This Time Around (Maybe)

by Fernando, Chantal

  “Working hard, or hardly working?” I ask in a dry tone as I walk up towards him. He glances up and grins, before returning his attention back to the phone.

  “I’m pretty busy, as you can see,” he says, pointing to the empty, spotless bar. He slides his phone into his jeans and looks back up at me, running his finger through his goatee.

  “You can head home early if you want,” I offer, knowing he would love to have the extra time with his daughter.

  “You sure?” he asks, slapping me on my back.

  “Yeah, I think I can handle the excitement all alone.”

  Tag chuckles, “I’m sure you can. I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

  “See ya, buddy,” I say, taking out some of the paperwork I have to get done tonight.

  Thinking that this was going to be a boring uneventful night, it all changes an hour later when Taiya herself walks into the bar. Tight jeans and top, my gaze can’t help but roam a little south.

  “Eyes up here, Ryan,” she says, pursing her pink lips.

  “That’s twice in a week you’ve dropped by, Taiya. You miss me?” I ask. My voice is teasing but laced with hope. A man can dream, right?

  “Yeah, like a disease. My lawyer just rang and said you didn’t sign the papers,” she says, crossing her arms over her chest. I try not to glance down at her breasts but fail.

  “That is correct, yes.” I didn’t sign them, and I don’t intend on signing them. That piece of paper is the last thing holding us together, our last tie. No way in hell I’m going to sever it. I’m going to hold on for as long as I can.

  “You said you would take care of it,” she says accusingly.

  I sigh and turn to the fridge behind me, reaching down to pull out her favourite soft drink. I place it in front of her, and then continue the conversation, “I lied.”

  “Yes, you seem to make a habit of that, don’t you, Ryan?” she says with a scoff, pushing away the drink with her hand, rejecting my peace offering. She taps her glittery nails on the table, her eyes... daring me. To say what? I have no idea what’s going on in that head of hers right now, but I intend to find out. I used to know what she’s thinking, know her better than herself, but right now, she has me stumped. I’m looking forward to getting to know her all over again, inside and out. I can’t keep my eyes off her. I think I could stare at her for hours, noticing subtle changes since I last saw her. Smiling at things that are exactly the same. My eyes are hungry for the sight of her.

  Wanting something so badly, having it right in front of me but not being able to touch it? Hell on Earth.

  “I never lied to you, Taiya,” I tilt my head. “I was going to sign them. Until I changed my mind. And I’ve never lied to you in the past, if you want to get into that right now.”

  “I’m good, thanks,” she says quietly, glancing around the bar. “Nice place.”

  “Thanks,” I say softly. Taiya was with me when we bought the bar, and for the grand opening. It’s changed a fair bit since then, as we made more money to do it up. “Did you find an apartment?”

  Her eyes flare, surprised. “How did you know I was out looking?”

  “Stopped by your house but you were gone. You know I have plenty of room at my place,” I offer, adding a charming smile and a raised eyebrow.

  Her lip twitches. Such a small gesture, yet the best I’ve gotten so far. I’m considering it progress. “Sure, live with my ex-husband. I’m sure that’s a great idea,” she says sarcastically.

  “Husband,” I correct.

  “What?”

  “I’m not your ex-husband. I’m your husband,” I repeat.

  She lifts her shoulder in a shrug, trying to play it off like she doesn’t care, but I don’t miss the flash of anger in her eyes. “You don’t act like my husband, and a piece of paper doesn’t change that.”

  “Ouch,” I say, putting my hand over my heart. “I’m glad a piece of paper doesn’t change anything for you, because I’m not signing those papers.”

  She is silent for a moment before she responds. “You never used to be this selfish, Ryan,” she says softly, looking down into her drink. My heart hurts in that moment; the pressure actually burns.

  “Yeah, well, I used to have you,” I reply quietly, now looking down myself. When I glance up at her, she’s already watching me. Her eyes speak for her, letting me see much more than she would ever say out loud. I hurt her enough that it perhaps changed her, but my Taiya is still standing in front of me.

  “You’re going to put this on me?” she says, wrinkling her nose. My hand aches to reach out and touch her, to run my finger along the curve of her jaw, my thumb across the bottom of her lip. But I don’t. She’s not ready for that… yet.

  “No. Does it matter?” I ask her, my eyes darting to the door as a customer walks in. She turns her head to follow my line of sight, giving me a glimpse of the tattoo behind her ear. The letter R she got tattooed right after I proposed to her. The letter is in the centre of an infinity sign, and has a little red heart connected to it.

  “Sign the papers, Ryan,” she says, sounding resigned. I reach out and trace her tattoo with my finger. She shivers at my touch, before pulling away so she’s out of my reach.

  “We can talk about it over dinner,” I suggest, needing to be around her anyway I can. When it comes to her, I will take whatever I can get. She purses her lips but doesn’t say yes or no, just flashes me a curious look as she turns to walk out. My eyes follow her until she leaves my sight.

  *****

  “What are you doing here?” Taiya asks as she open the door to her house.

  I try to hide my nervousness and put on a smile. “Last night, you said we could talk. Over dinner.”

  She gapes. “No, you said we could talk over dinner. I didn’t respond. My silence was a no.”

  “Well, you should have been clearer.”

  “How much clearer could I have been? I don’t want to have dinner with you, Ryan. What are we going to do? Reminisce on the old times? Like when you ripped my heart out and stomped on it? That’s a good place to start,” she says, hurting me with each word.

  I swallow before answering, “We had good times too.”

  She nods once. “Sure we did. But the bad moments kind of overshadow the good ones.”

  Does she know what she’s doing to me with each comment? If she wants payback, she’s getting it tenfold. “I don’t believe that’s true.”

  “Yes, well, I tried to be a good wife to you. I was always honest, faithful, and loyal. I wasn’t perfect but I tried my best,” she shrugs like it doesn’t matter.

  “You were perfect,” I cut in before she can finish her tirade.

  She drops her gaze. “Right, well, I guess perfect wasn’t good enough for you.”

  I sigh, “It wasn’t you, Taiya—”

  Now, it’s her turn to cut me off. “It wasn’t me; it was you. Oh, trust me, Ryan. I know it was you. That’s why we won’t be going to dinner. If you care about me at all, sign those papers. Let me go.”

  With that parting shot, she closes the door in my face.

  Chapter Three

  “I’m this close to forging your signature, Ryan,” comes a familiar voice. I stop in my tracks and turn around, grinning when I lay my eyes on her.

  “Are you following me now? That’s kind of hot,” I tease, devouring her with my eyes. It’s been a long two weeks since I’ve laid my eyes on her, and I’ve been going insane. Trying to stay away, like she wanted, but not being able to get her out of my mind.

  “No, unfortunately, the fates are out to get me,” she grits out. “Vindictive bitches that they are.”

  “How so?” I ask, leaning forward. My brow furrows at the expression on her stunning face.

  “I didn’t know you lived in this building. I just saw Summer and Reid,” she says, visibly cringing.

  “Are you saying...?” Could my luck really be that good? I try to hide the smile now forming on my lips.

  “That I now live on t
he fourth floor,” she says, blinking a few times. She’s wearing workout clothes, and has her curly hair tied away from her face. “Reid told me your apartment number,” she adds. It’s like she read my mind because I was just about to ask that question. She makes it sound like she’s going to spend her days avoiding me, but she’s here in front of me right now, so I’m not going to complain.

  “You living here by yourself?” I ask slowly, hoping the answer is yes. If she’s living with a guy, I’m not going to take it so well. I may even go ‘Hulk smash’ on the bastard.

  “Nah, I have a roommate. So listen,” she says, changing the subject. “I think we should be civil. Summer invited me out for a drink, and she seems really nice so I’d like to go. Only if it won’t make things weird,” she rambles, twisting her hands together. I feel like jumping for joy right now. Taiya is going to be around me pretty much every day (considering I’m going to find any excuse to bump into her), and Summer made her feel welcome, bringing her into our inner circle.

  Best wing woman ever!

  Summer’s going to get a lifetime supply of apple juice boxes for this one.

  “I think it’s great, and I’m glad you’re gonna be around,” I say truthfully, trying to hide my excitement. I mentally picture myself fist pumping.

  Her eyes narrow suspiciously. “We can try to be friends.”

  “Friends,” I reply, trying to keep the venom out of my tone. “Sure,” I add, cringing with the lie. Friends is better than her jumping down my throat with her harsh words and throwing the past in my face, like she did the last time I saw her. I would say anything right now to get a second chance with her, and I’m not above playing dirty to get what I want. I’d do anything to go back in time, to be how we were. And I’m not above grovelling.

  “Great,” she says, a genuine smile appearing on her face. A dimple pops up in her cheek, and my eyes are drawn to it. I fucking love that dimple. I remember when I used to lick the indentation with my tongue.

  “So where are you working now?” I ask her, looking away and leaning on the wall of the building. My jeans are suddenly feeling a little tighter than they were a few minutes ago.

  Her eyes brighten, and I know she must have found something she loves. Dance. She must have found a job dancing somewhere.

  “I’m teaching jazz dance classes at the rec centre,” she says, smiling widely. She loves to dance, always has. She’s amazing at it too.

  “I’ll bet you love that,” I say fondly, smiling down at her.

  She nods her head, and shifts on her feet. “I do. I might not own my own studio yet, but at least I’m still dancing.”

  Taiya’s dream ever since I can remember has been to own her own dance studio.

  She glances around. “I gotta head out, but I guess I’ll see you around.”

  “All right,” I say softly, watching her walk away.

  “Oh and Ryan?” she suddenly calls out.

  “Yeah?”

  “Sign the papers,” she says, waving before she disappears. I grit my teeth at her wanting the divorce so damn badly.

  I head to Reid and Summer’s, not even bothering to knock.

  “Sum!” I call out, walking into the kitchen and grabbing a bottle of water. I shut the fridge with my hip, and turn to see her walk out of her room.

  She flashes me a grin and holds her hand to her heart. “I think I’m in love.”

  “I’d hope so,” I say dryly as I open the lid and take a long sip.

  “I mean with Taiya! She’s so freaking hot,” she says, sighing dramatically.

  “Don’t swoon on me,” I tell her with a small chuckle. She’s not telling me anything that I don’t already know. Taiya is one of those women who will always be beautiful, at any age. She has the sort of beauty to bring a man to his knees. Trust me; I know from experience.

  “Hey bro,” Reid greets as he walks out of the bedroom. He’s bare chested and has a soft look on his face. He definitely just got laid. He leans down and kisses Summer on the forehead, like he hasn’t seen her all day, instead of a few seconds. If possible, it makes me miss Taiya even more.

  “Did you see her?” he asks.

  I nod, and grin. “This building. Really, what are the chances?”

  Summer smirks smugly. “Yeah, I might have had something to do with that.”

  Reid and I both glance at her in surprise. “What do you mean?” I ask warily, leaning back on the counter.

  “I may have run into her. I introduced myself, and told her I was Reid’s girlfriend, and then mentioned that there was a gorgeous apartment available…” she trails off, wiggling her eyebrows and looking mighty pleased with herself. I shake my head at her, close the space between us and wrap my arm around her shoulder.

  “I owe you,” I tell her, kissing her on top of her head.

  “And I plan to collect,” she says with an evil grin. Of course she does.

  “What are you two up to? Besides fucking yourselves to death that is. Ouch!” I say as Reid slaps me on the back of my head.

  “Summer has classes, but I’m doing nothing. Want to bond?” he asks, uncrossing his arms. He kisses Summer on the mouth, and we say our byes as she walks out. Reid eyes her ass as she departs, clearly enjoying the view. I wonder if they’re still in their honeymoon stage or if they are going to be like this forever. For some reason, I’d go with the latter.

  “Yeah, I do,” I reply, knowing that we’re going to end up either playing video games or going to the gym to spar. Truthfully, I wouldn’t mind either one right now. Sometimes it just feels nice to have some alone time with my brother to bond.

  “Gym?” my brother asks, grabbing a banana out of the fruit bowl and peeling it.

  “Sure,” I reply. I could definitely use the tension release. I haven’t slept with anyone since Taiya slapped me. And I don’t think I can consider that as foreplay.

  He pauses. “Then I’ll kick your ass on the PS4,” he pauses, “after I take a shower.”

  “Plan to lose,” I say, smirking.

  Reid takes a bite, chews and swallows. “We’ll see about that”

  “I like a challenge,” I tell him, grabbing my own banana and taking a bite.

  “Copycat,” Reid says, throwing his peel in the bin.

  “I’m having a flashback to our childhood,” I muse.

  The good parts, anyway.

  “Right. Shall we go? You can tell me more lame jokes on the way,” Reid says, grinning playfully.

  My mouth curves into an identical grin.

  He loves my jokes.

  *****

  “Did you bring food?” I ask Summer as soon as she walks into the room.

  “Hello to you too,” she says, swatting me on the head with one of her books.

  My stomach growls. “Reid, make your woman cook,” I pout while complaining.

  Summer and Reid kiss, and she giggles as he pulls her down onto his lap, abandoning his remote control. Looks like game time is over. I roll my eyes, hoping that they aren’t like this around other company. No wonder they don’t get many visitors.

  “Food’s on the table,” Summer says when she pulls herself away from Reid, her brown eyes smiling.

  Standing up, I grin at her and head straight for the kitchen. When I see exactly what she brought, I walk back into the lounge room scowling. “What is this?” I ask, waving around the bag.

  “Salad,” she answers, smirking. She pushes away some brown strands of hair off her forehead.

  “Since when do we eat salad?” I deadpan. Now don’t get me wrong, I will eat salad as a side dish. It’s meant to be a side dish, not a whole meal. That’s just wrong. I’m not trying out for Australia’s Next Top Model any time soon, and my body is in peak shape anyway.

  “Clean eating,” is all she says. I blink once, before darting my eyes to my brother, who is now outright laughing, his body shaking silently.

  “You’ve lost your balls, brother,” I mutter, peering into the bag at the offending salad. All I
see is green. A whole lot of green.

  “Is there at least chicken in it?” I ask hopefully. I could go for some chicken.

  “No,” she replies, pursing her lips.

  I narrow my eyes at her. “If you wanted me to stop coming here, you just had to say so, you didn’t have to go to such drastic measures.”

  Summer bursts out laughing, almost elbowing Reid in the face as she doubles over. The bastard would have deserved it, but he moves out of the way just in time.

  “We’re eating healthily, Ryan,” Summer says, standing up and walking past me and into the kitchen. I glance back at my brother, who is running his hands through his blond hair. I don’t say anything, letting my eyes do the talking for me. Reid’s resounding chuckle lets me know he got my message loud and clear. My stomach growls, so I stalk back into the kitchen and make myself a sandwich.

  “So when are you seeing Taiya?” I ask her as I slather on some mayonnaise. She opens her salad and forks a piece of lettuce.

  “This weekend. I said I’d message her so we can organise something. We’ll probably end up going out for drinks.”

  “She loves to dance,” I tell her, a small smile playing on my lips.

  “Perfect,” Summer beams, lifting the fork to her mouth.

  I clear my throat. “Let me know where you guys end up.” Summer puts her fork down and pauses, studying me. A slow smile spreading across her mouth.

  “You’re just gonna show up wherever we are?”

  “Yep,” I say, popping the P. “Reid and Me will be there.”

  “Double trouble,” she murmurs, taking out a piece of chicken.

  I gasp. “There is chicken in there!”

  She smirks. “Of course there is.” Before she can move, I stick my fingers into her salad and pull out a chuck of chicken, shoving it in my mouth.

  “Hey!” she snaps, pushing her plate out of my reach.

  “Serves you right,” I tell her, chewing the piece appreciatively.

  “Who knows where your hands have been,” she says, raising an eyebrow.

  Only on myself. But she really doesn’t need to know that.

  “I don’t think you need to worry about that,” I reply in a dry tone.