Dallas Fire & Rescue: Concealing Fire (Kindle Worlds Novella) (Fiery Fairy Tales Book 2)

by Siera London

  “I can see he's quite taken with you.”

  “You just met him today, how can you be so sure?” Even she had her doubts that Cutler would keep her around for the long haul.

  “I have eyes, Kendall. The man is smitten with you. Plus, I heard how much you like him, several times in fact, about an hour ago.”

  Kendall’s breath hitched. “Grandma, I thought you turned your hearing aids down at night.”

  Her grandmother chuckled. “Not when there's a hot guy close by.”

  Kendall rolled over and clicked on the bedside lamp.

  Her grandmother's face held a mischievous grin. “He smells good, too. Like the beach in spring time, a sweet freshness with a salty chaser...yum.”

  “Grandma, I think you might be a little freaky.”

  “Don't say that down at the senior citizens center. I could barely keep them from stealing my thongs when I lived there.”

  Kendall covered her ears. “I can't hear anymore.”

  “Me either after all that ruckus I heard about an hour ago.” She blushed. Being close to Cutler she forgot how to be quiet. Admittedly, it was nice to get out of her own head. One touch of those thick, callused hands swept her troubles under the bed, at least for a few hours.

  “Sorry, grandma. We won't be here very long.”

  A warm hand, gentle and soft, settled atop of hers on the sheet.

  “You can stay, Kendall.”

  She sat up straighter in the bed. “What?”

  “With your parents gone and that horrible marriage over, you don’t have to leave,” she began. “You’re alone there, I’m alone here, but…now you have Cutler and me….” Her grandmother trailed off.

  Kendall wasn’t sure what lay between her and Cutler. She couldn’t go changing her life based on a few days, could she?

  “Grandmother.” She hesitated. How did she tell the matriarch of the family that she was just sexing her co-worker, nothing more?

  Her grandmother must have sensed her uneasiness because she patted her hand and then rolled over, her back to Kendall.

  “I'm happy that you're here. I won’t be staying with you and your man friend. I'll spend a few days at the hotel, so I can visit with Mrs. Elliott. All the seniors have been moved temporarily in the housing tower on Sigsbee Road. It’ll be a two mile commute, instead of eighty.”

  Kendall was happy her grandmother had a friend. Lucky for them she thought. Where would Kendall be once this thing with Cutler was over?

  Chapter Ten

  Cutler ground his molars together. The winds blew off the Atlantic filling his truck with the fresh morning air of spring. The sun filtered through Kendall’s flowing strands, giving them an internal glow. He craved her with an intensity his words and body struggled to communicate, but something was off. Kendall had been ignoring her cell phone calls for more than a week. Interesting, he noticed if the call was from Beck she told him, but when it was from Gordon she either ignored it or clammed up.

  “Who's on the phone, Red?”

  Kendall had become increasingly tense each day the phone calls persisted. What reason did she have for avoiding talking with anyone? He knew about the marriage. He understood and accepted the actions she’d taken to gain her freedom.

  “A friend from home.”

  She didn’t meet his eyes when she spoke.

  “So, it's Gordon,” he growled. Why wouldn’t she come clean with the entire truth of what happened back in Cockrell?

  “Yeah, it was him.”

  “Why aren't you taking his calls?” Had she been sleeping with Gordon once the marriage to Beck went south? He sensed she was still running.

  “Because of you,” she answered.

  He tilted his head from the road to look at her. Her expression was closed, and he didn't want to make her life more difficult.

  “What's going on between you and him?”

  She rolled her eyes. “Cutler, I'm here with you. There's nothing going on with me and another man.”

  “Darlin', when my mother wasn't rolling my old man for money or making him believe she was his one and only, she was cheating on him. You don't have to get physical to wound someone, Kendall.”

  Her tan complexion, paled. “You think I'm cheating on you?”

  Cutler knew he was projecting his childhood issues onto Kendall, but he couldn’t ‘unthink’ the thought.

  “The reason why I never stayed with a woman for long before you was because either, I was gone or she’d be gone before things could go sour. It's different between you and me, Kendall. I want you to stay, but you're hiding something and I don't like it.”

  Her expression looked like she carried a truckload of concrete on her back. “Cutler,” she paused.

  Eyes, normally vibrant green, looked worried as they landed on the leather seats, the center console, everywhere but his face.

  “Gordon thinks there may be something between us.”

  He shot flaming arrows across the small cab. “Another larger than life Texan to contend with, Kendall? Are there any other men you need to tell me about?”

  Kendall flinched.

  He reined in his frustration when she scooted closer to the passenger door. It wasn't her fault she was a woman that men found attractive. He trusted her, but her unconventional methods of handling conflict left him on edge.

  “He's been there for me. I thought...I thought, maybe we would be good together.”

  “So, it was your idea. You've been leading him on?” Cutler roared.

  “No,” she stammered.

  His blood heated to a boil. So, she was playing him. Using Cutler to get rid of her ex-husband so she could go back to the doctor after her two weeks were up.

  “You're lying, Kendall.”

  She turned toward him, tears in her eyes. “I'm not lying. I told Gordon I might be interested in him.”

  She jumped when Cutler banged his hand on the steering wheel.

  “I trusted you,” he ground out.

  “And nothing has changed, Cutler. I promise you. Gordon and I talked about us before I met you.”

  “Then why are you avoiding his calls?”

  A grimace formed on her beautiful face. Dear God, Kendall had manipulated him and probably... Had he been wrong to put his faith in her?

  “I feel guilty for inviting his interest. I knew there was no passion between us, but he made me feel safe.”

  “That's all there is to it?” he questioned, feeling his blood pressure drop to below two hundred.

  “He's been kind to me...I don't want to hurt him.”

  Doubt again crept into his mind.

  “And the pills were all about getting away from Beck, nothing else? You want children, someday?”

  Kendall’s brows furrowed. “Cutler, what are you asking? Beck wanted children. I could never bring a life into a marriage like ours. He threatened that he would divorce me, take everything if I didn’t conceive. So, right or wrong, I created the conditions to make the threat a reality. Beck didn’t think I could be alone after my parents died.” She hadn’t either…at first. “In the end, my freedom was all I wanted. Now do you understand? I can’t hurt Gordon after all he’s done for me.”

  He’d hadn’t known about her parents. A woman, grieving the sudden loss of her family could explain how she’d married a guy like Beck. The revelation was yet another example of why the secrets she harbored had to end.

  “So, you'd rather keep me in the dark?” Cutler left out the fact that she’d ripped a hole in his chest by not trusting him with the truth. Why couldn’t she accept help?

  They drove the rest of the way home in silence.

  “Cutler, please try and understand what it was like for me. I had no one. I need to figure out how to let him down.”

  In other words, she didn’t want or need his input. “Seems like you figured that out real fast with me,” he muttered.

  The hiss that filled the air sucked the oxygen out of the front seat.

  He growled
in frustration, but he held his tongue. In his peripheral vision, he saw her reach for him, then stop shy of actually touching his skin.

  “I'll call him when we get to your house.”

  He didn't care for her tone. It was monochromatic and flat, the opposite of Kendall.

  “Red, I...I want to listen when you talk with him.” What if this guy was another obsessive type?

  “Why? Because you want to control me or you don't trust me to end things with Gordon?”

  Her accusation grated. “No.” He forced himself to stay calm. “I don't trust him or any other non-related man when it comes to you. You're mine.”

  When he pulled the truck up in front of the house and cut the engine, Kendall didn't make a move to get out of the cab.

  “Red?”

  She shook her head like an insect had landed on her and she wanted it gone.

  Angling her body sideways in the passenger seat she faced him, verdant eyes swirling with emotion.

  “When I took this assignment, I told myself two things. One, rebuild the relationship with my Grandma Dinah. I've been a terrible grandchild, infrequent calls, even less frequent visits, but my granny loves me just the same.”

  Cutler thought he might love Kendall, too.

  She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes.

  “The second thing was, I'd focus on the damage done to my career at the hands of my ex-husband.”

  “Those are all worthy goals.” Where was she going with this?

  “I told myself…” She swallowed, “No men.”

  Anxiety gripped his breath. Kendall was the one for him. He'd waited for the ‘but you changed all that for me’, never imagining the woman meant for him would walk into his life. Kendall didn’t say another word. Now that he had her, he couldn't lose her.

  Cutler reacted without considering the impact of his actions. Threading both his hands through her hair, he wrapped the strands around his knuckles and tugged until he looked into her upturned face.

  “I'm not letting you go, Kendall. You're it for me.”

  He felt the shudder in her body, saw the light dim in her eyes.

  “You know, you sound so much like Beck, it's breaking my heart.”

  The words hit him in the chest like the blunt end of a Haligan tool.

  “Kendall, I didn't mean it like that. I’m sorry if—”

  She pulled away from him, eyes hardened with determination, that chin of hers jutted forward like a suit of armor.

  “I think I'll go hang with my grandmother at the senior's center.”

  Though her eyes never left his, the light behind that earthy green had dimmed. In an attempt to avoid being hurt, he’d wounded her. Not sure how to repair the damage, he blurted out the first words that came to mind.

  “I'm sorry, Red, but don’t leave before we can talk this thing out. This whole other man thing is making me a little crazy.”

  Kendall looked aghast at his comment. Damn it, he was making it worse. He knew she was an innocent, her husband had been her first lover and he'd basically accused her of being a whore. Before Cutler could regroup, she had the door open and was climbing down from the cab.

  “I'll be back to get my things.”

  The last thing Cutler heard was the door slam. What had he done? More importantly, how would he get the woman that held his heart back home…permanently?

  ***

  Kendall refused to let the tears fall. The moment her grandmother’s yellow Mustang convertible pulled onto Roosevelt Boulevard headed south, Kendall started packing up her memories of Cutler to seal away in one of those all-purpose, vacuum seal bags. Dinah watched the road with her left eye and Kendall with the right. A parade of scooters and premium collection rental cars whizzed by them. Her grandmother didn’t seem to notice; used to the tourist congestion on the roadways. As they drew closer to the senior center, Kendall’s heartbeat grew a little quieter. As she had done so many times in the past, she dug deep into her core strength and found…she’d hit the bottom. Dear heaven, she felt the walls start to shake. Cracks opened, geysers shot from her foundation, she was falling apart. She loved Cutler, but now it was over. She had fooled herself into believing he could accept her once he knew the truth.

  “Kendall.” Her grandmother’s voice was gentle.

  “Ma’am.” It felt good not to be alone, but she wanted…no, she chided herself. It would not have worked with Cutler in the long-term. Did she want forever?

  “Why are you leaving him when it’s obvious you don’t want to?”

  She drew in a shuddered breath, determined to get the words out.

  “We…he...” Say it she demanded of the heartbroken woman threatening to leap from her chest and run back home…to Cutler. “Cutler needs something I can’t give him.”

  Her grandmother clucked her tongue. “Nonsense. You’re a Raine. You descend from generations of competent and capable women. Women who celebrated their womanhood, rather than try to hide it. Women who valued a man strong enough to admit when he’s wrong.”

  Kendall lowered her head, not wanting to reveal her thoughts. Maybe the competent and capable gene had skipped a few generations. “Cutler doesn’t trust me, Grandma.”

  They reached the designated visitor’s lot for the senior center. When her grandmother cut the engine, she didn’t exit the car. Kendall looked down at the last remaining member of her family. Grateful that she would have this connection when she left in three days.

  All at once, her grandmother appeared to have aged twenty-years, her skin shallow and drawn. “Are you okay?” Kendall asked.

  “Yes, I was thinking about what you said.”

  Kendall twisted in her seat to retrieve the picnic basket loaded with fresh baked mango bread, raspberry scones, and apple danish for Mrs. Elliott.

  A two-story apartment building housed the seniors until the village could be rebuilt. The cause of the fire was still under investigation, but arson was suspected. The first floor held a cafeteria and an activity room that led to a rear courtyard. A cluster of three smaller structures designated for administrators, therapists, and maintenance flanked the palmed oasis forming a perfect square. The staff and visitors used a network of porticos to transit the grounds.

  “Don’t bother yourself with my drama, I’ll figure it out.”

  Her grandmother raised her head, dark brown eyes seasoned with wisdom regarded her.

  “Will you figure out that you demand trust you are incapable of giving? Her grandmother’s head tipped up, the long braid, draped in front of her shoulder. “These decisions to isolate yourself leave you vulnerable. You’re choosing to put yourself at risk again. ”

  Kendall’s grip fell slack around the handle. The word again punched her in the gut. How many times would she have to hear that word, from herself and others?

  “That’s not true.”

  “When your parents died—”

  Kendall held up both hands, palms facing Dinah. “I don’t want to talk about them.”

  “Because your mother—”

  “It was another one of Mom’s ideas for them to volunteer their time,” Kendall hurled the accusation. “She couldn’t get herself out of the youth center when it caught fire, so Dad…” Kendall’s voice cracked. “So Dad had to try and save her.”

  Small hands gripped her shoulders, shaking her.

  “Your father made a choice to save the woman he loved.” Gone was Dinah’s gentle tone. This voice was coated in steel.

  “But, he failed,” Kendall sobbed. She’d lost both her parents that day.

  “No, Kendall, he didn’t. He got those kids, himself, and your mom out of that building.”

  Kendall dried her eyes. “They died due to their injuries. I don’t want help that puts other people at risk. I can take care of myself.”

  Her grandmother released her. “You refuse any offer of assistance, Kendall.” The look she gave bore pity. “From your family and friends, and certainly on the job.”

  “Grandma,
how can you say that?”

  “Because, I’m too old to lie to myself about who you really are. You never trusted me to help you when you ran into trouble with your marriage. Cutler loves you. You love him, yet you don’t trust him enough to tell the man what you need or how he can help you.”

  Tears spilled down cheeks lined with age, a lifetime of love, and concern. “Think of the fear and how helpless your parents must have felt knowing they would never see you again. The pain I live with knowing my only grandchild won’t confide in me or come home when she feels lost in this world.”

  Kendall’s defenses crumbled. How had she hurt the people she cared about most, when she only sought to protect them? Her impulsiveness had led to so many poor decisions, she wanted to shield…not isolate them.

  Her grandmother took the basket from her hands.

  “Maybe it’s you who can’t accept the woman in the mirror, not Cutler. Mrs. Elliott is waiting. Come inside when you’re ready.” Dinah slammed the door, leaving Kendall alone with her guilt and shame.

  Was she ready to come in out of the rain? Could she allow the people that cared about her to help?

  Preoccupied with the husband who’d failed her and the authorities that never came to her rescue, Kendall hadn’t considered how she’d hurt her grandmother and Cutler by not sharing her feelings and refusing their help. In her selfish quest for self-reliance, she had proven her lack of faith in them both. She wanted to be like the Raine women before her, capable and competent, in every aspect of her life because…she loved Cutler. Her heart beat faster at the admission. The crazy man was direct and confident and…he wanted her, unconditionally. She could be fearless and declare to him how she felt. Was it too late to for her to make amends?

  Kendall reached Mrs. Elliott’s apartment, her backpack over one shoulder. The floral wreath on the door obscured the unit number. Knocking, she waited as her thoughts settled on Cutler’s face when she’d gotten out of his truck. Raised voices on the other side of the door grabbed her attention.

  “You stay away from me. What have you done with my friend?”

  That was her grandmother’s voice. Kendall tried the knob. The door opened just in time for her to see Dinah head-butt a woman approximately Kendall’s same height with bright red hair. Seconds later, her grandmother crumpled to the tiled floor.