Simply Being Belle

by Rosemarie Naramore

  She groaned loudly as she stepped into the shower. She basked under too-hot water, hoping the warmth might soothe her tired muscles. She suspected it would take more than her usual three cups of coffee to jump-start her tired mind. Once she had dressed and readied for her day, she gingerly walked down the stairs to the kitchen, her muscles protesting with each step she took.

  Why had she been so determined to be the first to reach the top of that dune—to beat Dare? Sure, it was a friendly competition—initially anyway—but why was it so important to her to win? Had she not been so determined to best him, she would certainly be in better shape today.

  Suddenly, she missed Dare terribly. She didn’t feel like going to work, but wanted more than anything to return to her warm bed. More than that, she wanted Dare’s arms around her.

  Again, she wondered, why was she so intent on winning? And would her work ethic—desire to win—cost her a relationship with him?

  As she sipped her coffee, she pondered the question. And then it hit her. Her work ethic did have much to do with that stupid Sweet Sixteen tape. Everything she was today seemed to have some connection to that awful thing. She was and had been so determined to prove herself different from the person on that tape, that she often worked herself into a frazzle proving to others she was worthy. Or perhaps, it was her way of proving it to herself. Maybe, on some level, it even allowed her to justify pushing people away—another thought that required more time to contemplate than she could allot at the moment.

  She winced when she remembered that just before she and Dare had left the beach, he had implored her to destroy the tape, as if it might somehow erase her need to work so hard. As if by destroying it, he might find a way into her life.

  She had told him she couldn’t destroy the tape yet.

  She thought too about Dare’s discontentment with his work at Preston and Dunne. She certainly understood it. She had lived it. She knew that to be successful at the firm, he would need to give everything of himself to the business. The job was all-consuming—in every sense of the word. Would he manage to make time for her if he stayed there?

  Suddenly, it hit her like a brick upside her head. If she continued along the path she was going, she wouldn’t have him in her life. She couldn’t. There simply wasn’t time for him, or anyone else for that matter. She realized she hadn’t even seen Lacey, Steven, or other friends for some time. She missed them.

  Even her dogs were suffering due to her absence from their lives, and the kitten. She groaned. How would she possibly make time for them with the addition of new and even greater responsibilities? Work at Legal Aid and work at Elm Place. She weighed the two. What should she do?

  She realized, she couldn’t lose Dare. He’d said he loved her. And she knew with certainty that she loved him, too. She felt lost, in need of comfort, and her very first inclination was to turn to him.

  By the time she arrived at work, she knew exactly what she needed to do. It wouldn’t be easy, and it saddened her on some level, but elated her far more.

  Suddenly, the future felt rife with possibilities.

  ***

  “Belle, are you sure?” Millicent asked her for the umpteenth time. “Truly sure?”

  She smiled serenely as she nodded. “I am sure. I’ve loved my time here, more than I can say, but it’s time to move on.”

  “You’ll oversee your grandfather’s foundation then?” Millicent asked.

  She nodded. “I think it’s what he would want,” she said, realizing it was true. Her grandfather had spoken to her often about his wish to use the charitable foundation for the betterment of the community, but had also voiced his fears that the wrong person in charge could be a recipe for disaster. Thankfully, there had been no incidents of impropriety to date. She aimed to see there never would be.

  “Well, if you’re sure,” Millicent said with a sad sigh. “You know how much we’ll miss you.”

  She smiled. “I’ll miss you, too. Will you call Dare and offer him the job today?”

  Millicent met her gaze and nodded. “Absolutely. The workload is increasing as we speak. We can really use him, although no one can replace you, my friend.”

  “I appreciate that, but I think Dare will do just fine.”

  When Belle stepped out of Millicent’s office, her mind preoccupied, she hadn’t noticed Dare standing in the hallway talking to Steven until she’d slammed into him. He reached out strong arms to steady her. “Careful,” he said, smiling into her eyes.

  “What are you doing here?” she asked in surprise.

  “Good to see you, too,” he said, laughing lightly.

  Standing so near to him, she felt her heartbeat quicken. His gaze swept over her, which caused her face to warm. He watched her curiously. “Are you feeling all right?” he asked with concern.

  She couldn’t tell him she’d just made a life altering decision—one that would prompt him to make a life altering decision, so she stared at him blankly.

  “She’s just exhausted,” Steven commented with a chuckle. “And for good reason, it sounds like.” He burst out laughing. “Dare, I can just see Belle trudging up that dune, leaving you in her … sand. The little lawyer that could…” he quipped, referencing the children’s tale about the little engine that could. He laughed again, obviously pleased with himself.

  Belle felt a blush spill across her cheeks. Had Dare been joking about her to Steven? Was she a joke? She caught his gaze, and he didn’t miss the flash of hurt in her lavender eyes.

  Instinctively, he reached out to soothe her—he hadn’t spoken to Steven about her in the way he had intimated. Belle was not a joke to him—would never be. He had spoken about her admiringly. He still couldn’t believe how she had powered up that dune as if it were no more difficult than a stroll through the park.

  Millicent stepped into the hallway then, her face registering pleasure at finding Dare there. “Just the man I need to speak to,” she said eagerly. “Do you have a minute?”

  He glanced at Belle uncertainly. He needed to talk to her first, but it wasn’t to be. She stepped away from him and to his surprise, left Legal Aid without so much as a backwards glance.

  Chapter Twenty

  After leaving Legal Aid, Belle didn’t go home. Steven’s words earlier had stung, and she wanted desperately to get her mind off of them. He had laughed at her. Had Dare been laughing at her, too? Joking about her, or their trip together? She couldn’t bear the thought, particularly when she’d realized just how much she cared for him and … just as she had forfeited something so precious to her for him—for them—her job at Legal Aid.

  Instead of heading home, she’d gone for a walk in the park. During her stroll, she had called Jacob Biggs and explained she could devote herself to work at Elm Place on a near full-time basis. He had been thrilled. She hadn’t committed to a forty-hour work week as yet, though she wasn’t exactly certain why. She decided she would slow the pace somewhat. It was definitely time.

  When she arrived home early evening, to her surprise, she found Dare, Lacey, and Steven waiting for her on her porch. Dare was the first to speak. “We need to talk.”

  She straightened her shoulders, bracing herself for what was to come. Was he about to apologize to her for making fun of her?

  “Actually, I need to talk first,” Steven said. He met Belle’s steady gaze. “When I was teasing you at work earlier, Belle, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. I want you to know, Dare hadn’t spoken about you in a joking or condescending way. He had mentioned how impressed he was with your stamina in climbing the dune…” He raked a hand through his hair. “It was me who made a joke out of it.”

  “I would never laugh at you, Belle,” Dare said sincerely, leveling his gaze at her. “I love you.” He seemed to remember they had an audience, and reddened slightly.

  “We should go,” Lacey said. “So you two can talk.” She smiled suddenly. “I still can’t believe you gave your notice at Legal Aid today, Belle.”

 
“We’re really going miss you,” Steven said.

  She sighed heavily. “It was time.”

  She turned and put her key in the door. She stepped inside, and Lacey and Steven turned to go. Belle was surprised when Dare asked them to stay.

  She watched him curiously. Why did he want Lacey and Steven to stay? Presumably, she and Dare had things to discuss. They couldn’t very well talk with their friends in the room.

  Dare asked the couple to sit down, and then turned to Belle. “You and I need to talk privately, but first, there’s something we need to do.”

  She shook her head slightly, watching him uneasily. He was acting strangely, and she couldn’t fathom why. He turned to Lacey and Steven. “Okay, I have something to say. First and foremost, I love Belle and plan to ask her to marry me. Not tonight, though I’ve given her fair warning.” He turned to her then, smiling. She watched him in stunned surprise.

  He turned his attention back to Lacey and Steven. “As her friends, you’ve spent an inordinate amount of time trying to change her. I’ve done some of that myself, though my reasons have been selfish. Time with her is at a premium considering her work schedule, and the truth is, I want more of her time.” He turned to Belle. “We’ll talk about that part later, too.”

  He continued speaking, “As we all know, Belle watches the tape of her Sweet Sixteen party on her birthday each year. Like you both, I’ve urged her to destroy that tape.”

  Both Lacey and Steven nodded in agreement.

  “I want her to destroy it for a variety of reasons—one … I think may surprise all of you.” He turned to Belle then, searching her eyes. “My fear, Belle, is that if you can’t forgive yourself for the person you once were, you may be unable to forgive others for their mistakes…” He grimaced. “More precisely, I fear that you won’t be able to forgive me.”

  She furrowed her brow. What was he talking about? “But I would never…” She shook her head in confusion. “Forgive you for what?”

  She wondered, was he referring to her hurt feelings over Steven’s joke earlier. She nearly asked, but he raised a hand to silence hear, seeming to forge ahead with a purpose.

  “Where’s that tape? Please.”

  “I won’t watch it now, Dare,” she said. “Not today.”

  “Please, Belle. Where is it? We need to put it to rest for so many reasons?”

  She couldn’t refuse him when she saw the earnest, pleading look in his eyes. She rose slowly and walked to the armoire where it was stored. She pulled it out and passed it to him. All the while, Lacey and Steven watched him curiously.

  When he slipped the tape into the VCR, Belle took a seat on the couch, wincing as the tape began. Once again, she saw her sixteen-year-old self, and could hardly bear watching. To her relief, Dare fast forwarded the tape until…

  Finally, he apparently found what he was searching for, since he paused the tape. “Please watch carefully,” he directed to Belle and their friends.

  He started the tape again, and they watched the scene where the teenaged boy had declared Belle’s new purple BMW “awesome” and the party “tight.” He stopped the tape again, then replayed the scene a second time.

  “Dare, I don’t…” she began, and he turned to meet her gaze.

  “That’s me, Belle,” he said. “That shaggy-headed kid is me.”

  “I don’t…” she began again, but her words dwindled.

  “Belle, I was a nearly eighteen-year-old kid who happened to get a hold of an invitation to your party. I was a cocky jerk back then,” he acknowledged ruefully.

  Belle, Lacey, and Steven watched him, wide-eyed and mouths agape. Lacey broke the silence when she cracked up laughing. “Oh, my gosh,” she murmured.

  “You see, Belle,” he said, “you’re convinced you were such a horrible person at age sixteen. I was nearly an adult, and look at the piece of work I was.”

  Steven joined in laughing with Lacey. “Oh, this is hysterical,” he said, shaking his head. “Oh, man.”

  Belle was speechless, watching Dare with a thoroughly shocked expression on her face.

  “Belle, if you can’t forgive yourself for the person you once were, how are you ever going to forgive me?” he asked.

  To add emphasis to the question, he again played the part of the tape featuring him. She watched in apparently abject horror, and then dropped her head into her hands. At the sight of her misery, Dare felt a wave of fear wash over him. Had he made a mistake in showing her? Had he effectively ruined any chance for a future with her? Would she ever forgive him?

  When he saw her shoulders heave, he realized she was crying. He felt as if someone had shoved a knife into his heart. He realized with a start, he had effectively done it to himself. He could have left it alone—Belle intended to destroy the tape next year, when she turned thirty. Had he kept his mouth shut, she would have been none the wiser. But he couldn’t lie to her. It was no way to start a life together.

  Lacey and Steven abruptly stopped laughing, realizing Belle was racked with grief. They watched sadly as Dare crossed the room and put a gentle hand on her shoulder. “Sweetheart, can you forgive me? I had to tell you, since you put so much stock in that tape. Heck, Belle, you let it define you. I don’t want it to define me in your eyes.” He gave an anguished sigh, and finally, she looked up.

  “You … were … awful,” she cried, and it was then he realized she had been laughing, not crying. She wasn’t racked with grief. She was laughing so hard she shook. She could hardly get the words out when she spoke again. “We’re … perfect … for … each … other,” she finally managed.

  His face broke into a relieved smile. He joined her laughing. “We are pretty perfect,” he agreed, reaching for her hands and pulling her up to him. He turned to their friends. “You two can go now,” he said with a grin. “I can take it from here.”

  The twosome quietly left. Belle continued laughing, leaning against Dare for support. He was perfectly happy to give it. “Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked, tipping her face to his.

  He shrugged helplessly and ran a hand through his hair. “I wasn’t sure you could like me, let alone love me, if you realized I was the kid in the tape. I mean, clearly, sixteen-year-old Belle and nearly eighteen-year-old Dare had a lot in common.”

  She nodded in understanding, and then her eyes widened in wonder. “That tape suddenly doesn’t seem like such a big deal anymore.”

  “Really?”

  She nodded. “I mean, you turned out all right, all things considered.”

  “And you certainly turned out all right,” he said, smiling into her eyes. “So, you can forgive the goofy kid I was back then?” he asked with a sparkle of humor in his eyes.

  She laughed easily. “What’s to forgive? But can you really forgive me?”

  “There’s nothing to forgive,” he assured her.

  She laughed lightly and Dare pulled her to him, kissing her soundly.

  “By the way, I’m cutting back my work hours,” she informed with a breathy chuckle. “Way back.”

  He kissed her again.

  “I’ll expect you to do the same,” she added.

  “Sounds good to me. Let’s hope Millicent is agreeable.”

  “Let’s hope,” she said dreamily. “It’ll be good for the dogs and kitten.”

  “And for the kids,” Dare laughed. “It’s nine to five for us from now on,” he added fiercely.

  “I don’t know,” she said, “ten to four sounds all right. Maybe even eleven to three. Who knows?”

  “Who knows?” he said, smiling contently as he wrapped her in a tender embrace and sought her lips with his own.

  The End

 

 

 
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