The Woman They Kept

by Krause, Andrew

  “Are you okay?” she said, grabbing Leanin's hand in her own. “You looked so angry when you left, what happened?”

  Leanin smiled and nodded. “I'm fine, I just had some things to work out.”

  Harold cleared his throat, a spoonful of stew halfway to his mouth. “Rolanda went out after you two.”

  Gideon paled, his face falling. “Leanin had gone pretty far into the woods, is she back?”

  He chewed at the stew slowly, his eyes locked on Gideon's. “She is. Said she couldn't find you two, and that she was going to go to bed, said she was tired. She looked it, too.”

  Gideon nodded. “I don't think I'm hungry, I think I may wash in the lake and then follow her.”

  Leanin grinned, her face was flush and lively, her eyes bright. “Well, I'm not tired at all.” She took the bowl meant for Gideon and added it to her own, spooning the stew into her mouth with little sighs of joy. “I seem to have had some energy injected right into me. Harold, do you have any more of that honey beer?”

  His face brightened and he smiled. “Of course, never let myself get below a few barrels of the stuff. I'll grab us some mugs, I could go for a glass myself.” He stood from the table and disappeared into a back room.

  Gideon excused himself and went outside, following a path around the back of the house. The chickens and goats were in an enclosed shed, locked away in the night, safe from the predators of the forest. The trail led away from the house and down a hill, through a sparse patch of trees and eventually to a body of water. It was a small lake, he could clearly see the other side, but it was calm and cool, shining obsidian and reflecting the myriad of stars above him. A wooden pier stuck out into the lake and Gideon sat at the edge of it, dangling his feet in the water. Little fishes nibbled at his toes, tickling him.

  In his stillness the spicy cinnamon smell of her wafted off him. It was exotic and foreign, further confusing his senses. He stood and jumped off the pier, desperate for some clarity. The water shocked him with a blast of cold, his skin tingling in the rapid change in temperature. The lake wasn't deep, he stood on the bottom, little rocks jabbing into the soft flesh of his feet. He stood for a long time, the moon and stars shining twice, once overhead and once reflected under him, and he tried not to think of anyone or anything. It was nice to just exist for a few moments outside of any need or desire.

  When he got back to the house Leanin, Harold, and Rheannon were sitting on the front stoop drinking their honey beers. He waved to them and ducked inside before a conversation could be started, heading straight to his room.

  He did not turn the lights on once he got to the bedroom, instead feeling his way in the dark to the bed. There was a lump on one side, Rolanda was curled up with the covers pulled over her head. He undressed quietly and got in bed beside her, pulling the covers down slightly and kissing her on the back of the head.

  Her voice came out low and even when she spoke to him. “I'm tired, Gideon.”

  He leaned back against the headrest. “Well, this is the perfect place to be tired. I bet Harold would even let us sleep in tomorrow after the hard day we put in today.”

  Rolanda stirred. “That's not what I mean. I get to a point where I think that maybe I've got this all behind me, and then I see things that can't happen, and I start to wonder if they're real. You can't know what it's like to question your own senses.”

  Gideon swallowed hard, his heart was racing in his chest so loudly he was sure she could hear. “Go to sleep, Rolanda. You'll feel better in the morning. It's a long path, but I'll be here to help you through the bad parts.”

  The covers shifted towards her, exposing Gideon's leg to the chill of the night. Soon Rolanda's breathing was steady and smooth, he was sure that she had fallen asleep. It had happened, Gideon told himself, and now it was time to move on. Rolanda needed him to be there for her, but what did he need?

  As much as he had washed, the scent of Leanin still clung to him. He replayed it in his mind, the hardness of her muscles working against his, even when he was inside her she had gripped at him, as though every part of her wanted to hold on. His thoughts were filled with the urgency of it. The need.

  He fell asleep and dreamed of her.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Gideon woke early the next day, the house was quiet and still. He went for a walk through the trees, inhaling deeply the cold freshness of the air. Drops of dew clung to the tips of leaves, raining down on him as he pushed the branches aside. Everything felt so clean and new.

  Noticing a little patch of dark purple flowers he stopped and gathered a handful of them. The sudden urge to be with Rolanda grabbed him, strongly and irrationally. He wanted to be by her side as she woke, to kiss her softly on her eyelids and cheeks as she had done for him. He ran back to the house.

  She was buried deeply in the covers when he knelt by her side, the only bit of her sticking out was her nose. He pulled down the blanket as softly and gently as his excitement would allow. This was a good feeling, a clean feeling.

  “I picked these for you,” he said as he thrust the flowers into her face.

  Rolanda opened her eyes slightly, squinting in the light, her hair frazzled and falling into her face. When she saw the flowers she smiled. “Thank you, Gideon. I had the most horrible dream, I dreamed that you and Leanin were spiders and I was stuck in your web, there were so many legs all over, they were everywhere.”

  For a moment Gideon's smile fell and then was back. He kissed her on the forehead. “You seem to have developed a new fear for spiders. I'll kill them if I see them.”

  Rheannon and Leanin were just sitting down at the table when Gideon and Rolanda emerged from their room. Harold knelt by the fireplace, coaxing the embers back to life with a pile of twigs and some of the freshly cut logs.

  “Well,” Gideon said, “I think today would be a good day to start looking for a build site. Harold, do you think that you could show me a few possible places that we could stake out?”

  “Are you going to try and build a place here, then?” Rheannon asked.

  Gideon looked between Leanin and Rolanda. “I am. And I hope these two will stay as well.” He put a hand on Rolanda's shoulder and she reached up to hold him. Leanin was smiling at them, a laugh in her eyes.

  “Do you want to come pick out the build site?” Gideon asked Rolanda.

  She gave him a weak smile. Her eyes were strained and tense at the corners, the whites blood-shot and bleary. “No, I'm not feeling well today. I think I'd better stay here until I can get my thoughts straightened out.”

  Rheannon cocked an eyebrow at her and pulled her up out of her chair. “I knew something wasn't quite right. Let me take you to bed and set you up with something warm to drink.”

  Rolanda nodded to her. “You don't have to mother me, I just have to think on a few things.”

  Leading her back to the bedroom, Rheannon grabbed a deerskin blanket from a bin in the corner and wrapped her up in it. “Oh, come now. I never got the chance to be a mother, let me have a little bit of fun now.”

  Gideon watched her go until he felt a light touch rubbing the inside of his thigh. Leanin was staring at him, the laugh still in her eyes, her foot gently caressing him under the table.

  “I'll go with you, Gideon. I've got nothing better to do today.”

  Harold looked between the two before shrugging. “Well, let's be off then, no sense in wasting any time.”

  ...

  He led them on a path through the woods, stopping every now and again to show Gideon open areas that might be good to set up in.

  “What are you going to do in this?” Harold asked Leanin. “Are you thinking about a separate house, or would you join them? Are you staying in Meadowood?”

  Leanin and Gideon looked to each
other. Gideon glanced away quickly and Leanin just smiled. “I think that we would all try to get a place together, just one big happy family,” she said.

  “Do you think Rolanda would be alright with that?” Harold asked, stepping over a particularly large log that had fallen into their path. “It's my experience that most women don't really fancy competition about. They can get territorial like that.”

  Leanin picked up a stick from the brush and brandished it like a sword, swinging it here and there. “I helped save her, I think she can deal with me living in her house.”

  That stopped Harold and he turned. One of his bushy eyebrows was raised. “Save her from what?”

  Gideon paled and he tried to push past Harold. “It's nothing.”

  “Why should it matter if Harold knows?” Leanin asked. “We're running from a man named Akem Manah. He's not terribly happy with us at the moment.”

  Harold scratched at his beard. “I never heard of the guy. We ain't on any maps, though, so unless he stumbles across here like you guys, he won't find you. What did you do to him that's got him gunning for you?”

  Gideon chewed at the inside of his lip. “In his mind? We stole his property.” He tried once again to keep moving.

  The big man wouldn't budge. “You don't seem like thieves. What did you steal?”

  “Not what,” Leanin said. “Who.” She placed a hand on Gideon's shoulder. “Akem kidnapped Rolanda a while back and...”

  “That's enough, Leanin!” Gideon said, throwing her hand away. “He doesn't need to know all the details.” He turned to Harold. “He took Rolanda. We took her back.”

  Tugging at his beard, Harold's eyes widened and he cleared his throat. A flush reddened his cheeks. “Well, like I said, he'd be hard pressed to find you here.” Finally he turned and kept walking.

  They crested a hill and a meadow opened up under them. There was a small pond on one side rippling in the breeze. The grass was long and green, the trees circling them at a fair distance, leaving the area open to the sun.

  “This is perfect,” Gideon said. In his mind the house rose before him, with all its possibilities laid bare. He could see the porch where they would spend time after meals, the three of them holding hands and sitting in rocking chairs. There could be a vegetable garden around back, if they had children down the road they could chase chickens and goats in the yard. “Does anyone have claim to this spot?”

  “Nope,” Harold said. “It was one that we considered when we were first settling here, we went with the other because it had a larger body of water. It'd be a good place, though, and we would be just down the road.”

  Gideon and Leanin walked to the edge of the pond and peered in, there were lily pads and shadows of fish scurrying around.

  Harold's stomach rumbled loudly and he blushed, holding a hand to it. “I think my belly's trying to tell me something. I'm going to head on home for some lunch, do you guys want to come or do you want to check out the land a little more?”

  “You go on ahead,” said Leanin, “we'll catch up in a bit. I want to take a better look around.”

  Harold shrugged. “Alright, well our place is through that path there,” he said, pointing back where they came, “you should be able to just follow it back.” He waved to them and disappeared into the trees.

  Gideon sat by the edge of the pond and removed his shoes, dunking his feet into the water and sighing with pleasure. “What do you think?”

  Leanin sat behind him and wrapped her legs around his torso, stroking her fingers through his hair. “I think it's perfect.”

  He frowned and pushed her away. “I thought that was just a one time thing. I can't make a habit of it, I'm engaged to Rolanda, you know that.”

  Leanin smiled at him. “I do. I also know that in a moment when I lean over and kiss you, you won't stop me.” She pushed him back onto the grass and pressed her body against his, her dark hair falling into his face, and she kissed him. It was true, he didn't stop her.

  ...

  Back at the house Rolanda began to weep. Rheannon held her hand as the little sniffles turned into sobs and then gasps for breath, the emotional floodgates bursting wide open. She patted her hand and said nothing.

  “I don't know that I can handle this,” Rolanda said. “I've got these...things crawling around inside my brain, they're putting thoughts and sights that I know aren't there and making me watch and listen. I didn't used to be this way, they put something in me and I've changed.”

  “Who? Who put something in you?” Rheannon asked.

  “If I think about him he'll know where we are,” Rolanda said, burying her face in her hands.

  Rhea pulled her close and held her, rubbing her back slowly and humming a song. They stayed that way for a long time before Rolanda spoke again.

  “I've been getting sick in the mornings,” she said through her fingers, the sound coming out muffled and wet. “Don't tell Gideon.”

  It took a moment to register what she meant, but when it got through Rheannon's eyes widened and she raised Rolanda's head. “Why wouldn't you tell Gideon? That's some of the happiest news you can get.”

  Rolanda only met her eyes for a brief moment before burrowing herself back into Rheannon's bosom and crying again.

  A thought struck her and Rhea raised her eyebrows. “Rolanda, the baby is Gideon's, right?”

  She didn't answer for a long time, clutching at Rheannon's increasingly wet dress. “Gideon and I have had sex once,” she said.

  Relief caused a large sigh to come out of Rheannon. “Well then, what's the problem? This should be a joyous time, even if you're not ready for it we can all be around to help you out. To tell the truth I would be delighted if all this baby stuff we have finally goes to good home.” Rheannon held her face up and smiled at her. "This is good news."

  Her face was red and splotchy as she let out another cry. “This started before we had sex,” she said.

  Pursing her lips, Rheannon said nothing. Silence hung heavy in the air. Even Rolanda's crying fell into soft whimpers as they sat together. “You been with others,” she said. “That boy's going to be heartbroken.”

  Rolanda sniffed and nodded. “I was made to. They made me, I didn't have a choice. That's when they put those things in my brain.”

  “Hush,” Rheannon said and she pet Rolanda's hair, rocking her back and forth. “That boy Gideon's a good boy, he don't deserve to get hurt like that. You've got this secret and you've got to keep this your secret, just lock it away and forget about it, because you know what? Even if Gideon isn't the one who put that seed in you, he's the one who'll help it grow. If not, if you let that secret out, Gideon's heart will be broken, and that kid won't get to have a father. It's better to just keep it inside.”

  A fresh wave of sobs burst from Rolanda, and Rheannon kept holding her, hushing her quietly and stroking her hair.

  ...

  After Gideon came he stayed inside Leanin. He was softening but it felt good to be enveloped inside her. A pleasant dull sensation clouded his brain. She held him firmly, her muscles hard against his body, her nipples standing straight up in the open air. The smell of cinnamon was all around him. Finally he rolled off her and lay in the grass.

  “Why are we doing this?” Gideon asked. White clouds rolled gently on the breeze far above them.

  “It feels pretty good to have your cock inside me,” Leanin said. She stood and began pulling on her things. “What other explanation are you looking for?”

  Gideon frowned. “No, it's something more than physical, I know it is. Why are you attracted to me? I don't get it. You're so strong and independent, I'm nothing like you.” He stayed on the hill, naked, the open air drying the sweat on his body.

  She pulled her shirt over her he
ad and picked a blade of grass to chew at. “When we were back in that sadist's cell and he was going to torture us, he made you kiss his shoe. Do you remember?"

  Breathing heavily, Gideon blushed. “Of course I remember, what of it?”

  Leanin knelt down beside him and placed a hand on his chest. “Something snapped inside of you, I could see it. You went berserk when he told you how he had hurt Rolanda. Something deep in me responded to that, I haven't been able to shake it.” She shrugged. “What more can I say?”

  It was a clinical answer, and he didn't like the way it was phrased. She hadn't said that she felt anything for Gideon, she had said that something in her responded to him. There was no will there, no feeling, just cause and effect. He stood and began to pull on his pants, avoiding looking at her.

  “Why do you love Rolanda?” Leanin asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

  He glared at her. “I don't want to talk about Rolanda.”

  Leanin laughed and pulled her hair back into a ponytail. “Have I touched a sensitive subject? Interesting, you'll stick your cock in another woman but you won't talk behind her back? Do you love us both equally? Do you love us differently?”

  Gideon turned and began to walk away from her, but she stopped him, grabbing hold of his arm and turning him around. She stuck a finger in his face. “Here's a big question for you, right now you're toeing a line and trying to have us both, but you know it won't work out, and you have to assume the damage that you're doing. If you had to choose one of us, which would it be?”

  Gideon threw away her arm and pushed her back, his nostrils flaring, a high flush in his face. “I told you, I choose her.”