Why You Shouldn't Lend A Bad Boy Your Clothes

by Philline Harms

  Hunter’s eyes grew even wider, and he stammered, “I…yeah. The pregnancy thing. You…you still want to see me?”

  The look of tentative hope in his eyes was enough to make me cross the small distance between us. I touched his face and said with a smile, “I have news.”

  Hunter blinked at me in bewilderment. “You…do?”

  “The child isn’t yours.”

  “What do you mean it’s not mine?”

  “It’s Sean’s.” When he just stared at me in shock, I pressed a short kiss to the side of his jaw. Unable to hold back a relieved chuckle, I said, “Everything’s fine, Hunter. It’s not yours. We’re okay.”

  For a moment, Hunter looked like he was about to cry. Then a smile that could’ve outshone the sun formed on his face as he quietly repeated, more to himself than me, “We’re okay. We’re really okay.”

  Before I could answer, he pulled me into a bone-crushing hug and dragged me inside, finally shutting the door behind us.

  I could feel his heart racing against my chest as he buried his face against my shoulder. He was trembling beneath my hands, every inch of him shaking, while his fingers clung to the back of my shirt.

  After minutes of me whispering reassurances and holding onto him, he leaned back just enough to be able to see my face. “I really want to kiss you right now.”

  “Then why don’t you already?” I shot back with a grin.

  Hunter didn’t need to be asked twice. The next thing I knew was that I was being pushed back against the door, Hunter’s hand cradling my chin while the other was running through my hair.

  I felt my knees getting weak as his teeth scraped over my bottom lip and his tongue found its way into my mouth. My hands instinctively locked behind his neck to keep my legs from giving away under me.

  Hunter didn’t care. Instead, he made things even worse when he hooked a cold finger under my chin and turned my head slightly to give him better access to my neck. He smiled up at me before he lowered his lips to the sensitive skin right over my collarbone.

  “Not where anyone can see,” I said as my head fell back against the door.

  Instead of answering, Hunter kissed his way down my neck. Only when he arrived at the collar of my hoodie, he hesitated.

  “Can I—”

  “Yes.”

  “I missed this,” he said and pulled the collar of the hoodie down a little so he could get to work there. His eyes were dark when he looked up at me through long lashes while his hands held me in place against the door.

  At that moment, I was completely sure there wasn’t a single person as beautiful as him.

  After a while, he began sucking long enough for bruises to form on my skin. One of my hands dropped into his hair as my eyes fell shut.

  “You’re so pretty,” Hunter said softly against my skin, the movement of his lips sending shivers down my spine.

  “Not like this.”

  “Especially like this.”

  I shook my head and leaned it against the door.

  “What is it?” Hunter asked with a concerned frown and brushed some stray hairs that were sticking to my sweaty forehead away.

  “I just…” I began but broke off when I didn’t know how to say it.

  How could I possibly describe the feeling of the warmth in my stomach? Or the fluttering in my chest whenever I looked at him?

  “I think I might love you a lot.”

  A smile twitched around his mouth before he pressed another short kiss to my lips. “I think I might love you more.”

  After a second, I grimaced and fell back against the door. “We’re one of those couples now, aren’t we?”

  “Shit. I think we are,” Hunter murmured before he broke into laughter. Then he asked, “Wanna take this to my room? It’s a little uncomfortable in this corridor.”

  I chuckled and let him pull me to my feet and up the stairs to his room where we both collapsed onto his bed.

  Hunter reached over to the speaker on his nightstand and turned on a song I didn’t know. Then he settled back against the headboard and wrapped an arm around me while I rested my head on his chest.

  The warmth of him beneath me, his hand lightly caressing my cheek and the calm, dreamy song were enough to make me feel as comfortable as I hadn’t felt in weeks.

  “I can’t believe this is happening,” Hunter uttered after a few minutes.

  “What?”

  He waved his hand around, indicating the two of us. “This. That I don’t have to worry about being a father just yet. That you’re here. That you don’t hate me.”

  “I could never hate you.”

  Hunter took my hand and guided it to his lips to press a short kiss to my knuckles. Still, the look in his eyes showed that he was a hundred miles away.

  I rolled over a little so that I was full-on lying on his chest and grabbed his chin in one hand. Once I turned his face to look at me, I asked, “What is it?”

  “Nothing,” he said and leaned down to kiss me, but I pulled back and glared half-heartedly at him.

  “Stop trying to distract me!” I huffed. “You look sad, and I want to know why. Talk to me.”

  “I don’t want to ruin the mood.”

  “You’re not.” I insisted. “I know you, Hunter. I can tell when you’re upset. I don’t care what it is, just tell me.”

  Hunter studied my face for a few seconds. Then he said, “I was thinking about prom. That’s all.”

  I quirked a brow in surprise. “What about it?”

  “It’s just…” He let out a long breath. “Everyone else will go there together. Liam and Emily, Alex and Nate. But we? We can’t. We can’t just go there and dance and drink and be stupid like everyone else.”

  I averted my gaze, swallowing hard. Of course, I had thought about it. Still, it was hard to hear it from him, knowing that it was hurting him just as much.

  Then I firmly said, “We don’t need a stupid prom.”

  Hunter looked at me questioningly when I got off the bed and turned the music up.

  Smiling awkwardly at him, I bowed and held a hand out. “May I have this dance?”

  Hunter sat up, a grin forming on his face, and slipped his hand into mine. “I’d be flattered.”

  I didn’t really know what to do next. I had never danced with a guy. In fact, I hadn’t really danced with anyone up to this point.

  Hunter took notice of my uncertainty and pulled me close without hesitation. He placed both hands on my hips, so I slung my arms around his neck.

  At first, it couldn’t honestly be called dancing. I was nervous and clumsy, almost stepping onto his feet a few times. Luckily, he was way better at this than I was and quickly took the lead until we were somewhat moving to the slow rhythm filling the room.

  “This was a better idea in my head.” I admitted, feeling my cheeks heat up.

  Hunter laughed lightly and spun me around, only to send me tumbling against his chest and clinging to his shoulders to stop myself from losing my balance. “I think this is a fantastic idea, sugarpie.”

  “Oh, that nickname is back.” I snickered. “I thought it was outdated?”

  “It’s still good to make you blush,” Hunter smirked and placed a butterfly kiss to my temple.

  “I take back what I said. I definitely hate you.”

  Hunter held even tighter onto me and leaned down. Expecting a kiss, I got onto my toes, but he stopped before our lips collided, hovering just inches away from me. Before I could complain, he murmured, “Somehow I don’t quite believe you.”

  “Stop being a dick.” I groaned, and sneaking a hand to his neck, I dragged his face down and crashed my lips onto his.

  The kiss didn’t last very long. The shrill ringing of the doorbell interrupted us. Hunter groaned in irritation and reluctantly let go of me when the ringing didn’t stop.

  Whoever was at the door seemed to be of rather a short temper.

  “Wait here. I’ll get it,” he said and hurried down the stairs.


  I flopped back onto his bed and hummed quietly to the music but immediately got to my feet when I heard a loud bang and shouting voices.

  “You can’t see him. Listen, I’m—”

  “Shut the fuck up before I—”

  I was on my feet at lightning speed and almost fell down the stairs in my hurry to get to the front door. I slithered to a stop there just in time to be able to throw myself between them as my father raised his fist for a punch.

  “Dad, no!” I screamed and pushed Hunter behind me.

  “There you are, you little bastard,” my father growled and gripped onto the front of my shirt. The smell coming from him was strong enough for me to know he was drunk. “Did you really think I wouldn’t find out you’re hiding here? Do you think I’m stupid?”

  With every word, he shook me, making my teeth clatter.

  “No, I—”

  “Shut your fucking mouth. I don’t want to hear a sound from you,” he said.

  I flinched and immediately fell quiet.

  Hunter apparently lacked those survival instincts, as he now said, “You can’t do this. He didn’t even do anything wrong. He just—”

  “Quiet,” my father spat. “Or I’ll break your fucking nose.”

  “It’s fine,” I said frantically, looking over at Hunter. “It’s fine. I’m coming with you.”

  My father stared at Hunter for a few more seconds before he nodded shortly.

  I suppressed a whimper when he buried a hand in my hair and dragged me out of the door by it. All I could do was claw at his hand and try to keep up with him as he forced me over to the car.

  Once I was roughly shoved onto the passenger seat, he got in next to me and let the engine roar.

  The last thing I saw when I looked back was Hunter standing in the doorway, pressing one hand to his mouth as he started to cry.

  Chapter 37

  Years ago, after Luke’s death, I had worked out a secret that had helped me ever since: Crying is easiest in the shower. Tears mix with the water. Sobs get drowned out by the noise, and red eyes are easily explained by saying you got shampoo in them.

  By now, my parents probably thought I was too stupid to handle a bottle of conditioner.

  A week had passed since my father found me at Hunter’s and dragged me home. As soon as he brought me inside, I ignored my mother’s crying and locked myself in the bathroom.

  Before my dad took my phone, I managed to call Alexis, asking her to go to Hunter’s and check on him. After a few concerned questions, she had hung up with the promise to go there and stay for as long as he needed her.

  I hadn’t talked to her or him since then. There was just no way I could.

  My dad was spending his nights on the couch in the living room downstairs to make sure I didn’t leave the house at nights, though I wasn’t completely sure if it was just that or if he just didn’t want to sleep in a bed with Mom.

  Over the past week, I noticed just how distant they were acting around each other, barely talking, and if they did, it was in short sentences and usually just about Maya or their jobs.

  In addition to all of it, my parents drove me to school and picked me up every day to make sure I wasn’t meeting anyone afterward. I tried to talk to Hunter at school on Wednesday, but I had barely been able to say hello before Victoria popped up out of nowhere.

  That evening, Dad called the local priest and signed me up for Church Camp, which was starting in two weeks. There wasn’t anything I could do about it. All that was left for me to do was cry when my parents didn’t look and put on a strong facade when they did.

  Knocks on the bathroom door ripped me out of my thoughts.

  “What is taking you so long in there, Juley?” my mom called.

  “Just…just a second.” I gasped and got up into a standing position from where I had been kneeling on the shower floor.

  I hadn’t even noticed, but by the time I turned the water off, it was ice-cold already. My teeth were chattering when I wrapped a towel around me and got into boxers and my pants.

  My eyes were staring back at me blearily and red when I finally dared to look into the mirror. I immediately glanced away, took a shaky breath, and pulled a shirt over my head.

  My mother was still standing next to the door when I left the bathroom.

  I ignored her hand on my shoulder and pushed past her instead. “Can you please drive me to work?” I asked quietly without looking at her. “I can’t miss another shift. I need the money.”

  “What for, Juley?” Mom wanted to know. “You know we always support you.”

  I turned around and stared blankly at her. Then, in lack of anything to reply to that, I just shook my head and headed towards my room. But before I could close the door behind me, her foot blocked it and she pushed into my room with a small smile.

  “Of course, I’ll drive you if that’s what you want, baby. Just promise me: No breaking of the rules.”

  “Hunter won’t be there,” I said tonelessly. “Victoria likes to spend her afternoons there.”

  Mom’s face lit up with relief at that. “Come on then. Let’s get there in time for your shift.”

  I nodded silently and followed her into the car. Maya was sitting in the back seat, so I slid in beside her instead of choosing the passenger seat.

  “Hey, Maya.”

  She looked at me with big eyes. “Juley, why are you sad?” she asked and reached for me, but her seatbelt held her arm back. She grimaced in frustration and dropped her hand back into her lap.

  “I’m okay,” I whispered and tried to force a smile on my face. Instead, I felt tears pricking in my eyes and averted my gaze before she could see them.

  “Mommy, Juley is sad. You need to give him a hug,” Maya said seriously and kicked the back of my mother’s seat. “Hugs make people less sad.”

  “It’s okay, Maya. I don’t want a hug from Mom.”

  “Do you want a hug from me?” Maya inquired. Her eyes were wide with concern as she stretched her arms out as far as possible.

  I looked at her little round face before I leaned over and hugged her small frame back.

  “Oh no,” Maya said after a moment. I let go of her in confusion. She patted her shoulder with a sad pout. “I’m not a good enough hugger! Mommy, Juley is crying!”

  I stared at the wet spot on her shirt and quickly wiped over my eyes with the back of my hand.

  Mom looked at me with sad eyes through the rearview mirror. “Please, Jules. Not in front of your sister. She will just worry about you.”

  “That would be a first, right?” I asked and suppressed a bitter laugh. I knew that if I started laughing now, hysteria wouldn’t let me stop. “Someone in my family worrying about me.”

  I could see my mom wince before she averted her eyes shamefully.

  “Why are you sad?” Maya whispered to me.

  For a moment, I searched for the right words to say. Then I quietly muttered, “I just…really miss someone I love very much.”

  “Who do you miss?”

  “His name is—”

  “We’re here.” My mother cut in before I could say his name. “I will pick you up in three hours.”

  I glared at her but climbed out of the car without protest. Every minute away from my parents was a good one, I just hated that it kept me away from Maya.

  The doorbell jingled when I entered Starbucks, making Darryl look over at me. He came out from behind the counter as soon as he saw me.

  “Jules, are you okay?” he asked with one hand resting on my shoulder.

  “I’m fine.” I lied. “Sorry that I missed my last shifts. My parents wouldn’t drive me here.”

  “Don’t worry about it. Jade stepped in for you. She was worried out of her mind when you didn’t come, though. She’s in my office right now, so maybe say hi so she knows you’re alright.”

  “I will. I’m really sorry. It won’t happen again.”

  “I don’t care if you cut some hours. I just need to know
you’re alright,” Darryl said seriously.

  I couldn’t stand the look of concern in his eyes, so I trained my eyes on my shoes instead. “I’m alright. I promise.”

  Darryl looked at me for a long moment before he squeezed my shoulder. “If you say so. I’m here if you need to talk though.”

  I smiled timidly at him before I walked past him and knocked at the door to his office.

  Red ripped the door open before my second knock. She wouldn’t even let me say anything but pulled me into a bone-crushing hug.

  “Screw you, J,” she muttered against my shoulder. “Hunter told me what happened. Do you have any idea how worried I was?”

  “I’m sorry.” I wheezed when she finally let go of me. “I wanted to come, really.”

  “If you apologize one more time, I’m going to kill you,” she said sternly. “Now give me your mobile.”

  I stared at her in confusion. “What do you need my phone for?”

  Even though her words were harsh, her eyes were looking at me with warmth and worry I had never seen on her before.

  “I’m going to save my number in your contacts so that the next time something happens, you call me. I don’t want to have any of your ‘I’m okay’ crap. I want you to call me so I can help. So, give me your phone.”

  I handed it over wordlessly.

  For a second, the only sound was the clicking of her black acrylic nails against the buttons. Then she asked, “Hey, do you have any photos of us on your phone I can use as a profile picture for my contact? I want you to actually find it when you’re looking for my number.”

  “Yeah, there are a few selfies if you go back in my gallery, I think,” I said.

  She nodded as she began scrolling through my photos. Then she looked up at me with a frown. “Why do you have weird stalker pictures of your parents getting it on?”

  “I…what?” I asked and snatched the phone out of her hand to have a look.

  My jaw dropped when I saw the picture. “Oh my God. Oh my God!” I exclaimed and waved the display around in front of her eyes frantically. “I remember this! Oh my God!”

  “What is it? J, you’re acting crazy,” Red said in bewilderment.