The Ruin of Snow

by Lacy Sheridan

  “No lessons on control in Acalta?”

  “I was meant to follow Nalcai.” The words stung.

  “Nalcai may be thirsty for power, but she respects the strength it takes to fight against her. The longer you resist, the easier it becomes. The stronger you feel…The more you feel, the more you learn to use it.”

  “What do you feel?”

  Her hands tightened on the strap of her bag, her knuckles white. Her voice softened, but there was peril in it. “I was there, did you know?” I couldn’t speak. “The boy tried to keep me away but he was young, weak. But when I found my girl it was too late. They didn’t just kill her; they cursed her. They used my books, my daughter, to work some twisted echo of magic against me, and rather than strip me of my power it killed her. She lay down and cried in the last minutes.” Her dark eyes landed on mine, burning. “You cannot know what I feel, Neyva.”

  That was the end of the conversation. I didn't want to put Morgana at my back as we rode through the forest, but it couldn't be helped, not when I needed to navigate. But she needed me as much as I needed her.

  After all, I had what she wanted most, and the look in her eyes confirmed it. The opportunity to get the last of her vengeance. She didn't need to know I had no intention of letting her take it.

  The path was long and quiet. That was alright. There would be plenty of chaos to come all too soon.

  The sight of the shadowy entrance to the tunnels was such a relief that it made my knees weak. It had only been a few short days, but I was more than ready for the dim lights, the crackling fire, the soft echoes of voices. So different from my home in Acalta. I'd never felt this way about it, no matter how long I'd been away. My heart soared. I tried to keep it from my face.

  This wasn't going to be a happy reunion by any means. Not for anybody. Morgana's eyes were hardening, like she knew we were close. Maybe she tasted the magic of the curse. It was thick and heavy on my tongue, like it had built up in my absence. As much as my insides lifted with the idea of going back, they twisted with dread, too.

  What might I be find? What if I was too late?

  The rustling of wings came from above, and I looked up, unable to stop a smile from breaking out at the flash of golden feathers catching in the late afternoon sun. Kye didn't land, didn't pause or circle to us, but shifted their direction toward the tunnels. Morgana scowled.

  “Don't tell me that's my greeting party,” she muttered.

  We'd hardly spoken on the way here, and though I didn't trust her, I didn't entirely dislike her. My skin prickled at the look on her face. The little reminder of what was between her and them. “If you don't like it, feel free to walk back,” I said. “I'll curse myself.”

  “And get yourself killed.”

  “Would you care either way?”

  “Would I care if a Morningspell showed up at my door and then wound up dead? Yes.”

  I scoffed. “Trust me, my mother might make you an honorary member of the family if she thought you had anything to do with my death.”

  “I don't want anything to do with your mother, good or bad.”

  “Wise choice.” Then we were there, the hidden opening waiting in front of us, and I released the horse to wander and gave Morgana one final warning look. “Whatever's happened in the past, these people are like my family, more than any Morningspell is,” I said, voice low. “Any harm comes to them and you'll have me to pay for it.” She nodded, solemn.

  The tunnels were too quiet as we wound our way to the main cave, like the very air was holding its breath and a dozen pairs of eyes were following us. Like everyone knew I was back, and I'd succeeded, and they weren't sure what to do next. I paused when we arrived at the opening of the large cave, the fire roaring, a small pile of used dishes waiting to be washed, but nobody in sight.

  “Kye, I know you saw us,” I called. “She's not going to hurt any of you. Not if she wants to survive the day.”

  Wesley slipped from the shadows like the master thief he was. His cold gaze swept over Morgana and he folded his arms. “Nice to actually see you for once,” he greeted her. His voice was like a knife, but she lifted her chin.

  “And you.”

  “Where are the others?” I asked.

  He looked at me. “You're alright?” I nodded. I wasn't sure I was—but I wasn't hurt, and that was good enough for now. My mental state was a conversation for another time. If I said I wasn't sure I could do this, wasn't sure of my plan or myself , they'd never let me follow it through.

  Wesley's response was a sharp whistle echoing through the air, and moments later Aurynn and Tamsin appeared, slipping into the cave to hover along the walls, eyeing Morgana. Rayick came next, and Kye, who searched my face without a word. Idris came last and I stifled the questions of whether he was alright. He was in far worse shape than I when I left—hair tousled, eyes haunted. Something crackled in the air as he and Morgana stared at each other, like ice and lightning, strong enough that my magic stirred in response . I pushed it down.

  The silence was thick. I swallowed and said, “Sit. Everyone.”

  One by one they did, keeping a wide divide between Morgana and themselves. “Now what's your grand plan?” Idris asked me , not looking away from Morgana.

  I sat, even though I wanted to stand. I wanted to pace and fidget and scream. I put my hands in my lap and looked around the circle. What a motley group we made: a noble assassin, a village witch, a disgraced guard, a runaway knight, a lost huntress, a fearful street rat, a broken thief, and a child-warrior. Far from the type of crew that anybody would pit against the finest witch in the country. But it was the only one I would attempt it with. I drew a breath.

  “We all know what's come of this situation,” I started. “There will be no escaping my family. So we go back to Idris's plan, to stop them. And your curse is more dangerous than we thought and running out of time. So we kill two birds with one stone. But it's not going to be easy.”

  “How are you supposed to stop your family and break the curse at once?” Aurynn asked. “It almost killed you to slow it down last time.”

  “Exactly. I can't break it, and Morgana can't, either. Not as we are now.”

  Irritation flickered across Wesley's thin face. “What do you mean she can't—”

  “I can't,” Morgana snapped, cutting him off. “The blood curse isn't mine.”

  I pressed my lips together and leveled a cautious look at her. “Actually, I think it is.”

  She shook her head. “I wanted my revenge, but I never—”

  “You haven't given your heart to Nalcai.” It wasn't a question. She paused, blinking, and shook her head.

  “No, I haven't,” she murmured. “I wouldn't.”

  “You feel, and you don't have control over what your magic does. Just like me. I think you did cast it, but not intentionally.”

  The others exchanged looks. Rayick blew out a long breath and linked his fingers behind his head. “Either way, I don't understand. Are you saying your family will break it?”

  “Not my family,” I said. “Us. Both of us. But we're going to need to get onto the estate to do it. I'm not running and hiding anymore. I'm going home.”

  “They'll kill you,” Tamsin pointed out.

  “Not if they can get something from me.”

  Aurynn folded her arms, looking none too pleased, and asked, “And what are you going to offer them?”

  My heart stuttered, but I forced my voice to steady. “My magic.”

  There was dead silence. Morgana gaped. Idris stared into the distance, eyes unfocused as something in his head worked through my plan. Nobody else moved a muscle. “You’re a powerful witch,” Idris said, every word slow and precise. “They’ve gotten the message that you don’t intend to go home. They’ll know it’s a trap. Or at least I would.”

  “They’ll know,” I agreed. “If I walk up to the front door, they’ll know. Which is why they need to believe I’m weak.” I glanced to Rayick, who shifted under my gaze. �
��I need to be brought there. By someone like a knight.”

  “I’m not a knight,” he protested. “Not anymore.”

  “They don’t know that. You look like one, you act like one. With the right clothes and story, they won’t question it.” I sounded more confident than I felt, but Rayick’s tension eased.

  “How are we going to get the clothes? And am I supposed to take you there in the middle of the night?”

  I faced Morgana, who sighed. “Breaking curses takes time and care that Neyva says we don’t have, but if we time things correctly, we can make it work. As far as clothes, Neyva won’t be in any shape to hold a glamour in place, but I will be.”

  “Will a glamour work on your family?” Aurynn asked.

  It was a gamble I hated to make, but unless we could acquire authentic knight’s armor in the next day it was necessary. I relented. “I’m not sure, but they should be too focused on me to look closely. My magic will obscure any taste of the glamour. If you can sell the story, Rayick, they should hear that a knight found me alone and brought me back, and that’ll be the end of it.”

  “Should,” Rayick repeated under his breath.

  I winced. “You don’t have to. I’m asking for your help, not demanding it. All of you.”

  There was a moment of silence as they exchanged gazes. Rayick to Idris to Wesley to Aurynn to Tamsin and finally Kye. I held my breath, then Rayick gave a single nod, the faintest shadow of his usual grin pulling at his mouth. “Whatever you need, kid.”

  “You’re one of us,” Aurynn added.

  I smiled, relief flooding cool and clean through me, but the way Kye watched me dampened it. Their eyes flicked from me to Morgana . “You said Neyva wouldn’t be in any shape to hold a glamour,” they said. Not a question, but a quiet order for information.

  I twisted my fingers together, staring at them. This was the part I’d been dreading, but there was no avoiding it. I searched for the right words. “Morgana is going to loosen my magic,” I said. “Take away some of my control. Enough to give me some…extra punch. But it’ll mean I won’t be able to work anything too precise. My magic will be strong but wild. I’ll need it to stay alive once I walk into that house.”

  A dark flicker of grim understanding passed through Kye’s eyes, and they nodded. I stood and held a hand to them, praying the fear thundering through me wasn’t visible. “Come with me?”

  “Of course,” they said, lacing their fingers through mine.

  “It isn’t dangerous, is it?” Wesley asked as I started for the tunnels, Morgana standing.

  “No,” I lied. “Be ready at dawn. I’ll need you all in Acalta.”

  Nods all around, and then I continued, leading Kye and Morgana to my hollow. It was smaller than the others’, more cramped with the three of us, but away from the group and well suited to working magic. The lingering taste of it in the air from the protections I’d put in place remained. Without a word, Morgana began pulling candles from her bag, placing them on the dirt floor.

  Kye’s hand tightened around mine, but they didn’t look at me when they spoke. “Your breath hitches when you lie. Just the slightest bit. It’s almost impossible to catch.”

  I blinked. “It’s exactly what I said it is. I didn’t lie.” About that.

  “You lied to Wesley. It’s dangerous.”

  Morgana snorted. “She has a penchant for dangerous ideas, doesn’t she?”

  Kye ignored her. It took me too long to find my voice. “It’s a curse. But Morgana can and will break it before it causes any real damage. I only need it in place long enough to fool my mother.”

  I expected a protest or argument, but nothing came. I kept my attention on Morgana’s preparations. “You trust her to?” they said.

  “If she tries to break her word, you’ll be there to make sure she doesn’t.”

  “And if it isn’t broken?”

  “I’ll be alright.”

  “Don’t lie to make me feel better, Neyva.”

  I took a deep breath and faced them. “If it isn’t broken, it will kill me. It’s a risk, but it’s the one way I can think of to pull this off.”

  “You don’t have to do this,” they said, eyes boring into mine. Not a plea—Kye wouldn’t plead—but the closest I’d seen from them. Their eyes were shadowed, and I wished I could say something to make it go away. I couldn’t. “We’ll find another way.”

  My throat was tight, “Yes, I do.” We both knew I did. Withdrawing wasn’t an option. We had lost the luxury of options. We’d lost the luxury of waiting and considering—it was time to act, for once and for all. Better or worse.

  Morgana raised an eyebrow, trying and failing to hide the faint disgust on her face as Kye traced the curves of my fingers. A look wiped it from her expression and she cleared her throat. “Are you ready?”

  “Never,” Kye said.

  She shot them a foul look. “I can curse you again, barbarian.”

  “And I can tear your eyes out,” they replied. “You gave me nice and sharp talons.”

  I put a finger under their chin, moving their attention to me. “Hush, Emris. We need her. For now.”

  “And when we’re done?”

  I smiled. “If we survive this, the six of you can fight over what to do with her.”

  Morgana faltered and her eyes flashed to me. “I cursed seven. I didn’t see the Awhari woman.”

  My throat shrunk. “My sister killed Enaelle.”

  “I can’t say I’ll miss the snake.”

  “Enaelle,” I snapped, and Kye’s grip on my hand contracted. “Enaelle, Idris, Aurynn, Rayick, Tamsin, Wesley, and Kye. If you plan to get revenge on someone, you should learn their names.”

  She gritted her teeth, holding a retort she thought better of, and asked, “Are we going to do this ridiculous plan of yours or not?”

  I exchanged another look with Kye. They said nothing, but their eyes were enough. They didn’t like this plan any more than Morgana did—or any of the others. But they trusted me, and I squeezed their hand once. “It’ll be alright.”

  “You’ve never been cursed,” they said. “You can’t imagine.”

  I smiled, grim. “I was cursed the day I was born, Kye.”

  They nodded and dropped my hand. I shifted to lie between the spread of candles—a loose circle around my head and shoulders, open in a large enough space for my body. I flexed my fingers as I settled onto the cool stone, forcing my hands not to tremble. I was putting my heart and life in the hands of a witch I hardly knew, who had done more damage than I could reverse and hated my friends with a passion. This could go terribly wrong, terribly quickly, but there was no other choice. Not if I hoped to survive Sarafine and Mother, and not if I hoped to save Kye and the others.

  Morgana lit the candles and I breathed in the smoke, closing my eyes. This was it. I was going to win or die, and there was nothing in between. If this failed, there was no backup plan. If Morgana wasn’t trustworthy enough to keep me alive through the next few days, there was no backup plan.

  All my life I’d been in control of my world. I’d played it like a chess board, the way I’d been taught and expected to. I’d thrived off that control, and now I was handing it over completely.

  The thought petrified me to the core.

  If it had only been Kye in that space with me, I would have let it show. I would have let them whisper to me until my frantic pulse calmed. But Morgana was there, and Sarafine was circling nearer with every passing hour, and this was no time to show weakness. I drew one last deep breath and let go.

  Let the Lady, Nalcai, the stars, the dice of blind chance—whatever truly did rule, let it have control for once.

  “Any last words, Morningspell?” Morgana asked with grim humor.

  “One more joke like that and Kye might kill you,” I warned her. My voice felt wrong, tight. I fought the urge to search for Kye’s hand.

  Her laugh was rough and whispery, and I closed my eyes, listening to the crackle of something bei
ng burned. Smoke and a deep, herby smell. Soon something else joined it, sharp and too sweet, like rot. The magic rose in the air, thicker with every breath, and my pulse pounded. I worked to keep my breathing relaxed and even. An impossible breeze swept through, raising goosebumps along my flesh and waving the tiny flames like mad.

  “Last chance to change your mind,” Morgana murmured. I opened my eyes to see her kneeling at my head, one hand raised. The firelight caught on her knife and I fought a shudder. It would be so easy for her to plunge it into my chest or throat.

  “Go on.”

  I closed my eyes again before she slid the knife through her palm, and the first warm drops of blood fell on my brow. I locked my joints. Another three drops at the base of my throat. At each wrist. The ones over my heart came last, hot against my freezing skin.

  I felt the tugging first, like a rope had wound its way around my soul. Around something deep inside. My magic snarled but the hold constricted my lungs. I dug my fingers into the dirt, forcing myself to breathe through it. My heartbeat roared in my ears.

  Another pull, harder this time. My magic thrashed.

  Another. Everything in me felt taut and strained.

  A blade sliced through it. Something snapped free. I gasped, back arching from the ground as shards of glass drove their way into my spine. A crack like lightning shot through me, white-hot behind my closed eyelids. The world vanished.

  Twenty-Nine

  “You have three days to make this plan of yours work, maybe four, or you’ll burn yourself out,” were Morgana's parting words as Rayick and I left the tunnels, meant only for my ears. Enough time to get to Acalta and confront Mother and Sarafine, but not much more. The curse we'd chosen would only last so long. If I didn't do my work in that time, there was no fixing it. If Morgana was handy, she may be able to reverse it—but that was a big if.

  There were no goodbyes. I wouldn't hear them. We left with the horse Morgana and I had stolen, the others under strict orders to wait for sunset before following. It would do no good to have a group of cursed rogues appearing in Acalta at the same time I returned. Mother would be suspicious. It was a huge risk to get Rayick so close to her.