Stone Of Matter

by B L Barkey

  She laughed it off, though it was obviously directed at himself. He would have been more excited, except that this taunt was an old one. He felt like there might be truth behind it. Yet any time he had tried to initiate a relationship, she had pulled away.

  Again, perhaps it was something in Ammon that kept him from committing to her. Maybe it was the sense that he had another purpose yet to serve before marriage. Two years in the Sector Guard. Then I’ll be ready to marry, he thought. Patience brings peace.

  “Poor guy,” said Ammon, taking a drink from his cup. Sadie punched him, spilling water all over them both.

  “The heck is wrong with you!” said Ammon, trying to sound serious. She knocked his cup over, spilling the rest of the water on him. He stood up then and grabbed her, dumping the water all over her. He used her hoodie as a towel, feeling her pulling him in closer the whole time.

  He sat back down while Liz giggled and continued asking them more about themselves. Sadie pretended to pout, but Ammon kicked her chair lightly every couple minutes, where she would then press firmly against him with her foot.

  They chose a main course, selecting several plates of assorted fish and fruits, along with several small dishes of soups from the Gardens. “I’m sorry you guys, but we are running a little low on fish as of late. I can bring some, but it is not freshly caught.”

  “No problem at all,” Ammon said with a smile, though he indeed thought this odd. Anytime Cephasonians needed fish, the Gardeners would cast nets into the endless Emerald Whirlpool to the north. Its supply was endless. Or so Ammon had thought.

  After another hour of talking, they got up and walked out together.

  “Hey, you guys should come with us tomorrow!” Sadie burst out, as if breaking some unspoken rule.

  “Hmm, that depends. Where and with whom?” asked Mikael for them both.

  “The ‘where’ is in the North Hills at the hot springs,” said Sadie, looking at Mikael but smiling at Ammon.

  “Whereas the ‘who’…,” Liz said, looking away, then back. “You won’t like that part. Sadie and myself, of course. But Chalice was the one who invited us.”

  A tight knot whipped into his stomach, knocking the air from him. He felt like he was just pushed from a ledge, his heart floating as he freefell. It was a place caught between anger and elation, unrelenting in its grasp.

  “He didn’t really give us a chance to decline,” Sadie said, true apology heavy in her voice. “You know how he is. Anyway, they invited some other girls, so we’re inviting some other boys. It’ll be much better with you two there.” Her words put his mind at ease, though he wished she had said the sweet words before the bitter ones.

  Ammon nudged her and she laughed as they started walking outside. Soon they gave each other hugs and went their separate ways, planning to meet at the same time tomorrow at the foot of the North Hills.

  After a few minutes apart, Ammon already missed her presence. Boy I’m in trouble, Ammon thought, shaking his head and laughing to himself. This was how he always felt after being near her. So, he went and did what he always did in these situations. He said goodbye to his brother, then headed to the Index to distract himself with heavy reading.

  He had finished his current books at the start of the week, then worked his way through two more. He now studied a book he had read ten times before, which covered the very few known facts about the SG Trials. It was actually kind of cool that little was known about them. However, they were not without their own gruesome stories. These stories were well-known throughout Cephas, usually excluding names.

  One story spoke of the Trials causing a young man to question himself so much, he finally lost all stability within his own identity. He was only able to handle simple cleaning tasks from then on.

  Another story told of how a boy had passed the Trials with flying colors, but after being accepted, he immediately sought out the darker paths from their teachings, and was exiled from the island before he could corrupt himself and his fellow students further. He had actually convinced two of his friends to go with him, or so the story went. Others say he developed three different personalities in order to embrace his own dark desires, and instead of taking two friends, he instead took his three personalities.

  His eyes drifted shut. After startling himself awake, he finally gave up, closing his book and pulling the covers over his legs. His burning hormones had calmed down. His mind now transcended toward higher thoughts. I will make it through the Trials. I will walk the path of light.

  II

  It was her. He knew her to be a female, though she was clearly spectral. She seemed more cloud than animal. More spirit than body. Perhaps more gradient than duality.

  The snow leopard stood atop the slate rock, sweeping her tail below her feet like a pendulum clock. Her tail was twice as long as her body, as thick as a tree trunk. Her eyes were icy blue, as if encased in the ice were several sapphires.

  She watched him, curious. Perceptive. Perhaps hungry. She sees all.

  Behind her eyes was intelligence belonging to a soul aging further than oak trees or mountain ranges. Tobias had a smidgeon of this same quality in his hazel eyes, though he lacked the same comprehension of things.

  Snow was falling all around them, so dense and in such quantities that it seemed more unreal than the creature herself. He had seen snowy mountains and snow leopards in gliscs before. Yet none were comparable to her.

  Ammon could almost feel the coolness of the air. A thin vapors poured between them with each breath.

  The snow leopard comprehended him. She knew Ammon. He could see that. She was watching him as she yawned and lied down in place. The complex patterns on her fur were like the night sky on the clearest of evenings, seeming to shift in his peripheral views. This is not the only thing she changes in her form, Ammon thought. He knew not where the thought came from. Yet he accepted it, along with his sudden knowledge of her sifting nature. She was a woman. She was ever-shifting. She was knowing.

  Ammon heard the voice of an angel. It was Lumena, though bodiless as an echo in his fragmented memory.

  ‘Follow her eyes in the snow. She was here just now. She’s the one who will guide you always, to remember.’ He felt a smile press smooth against his ear.

  The snow leopard arose, turning away without care. She glared back at him, then looked to the ground before his feet. She leapt down then, creating less noise than a whisper. Her eyes found his again. He shivered. It grew colder. She was closer.

  She stopped, then crouched. Somehow, Ammon knew he was where he needed to be, right in that moment, as well as in life. He needed only to stay his course, to see it to the end. This brought him such comfort that tears froze on his cheeks.

  The snow ceased falling. ‘Change will come’, she growled. It was the same growl from his dreams before. He looked into her eyes. He knew he must never lose sight of those sapphires again. But he would. All knew he would, as did they all. It took much practice and hard lessons to remember heavy things.

  Warmth brushed his cheek. It came again, warm and wet. Consistent and repetitive. He brushed it away, yet it continued…

  III

  Foursday

  Ammon heard himself call out. He felt the wet warmth on his face once more. Suddenly, he realized its source.

  “Tobias! How’d you get up here, punk?”

  His pup was lying on top of him, straddling him like a man does a horse. Thoroughly confused, as if perhaps still in his dream, his mind reeled to find reason for Tobias’s presence. Ammon looked past his own feet to see Mikael hunched over and peering into his cube.

  “I went home to have dinner with Mother. Thought it might be fun to take Tobias with us.”

  Ammon felt embarrassed then, avoiding his brother’s eyes. “Was I talking in my sleep again?”

  “No more than usual,” Mikael said, grinning. Then Ammon remembered. If there was one person in the world who was used to his weird sleeping behaviors, it was Mikael. Once, Mikael had wok
en up in the middle of the night to find Ammon standing in the corner of their room. Thoroughly confused and a little scared, Mikael said he had crept towards his brother. That’s when he had heard the leaking sound, and wondered if it were raining outside. A few moments and steps later, he then realized the sound was coming from Ammon, who was in the process of soaking every last thing in Mikael’s storage chest with a good ol’ midnight whiz.

  Ammon remembered waking up to his brother shaking his shoulder, wondering why he was being bothered in his sleep, then wondering why he was being pushed in the midst of a good pee. Then he had realized the two things should not go together. With a jump and a spray, he had fallen backwards as if falling back into consciousness, adrenaline bringing him to the reality of where he was. Or more accurately, where he wasn’t. He was not in front of a toilet, nor in a concealed clearing of trees.

  He had spent the entire next day scrubbing his brother’s most prized possessions, apologizing incessantly. But at the same time, he had been asleep. Could he really be held responsible for what he did in his sleep?

  Needless to say, Mikael had dealt with all the weirdest and funniest moments of Ammon’s sleeping behaviors. His shyness in front of his brother evaporated.

  Mikael laughed as Ammon tried to get up again, keeping his lips sealed tight to prevent Tobias from licking his teeth. He then scooted out of his cube, pushing his reluctant pup. Tobias had everything he wanted in that moment; Ammon all to himself. Yet he finally relented and leapt to the floor, then ran a short distance away to check for danger.

  Ammon grabbed two breakfast bars from his compartment, then grabbed a third bar of oats for Tobias. He grabbed a clean shirt and his shoes, slipping them on as he emerged from his cube. Ammon and Tobias both scarfed down their bars as Mikael walked beside them. They soon exited the Leviticum and started northwest along the trails.

  After about a half-mile, the trail turned into a rougher dirt path with no lamps. There was an old wooden sign to the right of the trail which was repainted every year. The letters listed three separate warnings: “Be back before nightfall. Never enter the North Mounts alone. Stay away from the Emerald Whirlpool.”

  They soon came upon another sign in the center of a fork. There was an arrow pointing to the left, with words above it that read: “Hot springs, North Beach, Shadows”. A second arrow pointed east, stating: “Levitians and Gardeners only.” This was the path to the Emerald Whirlpool.

  They weaved further northwest. Soon the path was littered with more rocks and tree roots, as it rose visibly and transitioned from the North Hills to the North Mounts. Ammon told Tobias “go play”, which meant he was allowed to sprint ahead and search the trees. Tobias had never caught a squirrel in his life. Ammon hoped he would, just once. To complete his mortal journey. Yet he knew the pup would let the critter go, regardless of the excitement.

  A quick glimpse flashed before Ammon’s eyes. He saw the needles and leaves of the trees before them get blanketed with several feet of snow. Cold rushed in, stealing his breath.

  It seeped into his mind, knocking him into his dark dreams. The atmosphere was thick. Suffocating. He saw spotted tree trunks. A fur coat. Ticking time. Freezing eyes. A paralyzing stare.

  And then it was gone. He turned to Mikael, who looked content in his own thoughts. Ammon shook his head clear, promising to get more sleep that night.

  He looked all around, noticing the differences in the North Hills from the rest of the island. It was closer to the leafy trees of the jungles to the south and west of Cloud Mountain, yet the air was drier and more still.

  While the trees to the southwest, and even those to the east, were teeming with life, the North Hills held larger, quieter species of mammals. Stealthier. There was little danger, for the beasts did not hunger for flesh. Yet some beasts did not understand their own strength. A playful swipe from a cougar could mean a disembodied head. A gentle bite from a wolf could bring fresh rivers of blood flowing onto the soil. The animals intended no harm, though sometimes harm came anyway.

  Ammon spotted small rocks tumbling down the slope. Something is lurking up there, he thought, looking up. But he knew he would see nothing. These animals were always playing, tumbling around in their own games. They would see them soon enough. As I saw her last night. The snow leopard. Ammon shuddered.

  As they continued on, they passed by where Ammon had first met the princess wolf L’Nala. She was the only female cub of her mother’s litter. Her mother was the greatest lurker of all. None had seen Mother-Wolf in almost twenty years, just before Ammon was born. This was considered odd amongst the Cephasonians, since every other animal on the island showed great trust in them. They had no reason not to trust them, nor to avoid them. To come near meant food, gentle caresses, and kindness.

  And yet, Mother-Wolf avoided all. Ammon thought he saw her once, hidden on the rim of the North Hills. She had seemed to tower above the middle of the tallest trees. Perhaps it had been just shadow, though it had fled like a beast. He had chased after her for a time, knowing it was pointless and hoping for otherwise.

  Less than a month after that, he had stumbled upon L’Nala. She was only a few months old then, and very new to the world. He had picked up the cub like gathering water in both hands, cupped together and letting little slip away. The the water in his hands was the memory of it, focusing all his being on the creature to remember it clearly.

  She had been soft as silk, as warm as if just napping with her mother, who was both legend and protector of the island. Her eyes had been more curious than those of river otters, and more mischievous too. Her tongue the pink of a seashell after high-tide, wet with many kisses. She had also been teething, for her mouth had often found his fingers.

  That’s when Tobias had caught up. Ammon had totally forgotten about Tobias at the sight of the wolf cub, and had then regretted it. Mother-Wolf will not like this, he had thought. He remembered feeling terrified, yet satisfied in one new way. He had wondered if he would ever give his own life to save his pup Tobias. He knew in that moment, as he stepped between the obscured wood and his pup, that he would.

  The wind had picked up, or so it had seemed as the trees had begun to sway, to tremble. He had been reminded of storm waves crashing on the shore, before remembering he was far from any beach. It was the low rumble of some gigantic creature. It was the voice of Mother-Wolf.

  Though he had heard stories of Cephasonian ancestors speaking directly to animals, Ammon did not have this ability. And yet he had still heard her voice, loud and clear. Careful, Mother-Wolf had spoken. You hold my child in your hands. You may love her, but careful. Lest I scatter you and your dog-friend into bloody soil.

  He had stood still, knowing what he had heard, yet still unbelieving, for sometimes he knew things before he believed them. The shaking trees had settled some, though the rumble had continued low in the rocks. Tobias had then walked up, all tension in his body gone. He had put his nose up to the wolf cub, then licked her warm, tender ears.

  That’s when Ammon had heard her name. The first one. The beloved. L’Nala.

  It was a name he had heard before in a story, or so he had thought. But even up until present day, he could not find the story. And still, that was her name. He knew it to be true. L’Nala, the largest wolf pup. The most beloved cub. The heir to the Mother-Wolf of Cephas legend.

  From that day on, L’Nala would appear when he was entirely alone with Tobias. Tobias would then disappear, though he always returned to Ammon’s whistle. When he returned, his ears were often soaking wet, which meant he was licking ears with L’Nala once more. Tobias grew more cautious around other humans then as well, while seeming to only grow closer to Ammon, which seemed impossible to do.

  He hoped to see her now, yet he knew the chances were slim. Especially if Chalice and Maison were on their way. He bent down and scratched his pup’s ears. Tobias looked up and seemed to smile as he panted. His walk turned to a proud trot, his tail flicking more than usual.

&n
bsp; “Do you think we used to speak the same language as animals?” Ammon pondered aloud.

  Mikael responded quickly, as if his thoughts already circled in the same space.

  “Didn’t the Arcanums tell us yesterday that we did?” answered Mikael.

  “Yeah, and that’s exactly why I ask. To speak the same language, the Golden Tongue. I mean, many of them probably don’t even have the physical capability to speak.”

  “Maybe they each had their own accents, like those people from different countries in the glisc movies,” Mikael said.

  Ammon laughed. “Yeah, I suppose so. Or maybe we spoke in a different way, but very similar to the speed and understanding of communicating with words. Maybe it was even more efficient, like by thought?”

  “Hmmm, I dunno. I suppose it’s possible.”