Sweet Wild of Mine

by Laurel Kerr

  He brushed his hand down her back, feeling the delicate curve of her spine. “For what, lass?”

  She gave him a saucy wink. “For this.”

  Then that bonny pink mouth closed around his prick. He moaned aloud. His eyes threatened to roll back in his head, but he did not let them. He’d dreamed about making love to June for too long not to watch. She kept her eyes trained on his, her boldness nearly driving him mad. Lust darkened her irises, and they shone like gems. Without a trace of self-consciousness, she did not break their gaze as she licked and teased him. His hands fisted into her soft, blond hair, and despite the mad want coursing through him, he made sure to keep his grip light and gentle.

  Och, the lass was going to slay him with her mouth. When he could no longer withstand it, he allowed his eyelids to drift close.

  “Lass,” he said between gritted teeth.

  “Yes, darlin’?”

  “Would you like to ride?”

  She laughed then. The sound was bright, and triumphant peace stole through him. After all she’d been through the last few days, he’d managed to coax a little mirth from her.

  “Why, yes! I think I would.”

  He lifted her, settling her on him. She gasped and then wiggled. He forced his eyes open. A slow smile drifted across his face as he watched her adjust to his girth. She moved experimentally at first and then faster. He placed his hands on her hips, feeling the soft swell of her bum as she guided them both into oblivion. It was frighteningly easy…surrendering to this lass.

  Afterward they snuggled together, both breathing heavily. She curled into him, fitting perfectly as he draped his arm over her side. It was strange, lying so close to another human and not feeling trapped. Instead, a peace slipped through Magnus.

  Sleep claimed the lass, but he remained awake. He carefully lifted his head to check on her. June even slept with a slight smile on her face. At the sight, Magnus couldn’t help but grin. Even in the midst of her sorrow, she exuded a lightness that the darkness inside him craved.

  He reached over and flicked off the light. As he settled back down, June nestled close. When her body slid into place, she sighed deeply in her sleep.

  “Caidil gu là,” he whispered softly.

  He still didn’t drift off immediately. Instead, he lay thinking about the trust in the lass’s embrace. Even though he’d revealed more of himself to June than he’d ever shown to any woman, he’d still held back. But June hadn’t. Not in the slightest. She possessed such an open heart. But he never would. Something was broken inside him that would never be fixed. Reclusiveness ran in his da’s family, and Magnus had taught himself never to need another.

  He just hoped he didn’t hurt June. He wouldn’t want to dampen the light that made her unique.

  Chapter 11

  The days blended together as June practically lived at the hospital over the next week. Katie had driven up despite June’s protests. She had, at least, listened to June and hadn’t entered the hospital. Instead, the two of them had eaten lunch. It had been one of June’s few escapes from the endless waiting and worrying.

  Their other best friend from college, Josh, had called from San Francisco several times. He’d offered to fly out but decided to wait until her folks left and she needed more help. She’d told him it wasn’t necessary, but Josh had reminded her that Katie and she were the only family he’d ever had. If there was a crisis, he’d be there. And, he’d pointed out, Nan had always baked his favorite pie when he was in town.

  With August deployed, he couldn’t come, but he’d promised to head to Sagebrush the next time he had any leave. June had tried to place her laptop on Nan’s hospital tray so her gran could video chat with August, but that had only frightened the elderly woman. She’d glanced at June, her hazel eyes wide with confusion, as she’d asked if it was a bomb and did June know how to defuse it?

  Her grandmother had become combative with the nurses and swore they meant to kill her. She calmed slightly with family members in the room, so June and her parents had taken rotating shifts. June felt as worn down as an old grinding stone, the friction chipping away at her little by little.

  What made it all bearable was Magnus. He’d become a surprisingly constant presence. Although he’d driven back to Sagebrush a few times to help Bowie and to temporarily close up the tea shop, he’d always returned. Today, he’d brought her videos of little Savannah and Sorcha along with more of her clothes.

  June was lying next to Magnus on the hotel bed, her head resting on his shoulder. Using his free hand, Magnus swiped his phone to pull up a clip of the little camel. Despite the sorrow clinging to June, she found herself laughing as the calf tried to suckle the phone. Gums, lips, and one giant brown eye filled the screen. First came sucking sounds and then frustrated grunts of disappointment.

  “She has her mum’s brains,” Magnus said, and June lightly bumped him on his shoulder.

  “That’s not nice, darlin’,” she scolded. Unconcerned, Magnus shrugged and selected another video.

  In this one, Abby appeared first. She held the phone with one hand as she waved with the other. Her voice was bright and filled with the endless energy of youth. “Hi, June! Sorry to hear about your nana. Sorcha and I miss both of you. So does Savannah.”

  “The lassie insisted on sending you a m-m-message,” Magnus explained as he paused the clip. “She’s got a soft heart.”

  “She takes after her father,” June said.

  “Aye. He’s a good man.”

  Magnus restarted the recording, and Abby’s voice again filled the hotel room. “You have to see what Sorcha’s doing now.” The camera panned the zoo’s nursery, and the little bear crawled to the camera, her movements steadier and more confident than before. She batted the cell phone with her paw. Her black pad covered the screen, and then her nose appeared. At the sound of Sorcha’s snuffles, June chuckled again.

  “She’s as curious as a cat after a bird,” June said.

  “Aye,” Magnus agreed. “We’re p-p-planning on introducing her to Frida soon. There’s a risk, and she’s just a peedie thing, so Bowie is only going to let Frida smell and see her. Since the grizzly tolerates the honey badgers, he’s hoping she’ll take to Sorcha. The wee beastie needs the companionship of other b-bears.”

  “Will you tape the meeting for your vlog?”

  “Aye, lass. I was hoping we could record the audio t-together, even if we have to do it here at the hotel. Katie said she could layer my voice over the video.”

  It struck June then that Magnus would have had very little time to do his vlog in the past week. Plus, she hadn’t been there to help him. “Heavens to Betsy, I just realized I haven’t thought about your videos for days. Did you record one this week?”

  “I asked Bowie to guest star for m-me,” Magnus said.

  “I’m sorry I haven’t been able to help.”

  “Don’t fash yourself. I told my agent and editor it was a family emergency. Since I don’t have any myself, I thought it was a fine time to use that excuse.”

  June turned toward him in surprise. Even though they currently shared a hotel room and had begun sleeping together on a regular basis, she realized she knew very little about Magnus aside from what she’d read in his writings. Despite being first-person accounts, his memoirs actually revealed very few details about his life outside of his interaction with the animals and the environment.

  “Have you cut all ties with your daddy then?” June asked. Although she believed in families sticking together, in this case it might be best if Magnus didn’t have contact with his father.

  Magnus stared ahead, studying one of the innocuous but inoffensive prints that hotels hung in guest rooms.

  “M-my d-d-da made it clear that I was as good as d-d-d-d-dead to him if I left the croft. As you can see, I left.”

  Magnus spoke the words without any feeling, but h
is stutter had noticeably worsened. June reached for him, almost expecting to find his skin as cold as his words. It wasn’t, but he didn’t turn at the contact either. There was a hollowness in him, and in this moment, it threatened to swallow June too. She didn’t like to see him in pain, and she had a feeling Magnus’s calm demeanor hid a black hole full of hurt.

  “He’s never tried to reach out to you then, even with the success of your books?”

  Magnus’s laugh was bitter and short. “Nay, lass. But I’m m-m-m-much better without the b-b-b-b-bastard in my life. He’s not the forgiving sort, and he wasn’t that p-p-p-p-pleasant of company to b-b-b-b-begin with.”

  “Was it hard? Growing up on an island alone with him?” June asked quietly, dreading the answer, but needing to hear it.

  “Aye, lass.” Magnus turned to face her again, his blue eyes still dead. “But I d-d-d-don’t want to t-t-t-t-talk about it.”

  “Talking sometimes helps.”

  The laugh he gave was short and bitter. He brushed his hand along her cheek. “Lass, I know you like to b-b-blether, but havering never fixed a problem.”

  “What about your mama?” June asked.

  Magnus stiffened, his body taut. “I have not spoken to her since I was a p-p-p-p-peedie laddie. I h-h-h-hardly remember the woman.”

  “Has she tried to contact you?”

  Magnus glanced away, but not before she saw the answer in his face. She reached out and brushed her hand down his bicep. “What did she say?”

  “I wouldn’t know, lass. I never open her letters.”

  “She sends letters, not emails?” June asked in surprise.

  Magnus shrugged. “We’re a bit old-fashioned on T-T-T-Tammay. It is not unusual.”

  “But she doesn’t live there anymore,” June pointed out.

  When Magnus spoke, she could hear a thread of frustration in his voice. “Aye, but she was raised there. It’s a place that gets in the blood and stays there even if her folks originated from the Highlands.”

  “Maybe she sent the letters so you would know who the sender was,” June said. “It could be she wanted to give you the option of reading them or tossing them.”

  Magnus turned back to June, his eyes not lifeless anymore. Deep emotion burned inside them. He might have resolved things with his father, but not with his mother. “I don’t give a shite, June. I don’t want to argue with you either. Can you just let it be?”

  She would. For now.

  “Okay.”

  The blue fire in his eyes immediately banked. Instead, a fond smile drifted over his features. “You fash yourself too much, lass.”

  Then he turned and kissed her before returning to type on the laptop perched on his legs. He was on a writing streak… At least that’s what he claimed. Much to June’s annoyance, he wouldn’t let her take a peek at any of his work.

  Settling back against the pillows she’d arranged behind her back, she reached for the paperback she’d picked up at the hospital gift shop. But she couldn’t concentrate on the words. For once, though, it wasn’t because of worry for her nan. She was thinking about Magnus.

  No one should live without family. No one. It just wasn’t right. No wonder the man kept his emotions bottled up tighter than a good bourbon.

  His daddy sounded like a terrible person, but she wasn’t so sure about his mama. It wasn’t right to abandon a child, but maybe the woman had thought she had no choice. What if she’d tried to see her son, but his daddy wouldn’t let her? Magnus had said he was the unforgiving type.

  June spared a glance at Magnus. He looked so stoic, sitting there, tapping away at his keyboard. Although Magnus was one of the kindest men she’d ever met, he had a stubborn streak wider than the Mississippi during the spring melt. He wouldn’t pardon mistakes easily either. But that only hurt him.

  June thought about those unopened letters from his mama, and she couldn’t help but wonder what they contained. Maybe they could have helped Magnus. He said he’d blamed himself for her departure from Tammay. Although he’d said he’d made peace with her leaving, he’d never actually said whether he still believed he’d chased her away. Maybe his mama’s words would ease some unresolved pain. Maybe the woman felt as alone as her son.

  June straightened. She needed to do some digging on Magnus’s mama. She didn’t like to see things broken that could be fixed. And it would give her a nice distraction from worrying about her nan.

  * * *

  Honey heard a snuffling sound outside her burrow. It was Fluffy. She debated about chasing him away.

  His nose appeared at the opening to her den. She lifted her head and debated. With one swift strike of her claw, she could send him yelping back to his own sleeping quarters.

  But he had been amusing lately, and she hadn’t minded the times they’d fallen asleep pressed against each other. She had not experienced any other fun since the Giant One disappeared along with the Blond One. Perhaps Fluffy was not that bad.

  Fluffy’s eyes came into view next. He looked hopeful. Honey watched him carefully, but she did not snarl. Instead, she moved to allow him to enter her burrow. It was time to allow him to stay the night. She was ready for a new adventure.

  * * *

  “In the wild, adult b-b-b-bears, especially the males, are known to kill cubs. It is one of the many d-d-dangers a young polar bear faces after she leaves the den with her m-mum. Now our wee Sorcha here isn’t that old. She’s about two months old and isn’t even steady on her legs. Yet she’s about to meet a full-grown b-b-bear who isn’t her m-m-mum. And it’s not even a polar bear but a grizzly…”

  “Ooo, I like that,” June said as she hit the pause button on her tablet, which they were using to record Magnus’s voice. Later, Katie would synthesize his narration with the footage of the bears’ meeting. When June also paused the silent video playing on Magnus’s phone, the image on the screen froze, leaving a bright-eyed Sorcha staring up at them. The little tyke had certainly become more alert since June had seen her over a week ago. “But the meeting went fine, right?”

  “Just watch, lass,” Magnus said with a smile. “You’ll miss the whole experience if I give away the end. And you’re interrupting my narration.”

  June scowled. “It isn’t polite to keep a lady in suspense.”

  “I’m a writer, June. That’s my way.”

  “Well, then hurry up and finish.”

  “You’re the one who stopped m-me. I was going along fine.”

  June lightly bopped him on his arm and realized abruptly how normal she felt. Only Magnus could tease her into momentarily forgetting the worry clawing at her. Although antianxiety medicine had helped with Nan’s terrors, her grandmother remained in a haze nothing penetrated. Slowly, her body had fought off the UTI and her sodium levels had returned to normal, but she hadn’t.

  “Och, lass, there you go worrying again,” Magnus said. “Just listen to the tale.” Leaning forward, he turned on both the video and the recorder. Little Sorcha continued to explore her carrier as Magnus and Bowie transferred her to Frida’s den. Her tiny claws grabbed at the sides, scraping and testing it. Then she stuck her snout through the opening, her black nose wiggling. Satisfied with the scents she detected, she began to gum the metal.

  Then, a loud snuffling sound came from the outdoor enclosure. The cub froze in midchew, her black eyes huge. The camera panned upward to show Frida sniffing at the closed gate separating her outdoor enclosure from the indoor facility.

  “As you can see, we took p-p-precautions during this original meeting. If Frida t-t-tolerates our young cub, it will give Sorcha the chance to interact with another bear and learn important skills. Even though Sorcha won’t return to the wild, socialization is still important to her well-being. Sagebrush Zoo doesn’t have another p-p-p-polar bear, but they are a subspecies of grizzlies like Frida. In fact, the two types of bruins have succes
sfully b-b-b-bred and produced offspring. But will this elderly beastie accept the wee whalp?”

  Frida sniffed the air ominously, and June clutched at her neck. She couldn’t stand the tension. She turned off both devices.

  “I feel like a bug trapped in a web watching a spider approach,” June said. “What happens?”

  Magnus chuckled and laid his hand over hers. “Are you a feartie, June?”

  “No,” she said indignantly.

  “Just watch.”

  She sighed and sank back against the headboard. Magnus restarted the video, and June leaned forward. Bowie and Magnus cautiously moved the cub’s crate closer to the gate. Frida turned in their direction, her muzzle sticking through the metal bars as she smelled Sorcha’s scent. Her less rheumy eye latched onto the little bear. She stilled. Then she began to claw and dig at the gate while making a noise halfway between a growl and a moan. When that didn’t work, she pushed against the steel grate with her large body.

  “Is she trying to reach Sorcha to attack or take care of her?” June asked, forgetting to turn off the recorder. Realizing her mistake, she clasped her hand over her mouth. Luckily, Katie would be able to edit out her exclamation, but she hated disrupting Magnus’s voice-over, especially when he was doing such a good job.

  The elderly bear soon exhausted herself. Instead of wandering back to her favorite rock, she lay down with a sigh, her eyes trained on Sorcha. The camera zoomed in on her face, and June couldn’t stop her aww. The affection and protectiveness in Frida’s eyes were undeniable.

  “The zookeeper, Bowie Wilson, considered this meeting a success. We will still proceed carefully as we work to introduce these two b-b-bruins, but it seems for now Sorcha may have a bear m-m-mum after all, and Sylvia, the capybara, can get some well-earned relaxation before a new orphan arrives at the zoo.”

  Magnus finished, reclining back in the bed. June clapped her hands. “Oooo, I love it, Magnus. Your fans will just eat it up.”

  “So will my editor.”

  June paused as she reached forward to touch Magnus’s bicep. She was trying her darndest not to push him about his disfluency, but she had promised to help him. They’d grown closer—much closer—in the past couple weeks, and he’d become more relaxed in her presence. She hoped that meant he’d let her help him more.