Revelations of the Ruby Crystal

by Barbara Hand Clow

  “Good,” David responded. “Impeccable ethics, a clear mind, and a wise heart will protect you. Your mother has always simply loved you as you are, so you are protected by her love as well as my wisdom. I have noticed the same with Sarah. These influences must be exposed to the light of day for greater happiness in this exquisite world. We are nowhere if we refuse to see the truth, no matter how unpleasant it may be.”

  Both men hung up with a sigh—David’s for the burden he knew he was placing on his son and Simon’s for the weight of the journey he had ahead.

  23

  Old Friends

  Just before Thanksgiving, close relatives and friends began gathering in Boston for the wedding. Simon and his sister, Jennifer, moved into the Algonquin Club with David and Rose where they would host the rehearsal dinner on Friday night through reciprocal arrangements with their New York club.

  The Adamson house vibrated with anticipation. Sarah’s sister, Susan Marie, was to be the maid of honor, and Sarah’s best friend, Felicity Wallace, was to be the bridesmaid. All three women had their dresses fitted at the house Wednesday afternoon while Mary began preparations for Thanksgiving dinner the next day. After a light supper, Sarah spent some time alone with Susan and Felicity. Neither had seen Sarah since she went to Rome, so they were dying for the chance to find out all about Simon.

  “How’d you meet him?” Susan Marie asked. She and Sarah were sitting cross-legged on Sarah’s bed, while Felicity perched in a nest chair by the bed.

  “I’ll tell you the truth, but you can’t tell Mom and Dad. He picked me up in the street in Rome!” Sarah said. She hadn’t quite planned to tell them that part, but she was so nervous about the upcoming events she just blurted it out.

  “In the street, Sarah?” Felicity retorted. “How could you?”

  “It isn’t as bad as it sounds, but it is the truth,” Sarah said, remembering the first time she saw Simon. “This will sound like a cliché, but I knew he was the one when I first laid eyes on him. You hear about things like that and that’s what happened to me. There was another guy on the scene for a while. Do you remember the Pierleonis, Susan? Dad’s Italian friends who came to visit a few times when we were growing up?”

  “Of course I remember them,” Susan said. “When I heard Daddy took you to visit them in Tuscany, I was so jealous.”

  “You would have loved going to their castle. It’s hard to believe that anybody lives that way anymore, but they do,” Sarah said with passion. “Matilda Pierleoni took a fancy to me and introduced me to their oldest son, Armando, a really sexy guy, who almost stole me away from Simon! I can’t believe I was so cavalier, dating both of them at the same time. Last summer Simon got sent to Jerusalem on an assignment, and I was left alone in Rome with Armando.”

  “Dating two guys at the same time?” Felicity broke in. “That does not sound like the Sarah I know. When’s the last time you even dated one guy? I haven’t met Simon yet, but from what you’ve said, he’s impressive and perfect for you. So why’d you date this other guy?”

  Sarah leaned back onto her pillows. “Now that some time has gone by, I’ve had a chance to think about it. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn’t tell anybody, but you are my sister and my best friend. You’ve known me all these years, and you may have thought of me as a woman above it all?”

  Susan watched her sister, surprised at Sarah’s forthrightness. Usually she was so guarded. I wonder what she’s getting at, she thought. It’s as if she wants to confess something.

  “Well,” Sarah went on. “I found out that I knew a lot less about men than I thought. I’m about to be married to a man who offers me a very happy life. I need to talk about Armando with both of you because I need to warn you about some things, especially you, Susan.”

  Sarah smiled at her sister. Twenty-two-year old Susan was very beautiful and more delicate than Sarah; she more strongly resembled their mother. When they were growing up, Sarah had felt like she was too big, too athletic in comparison. Susan was the pretty one with sky blue eyes sparkling in her avid and demure face. Also, she was deliciously fleshy like a yummy baby with dewy and translucent skin. Felicity was twenty-five, a tawny beauty with intense brown eyes, high cheekbones, and a strong classic jaw. She was a champion tennis player who moved with the grace and awareness of a jaguar. Felicity had always been the meeting point between Sarah and Susan Marie, and she wanted to know what Sarah was getting at. In their teens, the three of them had made a pact to remain virgins until they married and promised to tell each other all their experiences with men.

  Felicity said, “Come on, Sarah, ’fess up.”

  “Armando is a painter, a very good one, and he is very charming,” Sarah began tentatively. “He photographed me reclining on a divan so he could paint me. But before I explain, I have to tell you that even before the photo session we had kissed several times. I was very attracted to him. It was the first time I ever really felt desire! He is handsome and sophisticated, and as the oldest son, will someday be a count. His parents live in the perfect castle in the perfect setting. I think I fell in love with the idea of living there. Old European glamour snowed me and I’m not proud of it; I was under a spell. If you ever run into someone like this, I hope you will be able to resist better than I did! Frankly I wasn’t sure which man I wanted, but I noticed Simon always made me feel strong and safe, while Armando always made me feel nervous and excited. Armando was debonair with seductive manners, while Simon was safe and sweet.

  Sarah sighed. It was harder than she had thought to admit her mistakes, even to her sister and best friend. “I was incredibly naive and should have listened to my instincts. The first time I was in Armando’s studio alone, he put the moves on me. I made him stop, but I should have been smart enough to never see him alone again. He apologized so convincingly that I went on to date him, and he behaved himself. The truth is I was so physically attracted to him that I did not see how dangerous he was.”

  Felicity and Susan stared at her, engrossed in Sarah’s story.

  “His mother, Matilda, invited me back to Tuscany when the painting was done, and . . .” Sarah paused. “I’m lucky I’m sitting here in one piece before my wedding. When he pulled the cloth off the painting, I saw he’d painted me as a nude! I was horrified! I felt like he’d raped me. Once he saw I was angry, he grabbed me and threw me on a divan where he did try to rape me.” Susan gasped, bringing her hand to her mouth; Felicity frowned, her hands curling into fists at her sides. Seeing their reactions, Sarah hastened to add, “He didn’t succeed, but he was strong and it went very far. It was a terrifying experience that could have ruined me. Worse than that, once he got going, I started to feel turned on. I’m telling you, lust is dangerous.”

  Felicity shook her head with eyes wide and reached over to the bed to take Sarah’s hand. Susan reached for Sarah’s arm to stroke it while she thought about what Sarah had said. She felt terrible for her sister, but at the same time she couldn’t quite understand her actions. I don’t think I would’ve seen this guy alone if I had feelings like that. Sarah has always been the strong one, the adventurous one. I always figured she’d get herself into trouble. Her thoughts were interrupted by Felicity. “Damn it, Sarah! What is wrong with that guy, what’s wrong with him?”

  “I think he’s crazy. He loses control of himself when life isn’t served to him on a silver platter. But regardless of that, I should have known better, and that’s why I am sharing this with you. Things are so meaningless these days that most people think the kind of rules we three adopted are passé. Hardly anybody looks at dating the way we do. I just wish I’d been able to pay attention to the part of me that knew better! I was wishy-washy because I felt foolish about my morals and my instincts, the things our parents taught us.”

  “Really?” Susan interrupted. “I never do because of my faith and the things Mom and Dad have taught me. Kevin is very understanding of the vow I made. He never pressures me because of our shared faith.” Kevin was Susan’s b
oyfriend, an older computer programmer she had met at church.

  Sarah was just about to tell Susan about her crisis of faith, but Felicity broke in again in a heated voice. “You want me to be honest with you, Adamson sisters, you naive Catholic goody-goodies who will someday find out about the real world? The dating scene is so bad I’ve considered being a lesbian. I made this pact with the two of you to keep my personal freedom! It can be dangerous to go out with guys these days! If they don’t get what they want, they can force you, slip you a drug, or both. I am surprised Armando didn’t do that to you, Sarah. I figured you two would be old maids and live at home. But you went to Rome and ran into the real world. Thank goodness you handled it as well as you did. You don’t feel guilty about this, do you? If you do, you shouldn’t!”

  Sarah shook her head. “I don’t feel guilty partly because I told Simon about it right away and he really helped me get over it. Like you, Felicity, he knows how it is out there because he’s had a lot of experience. So it is not about guilt, it’s about how weird things are with sex. The three of us have never talked about other dimensions, but this experience changed me. I think dark forces flow through Armando from other dimensions, forces he’s not aware of. When he tried to rape me, he was demonic; I’ve seen the face of evil.”

  Susan’s eyes were as wide as saucers; she’d never heard of anything like that before.

  Felicity ran Sarah’s comments through her mind. Wow, has Sarah changed! I can’t wait to meet Simon. She’d known the Adamson clan for years, and she’d always thought Sarah was like her father, a jolly guy on the surface who was sad inside.

  Felicity gazed intently into Sarah’s green eyes. “You’re leaving the Church, aren’t you? You see how complex things are and don’t believe the patriarchal story anymore? I wondered why you’re getting married at a meeting house, but I thought it must be what Simon wants. Are you finally exiting the Catholic guilt program?”

  Sarah smiled, but none of this was funny to Susan. “Sarah, you’re not, you’re not leaving the Church? I can’t believe it!”

  “Susan,” Sarah responded. “I think Mom and Dad must want me to tell you, since they haven’t yet. Yes, I’m leaving, and do you want to know why?”

  Susan stared at her sister with her mouth open, her pupils reduced to small points in recoil. I don’t know if I want to know. I suppose it’s because he’s a Jew. “Yes, I would like to know. Why? Because of Simon?”

  “No, not because of Simon,” Sarah answered. “In my studies I’ve learned that the Church has done more to suppress the story of Jesus than spread it. My deep relationship with Christ remains regardless of what the Church has done to His story. For me, the Church is devoid of the divine, so I can no longer be a part of it.” Seeing Susan’s wide, shocked eyes, Sarah took her sister’s hand. “It doesn’t mean things have to be different between us. Even Dad accepts my feelings.”

  I cannot believe anybody could change this much in a year, both Susan and Felicity were thinking from opposite perspectives. Felicity said, “William has accepted you leaving the Church? I think everybody is nuts these days. What is going on, Sarah?”

  “Felicity, I’m amazed by my dad’s latitude. Maybe it’s because he likes Simon and his family; maybe it is because I dropped Armando. He met him in Italy and couldn’t stand him—even though I thought he would be happy about us dating at the time. Maybe it’s because he’s changing too. All the articles Simon has been writing about the priestly sexual abuse crisis have really shaken Dad up and forced him to face it.”

  Felicity’s eyes narrowed as she observed Sarah and Susan. I never thought I’d see so much change in this family, never. Her parents were both anthropologists, more interested in studying and analyzing religious beliefs than in practicing them, and she took an interest in Sarah and Susan to study how religion influenced them. Felicity had never had the same rules imposed on her because her family was more liberal, yet her closeness with Sarah influenced her thoughts about sexuality. When all three girls were teenagers, however, Felicity had sometimes resented the way Sarah and Susan were protected from the world. Believing in the obsolete teachings of the Church seemed to make life so simple.

  “Sarah!” Susan screeched. “I just can’t believe you’re leaving the Church. Dad would never do what you’re doing, Mom never would; I never will. I just have to say that. I’m happy you are getting married, but you’ve ended up where you are because you broke the rules and dated someone outside the Church. Just think if Patrick were here today. What would he think?”

  Felicity wanted to tell Susan to watch it. “Susan, don’t you think you are being too hard on Sarah?”

  Before Susan could answer, Sarah interjected, “We can’t know how Patrick would’ve lived his life. I’ll share something with you if you’ll promise me you will be more patient and understanding with me, especially now.” Susan took a deep breath and looked into Sarah’s soft eyes and nodded her agreement. “For me Simon is like the return of the older brother we lost. I missed having Patrick in our childhood, and often I’ve wanted an older brother who would watch out for me and love me. Maybe you are the same? Or maybe you have not needed an older brother because you always had me. I think that is partly why I fell in love with Simon—he’s so nurturing. Now we’ve grown up and you’ll probably keep your faith and marry in the Church. I sure hope so because then somebody will make Mom and Dad happy! This is not easy for me, marrying outside the Church, but I have to follow my conscience.”

  Felicity was glad that the sisters had made peace for the moment, but she couldn’t help but think: wait until Sarah meets Kevin! Felicity quickly added, “Good, I’m glad you two won’t have a cat fight. I hope I won’t lose you as a friend, Susan. I think it doesn’t matter whether anybody is in the Church, but even you will have to face the corruption; I’m happy I don’t have to deal with it.”

  24

  Thanksgiving 2012

  On Thanksgiving Day, Kevin McCarty came early to meet Sarah before the arrival of Simon’s family. Susan stood proudly by Kevin as he took Sarah’s hand and said with bumbling enthusiasm, “I can’t believe it, Sarah. You are as beautiful as my Susan, but in a different way. How’d you pull it off, William, two such gorgeous daughters?” William smiled and went to the kitchen for a Scotch.

  Sarah looked him over as if appraising a horse, which put him on guard. Kevin was thoroughly Irish with reddish cheeks, recessed blue eyes, a small pot belly, and large teeth. He looks like he just got off the boat from Dublin! A computer programmer slapped over a jolly gnome like a cheese sandwich wrapped in Saran Wrap. How old is he, forty? He sure is easy with Daddy. “Thanks for the compliment, but you have the prettiest daughter.”

  Sarah tried to be conversational as they followed her father into the kitchen. “Susan says you met at church and you program computers?” she began while continuing to examine him.

  “I’m a programmer for IBM and we did meet in church. That doesn’t compare with meeting a hot reporter in Rome and snagging him quick!” As Susan walked away to help her mother prepare the meal, “Susan and I have no plans yet, but I am serious about her. That’s why I was invited today. Weddings often spawn proposals, so perhaps your wedding will be the final push?” He smirked and turned himself slightly to get a better view of Sarah’s chest. “You are wearing a beautiful diamond. Is it a family heirloom?”

  Sarah felt very uncomfortable and invaded. Whenever he spoke her ruby vibrated with the warning of what was really being said beneath his words: I’ve waited a long time to find a virgin! I’ve got Susan if I want her, but I’d rather have you, babe. You better not stand in my way. Sarah winced and tried to maintain her composure. “Yes, it was our grandmother’s. So you are thinking of proposing? If you’ll forgive me, since she’s my only sister, how old are you, Kevin?”

  Kevin flushed and sat up straighter. “I’m forty-one and in our tradition the man being older is best. I’m established and can support a family, so she’d be well taken care o
f. Seems to me I heard Simon is quite a bit older than you?”

  At this point, Sarah was so mad that she couldn’t detect the weird double voice. She replied curtly, “I think I hear someone at the door. Thanks for the little chat.” As she walked away, he checked out her ass undulating under her black skirt. That’s one thing they both have, a world-class ass. The front hall was filling when she saw Simon hanging up his trench coat. As she went to him, a tall, intense, and striking woman touched her shoulder, a feminine version of Simon.

  “Jennifer?” Sarah asked.

  The woman smiled broadly, her dark eyes warm and open. “You must be Sarah. I am so thrilled to meet you! Simon has told me all about you. I never imagined he’d fall so deeply in love! Now that I see you I can see why. You’re absolutely beautiful. He’s told you I’m a Parisian high-fashion photographer? You’re beyond anyone I have done. Wow! Go, little brother, go!”

  Sarah laughed and then blushed, which made her even more becoming. Simon took her hand and kissed her on the forehead. “See what a beauty, Jen? That’s not why I love her, but it sure helped me pick her out of the crowd in Rome.” He looked at both of them. “Sarah, Jennifer’s wedding present is to do a study of us this year. Maybe in Paris, maybe Barcelona.”

  Jennifer nodded. “I would love to do that whenever it works for you. But for the next few days I want to be the sister and not the photographer for once!”

  The three of them walked into the living room where David and Rose stood with Mary and William. Simon said to Jennifer, “Our families really like each other, have from the first even though we didn’t give them much time. Come meet Sarah’s parents.”