by Jason Cheek
“Dammit Sourgamin,” Hadow vehemently swore, “we’ve got to fall the fuck back!”
“What’s your fucking problem Hadow,” Sourgamin angrily asked.
“Look at the rest of the raid,” Hadow continued, not backing down as his eyes nervously scanned the area around them, “something is taking everyone out.”
“What the fuck is going on?” Sourgamin swore under her breath loud enough for Jodi to catch from where she hung over the other woman’s head. She paused to look over the clearing. “Where did the rest of the Elite Barbed Rippers go?”
Jodi suddenly found herself curious as to what was going on too. Not that she could do much of anything about it in her current position. Still, it meant something was going down that she should be aware of. Either her new friends were doing a hell of a lot better than she was or something else was going down.
“Why are there Fluffy Deaths everywhere?” Alissa asked in consternation from wherever she was camping out at.
“No clue,” Rikopin said from the other side of Jodi’s corpse, “but this ain’t looking good.”
‘Don’t do anything stupid,’ Fiona’s voice suddenly sounded in Jodi’s head, ‘the cavalry is coming.’
‘Fiona, you survived,’ Jodi sent back as a thrill went through her heart at hearing the Blink Lynx's voice. She’d really been worried about what had happened to her after all of that shit went down. Not that she’d really had any time to consciously think about it with her own PVP fun going on.
Still, it eased a worry that had been sitting in the back of Jodi’s mind. Well, that, and she didn’t want to have to deal with all of the bitching that would’ve come if she’d lost her amulet to a PKer. As her concern eased, Jodi’s eyes narrowed as what Fiona had said finally registered.
‘What do you mean, don’t do anything stupid?’ Jodi sent back; the annoyance clear in her mental tone, ‘And what cavalry is that?’
‘Ppplease, don’t act like I can read your thoughts,’ Fiona mockingly purred back as a mental picture of the Blink Lynx cleaning herself came to Jodi’s mind. As Jodi sent a mental image of her rolling her eyes, Fiona mysteriously continued, ‘As to your other point, you’ll see soon enough.’
Gah, I hate it when she does that, Jodi thought, as the Blink Lynx broke the mental connection. As she went back to listening to the Pwnguin’s discussion, a determined look came to her eyes. Like hell she was going to leave it like this, Jodi swore to herself. When these Pwnguin players thought back to this confrontation, she wanted them to remember that they’d been in a fight.
“There’s no way a bunch of trash mobs are taking everyone out,” Sourgamin snarled in clear frustration.
“Really?” Alissa mocking shot back, “because those Level 45 Elite “Trash Mobs”, as you put it, had no trouble taking out the entire raid earlier or did you already forget about that.”
“That was before we knew how dangerous they were,” Hadow argued in defense of their guild leader.
“Just leave that fucking bitch to deal with them on her own dime,” Rikopin unhappily chimed in from where he was hiding at the edge of the woods nearby, “She’ll lose more fucking XP if they kill her than she would if we did it.”
“That’s not the point,” Sourgamin said, letting out a sigh of frustration, “Look Alissa, you know as well as I do that if that fucking cunt gets geared up and starts-”
The annoying woman’s voice cut off in mid-bitch as a chorus of screams came from the rest of her guildmates and several Multi-Shots slammed into her chest. As the Rogue staggered backwards in surprise, Jodi knew this was her only chance to make the impression that she wanted. With a piercing shriek of rage, she launched herself at the other woman, using her legs to push off the branch for some extra umph.
“You’re mine bitch!” Jodi screamed like a Valkyrie as she slammed her elbow into the Pwnguin’s Guild Leader’s nose just like her husband had taught her. Hearing the cartilage and bone crunch under the blow, her eyes widened in surprise at its effectiveness as she commenced to pound Sourgamin into the ground yelling out whatever shit came to her mind.
“Call me a cunt again bitch,” Jodi howled, not slowing down the blows she was raining down on the woman’s head, “I fucking dare you!”
In the back of her mind, Jodi knew that John and the rest of their gaming friends were going to be ribbing her about this fight once they caught up to her stream. Her shit-talking was almost legendary in their gaming group. Not that her husband hadn’t known how she was before they’d married, because she was even worse in bed, Jodi silently crowed. On the flip side, getting worked up did help her play better. That, and it helped her work out the tension from a hard day at work, which she had a shit-ton of to get out of her system after all of that crap with Startum and his videos.
“Get off of me you psycho,” Sourgamin screeched, shaking off the shock of the brutal ambush and the following ass beating as she began stabbing Jodi in the kidneys with her back-up dagger, “and give me my goddamn dagger back!”
Jodi rolled off of the other woman to get away from her brutal strikes as her health began flashing in the red. She might be the higher-level player but she’d resurrected with only a quarter of her health and mana. Nonetheless, she wasn’t about to give up yet as Sourgamin wobbly climbed to her feet.
“I’m so going to take you out before your friends can save you,” Sourgamin snarled as she crouched down low to lunge at Jodi.
Though the move kept her out of the line of attack for whoever was taking out the woman’s guildmates, it didn’t stop Jodi’s secret weapon. Before Sourgamin could strike, there was a pop of displaced air as Fiona appeared behind the Pwnguin Guild Leader’s back. There was that stunned split-second “checkmate” look that the two women shared, before the Blink Lynx’s fangs sank into the back of Sourgamin’s neck.
“No, you’re not,” Jodi said, not bothering to hide the wicked gleam that came to her eyes as the Rogue was yanked back onto her heels from Fiona clawing at her back. While the Blink Lynx shredded the woman’s armor and back, Jodi used a move that she’d picked up from her young clubbing days as she kneed Sourgamin in the groin, “because I’m going to kick the ever-loving shit out of you!”
The look of absolute shock on the other woman’s face was priceless as she collapsed to her knees. Obviously, she’d never been kicked in the pubic bone before. Not an experience you’d want to go through, Jodi thought with a snort at the old memory, because she knew from first-hand experience that it hurt a woman just as much as it did a man. To her relief, it was nice to see that it also worked in The World too. Ripping the dagger out of Sourgamin’s stunned hands, Jodi got up into the woman’s face.
“Thanks for the new pair of back-up daggers,” she taunted, before ramming the blade to the hilt in her chest. As John always said, if you were going to face down a group of PKers, then do it with style so they remembered your name. “Hopefully, your corpse will have something I can actually use.”
With that, Jodi kicked Sourgamin off the blade as Fiona finished her off. She smiled to herself as she saw the confirmation for the kill pop up in her system window.
You have killed Sourgamin Pikachu!
Bet you’ll think twice before fucking with us again, Jodi thought with a mental snort, as she felt Fiona’s approving purr resonate in her head. Glancing at the dagger that she’d snagged from the PKer, she did a quick Identify.
Wicked Long Dagger of Piercing
Item Quality: Good
Item Type: Superior
Attack: One-hand Edge
Weapon Type: Dagger
Damage: 67-73
Durability: 193/200
Weight: 2.7 kg
+7 Agility
+5 Stamina
+5% Chance to Crit
Not bad, Jodi thought, it was a decent backup weapon to keep in her backpack in case she was killed. Squatting next to Sourgamin’s body, she quickly looted the corpse. There was a surprising amount of silver and coppers coins in the
pouch on the corpse. That, and an amazingly nice ring.
Ring of Shadows
Item Quality: Rare
Item Type: Crafted
Slot: Ring
Weight: .04 kg
*Allows wearer to disappear into Stealth even while under attack or being observed.
*Makes it 25% harder to perceive wearer while in Stealth.
Someone was going to be pissed as all get-out for losing that.
‘Who’s your friends?’ Jodi sent to Fiona as she slipped the ring onto her finger and quickly looked back in the direction that the Blink Lynx’s cavalry had come from.
‘Someone you already know,’ Fiona’s sent, as Jodi paused in surprise at the familiar face that she saw waiting at the edge of the treeline.
“We didn’t want to interfere with your revenge,” Elandorr smoothly said as the rest of his team finished looting the PKers’ corpses.
“I thought all of you left us to face this alone,” Jodi asked dumbfounded at seeing a group of twenty-four NPCs in the Dark Woods behind him. Had they really come back for them?
“Hardly,” Elandorr said with an easy laugh, “collect your gear and I’ll explain.”
“This should be good,” Jodi muttered under her breath, as she began clearing out her gravestones.
From what Elandorr explained, the NPCs had used the players’ ability to respawn to fall back from the initial assault. Jodi didn’t blame them there since there was no way they could’ve fought off the train of death that even now was slaughtering Zeppy’s Heroes guild with abandon. What she found interesting was that while the Elite Barbed Rippers were trampling over the players, the NPCs had been busy hunting down the PKers that had run the train and kicking their asses. Jodi paused, momentarily distracted as she did a quick Identify on the recovered dagger that she’d swiped earlier from a corpse to suicide with.
Frost Dagger of Slowing
Item Quality: Good
Item Type: Superior
Attack: One-hand Edge
Weapon Type: Dagger
Damage: 77-83
Durability: 151/200
Weight: 2.7 kg
+8 Agility
+3 Strength
*Slows target by 25% with a successful strike.
Damn, now that was nice, Jodi silently thought, planning to use that as her knew back-up dagger for her equipment belt. While it wasn’t as good as her main daggers that she kept strapped to her quiver Legolas style, it was still a sweet drop. No wonder the Pwnguin Guild Leader was so pissed about losing her blade. Jodi laughed to herself, as she thought that's blades now. She went to her primary gravestone and began getting dressed humming the old nursery rhyme finders, keepers, losers, weepers.
“What’s up with all of the Elite Fluffy Deaths?” Jodi asked, as she strapped on the last of her gear.
Not that here leathers were adequate protection any more with the massive hole in the center of her abdomen and her pants leg missing from mid-thigh down on one leg. It was more like the fantasy armor you’d expect to see from some erotic artist than truly functional armor. Not that Jodi didn’t enjoy how sexy you could look in many of the MMO games, it just felt funny when everyone else around her was geared up with fully functional armor.
“That’s the last push of the region to force out the invaders before it levels up again,” Elandorr explained with a concerned undertone to his words. Nodding towards the clearing and the no-holds-barred fighting going on between the monsters and the players, he continued gravely, “Come, we need to evacuate the rest of your friends now.”
“What about these guys?” Jodi asked, nodding at the gravestones only to realize that they’d turned white. To her surprise, Elandorr didn’t even bat an eye at the question.
“They’re not our problem now,” Elandorr said with a dark chuckle as he eyed the white gravestones, “unless they manage to make it back here from the graveyard quicker than expected.”
Once again, Jodi was taken aback at the Rogue’s reaction to the player’s ability to respawn. She would’ve expected them not to understand that players were … well players and could respawn. Seeing the disturbed look that flashed across her face, once again the NPC’s words surprised her.
“Don’t worry,” Elandorr said, as the side of his lip curled in distaste, “we are all well aware of newfar abilities to self-resurrect at the nearest graveyard thanks to Lord Ironwolf.” His dusty-brown eyes turned hard as his lips thinned. “I expect most of the PKers, as you newfar like to call them, have chosen to respawn at whatever graveyard they found themselves at.”
“Uhm, sounds good,” Jodi said in a squeak, as she silently thought, “Well, fuck me.” Really, what was there for her to say after hearing that? Not that the odd Rogue waited around for further pleasantries. Giving her a nod, he took off along the edge of the woods at a fast run, leaving Jodi to silently fall in amongst the raid of all-too-real NPCs as she began restoring her personal buffs.
There was an aura of professional capability about them that Jodi felt as they moved towards the ongoing battle in the clearing on a roundabout path. It was hard to explain what she was feeling, but it was something that she’d often felt with her older brother Thomas and his ex-military friends. To Jodi’s surprise, as they approached a pile of broken trunks and branches from earlier, she noticed a number of Rangers and Rogues already in place as they waited for the coming action.
It wasn’t just that. There was a number of heavy wooden spikes driven into the ground and sharpened into points and even a few trenches that looked like they would do some major damage to whatever Elite Barbed Ripper that ended up finding it with a hoof. As the raid began splitting away to take up what looked to be preplanned positions, Jodi hurriedly caught up with the Rogue.
“Why did you save me first?” Jodi asked, as she fell instep beside Elandorr. It was a question that had been slowly building in the back of her mind as she took in the preparations that they’d obviously made.
“You were the only newfar that managed to get clear of the initial death ground,” Elandorr said, as they walked up to a familiar group of Assault Leaders. Lowering his voice, he gave her a wink. “Besides, it looked like you could use a hand.”
“Umm, thanks Elandorr,” Jodi said, feeling somewhat self-conscious at her heartfelt words. Seriously, who thanked an NPC for what they did in an MMO?
“It’s what Lord Ironwolf would’ve wanted us to do,” Elandorr said without hesitation. As Jodi came to an uneasy stop at the mention of the infamous Startum Ironwolf, the Rogue’s next words just made her feel even more uncomfortable. “That’s to look out for our own and to stand against those newfar that do evil,” a frown flashed across the Half-Elf’s handsome face, “well, any evil, really.”
“That’s a pretty broad statement,” Jodi automatically said, before she could stop herself, “isn’t evil basically in the eye of the beholder?”
“Funny you should say that,” Elandorr said, not seeming to be offended in the least, “that’s pretty much what I asked.” Jodi shifted uncomfortably as a faraway look came to the Half-Elf’s dusty-brown eyes. “Lord Ironwolf's answer was, you’ll usually know when you see it.”
“Are we doing this or not Elandorr,” Ara barked out, interrupting whatever else the Rogue was going to say, “If we don’t do this now, there’s no way well break them free once those critters get in the mix.”
“Coming,” Elandorr said, giving Jodi a reassuring clap, “Stay here and assist with range support the best you can while we extract the rest of the raid.”
With that, the Rogue turned away to join his team as his black cloak rippled behind him. Jodi would’ve been annoyed if that had been a female thing, but with Ara leading the raid’s tanks, she knew that was far from the case. That, and the Rogue team had been pretty balanced between both sexes. No, in Jodi’s heart, she knew it was simply due to her being on average ten levels lower than the NPCs. Not to mention, she was simply being asked to stay with the rest of the Rangers and add in
her ranged support which was what she’d built her class to do.
Chapter Sixteen
(Zeppy Blau leading the fighting retreat from the Dark Wood’s clearing.)
““Hoorah!”” The handful of survivors cheered out as the fourth Young Boar went down. As a banged-up Grody slid off of the dead monster’s back, a grimy Zeppy staggered away from the gaping wound that he’d been working on covered head-to-toe in gore. He swore that it had taken everything he and his guildmates had to take the fuckers down. While the bastards were still Elite Barbed Rippers, they were thankfully only in the level 35 range. Meaning his people at least had a chance to damage the bastards.
““Rrreeeiii!””
“Fuck a duck!” Zeppy snarled, as his face darkened in frustration at the chorus of bestial shrieks that came from around the clearing. He could already see that eight of the nearest sows had aggroed on them from their recent kills. As if being in Level 55 plus range wasn’t bad enough, they were doubly fucked since it seemed like each of the Young Boars had been from a separate herd. “We’ve got incoming people!”
Even though they were all mentally exhausted from the constant ass-whooping and graveyard runs, Zeppy’s people began forming backup while the sows aggressively began pawing at the ground in preparation to charge. He’d been afraid this was going to happen when they killed the Young Boars, he honestly didn’t know what else they could do. Besides that, it was the best option that they’d had while the rest of the herds had been distracted by the Lead Boars challenging each other for position and females.
Not that they’d had much of a choice once the Young Boars had stayed around to hunt the rest of them down every time they respawned. Though he’d managed to work with his people to pull back as much as they could to the treeline that led to the denser part of the Dark Woods, they’d only been able to do that by taking out these lower-level monsters. What sucked was that they were about to get their asses handed to them all over again.