Strong and Hard Women

by Tanya Bunsell

  Female bodybuilders are therefore reflexive, self-conscious agents who live out their own definitions and understandings of femininity. Like Tate’s (1999: 35) serious weight-trainers, these women, firm in their identity, do ‘shape their body to their own liking’, perceiving their quest for muscle as ‘a personal challenge’

  that does not seek ‘the approval of men, women, or society’.

  However, as noted at the start of the chapter, our identity is in constant negotiation through interactions with others. Female bodybuilders therefore employ several other strategies in order to maintain a positive identity. Similar to other deviant and stigmatized people who are excluded from mainstream society, these muscular women pursued social relationships among like-minded and like-bodied individuals (Hall and Jefferson 2006). Social comparison theorists claim that in order for deviant individuals to retain a positive sense of self, cognitive and physical boundaries are erected between themselves and vilified others (Rosenburg and Kaplan 1982; Widdicombe and Wooffitt 1990). Female bodybuilders consequently cultivate an attitude of superiority to ‘normals’, valuing themselves as unique, special and different to other women (Fisher 1997). In comparison, outsiders are frequently perceived as lazy, unmotivated and unattractive. Negative and cruel comments made by these unimportant ‘ignorants’ (Christine, a bodybuilder of

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  five years) are thereby dismissed and ignored. Instead, these extraordinary women surround themselves with partners and friends who are accepting, encouraging and complimentary of their appearance and endeavour. For instance, as Lucie (a bodybuilder of eight years) stated defiantly:

  My husband thinks I’m sensuous and hot… among other flattering

  descriptions. Just because some people might not comprehend a certain aesthetic look, doesn’t mean that other people don’t appreciate and love it.

  These crucial interactions with ‘kindred souls’ create an alternative frame of reference, enabling female bodybuilders to deflect the wider stigmatization that they face in their daily lives (Cohen 1955). Furthermore, the identity of the female bodybuilder is reaffirmed by engaging in activities that support their lifestyle and goals. For example, reading and buying bodybuilding magazines, books, DVDs, posters and pictures normalizes the image of the female bodybuilder (Tate 1999), whilst interacting on bodybuilding forums and attending competitions allows them to be part of a collective identity. Indeed, the internet has provided an increasingly important source of information and interaction for female bodybuilders.

  Cyberspace has created a place where geographically scattered female bodybuilders can not only feel valued, but also come together to create a kind of ‘sisterhood’

  (a group of similar women whose shared struggle gives them a unique emotional connection), supporting each other by offering friendship and practical advice.

  Although not all of my interviewees believed that the bodybuilding subculture provided a supportive network for females (see Fisher 1997, Klein 1993 and Lowe 1998 for pessimistic claims about ‘hypermasculinity’ and ‘devaluation of women’ within the culture), some of the women found great comfort in mix-ing with their ‘own’. For example, Alice (a bodybuilder of 18 months) claimed:

  ‘bodybuilders are… unique… I have found more compassion, thoughtfulness, encouragement and sense of community in my short time being a bodybuilder than anywhere else’. This sense of camaraderie is reinforced by the fact that these women occupy the same ‘social field’ and recognize, and pursue, the same form of physical capital (Bourdieu 1978).

  Body dissatisfaction: the price paid for investing too much in

  the body’s appearance

  Even though the defiant, positive narratives of desire, motivations and pleasures in embodiment articulated by these women are real, to leave their story there would offer only a partial analysis of what it is to be a female bodybuilder. Like other human beings, muscular women are complicated, complex individuals who can hold apparently opposing beliefs simultaneously. This section, then, explores the more negative aspects of embodiment experienced in the daily lives of these women. Despite the various strategies employed to sustain their identity, the female bodybuilder still has to contend with arguably the most powerful critic of all – herself. Tate (1999: 42) argues that female bodybuilders become slaves to the

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  ‘tyranny of the[ir] latent image’, which ‘rules women’s lives – how they perceive themselves, their diets, training routines, leisure time, relationships… fear of what they would become if they didn’t train’. The ‘male gaze’ is rejected, but is arguably replaced by yet another voyeur. The women become driven, obsessed and self-disciplined by their ideal of perfection – spurred on by their own concept of beauty and the perfect female form. Thus, far from creating a body that they can be content with, many of my participants concurred that ‘bodybuilding makes you even more critical of your body’ (Lucie, a bodybuilder of eight years). As Danielle (a bodybuilder of five years) contends: ‘I think bodybuilders are all hypercritical of themselves. It’s an art form where precision is everything and there is always something that can be improved’.

  Bodybuilders have commonly been diagnosed and pathologized by psychiatrists as suffering from ‘reverse anorexia’ (‘bigorexia’), or what has been more popularly classified as ‘muscle dysmorphia’. Symptoms include the preoccupation with

  ‘excessive’ muscularity (to the extent that it impairs and impacts upon daily lifestyle) and are accompanied by feelings of poor body image (Connan 1998) and low self-esteem (Olivardia et al. 2000). Despite continual reassurance from the tape measure, fat calipers, weight scales and other people, the ‘bigorexic’ still perceives themselves

  as too small and ‘not muscular enough’.2 The condition is believed to be under-diagnosed due to the societal acceptability for men to be or to desire to be big (Pope et al. 2000). Until relatively recently, only men were attributed to be suffering from this disorder. However studies such as that of Phillips et al. (1997) are quick to point out that women can also develop characteristics of muscle dysmorphia. Fisher (1997) claims that, similar to the anorexic, female bodybuilders see themselves through a distorted lens and fail to see themselves equitably.

  Michelle (a bodybuilder of five years) illustrates this point in the following quote:

  I still don’t see it (the muscularity). Though… I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and it was one of those moments where I could see myself more objectively and I thought fucking hell I’m actually quite big. But most of the time I just don’t know – I always think that I’m small and not good enough and that this body part needs bringing up.

  The pleasures in the body, then, can become secondary to the discontent and dissatisfaction these women felt from their perceived physical flaws and inadequacies. Similar to many female bodybuilders in this study, Emma (a bodybuilder of 19 years) explains: ‘You can’t ever be “happy” with your body – you are always trying to improve it’. The continual struggle to achieve their “latent” image (Tate 1999) can generate discord between their mind and body, potentially allowing the body to become an object of hate, resentment, loathing and fear. This is demonstrated in the words of Amy (a bodybuilder of four years) and Sharon (a bodybuilder of 12 years):

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  Every time you look in the mirror you just feel like you’re a million miles away from the ideal that you’re striving for… I just think what more do I have to do?!

  (Amy)

  I keep striving for the light at the end of the tunnel and hope that eventually I’ll get where I want to be. But the thing about bodybuilding is that I’m never satisfied… nothing ever seems good enough… I hate the summer, I don’t like wearing shorts and tops, or being on the beach, I prefer covering up – maybe one day I’ll feel differently.

  (Sharon)

  Female bodybuilders do not therefore escape the relen
tless need for self-improvement associated bodily dissatisfaction experienced by other women in society (Bordo 1988). As Smith (1990: 19) notes in research into the effects of fashion magazines on female body image, ‘the body, for the feminine subject, is the object of the subject-at-work’; the body is always inadequate, ‘there is always work to be done’.

  Food

  Feminists such as Steiner-Adair (1990), Bordo (1997, 2004) and Frost (2001) claim that in Western society women are expected to be preoccupied with their weight and dieting, and indeed to be ‘at war’ and in an antagonistic relationship with their

  bodies (see Chapter 4). However, female bodybuilders have a particularly complex relationship with food. Although they need surplus ‘quality’ calories and a regular high protein intake throughout the day in order to create the optimum conditions for muscle growth, for the muscles to actually show (to mark them out from being simply ‘big’ women, or even worse considered ‘overweight’ women), they need to

  have low body fat (this is discussed further in Chapter 9). The women in my study dealt with this dilemma in two different ways. The first group felt that the desire for muscle and strength far outweighed any additional increase in body fat that might be inadvertently acquired as part of their quest. Within this category, the women were divided between those who embraced the opportunity to eat on a regular basis, declaring that they spent so much time ‘dieting for competitions that they wanted to enjoy their food as much as possible’ (Michelle, bodybuilder of five years), and those who were committed to this muscle-building philosophy but developed an alienating and negative relationship with their bodies as a result. This is illustrated by Amy (a bodybuilder of five years):

  I know that in order to grow [muscle] I have to put on this extra layer of fat.

  But I hate it when I can’t see the definition in my abs. I just feel flabby and uncomfortable in myself… I end up wearing baggy training tops and clothes so that it doesn’t show.

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  The second group of women in my study, however, spend a lot of time and energy trying to ‘balance’ their food intake and exercise output, in order to retain a body of low fat percentage, with defined muscularity. This is supported by Mary (a bodybuilder of 12 years):

  I need to eat more [in order to put on size and muscle], which goes against the grain of everything… But I have a big appetite… I have had to cut down on CV [cardiovascular exercise] a lot, it’s a bit of a mental thing… It was my birthday last week and I ate out so many times, I needed to do boxercise and I really worked hard … Otherwise I would become so fat.

  The negative and detrimental attitude to food cited by many of my participants has been confirmed by other studies. In Tate’s (1999) work, for instance, the desired image becomes so powerful that the women feel compelled to perform excessive amounts of cardiovascular work in order to ‘burn’ off any ‘bad’, fat-laden food to which they have ‘given in’ and eaten. Confirming Bordo’s (1993, 2004) claims that there is a direct link between bodybuilding and anorexia (see

  Chapter 4), one judge told me that ‘eating disorders are rife within the industry’.

  Both bodybuilding and anorexia effect an investment of everything into outward appearance and are connected by the anti-fat theme which permeates our society, and which particularly affects women (Lloyd 1996). Furthermore, whilst male bodybuilders also struggle to eat the ‘right’ foods, it is female bodybuilders who have the most difficult relationship with dieting. Not only is it harder for them to lose fat due to natural hormones and genetics, but there is still more pressure for women to retain a ‘slimmer’ appearance throughout the year for the purposes of photo shoots, promotional endorsements and opportunities within the subculture (Lowe 1998; Heywood 1998).

  Female bodybuilders, like their male counterparts, accumulate vast knowledge about nutrition. Their diet becomes regulated with extreme precision and it is not unusual for strict diet plans to be adhered to on a daily basis, determining the exact number of grams of protein, carbohydrates and fat that is allowed. As Tate (1999: 43) explains, the ‘relationship with food becomes one in which food does not necessarily need to be enjoyable’, but is used scientifically and calculatedly as a fuel for the formation of muscle. These diets become extremely monotonous and structured, requiring immense self-imposed discipline in order for them to stick to ‘plan’. The body, then – especially in relation to food – becomes ‘a territory that must be cherished, yet overcome, as a best friend and worst enemy’ (Yates 1991: 168).

  The regime

  In order to achieve their ‘ideal’ body and to lay the foundations for optimum muscle growth, female bodybuilders construct a very rigid, structured lifestyle.

  As Jennifer (a bodybuilder of two years) put it, time is ordered on a basis in which bodybuilders ‘wake up, eat, “medicate”, work out, eat, work out, eat, “medicate”,

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  sleep’. The lives of female bodybuilders therefore revolve around their muscular endeavour. As Michelle (a bodybuilder of five years) articulates: Bodybuilding is all-consuming. I think about bodybuilding from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to sleep. Sleep, eat, drink, think of bodybuilding…

  all the time you are either thinking about training, or supplements, or you’ve got the next feed to sort out etc.

  The pursuit of muscle takes over every aspect of their world, including relationships and work commitments:

  My partner knew what I was like when she took me on, she knew first and foremost that I was a bodybuilder and that would take first place above everything else including her.

  (Emma, bodybuilder of 12 years)

  Lucie (a bodybuilder of eight years) captures some of the ongoing sacrifices and strains on relationships that are a consequence of the regimented lifestyle in the following quote:

  It’s the early nights, eating at certain times, not going out to BBQs in the summer… it takes a lot of time management and a lot of stress… it’s okay for me but I can feel the stress on my friends and family because they don’t understand it and they really don’t like it.

  The highly structured and regulated day-to-day world of the female bodybuilder makes life much simpler and more straightforward, in a comparable manner to the highly organized life of the army or monastery. By immersing themselves in routines and rituals, female bodybuilders help to retain their self-identity, giving themselves focus, meaning and purpose, as ‘habits lie at the very base of our sense of self’ (Shilling 2008b: 13). However, habits can also function to ‘restrict our relationship with the world’ and become a negative, self-imposed doctrine (ibid.). Barbara (a bodybuilder of seven years) encapsulates the pressures of this constraining lifestyle and the consequential problems in striving for perfection: If I’ve had a bad day and I haven’t trained or trained hard enough, or my diet’s gone to pot, then I feel a failure. Bodybuilding makes you monitor every aspect of your life from how and when you train, to diet and sleep.

  It makes me irritable if my routine gets disturbed and it has to come above everything else in my life…

  In this context, far from being a liberating experience, the daily lifestyle of the bodybuilder could be seen as a good way of controlling women who break away from societal norms. The obsession and inward focus on the body prevents them from causing any real challenge to society (Bordo 1988).

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  The regime, like Foucault’s Panopticon, becomes a mechanism of self-regulation and self-surveillance which results in self-monitored docile bodies (Mansfield and McGinn 1993: 53).

  These findings of body dissatisfaction amongst female bodybuilders appear, at least ostensibly, to provide evidence supporting academic and other critics of female bodybuilding. The women’s relentless compulsion to ‘work on the body’, spurred on by an internalized judging self who is never satisfied by the mirror image, arguably eliminates any subversive potential the activity may
have possessed. In Fussell’s (1991) biography, bodybuilding is depicted as a form of armour against the world. Immersion in a life dedicated to muscle is understood as a form of escapism from personal insecurities and protection from getting hurt in relationships of love and intimacy. He declares: ‘as long as I hated myself, I still believed that it mattered (bodybuilding). My deepest fear was that it didn’t matter’ (ibid.: 248–9). To Fussell, Bordo and other critics, all bodybuilders are living under the illusion of control and empowerment, but subconsciously just want to be accepted for who ‘they really are’, and are in fact ‘craving recognition and self-assurance’ (Fisher 1997: 15). In this way bodybuilders are yet another victim of exploitative consumer capitalism, whose mantra decrees that we are never good enough as we are.

  In the context of these criticisms of female bodybuilding, it is interesting to note Lloyd’s (1996) suggestion that in order to liberate and empower women, physical activities need to transcend the ‘tyranny of slenderness’ and be ‘totally free from patriarchal pressures’. Hence, motivations to participate in and sustain fitness practices must be, and remain, ‘pure’. This criteria could easily be used to reinforce the above criticisms of female bodybuilding. However, in agreement with Grimshaw (1999), I believe that Lloyd’s (1996) proposal is somewhat naive.