Crossroads

by Mary Ting

  At that moment, I realized how much they cared for me. Maybe it was knowing that we might never see each other again. Whatever the reason, I knew they would miss me too, although maybe not as much as I would miss them.

  They turned their backs to Michael and me to give us some privacy. As Michael came toward me, Alexa Rose unexpectedly rushed past him to give me a most heartfelt hug. She smiled warmly with her beautiful blue eyes, then ran toward Vivian. It was the first time she displayed any affection toward me. Surprised by Alexa Rose’s action, Michael let out a huge grin. We locked eyes as he approached me. Then he gently guided both of my hands to his chest. I imagined putting my handprint on his heart and thinking, mine, forever. His look was worth a thousand words, and I knew exactly how he felt. I was afraid to let go for fear that I may never see him again.

  “I’ll be back. This isn’t good-bye,” Michael said, trying to sound cheerful.

  Desperately holding back the tears, I nodded. I believed him. He then cupped my face and gave me a sweet tender kiss on my forehead. “My heart and soul are where you are. I am here,” he spoke again, gently touching the crystal necklace.

  All choked up and unable to say a word; I took a deep breath and nodded. I watched them disappear into the moonlight as I heard, from a distance, Caleb and Davin arguing over who was going to drive the Ferrari back to the dealer.

  All the lights were off, and Mom was still at work. It was peaceful and late into the night. As I lay in bed, I tried not to think about the “what ifs” that could have happened at the Grand View Hotel. It was still hard to grasp the fact that Aden was really dead, but knowing that he was, I felt relief beyond words. At the same time, I worried that since I was out of danger, Michael and the alkins would not be coming to see me anymore. I was also worried about Michael. I knew he would be fine, but until I saw him whole again, I would worry. My eyes were getting heavier, and I couldn’t control it any longer. “Good night, my guardian angel,” I whispered as I dozed off to sleep.

  Chapter 23

  I was glad it was Veterans’ weekend. Not only did we have a day off from school, but we had also prearranged a day off at Fashion Wear. Patty planned a hiking trip with some of our friends. As much as I disliked hiking, I had to make it up to her. Going hiking again was the only way to do that. She used my guilt as an opportunity to get me to do anything she wanted. I was pleased to do it.

  I also promised Mom that I would help her pack Gamma’s belongings this morning. I wasn’t looking forward to it, knowing that it would make me emotional, but I needed to be there for her.

  “Are you ready, honey?”

  “I’ll be right out, Mom,” I said, mentally preparing myself, knowing how I would react at Gamma’s house. I knew one thing for sure; I had to be strong for Mom.

  “My car or yours?” I asked cheerfully, stepping out of my room.

  “Why don’t we both take our cars so you can just leave from Gamma’s to meet up with Patty?”

  “Okay, that sounds fine. I’ll see you there.”

  After starting the engine, I noticed the bracelet Gamma had given me for my birthday. I smiled, recalling that day when she slipped one on my wrist and told me to put the other in the car. The smile quickly disappeared, and was replaced by grief at the thought of never being able to see her again. My body cringed from the heartache, and I forced myself to try to feel nothing. Since it would be my first time at her house since her passing, feeling numbness would be the only way I would make it through packing without falling apart.

  It was a short ride, so I just waited in the car for my mom. I must have sped. I thought Mom would give me few words for speeding, but instead, she put her arm around my shoulders and we walked inside Gamma’s house together. All was still. It felt strange to be inside the house without her. We both looked around the living room with aches in our hearts. Nothing was out of place. It was as if she was stilling living here, but the silence was a sure sign of her absence.

  “I just need your help packing a few boxes, honey. I don’t intend to pack everything in one day,” she said, with tears in her eyes.

  Seeing her eyes water up like that was just enough to make me almost lose it. I turned my head, trying to avoid eye contact. Don’t look at her, and keep your thoughts on happy thoughts, I said to myself. My fist curled into a tight ball as I held my breath, desperately trying to control my emotions, trying to feel as little as possible.

  As we both walked into her bedroom, the first thing I noticed was her bed, untouched. Besides the bed, her room was furnished with a mahogany dresser and a nightstand. It wasn’t like I had never seen her bedroom before, but today I noted every little detail of her room. The room that used to make me feel warm and inviting now felt empty and cold.

  “Honey, could you pack her stuff from the closet?” Mom asked finally.

  “Sure, Mom,” I said and took the box from her hand.

  “I’m going to pack up in the other room,” she said quietly, as one teardrop fell.

  Hesitantly, I opened the closet door. Her clothes were hung neatly, organized by color. As I scanned through her clothes, a white cashmere sweater caught my eyes. I gently loosened the sweater off the hanger and held it close to my face. I could smell the sweetness of her favorite perfume. I imagined hugging her as if she was right here. Standing here, thoughts of Gamma and the happy times we’d had together danced in my head. She had made me feel like I was the most special person in the world. I could do no wrong in her eyes.

  Guilt started to race through my mind as I was thinking that I should have visited her more often. Tears fell to the floor and I reached down to wipe them up as more found their way down my cheek. As I started to stand up, I noticed something behind the jackets. Sliding the hangers slightly to the left, I saw a small shelf. Curious, I picked up a small, wooden treasure box that was on top. A part of me thought I shouldn’t open it because it was her private possession, but curiosity got the best of me. First, I looked behind me to see if Mom was in the room. Then I slowly opened the treasure box, like a little girl sneaking a peek at her hidden Christmas present.

  Inside were a few letters, pictures, and a journal. I thumbed through the pictures of Gamma and me, and Gamma with Mom. I gently tucked the pictures back to pick up what looked like a journal, hoping to find some answers to my questions. I glimpsed through the journal and read a few pages about me. I knew that she cared about me and loved me like her own, but reading it was harder to take, and my eyes filled with tears again.

  Focusing on why I was here in the first place, I pulled her clothes off the hangers, folded them, and neatly stacked them inside a box. After I finished my task, I sat down and placed my head between my knees trying to get a grip on all this. When I looked up, I noticed an envelope tucked inside her favorite blue jacket. It was addressed to me. Find my letter; Gamma’s words suddenly came back to me. I was so furious at myself. How could I have forgotten? I knew it was from Gamma, so I tore it open, feeling excited and anxious.

  Dearest Claudia,

  If you are reading this letter, it means that I am too weak to speak or I have already passed on. I’m so sorry that I couldn’t tell you sooner, but it was for your own protection. I wrote this letter just in case I didn’t get a chance to tell you everything that you should know. Many things I’m about to tell you will be very difficult to believe, but I’m telling you the truth, and you must believe me.

  God’s first angels make up the Royal Council. They are the ones who make the decisions for humanity. The Royal Council is special because, not only are they powerful, they have the souls of the Holy Spirit. Your father was one of the Royal Council. I know this because your mother told me that she fell in love with an angel, one of God’s first angels. She also told me that she had a visit from another angel. He told her that when the time was right, he would come for you, the child with the soul of the Holy Spirit. And because of this, I told her about me. I knew both of you were in danger because the angel that visited your mot
her was a fallen angel named Aden.

  I had to make a decision; either to report you to the Royal Council or to protect you. Your mother begged me not to tell the Royal Council because you would be taken from her, so I couldn’t refuse. I loved her as if she was my daughter, and I let my human emotions take me over.

  Aden was one of the Twelve Angels. These Twelve Angels helped the Earth angels to guide the humans. But he rebelled. He wanted to create an army to fight the Royal Council. His soul was taken away, and his powers were weakened. He knew that the only possible way for him to enter the holy realms was by taking the Holy Spirit’s soul. This would allow him to enter Halo City and regain his powers back to full strength. And because of this, he was after your soul.

  Your mom and I hid from Aden as long as we could, but somehow he found us again right before you turned one. I would have been able to save both of you, but he had someone helping him; her name was Julia. Your mother tricked Aden and Julia. She led them to follow her while I ran away with you. I’m so sorry that I couldn’t save your mother.

  Later, Ava Emerson adopted you, and it wasn’t by chance. I purposely made that happen because I knew in my heart that she would make a great mother for you. Unfortunately I had to instill in her mind that her husband had died in a freak car accident. I wanted to make sure that she wouldn’t remarry so that all her energy would be on you. I know it sounds horrible for me to have done this to her, but you have to understand that everything I did was for your protection.

  You see, honey, the only way for Aden to get the Holy Spirit’s soul is if one who carries it gives it willingly. You will never be fully in danger from Aden because he can’t kill you to get what he wants, but he can hurt the ones you love.

  My powers were strong once; but now that I’m old, they have weakened, and I won’t be able to fight him. Since I wouldn’t help him by convincing you to give up your soul willingly, he has taken my life. Don’t worry. I knew this time would come sooner or later, but it was my honor to watch over you. Because I knew I couldn’t be with you forever, I’ve asked someone else to watch over you. You must be strong. Don’t ever let him have your soul, even it means he will hurt the ones you love. You must not, or humanity will be lost forever.

  I know this is a lot to take in, but I believe in you. You are strong, just like your mother. I know you are sad that I have passed on. I know you will miss me, but not as much as I will miss you. Some humans believe a myth that when they pass away, their souls become a star. Though I am not human, look for me up in the sky and know that you are not alone.

  As I have mentioned before, you cannot fight destiny; humans search for the meaning of life when it’s right in front of them. Everybody has a purpose, even Earth angels. We all need to live as we do, and our purpose will unfold naturally. Then it will be our time to pass on when it has been fulfilled. Be strong. Move forward and live your human life to the fullest, responsibly. I will miss you. I loved you as my own.

  Exhaling and sitting there motionless, I took in Gamma’s words. I was practically holding my breath the whole time. I couldn’t believe what I was reading; had it been the first time learning about the existence of Earth angels, the Twelve, the Royal Council, and the soul of the Holy Spirit, I would have flipped. But the news didn’t strike me hard because Phillip had already explained it all to me.

  Regardless, she had just revealed everything I needed to know about my life. Tears rolled down my face. They were tears of frustration, tears of sadness, tears of anger, and tears of hope. I felt completely worn out. I didn’t want to believe it, but the truth was written in her letter. Michael was right. Aden knew about me before I was born. He was waiting for this opportunity for 18 years. He was waiting for a member of the Royal Council to make a mistake. And who did Gamma ask to watch over me? It didn’t matter. Aden was dead. I had my guardian angel, and he was all that mattered to me.

  Startled by Mom’s voice, I broke out of my thoughts. “Claudia, are you ready?”

  “I’ll be right out, Mom,” I replied.

  “Claudia,” she called again.

  I quickly placed the rest of Gamma’s belongings in the box and placed the letter in my pocket. “Almost done, Mom.” I was so distracted that I hadn’t noticed leaving some things out. Just in the nick of time, I was done. Mom came through the door. I could tell she had been crying. Avoiding eye contact, she took the box from me. “Thanks, honey. I know this was hard for you too.”

  I placed my arms around her, and suddenly she lost control. Although my eyes were glossy, I had no tears to shed. My heart was aching not for Gamma this time, but for my mom. Knowing the life she could have had was taken from her made me feel extremely guilty. The husband and the children she could have had were gone, all because of me. When she finally got control of herself and her tears subsided, she slowly let go. We were interrupted by a soft knock at the door.

  I quickly wiped away the evidence that my eyes were watery. When I opened the door, I was surprised to see Patty. I was sure I had asked her to meet me at church, but maybe I read the text wrong. Nevertheless, I was overjoyed to see her.

  “Hello, Mrs. Emerson,” Patty said politely.

  Before Mom could say anything, I grabbed Patty and squeezed her so tightly that she lost her breath. It had been a while since I last saw her, and even though we texted every day, it wasn’t the same. I was so happy to see her.

  “Hello, Patty. It’s good to see you again,” Mom said, giving her a hug after I let go. “Someone missed you tremendously.”

  “Yeah, I have that kind of effect on her. Too bad I don’t have the same effect on the guys,” she said, laughing.

  “Well, I’m just glad she has someone else to comfort her, besides me,” Mom said to Patty.

  “I’m so sorry for your loss,” Patty said to Mom. Her tone changed from playful to serious.

  “Thank you,” she said.

  As Patty and Mom were talking, I quickly walked out the door so Mom would get the hint that I wanted to leave.

  “You girls be safe now. Don’t come home too late,” she said, smiling. “Is Davin going?”

  “Who?” I asked. I practically choked. She had met Davin on the night of Ryan’s birthday party. I didn’t tell Patty any details about the party, only that I was going with Kristina and Maggie.

  “How many Davin do you know?” Mom asked jokingly. “The friend who picked you up for Ryan’s birthday party,” she reminded me.

  “Mom, no, no.” I shook my head. “He’s just a friend. He’s not coming.”

  “Oh,” she said, looking disappointed. “Too bad. He’s pretty cute.”

  “Who’s Davin?” Patty asked, unlocking the door to her car. Patty had gotten a used car like mine, only hers was silver.

  “Just a friend,” I said quickly, like it was no big deal. I opened the door and sat inside.

  “Another guy? Who else is there?” she asked, raising a brow.

  I could tell she was disappointed that I didn’t tell her all about him. Since I didn’t respond to her question, she didn’t pursue the topic any further. Not drilling me with a whole bunch of questions was odd, and I wondered what she was up to.

  “You okay?” Patty asked, gluing her eyes to the road.

  “Yeah, I had to pack some of Gamma’s things, and it was pretty hard on both of us. And, I…umm…” How could I ever explain to her that Gamma was an Earth angel?

  Patty interrupted me as I continued to search for the right words. “I understand. You’ve been through a lot. But I just want you to know that you can tell me anything. I’m here for you.” She placed her hand over mine.

  “I know. You’re my best friend,” I said sincerely.

  “Good, because, don’t get mad,” Patty said.

  “What did you do now?” I asked softly with a frown. Knowing Patty, she had something up her sleeve, which was usually meant to do something nice for me.

  “Well, I told you that there was a bunch of us going hiking…” She hesitated
to say anything else and started twisting a strand of her hair with her left hand. She looked nervous.

  “And?” I asked, wanting more explanations.

  “Well, there’s only going to be the four of us.”

  “Oh, that’s fine,” I said. “Who’s going?” I was thinking that she was going to name some girls, but then I got a feeling that wasn’t it, since she was acting weird again.

  “You, me, Andrew and his friend,” she spoke quickly.

  “Who is his friend?” I asked, knowing she knew that I knew only one of Andrew’s friends.

  “Austin,” she said quickly with a worried look. “I didn’t think you would mind…you see…other people backed out. I swear, Claudia. There were supposed to be more people.”

  “Since you didn’t do it on purpose, that’s fine. I’ll be fine with it. He’s a little annoying, but I have no choice. It’s too late to make you take me back home.”

  “What do you mean annoying?” she asked, looking offended. “He’s not annoying. He’s cute, and I think he’s interested in you,” Patty said enthusiastically.

  “I didn’t mean annoying,” I said in a casual tone of voice, thinking I should pick my words carefully. “I don’t want him to be interested in me.”

  “He’s been asking about you.” She smiled, ignoring what I had just said.

  “Oh,” I said. Great! Now it was going to feel like a double date. I would just have to be polite and endure today. “Does he know that there will be only four of us hiking?”

  “I’m sure Andrew told him.”

  “I just don’t want to give him the wrong idea,” I said firmly so she would understand my point.

  “Sure, don’t worry. I’ll make sure of it, but you two would make the perfect…”

  I motioned my hand up. I knew what she was about to say, so I stopped her and quickly changed the subject. “So, what’s going on between you and Andrew?”

  Grinning from ear to ear, she said excitedly, “We’re dating.”

  I’d never seen her so happy. I hoped things would work out for both of them, because finding your true love happened once in a lifetime if you were lucky. Two hours passed by quickly. We spent so much time catching up that, before I knew it, we were already at our destination.