Perigee Moon

by Fuller, Tara

  “Your Grams is the coolest,” Bevin said after Grams had left. “And you’re welcome for the alibi by the way.”

  I smiled and smoothed my hands over my skirt. “Thanks.” I stared into the dark folds of silky fabric draped across my lap. Was I actually going to do this?

  “He loves you Rowan,” Bevin said as if she could sense my doubts. “I mean he really loves you. If you do decide you’re ready. He’s the one. Trust me on that.”

  I nodded. She was right. He was the one.

  After Tyler, Bevin, and Paige dropped us off a block from the house and headed to the movies without us, Alex laced his fingers through mine and pulled me through the dark and twisted forest. It seemed like miles before he pulled open the creaky door to the small one-room cabin and told me to wait outside. I wiped my sweaty palms across my skirt and took a deep breath to calm myself. It was nine o’clock. Alex would have to do the spell at midnight if it was going to work. That meant I only had three more hours with him. If all went well then we’d have a lifetime after that. If not, well I wasn’t going to think about that.

  “Okay it’s ready,” he said as he pulled me through the door. He really had made the place his own. There was a small cot in one corner made up with a few flannel blankets and the edges of the room were lined with lit candles, hardened puddles of wax held them in place from previous night’s use. A stack of books sat by the bed and there was a wood-burning fireplace in the corner that remained unlit.

  “What do you think?” he asked, running a hand through his hair like he was unsure of what to do next.

  I took a slow step around him to inspect the room further and nodded, breathing in the sweet smell of aged cedar planks. “I like it,” I said. “What is this place?”

  “An abandoned hunting shack. It hasn’t been used in years. I found it a while back on one of my trips. I’m not sure if anyone even knows it’s out here.”

  “Oh.” I twirled a strand of hair around my index finger nervously. We were completely alone. The thought sent shivers through me.

  “Still feeling sick?” he asked, his smooth voice filling the tiny space around us and suddenly he was behind me, moving my hair over my shoulder so that he could kiss my neck.

  “No.” I closed my eyes as the warmth from his lips swept through me, then I twisted around in his arms to look into his eyes. God they were so blue, so full of love. I wanted to look into his eyes forever, to drown in them.

  “I’m sorry I made you leave your party. I just wanted you for myself,” I said, breaking the intense silence between us.

  He grinned and kissed my forehead. “No need to be sorry love. I’m yours.”

  “Good.” I nuzzled my face into the hollow of his neck. He shivered and my breath caught in my throat.

  “So now that you have me here. What do you plan to do with me?” he asked, playfully.

  Breathe Rowan, I ordered myself silently. Breathe. The flames from a few of the candles flared up, dousing us with heat as my emotions churned inside of me. I could feel him tense at my silence. “Rowan?”

  “Alex.” I took another shaky breath, keeping my face buried in the crook of his neck. God I wished I knew how to do this. But I didn’t. I only knew how I felt so for better or for worse I let that indescribable heat guide me as I tilted my face up to kiss him.

  He didn’t hesitate, instantly meeting my lips with the kind of fervor that was swimming inside me. His hands slipped around my waist and before I knew it he had spun me around so that my back was pressed against the splintered cabin door, creaking against our weight as he pressed me into it.

  “Alex,” I whispered when he broke away to leave a string of kisses across my jaw, his nose lightly skimming my throat before bringing his lips down to my shoulder.

  “Hmm?” His lips made a full circle as they came back up to meet mine. He kissed me hard for a moment then broke away again to let me breathe. As if that were even possible at this point.

  His lips were at my ear and I pressed my mouth against his neck feeling like I was about to spontaneously combust at any moment. Squeezing my eyes shut I swallowed past the fear in my throat finally letting the words come. “Alex make love to me.”

  He froze and I held my breath. God what was I thinking? How could I just say it out loud like that? I had no idea what I was doing.

  He didn’t pull back to look at me but I could feel him looking away. “You don’t know what you’re saying.” His trembling arms loosening around me, his emotions wavering and torn as they poured into me.

  “Yes I do.” I had to stand my ground.

  He finally pulled back slowly and forced me to look at him. “Rowan I might not come back.” I squeezed my eyes shut, refusing to hear this. He shook me lightly to get my attention. “What if I don’t come back?”

  “Then I’ll never regret it.” I was surprised at how calm and sure I sounded, like a stranger compared to the nervous girl inside.

  “You’re sure about that?”

  “It’s the only thing I’m sure of anymore. You are the only thing I’m sure of anymore, Alex. I love you.” And it was true. I knew I would never forgive myself for not taking this opportunity if he didn’t come back.

  Shaking, he leaned in and kissed me softly before letting his lips drift around to my ear. “Rowan, I need to say so much. Too much. There’s not enough time to say all of the things I want to say to you.”

  He looked down at me and his eyes were an indescribable color against the firelight, a deep inky blue.

  “Then show me,” I whispered, my eyes swimming in moisture, overcome with both of our emotions. He reached up to touch my face and it sparked a fuse within me. I pulled his lips back to mine. It happened very fast then, as we both succumbed to the desire flowing through us. In one swift movement Alex pulled me up so that my legs were wrapped around his hips, clinging to him as he carried me to the tiny cot tucked away against the wall. It was small, the rusted springs groaning under our weight as he lowered me down. But it didn’t matter. Alex’s hands swept over me like wild fire infusing me with life and love and warmth. My hands tangled in his hair as I pressed against him, willing myself to melt into him. All I could think was this was right.

  My fingers fumbled nervously with the buttons of his shirt as he wedged a knee in between my legs, squaring his hips with mine, before finally tearing free from his shirt and tossing it to the floor. His hands scalded my thighs, burning with warmth as he slid my dress up, then rushed to unbutton his jeans that were already hanging low around his hips. But before he could get them undone he froze, his lips completely still above mine. He wasn’t even breathing.

  “Alex?” I said, afraid as my breath left a puff of white fog against the now-chilled air in the cabin.

  He pressed his finger to my lips and I could feel the fear coming off of him in waves.

  The sound of frost crackling along the walls of the tiny windowless cabin sent waves of terror through me. It was here. It was happening again.

  “Not again,” I whispered. Alex slid off of me scanning the room. In that instant a gust of wind tore through the room, extinguishing all but a few of the candles. It screamed so loudly I couldn’t hear myself think. I didn’t know who this ghost was, but it was pretty obvious that it didn’t want me to have a love life.

  Alex grabbed my hand, yanking me onto the floor.

  “Rowan we have to do a circle.” he shouted, pulling me so close that his lips were at my ear. “You have to help me. Now!”

  “But I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t have power like yours Alex.” At that moment I wished I did. I wished I could be an equal to Alex.

  “You do. You have more magic in you than you realize. I can feel it,” he said, his lips at my ear. “I need you for this Rowan.”

  I backed away and nodded, swallowing through both of our fear. “What do you need me to do?”

  “Just follow my lead.” He hopped up and grabbed a carton of salt and poured it onto the wood floor of the cabi
n, making a circle. He left an opening for us both to step through then closed it.

  “With this salt I purify our circle,” he said as we sat in front of each other, our knees touching. His hair was still rumpled from my fingers running through it and I scowled at the silver shape twisting around us, feeling cheated.

  Alex grabbed my hands and held them. We both closed our eyes as he invoked earth, air, water, and fire just the way that Grams had showed me.

  “Thanks to the Goddess. Thanks to the God,” Alex said, then squeezed my hand. I took a deep breath and repeated him.

  “God, Goddess I call on you both for strength. Strength in my magic. Strength in my heart. And strength to get through this task and to get back safely to the one you have destined for me.” I gasped as tingling energy sparked between our joined knees and burned its way through my system, warming me with comfort and love. It was amazing.

  “I call on the power of Rebecca Foster that was born into me. Help me to face the evils ahead and give me the wisdom to steer my sails in the right direction. Fill me with energy and light.” He paused when the spirit bounced from the walls screaming and groaning as it filtered through the tiny cabin like smoke.

  He shook his head and closed his eyes and continued.

  “Spirits of evil, unfriendly beings, unwanted guests, be gone. Leave us. Leave this place. Leave this circle that only the Goddess and the God may enter. Go, or be cast into the outer darkness. Go, or be drowned in the watery abyss. Go, or be burned in the flames. Go, or be torn by the whirlwind. By the power of the Mother and God. We banish you. We banish you. We banish you!”

  I could feel every pulse of Alex’s body within mine. With each swell of his lungs and each beat of his heart, mine echoed the rhythm as if we were one being. I could feel his pain for his mother, his fear of what was waiting for him on the other side, the cold, stabbing betrayal he felt for his Aunt. And I was in awe of the love he felt for me. The girl he saw when he looked into my eyes. Brave and beautiful and strong. Wind pushed up towards the timber ceiling, creating a swirl of air and energy that lifted my hair and danced across my face. Blue flames from the surrounding candles leapt into the air, licking the wood planks above us. Then the fragrances came, invading my senses with warmth. The scent of seawater was thick in the air, followed by soft traces of lavender, earth, fresh cut grass, and some flower I couldn’t put my finger on. The energy was rising, coiling around us until it was a swirling mass of light that took my breath away.

  And in an instant it was gone. The sprit was gone. Once again I was alone in myself and I ached for him.

  “Blessed Be.” Alex’s voice was a breathless whisper and when I finally repeated him mine was too.

  I opened my eyes and Alex was looking back at me, his eyes a clouded blue. And I could feel his words before they ever came. I dreaded them. And then his voice was in my ears and ruthless tears were springing to my eyes.

  “It’s time.”

  Chapter 27

  They’ve found me. They know. Rowan, love, if you ever find this. I love you.

  ~ Alexander 1692

  ***

  “Where are you?” I whispered into the dark as I leaned my head out my bedroom window for the hundredth time. It was four in the morning. Alex had walked me back home and promised he’d be quick. There wasn’t much to the actual spell. He’d walked me through it. The problem was he’d have to go back to Marion’s, which was a danger in itself. Marion was no longer family. Marion was the enemy. His book of shadows was still there and he refused to leave it. We’d researched a few see-me-not spells for him to use. He already had most of these mastered, but taught me for my own amusement. Having a high priestess for a mother, these spells were like child’s play for him. I thought about the light in his eyes as he watched me work a simple spell. How amazed we both were at the way the magic spilled out of me like water behind a crumbling dam. I wondered if it were like that for everyone. He promised that if I went to sleep he’d be back by morning. The problem with this was that there was no way I was going to be able to sleep. Especially when I had a bone-deep feeling that something was terribly wrong. Like the universe was out of balance, or the earth was shifting off its axis. Something wasn’t right. I could feel it. I clutched the necklace around my neck, trying to feel some kind of connection to Alex. Something that would tell me he was okay. That he was near. Nothing. Just cold metal lying lifeless against my chest and a sick sensation brewing in my gut.

  At five I heard my grandparents loading their luggage into the truck outside. Their plane wasn’t leaving till eight thirty, but it was a good hour drive to Boston and Grandpa always liked to be early. They didn’t bother to come in and wake me. We had said our goodbyes the day before and I was suddenly thankful. I wasn’t sure I could hold it together long enough to get through another run through of their rules because deep down I knew I was going to have to break half of them. A few minutes after the sound of Grandpa’s truck rumbling away into the distance, Bev was wandering into my room, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

  “What are you doing up?” she asked, falling backwards onto my bed and pulling the comforter up over her. “You’ve been in here pacing for hours.” She lay back, pulling the skin tight around her eyes. “Uggg, I’m going to look like hell tomorrow.” She looked to the clock across the room and groaned. “I mean today.”

  I smiled apologetically. I’d forgotten she was sleeping right next door. I was so used to having the upstairs to myself.

  “Sorry,” I said. “I’m waiting.”

  “On what?” Her voice was muffled against my pillow.

  “Alex. He should have been back by now.” As the words left my mouth I started scrambling under my bed for the book. Noel’s book. If he’d gotten out his name would be gone. If he was safe he wouldn’t be on that list. Right?

  “Back? Did he sleep here?” Bevin sat up, suddenly more alert, her need for gossip outweighing her need for sleep.

  “No.” I started flipping through the pages wishing I had marked the page. God how thick was this book? “Damn it where is it?” A page ripped as I tore through the chapters.

  “But I thought you guys were going to, ya know, do it.” She giggled, leaning forward, waiting for me to spill. “Don’t tell me you chickened out.”

  Anger boiled in my gut at the reminder of how I’d been cheated out of my one perfect moment with him. The memory only fueled my need to find his name gone from this wretched book. Another page ripped as I ignored Bevin and tore through another section. I could barley read through my blurry eyes.

  “Rowan what’s going on?”

  I clutched the book tight and the words jumped off the page as if they were written in flames. A list of accused. And at the bottom…Alexander William Foster. God no. Something’s gone wrong.

  “No. Please no.” God what do I do now? Tell me what to do. Alex had always said he was torn between faiths. That his father was a strict puritan, a man of God. His mother’s faith resided with the Goddess and her elements. Well I needed them both now. I needed to save Alex.

  “Rowan? Talk to me!” Bevin said. In a sudden rush, the words spilled from my mouth before I could stop them, tumbling past my lips in a reckless display of emotion. I told her what Alex was, who he was, where he was from. The witchcraft, the time travel, all of it. Everything that led up to this moment I described in as much detail as possible, fully expecting her to label me as crazy once it was out.

  “Okay.” She closed her eyes and placed her fingers on her temples like she was trying to process the information I’d given her. “One of two things has happened here Rowan.”

  I held my breath and waited for her to reject my theories but prayed that she’d accept them. “It’s true,” I said, watching her.

  “No honey, it’s not.” She opened her eyes and looked sad. I would have been furious with her if I hadn’t been able to feel the swells of concern and love coming off of her like a steady heat. “The way I see it is Alex lied. I mean I’ve
had some whoppers thrown at me before, but this one takes the cake Rowan, seriously.”

  “No,” I said, gritting my teeth. I didn’t have time for this.

  “Rowan listen to me.” She slid to the edge of the bed where I was perched and grabbed my hand. “This is going to sound harsh, but it needs to be said. He was just trying to get in your pants. I know you’ve been through a lot lately, but can’t you see how crazy all this is? I mean, really think about it. It’s either this or–” I cut her off, flashing her a look that could have cut through steel.

  “Or I’m telling the truth.”

  She shook her head. “No. It’s either this or my best friend has completely gone off the deep end. And even after everything that’s happened Rowan, I don’t believe you could be that far gone. So that only leaves option one.”

  “You’re my best friend. You’re supposed to be there no matter what. You are supposed to be the one that believes me when no one else does.” My throat was thick with tears and I swallowed hard to choke back the sobs. I didn’t have time for tears. And I definitely didn’t have the strength for this kind of disappointment. I shoved the book in front of her and pointed to Alex’s name. Her eyes widened for a moment then narrowed in on me.

  “You really believe this?” she said.

  “Yes.”

  “I’ll always be here for you Rowan. No matter how messed up or crazy it sounds. And just for the record, this is incredibly messed up and crazy.” I could tell she wasn’t completely convinced but she was willing to at least entertain the idea to appease me. It was all I could ask for. I was aware of how crazy all this sounded.

  “I know.”

  “So what do we do now? Is there anything really we can do?” She sounded as hopeless as I felt. And then it hit me. Rebecca’s book. If he hadn’t had a chance to dismantle the spell the gateway would still be open. I could go through. The jade stone around my neck thrummed with energy and I knew this was the answer. The only answer.