LOL #3 Romantic Comedy Anthology

by Anthology

  “Chill out, Bella.” Elaine’s eyes flicked around the table before returning to mine. “No one is paying attention to you.” A wicked little grin lit up her face. “But if they had been, they’d have seen you completely eye-fucking that guy.”

  “Shut up.” I reached under the table to pinch her leg, her grin only growing. “You know I think that expression is gross.”

  Elaine rolled her eyes. “You’re ridiculous, you know that? You think you’re actually going to hook up with this guy when you can’t even handle hearing the words ‘eye-fuck.’”

  “There are children here!” I gestured around the table. Finally Elaine looked abashed—or as abashed as Elaine ever got.

  “No one heard me.”

  Luckily, she was right. The kids we had been hired to help look after were either sleeping in the arms of various parents or working their way through sticky desserts while the grown-ups mostly ignored them in favor of focusing on their wine glasses and adult conversation. We were basically off the hook, for now at least.

  And I was grateful for it. It had been a long day, looking after six kids. The oldest, Danny, was about as hyperactive a kid as I had ever seen, eager to do every single thing the resort offered, from sledding to snowboarding lessons to playing at the arcade in the main lodge. His little sister, Maggie, was easier to deal with. She was in a mommy phase, according to her own mother, and merely wanted to stand at the side of whoever was holding one of the babies, waiting for her turn to help. The babies in question—Finn, Will, Lucy, and Mia—were adorable but kept our hands more than full.

  It was worth it, though. We’d only been here for a few days and I was already pretty sure that it was the best job I’d ever had.

  When my cousin Kiki first called to ask if I wanted to come on this trip, I hadn’t been sure what to expect. Or, to be honest, what she was even asking me—Kiki had a tendency of talking really, really fast when she was excited. And pretty much everything made her excited.

  In this case, for once, I agreed with her on the excitement level. When I finally managed to glean the purpose of her call—several of her friends were going away to celebrate a joint bachelor/bachelorette-party-turned-week-long-getaway before Annie Duncan’s wedding and they needed help with childcare—I was pretty stoked. The chance to go stay in some posh villa at a ski lodge with an honest to God famous actress—that would be Annie—was excitement-worthy in my book. Maybe not Kiki levels of excitement, but what was, really? Even if I would be working, helping to take care of six kids so the couples could relax and enjoy themselves, I still jumped at it.

  Because Finn and Will were only newborns and their mothers, Annie and Ginny, had declared that they had no intention of spending the week with a baby constantly hanging off of them, Kiki had also asked my friend Elaine to join us. We were now happily spending our school break in a luxurious villa, dining in fancy restaurants at the resort, playing with fat babies, and getting paid quite handsomely for it.

  “Here are those refills.”

  I jumped in my seat, knocking my knife off my plate in a loud clatter. I’d been so busy making sure the table hadn’t overheard Elaine that I didn’t notice the reappearance of Scott. He just had to lean over my shoulder to pass out the drinks, close enough to touch, and apparently close enough to turn me into a jumpy, nervous mess.

  “Sorry about that,” he said, grinning down at me with a smile so perfect I felt my breath catch. I knew I was blushing by this point, and could just make out Elaine’s smirk from the corner of my eye. I busied myself with looking down at my plate like a complete loser, way too embarrassed to meet his eyes again.

  This whole seducing him thing is going to go really well, I thought.

  After he finished handing out the drinks, I felt him hesitate at my side, my entire body tensing up at the nearness of him. He was so tall—that was the first thing I had noticed about him when we’d first dined here. And he had broad shoulders and the most gorgeous, wavy black hair that I just want to run my fingers through—

  Hair that was suddenly at my eye level. What the hell?

  “Here you go,” he said, crouching next to me. I gaped at him for a long moment, completely speechless. This was the closest I’d ever been to his face and God, it was beautiful. All square-jawed and blue-eyed, with the longest eyelashes and a smile that could go from almost shy to downright sexy in two seconds flat.

  A smile that now faltered a little. “Your knife?”

  I finally realized what had caused him to kneel at my side—he was retrieving my fallen knife. The guy is trying to help you out, I thought, and you’re gaping at him like a dying fish.

  “Thank… thank you,” I stuttered, reaching for the knife and somehow managing to also knock my entire plate—thank God and all his baby angels it was empty—onto the floor as well. Holy shit.

  But Scott’s smile only grew. “You’re having a bit of a rough time there, huh?”

  Elaine stomped on my foot under the table, no doubt wishing she could make a joke about Scott giving me a rough time, hahaha, and I cursed her silently in my head. “Sorry,” I told him as he handed me the plate, wishing the floor would open up and swallow me.

  But then the strangest thing happened. He shifted his hold on the plate just slightly, bringing his fingertips closer to mine, close enough to brush them lightly, not letting go for a long beat. His eyes, which a moment ago had been twinkly, almost flirty, were steady on mine, now calm and kind. Soothing, almost. And just like that I didn’t feel embarrassed anymore.

  “It’s not problem.”

  He finally released the plate into my hands, which I’m pretty sure were straight-up trembling now, and stood. “Anyone else need anything?” he asked the table while I ducked my head to cover the blush.

  “How we doing on wine, Jen?” Annie asked.

  “We’re half-full.”

  “Forget that,” Annie muttered. “We’ll take another bottle.”

  “You do know that your baby will be walking up for his own bottle in a few hours,” her soon-to-be husband Nate said.

  “That’s what daddies are for,” she replied happily, and everyone laughed.

  Back at our end of the table, Elaine leaned into me. “Wow. That was kind of intense.”

  “What?”

  She tapped on my knee until I looked up at her face. She was grinning again. “Don’t tell me you didn’t see the way he was looking at you.”

  So she had noticed it, too. That meant I wasn’t imagining it, right?

  “I saw it too,” Annie said casually from a few seats away. My head snapped up in her direction, praying that she was talking to Nate or one of the girls. But her eyes were directly on mine. And she was smiling. “Guy is totally into you. And he’s cute.”

  “Really cute,” Ginny added from the other side of the table. Oh, God. This could not be happening. I could not talk to them about this.

  “Definitely.” Annie winked at me, apparently not noticing that my face was quite literally on fire. “If I was a few years younger I might go for him myself.”

  “And, you know, not about to be married,” Nate added drily. Annie patted his arm condescendingly.

  “Of course, dear.”

  “Bella has totally been crushing on him since we got here,” Elaine told the table at large and I decided that my new goal was not to get laid but rather to commit murder. My only hope of getting out of this was that my cousin appeared to be focusing entirely feeding Mia mashed up berries from her spoon at the far end of the table. Because if Kiki was paying attention—

  “You have?” she squealed, looking up from baby Mia. “Bella! Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Shh,” I pleaded, gaze flying across the restaurant, praying that Scott was back in the kitchen.

  But once you got Kiki started, there wasn’t really any turning back. “Oh my gosh, this is so awesome! Bella! We haven’t had any boy talk in years!”

  “And we’re not going to have it here,” I hissed.
/>   There were so many things about this situation that were making me wish I would have gotten in a terrible snowmobiling accident this afternoon. I was pretty damn shy under the best of circumstances—like, almost to the point of it being debilitating. I hated having people look at me, hating being anywhere in the vicinity of the center of attention. It wasn’t really surprising, considering the way I normally dealt with attention, that I was still single and a virgin.

  So this conversation would have sucked at any point, but to have it here, in front of these women who I looked up to so much, in front of their husbands, within feet of Scott, was a special kind of torture.

  Oh, God. Ohgodohgod. This was so bad.

  It was Jen who came to my rescue, apparently sensing how close to a freak out I was. “Let’s change the subject,” she said, passing the half-empty bottle of wine to me with a wink. “Boy talk is much better when boys aren’t present. So.” She looked around the table. “What’s on the agenda for tomorrow?”

  I was so grateful to her I could hug her—and hugging is something I rarely did. Another symptom of that whole too-shy-to-function thing. So instead I took deep breaths through my nose while everyone discussed their plans for tomorrow.

  “You’re all going to fall through the ice and drown,” Ginny said dismissively, swirling the wine in her glass.

  “How dare you?” her husband Josh replied, his face the picture of mock-outrage. “We are men. Men go ice fishing.”

  “That’s right,” Nate added. “Manly men.” He turned to Annie. “Right, baby?”

  “Don’t worry, Gin,” Annie said, eyebrows raised. “They’ll have Matt with them. He’ll keep them from drowning.”

  “You know,” Nate said, crossing his arms. “I resent that insinuation. I really do.”

  “Oh, that’s right.” Annie was giggling now, so hard she almost couldn’t get the words out. “I forgot that we were dealing with a literal boy scout.”

  Normally I would have enjoyed this banter between the couples. I’d been fascinated by their relationships, so different from my parents’, since we arrived. They weren’t cold to each other, didn’t spend the majority of their time talking about money or committee meetings or connections. They seemed to actually enjoy each other. Of course, I had seen this kind of interaction with Kiki and her husband, Eric, but it was so different from what I saw at home that I thought it must be an anomaly. So I’d been watching the girls interact with their guys all week, fascinated by it.

  Tonight, I could hardly hear them. It was becoming completely obvious to me that I had been living a major fantasy, thinking I might actually hook up with someone this week. I couldn’t even deal with people talking about him, couldn’t deal with a two second interaction without knocking over flatware. How on earth did I think I would ever get him—or any guy—to give me the time of day?

  It was the same problem I had always had. Too shy. Too timid. Too scared.

  When Scott reappeared with the wine bottle at the opposite side of the table, I didn’t know if I was relieved or disappointed. Maybe Elaine and I had both imagined the look from before—he didn’t seem all that eager to come anywhere near me now.

  Just when Scott uncorked the bottle, little Will woke up in Josh’s arms with a shriek. “You’re okay, baby,” Ginny soothed, leaning over her husband’s shoulder to rub Will’s back. But Will appeared in no mood to be soothed. He continued to cry bloody murder, attracting the attention of several nearby diners.

  “Shoot,” Ginny muttered, glancing at her watch. “We took longer than I thought. He’s probably hungry.”

  “Let’s head back,” Josh said, trying to reach, one-handed, for his wallet. “You guys stay, enjoy the wine.”

  “Put your money away,” Annie said firmly. “We’ve got this.”

  “Annie—”

  Will’s increasing screams put an end to the argument. “You can buy my fiancé a flannel shirt after he falls in the water tomorrow,” Annie suggested drily as Ginny and Josh started to round up their kids.

  “You know, she’s getting a little fussy, too,” Jen pointed out, adjusting half-asleep Lucy in her arms. As if in response, Lucy whimpered, wiping her tired eyes. “We’ll join you.”

  “Let’s just all go,” Nate suggested. He looked up at Scott. “Can you bill the room?”

  “Of course, sir.”

  I did my best to avoid his gaze as we stood, gathering jackets and purses and corralling the kids. Elaine took Will from Josh so he could help Maggie with her coat. Without a baby to hold, I reached for Danny’s hand but he crossed his arms and gave me a look that clearly said, “Do I look like I need my hand held?”

  I didn’t look back at Scott until we reached the door to the restaurant. He was slipping his tip into apron pocket, his mind on his work or his money, whatever moment we might have shared a distant memory—if it had even registered with him. Typical, loser Bella, I thought to myself, following the rest of the group to the lobby.

  “Oh, crud,” Elaine said, stopping in front of me. “I left my phone.” She lifted Will slightly, indicating her full arms. “Will you go grab it?”

  “Sure. You guys go ahead, I’ll meet you there.”

  She nodded. Was that a hint of a smile on her face?

  I headed back to the dining room, hoping that the busboy hadn’t somehow cleared the table in the last thirty seconds.

  He hadn’t, but my relief was short lived. Because still standing at the table, phone in his hand, was Scott.

  His face lit up when he saw me. “Bella. I was hoping you would notice it was missing before you got too far.”

  I was so flabbergasted that he knew my name I couldn’t even respond. Definitely keep standing here like a deranged mime. Real attractive, Bella.

  “Thanks. It’s Elaine’s actually. Um. My friend, Elaine?”

  If he thought my stammering made me sound like a nut job he didn’t say so, merely smiled at me as he handed the phone over. Again, our fingers brushed. This time, I felt a little spark there, where our skin met.

  And then he took a step closer.

  “Actually, I was thinking if you didn’t come back for it, I would have no choice but to go to the front desk and see if they could tell me how to reach you.”

  “How to… ” I swallowed, my throat very dry. “How to reach me?”

  He nodded. His smile slipped away though his face remained friendly. His eyes took on that calm look again and it occurred to me that he might sense how nervous I was, that he was trying to help me relax.

  Somehow the idea that he might be that thoughtful made me feel better immediately.

  “I guess now you don’t have to,” I said.

  Holy crap. Did I just say that? It sounded almost… flirty.

  Scott grinned again. “Lucky me.” Another step closer. “What do you think about having dinner tomorrow? There’s a really nice cafe on the property.” He gestured around the dining room. “Not quite as fancy as this, but the food is good.”

  My brain, still rejoicing over how close he was standing, took a minute to catch up to the fact that he just asked me out.

  He just asked me out.

  “That sounds great,” I blurted, before my brain could catch up and start worrying. “I mean… I’m not sure what time. I’m a nanny and—”

  “I figured. You’re really good with those kids.”

  The idea that he’d been watching me enough to judge my interaction with the kids—hell, he knew my name!—had my heart thudding wildly in my chest.

  “Thanks. They’re great. The kids, I mean. The kids are great.”

  He looked like he maybe wanted to laugh but he restrained himself. “That’s good. I don’t think I could handle a bunch of little kids if they were brats.”

  I giggled, actually giggled, growing more shocked with myself by the minute.

  “Why don’t I call you tomorrow? Then you can tell me when you think you’ll be free.”

  He’s going to call me. On the phone! I was
fully aware that my brain had taken on the mental capacity of a thirteen-year-old with her first crush but I didn’t care. “That would be great.”

  He pulled a phone from his apron pocket and handed it to me. “Put your number in.”

  I typed my cell number with fingers that barely trembled before handing it back. He quickly typed something before looking up and grinning at me. “I just texted you. Now you have my number, too.”

  It took everything I had not to pull out my phone to read the text right there in front of him. Instead, I did my best to smile and keep my mouth shut. I had the strangest urge to let out a Kiki-level squeal and I was determined not to embarrass myself any more.

  “So.” His eyes flicked over my face. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow?”

  I nodded, unable to tear my gaze away from his blue eyes. “Tomorrow.”

  We stood like that, staring at each other, until he finally cleared his throat. “Well, I should get back to work.”

  “Oh, yeah. Work. Right.”

  He grinned and then leaned forward, pressing his lips to my cheek. I was blushing so hard I was sure my skin must have felt hot to him, but he merely smiled, said goodnight, and headed across the room to another table. As soon as his attention was diverted I glanced down at my phone. There was a new text there.

  Hopefully you won’t throw any more plates at me tomorrow.

  I snorted, slapping a hand over my mouth before looking to make sure he hadn’t heard me. Of course he had. He winked from across the room and I waved, feeling embarrassed but giddy, and got the hell out of there.

  Maybe there was hope for me yet.

  Chapter Two

  By three o’clock the next afternoon, the girls were pretty much blitzed. I wished I could join them. Getting drunk off my ass sounded like a fantastic option.

  My date with Scott was a go. He’d texted me earlier and asked if I knew when I might be free. Though I had been waiting to hear from him since the moment I walked out of the dining room the night before, the text still sent me running to Elaine, completely freaked out.