving sociology, I see a wild waving in my periphery.

  “Haley!” Court catches up to me, her ponytail bouncing, two guys following close behind. “Hey, I’m glad I caught you. This is my roommate, Caleb.”

  She points to the taller one. He gives me a nod but doesn’t smile. His black hair is shaved short and he has the most beautiful ebony skin I have ever seen.

  “And this is our friend, Jake.”

  Jake is a few inches shorter with wavy blond hair and a duffle bag thrown over his shoulder.

  “We are going to go play some volleyball at the Rec. You want to join?” Court asks, a hopeful smile on her face.

  I chuckle before I can think of a response. “I don’t think you want me playing with you. I have literally zero-percent athletic ability.” Tuck got all those genes.

  “Don’t be silly. We’d love you to come with us.”

  “Next time, promise.”

  Court nods, her big smile never leaving her face. “You’re coming to our Halloween party, right? It’s going to be so fun.”

  “I’ll be there.”

  Crap.

  * * *

  I’m looking forward to a quiet Friday night. I lay on the couch, rereading Persuasion. I had just dozed off around nine—I know, I know, I am really getting out of hand—when I am startled awake by the sounds of the door opening and loud laughing. A high-pitched, annoying female laugh.

  I sit up on the couch to see Cade walking in with hyena-girl stumbling in behind him. She is actually a very pretty brunette, but I can’t get over the piercing sound coming from her mouth.

  When Cade sees me sitting there he stops, his brows furrowed.

  “Isn’t it your date night with the boyfriend?”

  “He’s busy tonight.”

  Cade considers that for a moment, obviously still a little thrown. Does he want me to leave? Give him some privacy with his date?

  “Huh.” He seems to be saying it to himself. He turns to hyena-girl. “You can go home now.”

  She looks confused. Then mad.

  “Are you fucking serious?” Her speaking voice is just as abrasive. Cade nods nonchalantly and opens the front door. She stands there for a second, seething. Then she walks out without another word but the look on her face is like murder. What the fuck is this about?

  Cade walks over to the couch, not bothered a bit by the exchange, and plops down next to me.

  “Rather hang out with you, anyway.” He smiles so matter-of-factly at me I forgive him his rudeness immediately.

  “She was kind of awful.”

  “Right?” He agrees as he chuckles. “Let’s watch a movie.”

  “Okay.”

  “You go pick one and I’ll get the popcorn and drinks.”

  “Deal.”

  The movie is one of my favorites. I’ve seen it a dozen times. It is a bit slow, dryly humorous, and understatedly romantic. Cade hasn’t seen it before, but I
can tell he likes it. He is just so easy, laughing at all the right times, even catching the more subtle comments. Two beers and two-thirds of the way through the movie, I am barely able to keep my eyes open as I sway on the couch. Cade notices.

  “Tired?”

  “Duh.”

  He seems to like me stealing his line. He cracks into a wide grin and snatches a pillow. “Come lie down.” He places the pillow in his lap and motions me down. Right to his groin.

  Um, no.

  My hesitation makes him laugh harder.

  “Oh, just come on already.”

  He gently puts his hand on my shoulder. I remind myself how he thinks of me as a little sister and let him guide me down to lay my head in his lap. The pillow is soft and my body immediately relaxes all over. He pulls down the blanket from the back of the couch and throws it over me.

  He watches the movie as I close my eyes and drift languidly in and out of awareness. He bounces lightly under me when he laughs. I can smell the buttery popcorn and hear him take sips of his beer. His touch is soft as he brushes a strand of hair off my cheek, then I float away into sleep.

  When I wake up I am too warm. And cramped. My limbs are jammed under me and I feel stiff all over. Something heavy is across my side. I open my eyes.

  It’s Cade.

  He is lying next to me on the couch. His breathing is slow and deep, his arm is draped over my side and resting on my back.

  I watch him sleep. He looks peaceful. I study his features. His skin is smooth and unblemished. He has a cute little bump in his nose. His full lips go into a small pout and a crease forms between his brows like he is dreaming about something distressing. I want to touch that little crease, smooth it out, like the rest of his skin. Then maybe just touch that skin too, down his cheek to the edge of his jaw...

  The sudden clanking of keys at the front door alerts me. I slide out from under Cade’s arm without waking him and scuttle to my room before I hear Tuck step onto the entryway tile.

  CHAPTER 6

  Adam is beautiful. Shirtless. He is leaned over me, pulsing, sweating, breathing strained, irregular. His face is serious but loving. He looks at me, dark brown eyes the warmest I’ve ever seen. “I love you Haley.” Then he kisses me, his naked body coming down on mine, our wet skin rubbing together. Then I can just feel it, big and hard, moving inside me.

  The buzz of my phone knocks me awake. Rude. I reach under my pillow and answer in a croaky voice.

  “Hello?”

  “Morning, beautiful.”

  “Hey babe, what’s up?”

  “Did I wake you?” I look at the clock. It is just after ten. Wow. I never sleep in this late. I had left Cade on the couch at about five o’clock. Guess I didn’t get the best night’s sleep there.

  “Sorta.” Plus you interrupted a hot dream.

  “Sorry, I can call back later.”

  “No, I need to get up anyway.”

  “I missed you last night.”

  “Hmm...me too.” He really is the best.

  “Pick you up tonight at seven?”

  “Sure thing.”

  “Can’t wait.”

  * * *

  Adam is at my door at exactly seven—like always. But he doesn’t take me to a fancy restaurant. He drives up to a nice apartment complex. The three-story buildings are large and surrounded by mature trees. I realize I have never been to Adam’s place before. Is that weird? I am pleasantly surprised at a night in. He smiles a cute, slightly mischievous smile at me when he parks—like he knows something I don’t.

  He comes around, opening the door for me, and takes my hand and leads me up to the top floor of the farthest building. His hand always feels so nice wrapped around mine. I am suddenly nervous, but in the best way.

  When he opens the door, all the lights are off but there are several candles on the table, the countertops, the coffee table, lining the shelves. The soft flickering light reminds me of our first date at La Mer. The whole place smells faintly of vanilla. Adam brings me into the dining room and pulls me out a chair. He is ridiculously excited. He goes into the kitchen and comes back holding a massive tray with two plates, glasses, a bottle of wine, and a large covered dish in the middle. He lays it on the table and hands me a plate and silverware. Then he pours me a generous glass of merlot.

  “Beef stroganoff.” He unveils the covered dish and serves me a heaping portion of the pasta with some salad. “It’s sort of my specialty.”

  He is so proud of himself for this dish he made I don’t have the heart to tell him it isn’t that great. But hey, I have been pretty spoiled having Cade cook for me so often. His excitement is contagious. We talk about music and movies and school—and finish two bottles of wine.

  We’ve been done eating for well over an hour when Adam gets up and comes over to me. He takes my hand and pulls me up to him. Without any hesitation, he wraps his arms around me tight and kisses me. He is all solid pressed up against me. Heat encompasses me along with his delicious scent. The wine makes me a little dizzy as the kiss intensifies. His hands are firm against my low back and I can feel him against my stomach. He is hard. And large. Oh my. My insides turn to melting butter, sliding through me down to my toes. He tears away from my lips, his eyes hooded and glazed over.

  “Want me to show you around my place?”

  A one-room tour will work. “Sure.”

  He laces his fingers through mine and walks me around. Showing off the rooms with exaggerated enthusiasm.

  “And here’s the living room you’ve already seen”—using his hands to model next to the couch—“and then the kitchen. It’s small, but perfect for stroganoff-making.”

  The first doorway in the hall is a small bedroom. His roommate moved out last semester and he’d decided not to get another one. The next room is the bathroom, complete with washer and dryer across from the toilet. Classy. The next is his bedroom. He opens the door and leads me in.

  His bed is large and takes up most of the room. In the corner is a small desk and chair, piled high with books and a slim laptop. He has one lonely lamp in the corner. I can tell he had cleaned up for me. Nothing is on the freshly vacuumed floor, the bed is made, and it, too, smells like vanilla.

  “So, that’s the tour. Want to go back out to the living room? Watch a movie or something?” He is so sweet, standing here with me in his room. Tall and dark in his black sweater and dark wash jeans, not expecting anything from me.

  I shake my head, giving my best seductive smirk. I take the collar of his sweater and drag him toward me as I back up until the bed hits the back of my legs. He comes easily and finds my lips without protest.

  His lips never leave mine as we lay on the bed. They become greedier. He moves his hands down the sides of my ribs, leaving behind a trail of heat. He grabs the hem of my shirt and smoothly pulls it over my head. Then he sits up over me and pulls his sweater off. His chest is glistening and smooth and tan and Jesus Christ, shirtless Adam in real life is way better than dream Adam. His arm muscles are all hard and ripple-y as he lowers himself on me. My nipples harden, straining against my confining bra. His mouth is on mine, tongue filling mine eagerly, wet. His breath is ragged.

  “God, you’re so sexy,” he whispers.

  Then he kisses down my neck to my collarbone. Every time he comes up after a kiss, his breath hits my damp skin and sends chills through my whole body. He begins kissing and licking down my chest and between the swell of my breasts. I am covered in goosebumps. My heart is pounding.

  His warm fingers are on my stomach, sliding down to the button of my jeans. He undoes them smoothly and I lift my hips so he can pull them the rest of the way off. He tosses them on the floor then begins unzipping his jeans. I watch his large fingers slide the zipper down. His body is amazing, all toned and bulging. His pants are soon next to mine on the floor. Then he lies back down over me, kissing me hard.

  His pelvis is up away from mine and his hands are busy. Is he taking his boxers off?

  He
is.

  Okay, this is fast but I don’t want to stop. Then his hands are on my hips, he slides his forefinger just under the elastic of my thong and begins to pull them down to my thighs.

  Okay, apparently we are skipping second base altogether. That’s all right. I like third.

  With one hand, he continues pulling my underwear down while the other goes for his nightstand drawer. I hear the unmistakable crumple of a condom wrapper.

  Whoa. I am not there yet. I need more foreplay. Are we going all the way already? My throat feels like it is seizing up on me. I can’t get a full breath into my lungs. I feel lightheaded. This is too soon.

  “Adam...”

  “Yeah, babe.” He is at my neck, his kisses becoming messier.

  “I’m not sure...”

  “Just relax.”

  Relax? I am practically hyperventilating. I sit up and scoot away from him into the headboard.

  “No, I need to slow down. I’m not ready for this quite yet.”

  He is sitting there, naked. Gloriously naked. His cock sitting up between his legs is stiff, the tip dark red, stretched and shiny. He is ready.

  “Are you fucking kidding me?” His voice is harsh.

  I tear my eyes away from his erection at his abrupt words.

  His dark eyes bore into me, accusing. His mouth contorts. I have never seen him angry. “You pulled me on the bed with you! This was your idea!”

  “I know. I’m sorry—"

  “You’re such a fucking tease. You cunt.”

  “What?” I can’t believe he is saying this to me. I have never even heard him swear. His face is still twisted as he runs his hands violently through his dark hair. He is trying to calm himself down, but I am already off the bed grabbing my clothes.

  “Haley, I didn’t mean that—"

  “No! I’m leaving.” I pull on my jeans hastily, not even buttoning them. I throw my shirt on as I run down the hall. I can hear him behind me, tripping as he tries to dress. I grab my purse and shoes, fly out the front door, then slam it behind me.

  I run down the stairs. I am on the second flight when I hear him call for me.