Her Baby Secret (Friends & Lovers Book 1)

by Jaye Diane

  "I hope you're right because if something does happen, I'm going to scratch her eyes out and kick him in his balls."

  Despite her frazzled nerves and fragile emotions, Robyn giggled at her friend's ferocity. She loved Emerald so much.

  "I'm sure that won't be necessary," Robyn said, getting off of the couch. "I have to use the bathroom."

  After she used the bathroom, Robyn washed her hands, puzzled over the little exchange with Devin. Why was he so eager to talk now when he'd refused to talk the night of their breakup? Had he come to his senses? Well, it was too late. She wasn't going to stick around to be used and then discarded whenever he felt like it.

  Robyn scowled at her reflection in the bathroom mirror. She looked hideous. Her hair long brown hair was a tangled mess around her shoulders. She had bags under her eyes. Her light brown skin seemed even more pale than usual.

  "Ugh, I look sickly," She murmured to herself. All because of him. Well, part of it was because she was pregnant. But she knew that stressing over Devin was only making things worse. She promised herself that she'd try harder to move on. If she could just keep him out of her head, she could focus on the things that actually mattered.

  A couple days later, Christmas Eve morning, Robyn woke feeling very ill, which was her new normal. Once her stomach had settled, she forced down a couple slices of toast and an apple before double checking her duffle bag. She made sure she had all of the clothing and toiletries she'd need, along with the crackers, peppermints, lemon and potato chips that helped a little with her morning sickness.

  Once she was satisfied that she was all packed, she took her belongings to her car and came back for the bags of Christmas gifts that she'd purchased. Getting into her Rav4, she turned the radio on low and began driving to her parents' house.

  She hadn't planned on leaving so early but the forecast had predicted nearly two feet of snow and Robyn didn't want to get caught in the mess on the roads. The Christmas commute was always hectic at best and maddening at worst.

  Her parents had once lived in Jersey City but as they'd made more money, they'd moved out of the city. They lived in Elizabeth, which wasn't too far away, but far enough that Robyn didn't have to worry about them breathing down her neck. The drive didn't usually take too long but there were a good amount of cars on the road. With the traffic, Robyn made it in about forty-five minutes.

  She was surprised to see that the four-car garage was full, as well as blocked by two other cars. She recognized the cars. Her parents’ cars, of course. Her brother-in-law's car. And Mr. Jamison's car. The cars in the street were the surprise. They belonged to Javier and Ines, Devin's older brother and sister.

  "Hmm," Robyn murmured, driving down the middle class street, in search of a parking spot. The problem was, every house had a huge driveway. After going around the block a couple of times, Robyn finally found a spot all the way around the corner from her parents' home. She wondered why everyone was there so early. She usually arrived in the early afternoon and she was usually her parents' first guest. And Javy and Ines never came on Christmas Eve. They were both married, and usually spent Christmas Eve with their in-laws.

  By the time Robyn had squeezed into the tight parking spot, she was very annoyed. She fought the urge to punch the steering wheel or something. Her emotions easily raged and she didn't want to lose control of herself. But she was so annoyed. Now she'd have to make a couple of trips back and forth down the long street to get everything she'd brought out of the car and into the house.

  She stepped out of her car and took a minute to stretch her legs. She felt a slight ache in her back and hoped that it would pass now that she was no longer sitting. She grabbed her purse, her duffel bag, and one bag of gifts and slowly made her way around the corner and down the street to her parents’ house.

  The tall, gray two story house had six bedrooms but through the years, her parents had converted the attic and basement so that they had three bedrooms each. Her parents loved entertaining and keeping family together. Growing up, Robyn had lived with her family in a decent apartment and then in a modest house. She and Peyton had always shared a room. Her parents took great pride in how far they'd come.

  Trying to ignore the growing apprehension in the pit of her stomach, Robyn stared at the hundreds of lights that decorated the house. It was as pretty as always. She just wasn't feeling very cheerful. She climbed the porch stairs and reached for the brass door knob, finding the door locked. She could hear uproarious laughter inside and for some reason it caused a prick behind her eyes.

  She took a deep breath as the door swung open. Forcing a smile onto her face, she faced her father. Quintin Phillips was tall and as handsome as they come. Robyn put her bags down and let her father scoop her into his arms, the tears forcing their way through. When her father put her down, his brown eyes were round with alarm.

  “What's wrong, baby girl? Are you okay?”

  “I'm fine, Daddy,” Robyn hurried to assure him, wiping tears away but unable to push away the sadness that had suddenly overtaken her. “I'm just so glad to be here. I've missed you.”

  He watched her closely before answering. “Well, come by more often then.”

  “I will,” Robyn promised simply, hugging him again. She reached down to pick up her bags, but her father beat her to it, grabbing everything in one hand and wrapping his other arm around her. They stepped out of the foyer and into the huge living room. Robyn was swept into a series hugs, complete with kisses, and if anything, it put her even more on edge. Robyn greeted her mother, Jared and Angelica Jamison, Devin's parents, and Javier and Ines and their spouses. Robyn knew her growing anxiety came from the secret she carried within her, a baby that would be related to all the wonderful people in this room. The guilt she felt over not telling them was so overwhelming that she felt a little shaky.

  “I'm so excited,” Marjorie said when everyone had calmed down. “We haven't had this many people for Christmas Eve in years.”

  “I'm going to call Grace and Devin,” Angelica announced with a light Spanish accent, jumping up from the plump white couch where she'd just sat down. “They're the only ones not here. It would be so complete with them here.”

  Robyn's smile felt frozen on her face as she watched the gorgeous and petite woman walk out of the room in a rush. She'd thought she wouldn't have to deal with seeing Devin until the next day but if Angelica had her way, it would only be a matter of hours before he came.

  “We decided to change it up this year,” Enrique, Ines' husband, was saying to Quintin. “We're always with my family for Christmas Eve. I thought it would be nice to switch it for a change.”

  “Us too,” said Javy. “I mean, we still come on Christmas night, but it's not the same. I miss being with the fam on Christmas morning. No offense, babe,” He added, smiling at his wife.

  Elizabeth rolled her eyes. “None taken,” She assured him with a broad smile.

  “Well, I'm just glad you're all here.” Marjorie put her hands over her heart. “I treasure these moments.”

  Robyn looked away from her mother to the tall Christmas tree in the corner of the large room. She tried to focus on the tree and presents underneath it or the photos on the wall, but all she kept thinking about was the baby she carried and how she couldn't let anyone find out about him/her just yet.

  “Robyn, take off your coat,” Peyton said, holding her three year old on her lap. Whitney was actually sleeping through all the noise.

  “Oh, I have to go back to the car,” Robyn said, turning to leave the room. “I have a couple of bags to grab. I'll be right back.”

  “I'll walk you,” Javy said, standing up and following her.

  “You don't have to,” Robyn assured him with a bright smile – perhaps too bright.

  “It's no problem,” He said. He reached into the foyer closet and took out his coat, quickly putting it on. Javy and Devin looked very much alike although there was a five year age difference. They were both tall, dark and handsom
e. Devin and his siblings all had their mother's olive complexion and black hair and their father's hazel eyes. A gorgeous family.

  “Are you okay?” Javy asked after they were both out of the house.

  “Yeah, I'm good,” Robyn reassured him, glancing at him quickly with a smile. Growing up, Javy had always been the big brother she'd always wanted. She'd always felt too strongly for Devin to look at him in a brotherly way.

  “I wanted to talk to you in private,” Javy surprised her by saying.

  “Really?” Robyn couldn't hide her surprise.

  “I know about you and Devin.”

  Robyn faltered as she walked. “What are you talking about?”

  Javy stopped walking and grabbed her arm. He gently turned her to face him.

  “I knew that you guys were hanging out more than usual,” Javy said, staring at her with serious eyes. “Then all of a sudden you two weren't hanging out at all. And I know my brother. He has a broken heart. I saw him once and he looked terrible and he's avoided me ever since.”

  Robyn opened her mouth to speak but didn't know what to say. There was obviously no point in insulting Javy's intelligence by lying about it. And honestly, it felt good that someone knew. Someone could take a tiny bit of her burden. Just a tiny bit.

  “And now, seeing you, I can tell that you're just as bad off as he is. What went wrong?”

  “I really don't know,” Robyn said, staring down at the ground. “He seemed to be avoiding me...canceled our dates...and then showed up one day and broke up with me.” Robyn willed herself not to cry again. She was becoming so pitiful with all this damn crying. “So if you thought he had a broken heart, I think you're mistaken. He wanted our relationship to be over.”

  Javy shook his head. “Something must have happened. I don't know why he'd do something like that. He's been crazy about you for years.”

  Another surprise revelation.

  “I don't know what happened but it's all over now,” Robyn said. “Everything was great and then it suddenly wasn't and I'm just trying to move on.”

  Javy didn't say anything for a minute. He watched her closely.

  “I don't think you should give up so easily,” He said at last.

  “I didn't,” Robyn told him. “I was trying to talk everything out and he rejected me. I wanted to know what was wrong but your brother didn't even think I was worth that. So I'm done. It's for the best.”

  Javy opened his mouth to speak but Robyn cut him off, “Now let's hurry to the car before everyone wonders where we've gone. I don't want anybody to suspect that anything's wrong.”

  He silently nodded his head in agreement and they continued on to the car. Javy carried both bags back to the house, making idle conversation until they got back into the house.

  Robyn took off her coat and hung it in the closet then put the presents under the tree. There was a stack of gifts against the wall because it was so packed underneath the tree.

  “I'm going up to my room to freshen up,” Robyn announced.

  “I put your bag in the blue room,” Quintin said from his place on the couch where he held a steaming mug of coffee.

  “Thanks, Daddy,” Robyn said quickly, leaving the living room and going out to the foyer, where the staircase was. She hurried up the stairs and went into the room, closing the door behind her and kicking her black boots off of her feet. She suddenly felt exhausted.

  She liked the blue room. Each room in the house was a different color but the blue room was Robyn's favorite. The sky blue walls, curtains and blankets made the room feel light and airy like a spring day. Robyn lay back against the mound of pillows and soft blankets on the big soft bed and felt herself drifting. Just for a little while, she could sleep and ignore all the problems that surrounded her.

  Chapter Five

  Devin was at the Phillips house for more than an hour before he found the courage to casually ask where Robyn was.

  “She's asleep,” Peyton said from across the room where she was knitting.

  “I went to check on her,” Marjorie said, talking to no one in particular. “And she was asleep. I was going to get her up but I figure she must be exhausted if she's having a nap. Robyn never naps. I guess that's what comes with being a teacher,” Marjorie added.

  Peyton, who was a day care teacher, nodded. “Yes, with all the paperwork and the crazy hours of workshops, plus being in school all day, it is exhausting.”

  Devin was feeling exhausted himself. He'd actually been in the office working when his mother had called him. He hadn't been the only one working on Christmas Eve. At 50G Studios, a major name in video games, there was rarely a time that the place was empty. At twenty six, Devin was the youngest game designer in the entire company and he worked hard to make sure no one ever resented or regretted his presence.

  “It's snowing!” Whitney announced, standing on the couch and looking out the window. “Snow!”

  Devin smiled at the adorable little kid who reminded him so much of her aunt and mother. She was going to be a knockout just as Peyton and Robyn were.

  “Now they're saying that we're going to get two feet of snow,” Quintin grumbled. “These damn weathermen can't ever get the forecast right.”

  “I just got an alert on my phone saying that it's going to be a huge storm,” Ines said with a sigh. “A white Christmas indeed.”

  “At least we're already together,” Marjorie said happily. “I don't have to worry about anyone trying to get through the snow to get here.”

  Devin smiled and wondered how long before he could disappear to his own room. He was going to be using one of the attic bedrooms and he hoped that later he'd be able to somehow talk to Robyn without anyone seeing them.

  He had so much to say to her and he couldn't hold it in any longer. He regretted not talking on the night of their breakup but he'd stupidly let his pride get in the way. He wouldn't make that mistake again.

  On the TV, some holiday movie played. Devin couldn't make himself pay attention enough to find out exactly what it was. He went to the kitchen where his mother and brother-in-law were cooking dinner. Enrique worked as a cook in the restaurant his mother and Marjorie owned and he loved being in the kitchen just as much as the women did.

  “Smells good in here,” Devin said, leaning down a little to kiss his mother on the cheek. “I can't wait to get a taste of this feast.”

  He'd been skipping Sunday dinners lately, using work as an excuse as he tried to keep his sad feelings to himself. During the course of their brief relationship, Robyn had cooked for him on several occasions. But his mother didn't know that and it needed to stay that way, at least for now.

  “You need to come home more,” Angelica said, smiling at him and then stirring a gigantic pot of rice.

  “I will, Ma,” Devin said. “You know how my job is. Some days I work eight hours, some days ten or eleven. Or even more than that.”

  “But your job can't love you as much as you love it,” Angelica said quietly. “Working is not the only thing to do in the world.”

  Devin nodded quietly. It was always best to agree with his mother, especially when he knew that she was right.

  He sat at the small round glass table in the immaculate modern kitchen and ate a bowl of soup that his mother placed in front of him. She and Enrique worked closely together, putting together a Christmas Eve feast. For the first time in days, or weeks, Devin felt a glimmer of pleasure. He was surrounded by his family and he was near Robyn. Things had been so bad lately, there was nowhere to go but up.

  After Devin finished eating his soup, he went into the living room. Everybody was talking at the same time, spread out on the two couches and on the carpeted floor. A fire was now going in the fireplace. The room looked so cozy, stockings hung on the fireplace and the giant Christmas tree. He'd been dreading being with everyone for Christmas but now he was starting to feel glad that he'd come.

  He found a place on the thick carpet and leaned back, resolved to watching television. He saw
his brother watching him with a strange look on his face and raised his eyebrows at him. Javy raised his eyebrows in return but then turned to the television. Devin wondered for a second what the look was about but decided to ignore it.

  Home Alone was just starting and Devin stared at the screen though his mind drifted. He and Casey had become strangers in the couple of days since her little heartfelt confession. He knew they couldn't be friends if she harbored any romantic feelings towards him. It wasn't like what he'd gone through with Robyn. He'd wanted her for years but he'd never let it show. This was the second time that Casey had brought up a relationship happening between herself and him. He'd made himself very clear the first time around that it wasn't going to happen.

  He hated to throw away eight years of friendship but what kind of friendship would it be if he couldn't be himself? How could he be around her knowing that she liked him or lusted after him?

  “Hey, Robyn!” Peyton called.

  Ignoring how his heart automatically started leaping within his chest, Devin smiled as Robyn entered the room. God, she was beautiful. Her hair was damp from a shower and she looked adorable in a long red T-shirt with a goofy reindeer on the front of it and dark blue sweatpants.

  Everybody murmured hello and Devin wondered if he should get up and give her a hug. Ordinarily, everyone in their families hugged hello. But knowing that Robyn harbored some hostile feelings made him wonder if he should even try going near her. Then again, for appearances sake, he needed to behave as if everything was the same as always.

  He stood up and walked over, enveloping Robyn in a hug before he could give it any further thought. She stiffened in his arms but he pretended not to notice, even as it stabbed him in the heart.

  He kissed her on the cheek and murmured, “How are you?”

  “I'm fine, Devin,” She said, pulling back, smiling a brittle smile. “How are you?”

  “I'm good,” He said, breathing in the light citrus of her shampoo. It was a scent that he hadn't been able to get out of his mind in all the weeks since they'd stop seeing each other.