Forget-Me-Nots in September

by Clare Revell

  “You think?”

  He nodded. “Definitely. That outfit with the flowers on you wore the other night was stunning. Made you look amazing.”

  “Amazing,” she repeated. “Is that the only descriptive word you know?”

  He tilted his head.

  “That’s about the fifth time you’ve used that word since we left home.”

  “That’s because I can’t think of another word to describe you. I want to get to know you better. Find out who the real you is.”

  “And when you find the real me doesn’t exist?”

  “Then I’ll have to be committed to an asylum because I’ve just spent the entire meal talking out loud to myself. I’ll go and get those sundaes.”

  She looked at him. “Unless you want me to be sick in the car, make it one sundae and two spoons.”

  He grinned. “That sounds quite romantic actually. Be right back.”

  ~*~

  Jude walked on the beach, the sand warm under her toes. Her shoes were in Bev’s rucksack. She wasn’t sure when he’d taken hold of her hand, but she wasn’t complaining. His skin was warm and only slightly calloused, but not uncomfortable. What would it be like to be held in his arms? Was he as strong and firm as he looked? Or were looks deceiving and he was as gentle as the forget-me-nots he’d brought her every evening when he’d come over?

  Bev squeezed her hand. “There goes the lifeboat.”

  She watched it bouncing on the water. “What would you normally be doing today?”

  “Usual stuff. Patrolling, reports, going to the service on the base. It’s a totally different world out there. A quiet Sunday or a day of rest just doesn’t happen.”

  The waves crashed onto the sand by her feet, dousing the tips of her toes in cold water. “I can’t imagine what it must be like.”

  “We can’t let our guard down for a moment, but then it is a war, no matter how the papers here term it. We’re out there to fight, not have a picnic. And you don’t want to imagine it. Some parts of my job are best not talked about. And of course some of it, I can’t talk about, not even to Gran.”

  She glanced at him. “Do you carry a gun?”

  “All the time,” he said. “Usually two. A rifle and hand gun. And a knife.”

  “Have you used it?” As he hesitated, she covered quickly. “Sorry, shouldn’t have asked.”

  “It’s part of the job,” he said quietly. “Along with stripping and cleaning it, knowing how to unjam it and so on.”

  “You ever think about doing something else?”

  “Some days. What about you?”

  She kicked the sand and then dipped her toes in the water. “Sometimes, yeah. Just sell up and vanish. I’m not sure anyone would miss me. I’m barely making enough of a profit for the shop to be worth all the hassle.”

  “What would you do instead?” he asked curiously.

  “I don’t know. Work as a barista somewhere. Or clean floors in an office block.”

  Bev laughed. “A cleaner?”

  “Yeah, there’s plenty of anonymity in that. Or I could be the person who collects the twenty pence pieces in the public loos on the station forecourt. After all, someone’s got to do it.”

  Bev turned her to face him. “Do you ever think about the future seriously?”

  “In what way?”

  His gaze searched hers. “Where do you see yourself in ten or twenty years’ time—other than a public loo on Kings Cross Station?”

  “I don’t think about that at all. Since Jayden was killed, I’ve learned firsthand how short and unpredictable life is. The only certainty is God and His love for me.”

  “I know that one,” he agreed. “But don’t you ever wish there was more to our lives on Earth. Like a spouse, children, a dog.”

  “Chesterfield would not like a dog in the house.”

  “Chesterfield?”

  “My cat. You didn’t see him the other night because he likes being outside.”

  “OK, forget the dog. I’m a cat man anyway.”

  Jude giggled. “Is that your superhero name? Should I try sending letters to Lt. Col. Catman?”

  Bev laughed. “Actually, Catman is my internet name, funnily enough.”

  “I’d like kids one day,” she said, tucking her hair behind her ears. “But who’ll want me?”

  Bev lifted his free hand and cupped her face. His touch was warm and sent shards of something she couldn’t name running through her. “You need to stop putting yourself down,” he told her firmly.

  “Everyone else does it.”

  “Not everyone. God doesn’t and neither do I.”

  “You?” Hesitancy filled her eyes.

  “Yes, me.” His fingers caressed her neck, catching in her hair. Then he pulled out her hairband, sending her dark locks cascading over her shoulders. “Wow.”

  “What?”

  “Your hair is amazing. It suits you like that.”

  Heat rose in her cheeks. His face was inches from hers. Would he kiss her? She had no idea how to kiss anyone. Her heart fluttered, her stomach clenched and an irrational bolt of fear charged through her. What if she messed it up? Just as his lips were about to touch hers, she turned her head. “What’s that?”

  Bev turned to look, once more taking her hand. “That’s a transport ship. They’re huge.” He pointed to the jet skis. “Now that is something I’ve always wanted to try.”

  “Then do it. There was a sign on the pier saying ‘hire me here.’”

  “Want a go?”

  She shook her head. “No, but I’ll happily sit and watch you.” Ten minutes later, she sat on the sand, his bag by her side, watching as Bev, now clad in a wet suit which left precious little to the imagination, climbed aboard the jet ski for a quick lesson. Then, he was gone.

  She opened the bag to pull out her bottle of water. A camera lay at the bottom. She picked it up and smiled. It was a decent one, zoom lens, state of the art SLR. She focused the lens, taking several shots of Bev as he rode the waves. Photography was a passion and had been since school where she’d learned how to develop the film. Not that anyone did that much anymore, but she’d always wanted a studio of her own.

  She put the camera down as Bev strode across the sand towards her. She realized she’d probably taken around a hundred pictures of him and the beach and surrounding dunes and cliffs. At least he could delete them off the card. She took one last one of him, eyes aglow and cheeks read. “Looks like you had fun.”

  “It was amazing.”

  “And there’s that word again. I might have to put a dictionary in your next box so you can learn some different ones.”

  “Seriously, it was great fun. You should try it.”

  “Nah.” She held up the camera. “I had fun here.”

  “Found the camera, then.”

  She nodded. “Took one or two…or maybe a hundred photos. You don’t mind, do you?”

  He shook his head. “I hardly ever use it. Can I have one of you?” He took the camera and laughed as Jude struck several poses for him. He took a couple and then took one of them together. “Let me go and change, and we’ll go get that ice-cream.”

  Jude nodded. “I’ll walk up with you as the shop is on the pier.”

  ~*~

  Bev took her hand as they walked through the quiet streets to the car. He wouldn’t mention the almost-kiss-that-wasn’t. Why’d she turned away at the last minute? Had he gone too fast? She obviously didn’t mind his company or him holding her hand. How had he misread the signs? He’d thought she’d wanted to kiss him, too.

  “Thank you for today,” Jude said. “It was fun. I really enjoyed it.”

  “So did I. I’m sorry the church didn’t have an evening service tonight.”

  “Me, too.” She smiled wryly. “If I had a decent phone I’d suggest we streamed the evening service from Headley Baptist on the way home, but it’s an old, “thick” model and all I can do is text and call. It doesn’t even take photos. Hence it being a thick ph
one rather than a smart one.”

  He laughed. “Well, if you don’t mind holding my phone on the way home, we can stream the service on that. I occasionally do it at work if I can get a signal and there is nothing happening.” He unlocked the car and frowned. “Are you all right?”

  Jude didn’t reply, just stared across the car park.

  Bev followed her gaze. “What’s wrong? Jude?”

  She shook her head. “Nothing.”

  He caught sight of a man standing on the other side of the parking area, beside a dark blue car, just watching them. “Is that him?”

  “I don’t know. Can we go?”

  Bev unlocked the car. “Get in. I’ll be right back.” He waited until she was inside. Then, he locked the car. He headed across the car park, intending to have a word, but the bloke got in his car and drove off, leaving rubber and smoke behind. Bev shook his head and went back over to his vehicle. He unlocked it and got in.

  Jude’s arms hugged her middle and she was pale and shaking.

  “He’s gone. You’re fine.” He put an arm around her shoulders and prayed for her and for them both. Then, he pulled out his phone and swiftly brought up the link for the church. “Here you go, just touch the links. Maybe you should text that DI you’re friends with as well.”

  “And tell her what?” Jude set his phone on her lap as she fastened her seatbelt. “That I think I saw him miles from home? It could have been anyone and he’s gone now.”

  “OK.” Bev started the car and began the long drive home. He kept watch as he drove, the service playing in the background. A dark blue car kept a short distance behind most of the way, changing lanes as he did. His battle instinct came to full alert. He knew enough to know when he was being hunted and right now he was. He couldn’t be sure it was the same car, but he wasn’t taking any chances.

  Accelerating, he hoped for the first time ever he’d be pulled over for speeding. If that failed, he’d pull off at the next junction and double back.

  7

  Bev knocked on the door, forget-me-nots in hand. It was five thirty in the morning and he’d promised Jude he’d drive her to work.

  Jude opened the door. “Good morning.” Her smile lit the grey day.

  “Hello. These are for you.”

  She took the flowers and grinned. “Does your gran have any left in her garden?”

  “Masses of them.” He took in a deep breath, the familiar aroma filling his nostrils. “Is that coffee I smell?”

  She chuckled. “Creature of habit, aren’t you? Mug of coffee freshly made on the work top for you.” She locked the door behind him and followed him down the hallway.

  “Did you call your friend when we got back?”

  “Yeah. She said to write everything down, keep a diary so to speak. I’m not sure that will do any good.”

  “It will be when they catch the bloke, trust me.” He picked up the mug and took a long swallow. He’d also reported being followed and the car in the car park the previous evening. “As the lads would say, ‘eee by gum ye make good coffee, girl.’” He watched Jude put the flowers in water. “I was talking to Gran about the house last night. She suggested it might be an idea to decorate and modernize this place.”

  Her face fell. “Oh. Is…is she thinking of selling?”

  Bev hesitated. Maybe he should tell her the truth behind her landlady or rather, landlord, but something held him back from doing so. “There are no plans to do so, no, but she suggested putting in a modern kitchen and bathroom and redecorate everything. I figured I’d go out today and buy paint and paper and organize the new cupboards and so on. I’m hoping to do most of the papering and painting while I’m on leave.”

  “I can decorate,” she said quietly. “Dad taught me. Actually he’s a kitchen fitter so if you wanted…”

  “You can help,” he told her. “And if you’ve got his number, I’ll give him a call.”

  He took the card she offered and finished his coffee. “So I’ll come back here after I’ve dropped you off and measure up and so on. Ready to go?”

  “Yeah.” Jude remained silent in the car and barely said goodbye as he dropped her off.

  Bev went back to the house. He let himself in with the spare keys and spent a couple of hours measuring each room and working out how much paper he’d need. He also wanted to replace the carpets. He knew exactly what he wanted to do to the house, but he’d give Jude a say over the colors. There was no point painting something green if she hated green, and she did live here after all. It may be his house, but until he actually left the army, there was no point in him choosing the décor.

  He locked up and headed back home. He hung up his jacket and went through to the kitchen to find Gran. As always, she was up to her elbows in flour, making cakes and bread.

  “How did she take it?” Gran asked.

  Bev rolled his eyes. “She wasn’t happy. She asked if you’re planning on selling it.”

  “Didn’t you tell her you’re the real owner?”

  “No, it didn’t seem right. Besides, I’m not planning on selling it, you know that. She gave me this.” He handed over the card. “Her father fits kitchens for a living by all accounts.”

  “Thank you. Do you want me to give him a call now?”

  “Please.” Bev nodded. “I’ll go for a run. Be about an hour or so.”

  Gran smiled. “OK, dear. Take your keys because I have my art class this morning and need the car.”

  He grinned. Gran had taken up art after Gramps died, and she’d discovered a talent for it. Several of her pictures hung on the walls, including his favorite of a kingfisher. He kissed her cheek. “Have fun. See you later.”

  ~*~

  Jude glared at the paperwork. The figures were once again mocking her. She was making stupid mistake after stupid mistake because her mind was elsewhere. Modernizing the house could mean only one thing. Mrs. Bowen would be selling Jude’s home from under her. Or increase the rent to cover the renovations. Or both.

  Yes, the place desperately needed it. The bathroom, though functional, was pre-war with the cistern half way up the wall. The heating was plug in oil filled heaters or a gas fire in the lounge. The kitchen had a free standing gas stove and a stone sink in the corner. But she loved it.

  There was no way she could afford a rent raise. Or a mortgage. Every spare penny she had went back into the bakery. Is this Your way of telling me it’s time to move on, Lord? Sell the shop and go and do something else with my life?

  Kate tapped on the door. “I’m off, Jude. See you tomorrow.”

  Jude nodded. “I’ll be here. Is everything off?”

  “Yup. Night.”

  “Night.” Jude looked back down at the book, forcing her mind to concentrate. She managed for about ten seconds before she heard Bev’s voice in the shop. She pushed upright and went to the doorway. “Hello. I wasn’t expecting you just yet.”

  “I’m early, yes, but I need to take you shopping.”

  Jude tilted her head. “For…”

  “Paint and paper,” he said, a smile crossing his face. “You ought to get some say in what color I decorate the house as you live there.”

  For now. “I can’t tonight. There’s too much to do here. The paperwork is mounting up.”

  “Oh.” Disappointment crossed his face. “OK. Ummm, well what colors should I avoid?”

  “I like most stuff, but don’t really want the bedroom dark red.”

  “OK. I want to start tomorrow with the lounge. We’ve arranged for your dad to give us a quote for the kitchen, so he’ll be up tomorrow at some point to do that as well. And Elliott Wallac from church will come and give us a quote for the bathroom and heating.” He paused. “Are you sure you don’t want to come with me?”

  She nodded.

  Bev took her hand. “What’s wrong? You look so sad. Almost as if your heart is breaking, and I can’t have that.”

  “I can’t afford a rent increase,” she said honestly. There wasn’t any point
in sugar coating it, or avoiding the issue. “Your gran is about to pour thousands of pounds into the house, and I know it needs it and has done for a long time, along with heating. She’ll either want to sell the place or hike the rent to recoup the money. I can’t afford either, so, no. Thank you for the offer, but I don’t want to go and chose the décor for a house that won’t be my home for much longer.”

  Bev’s face was a picture as conflicting emotions covered it in a rapid succession. “Now, hold on a moment. Even if Gran did want to sell, which I know for a fact she doesn’t, then how do you know the new owner wouldn’t allow the sitting tenant to stay?”

  “Would you if it were your house?”

  He hesitated before answering. “If I were still in the army, then yes. It depends where I was based, but being the unit CO and single, it’s far easier to live on the base. Besides which, I can be deployed for up to nine months at a time. That’s a long time to leave a house sitting empty. So please, come with me?”

  She sighed. She wanted to spend the time with him, but the accounts needed doing. “I can’t. I have a pile of work to do before I can leave.”

  “Then how about I pick you up on my way home and we’ll have pizza delivered. It’ll save you walking and cooking.”

  She smiled. “That would be good, thank you.” She saw him out and deadlocked the door behind him. Flicking off the lights, she headed back into the office, leaving the door ajar so she’d see him when he came back.

  ~*~

  Bev loaded the rolls of paper and tins of paint into the car. He hoped Jude would like the ones he’d picked. Blue for the bathroom, green for the kitchen, yellow, pink, and lilac for the bedrooms and cream for the lounge; along with a very pale coffee for the hall, landing and stairs. He’d even picked up suggestions for flooring and would insist she at least chose that. It’d most likely need changing ten years down the line anyway.

  He drove towards the bakery, debating whether or not to order the pizza when he parked, so it’d be delivered shortly after they arrived back at the house. That was probably the best idea. He knew what Jude liked as they’d had pizza before so if he got two individual ones, they could have half of each one.