Living With the Dead: The Bitter Seasons

by Joshua Guess

  And our folks down by the river will have a safe place to live, right next to us.

  Today's a good day.

  at 11:56 AM

  Wednesday, September 8, 2010

  Cancel Red Alert

  Posted by Josh Guess

  Well....Aaron is here, and he's alone.

  The team managed a pickup yesterday, but due to a zombie attack sometime between when we got the email from him and when our people made the pickup, a mob of zombies killed all of his people. He only escaped by falling right next to a truck, and managed to hide in the undercarriage about half a block from the rendezvous point. When he heard the team drive up and start clearing out the herd, he made his presence known.

  He's an interesting guy. In his early thirties, he's got a very similar personality to my own. Loves comics and anime, tabletop gaming, and has a hard vein of practicality in him sufficient to the task of survival. He's also been a student off and on for most of his life, and has a zeal for teaching. Which is awesome, because as many of you know, my sister was our primary teacher until she left for the safer confines of Jack's compound in Michigan. I hope he likes it here, because we need someone who knows how to teach without trying to reproduce the broken and mind-numbing system that we used to have.

  He's not showing much pain at the loss of his people. I don't know if that's because he barely knew them, or he's just been numbed to the pain of loss as some folks are, or if he's just holding it in until he can get some privacy, but he seems to be dealing.

  He's pushing Will Price around in his wheelchair at present, getting a guided tour. Patrick has taken this rare time away from the Lieutenant to come talk to me about him. Most of us think that he is sincere in his desire to be a part of us, and the idea behind him living and working with Patrick was to see if my big Alaskan chum could spot any duplicity in him, catch him trying to case us out for information to take back to his fellow soldiers in Richmond.

  I am happy to report that Pat hasn't seen a thing to cause suspicion. Will is apparently what he seems; a soldier sent out on a mission that ended in tragedy for those with him. He wants to live here, be one of us, and I think he should be welcomed.

  Some of the people around here have wondered why he should be looked on with such concern when many others were brought here and essentially handed the keys to the kingdom. The answer is simple if loaded with implications: when other people came here, they were as refugees looking for a place to survive. When he came here, it was because he was sent to our town by a group that possibly has the resources to obliterate or conquer us in a matter of hours.

  I can handle a large group of individuals who just want safety. The dangers they bring are individual and dealt with in the same manner. If they were to pose any sort of group problem, chances are that it would be a social one, dealing more with issues of tolerance rather than control. We've seen that happen, sadly. More than once.

  But a single man who represents a larger group of very powerful people? People with the means to strike from miles away, to kill dozens at a go? That one man could mean death or slavery for all of us. It's not the flock of birds in the field ahead of you that should worry you, but rather the snake hiding by itself in the tall grass.

  So today is another good day. I think we'll get the council together, and see about removing the restrictions from Will.

  Huh. Just heard a gunshot, and it sounded really close to the house. That's unusual. I can hear some people yelling. Maybe a few zombies got inside the perimeter. Better go check it out.

  at 10:37 AM

  Thursday, September 9, 2010

  He Didn't Have a Name

  Posted by Josh Guess

  I haven't been back to sleep since my post yesterday. I can't even begin to describe the horror of the last day, but I have to get out the events. Writing has always been my way to relieve my mental pressure. That's why this blog exists. How to begin?

  Where I left off, I guess.

  I went outside when I heard the gunfire and people yelling. I thought maybe there was a breach in the wall, perhaps a few zombies got through. I was terribly wrong.

  The scene I came upon less than thirty yards from my house froze me solid for a few seconds. There was Patrick, Aaron, Will, my wife Jess and a Big man in an army uniform. Pat and Aaron were crowded around Jess, who was laying on the ground covered in blood. Will was kneeling painfully at the side of the man wearing fatigues, checking for a pulse.

  I couldn't understand what I was seeing. It made no sense to me.

  Pat, Aaron and I all seemed to move at once, hauling jess up into Will's forgotten wheelchair, and we rushed her around the corner to the clinic that was once my mother's house. I don't know how long we were there, or how much blood Jess lost, but I was at her side the entire time Evans and Gabrielle were working on her. I held her hand and prayed, begged to god that he save her. A god I hadn't talked to or fully believed in for a long, long time. I wept at the agony I saw in her eyes as my friends pushed themselves beyond their limits to save her life, and that of our unborn child.

  Hours, it seemed like. It might have even taken that long in reality.

  But she's alive. Our baby didn't make it.

  Gabrielle didn't want me to look at him, but I had to. I couldn't let him go without at least touching those tiny hands at least once. I needed the reassurance that he had been. I don't know if I can explain it, so I don't think I will try more than that.

  Jessica was unconscious by the time the baby passed, so she didn't have to deal with the immediacy of it. I don't know how I am going to be able to tell her when she comes to. Jess had always been indifferent bordering on not wanting children, but when we found out she was pregnant, things changed. She changed. I don't know if I can bear to be the one to crush the joy in her heart as it has been in mine.

  I found out much later what happened.

  Jess met up with Aaron, Pat and Will as she was coming home. The army guy came out of the south woods, yelling at Will. He got close to them, yelling about Will coming back home. Pat and Aaron were unarmed, but tried to give Jess and Will cover with their bodies. The guy drew a gun, but Will was prepared. He pushed himself out of his chair to snag a rock from the ground and to get out from behind his two protectors.

  Will threw perfectly, crushed the guy's throat. Pat and Aaron were shocked enough that both of them moved from where they were standing, and that made an open path to Jess. I would like to think that the shot was just wild and random, that no human being left alive could possibly shoot a pregnant woman on purpose. I don't know. But regardless of his intent, the result was clear.

  Evans took a look at the man's corpse not too long ago. He says that there are deep bruises in the shape of fingers around his windpipe. I guess Will was doing more than just checking for a pulse. Good for him.

  I need to go check on Jess again. If this seems flat and without my sometime habit of writing elaborately and with pretty words, it's because I just can't find the right ones to express what is pouring through my head right now.

  I have to go.

  at 7:40 AM

  Death to Aggressors

  Posted by Treesong

  I've known Josh in passing for years now, but I've really gotten to know him much better in the months since the world around us has crashed and burned. Usually, Josh has been the one to call for more security, more weapons, more draconian responses to the mindlessly hostile world in which we now live. And usually I, along with a few of our friends, have been the one to call for communication, for cooperation, for even tempers and merciful responses, even in the presence of brutal acts and heartless people.

  But you know what? I'm running out of patience, running out of understanding, running out of mercy.

  We live in a world where most of humanity has either outright died or been turned into some horrible mockery of life we now call "Zombies." And here, in a small corner of the Heartland of America, a small community of us are doing what we can to band together
with other peace-loving survivors and build a new life for ourselves. Our goals may at times seem selfish — and may at times BE selfish — but we are part of a grassroots effort to rebuild humanity from the ashes of a global apocalypse.

  After all that's happened — the collapse of civilization, the death of most of humanity — how can any sane person dare to violate the peace among the living, to invade a settlement of survivors, to bring needless death into a world already overflowing with the living dead?

  There's a simple answer to this question. No sane person can do these things. And no sane person can tolerate these things.

  I am a peace-loving man. I simply want to live here with my loved ones and scratch out some small measure of peace and comfort and survival in a world that has pretty much literally gone to hell.

  If you live outside of these hallowed walls, I don't care who you are, or what you believe in, or what you're doing with your lives, as long as you leave the non-aggressive survivors of our land in peace.

  But make no mistakes. I have taken the lives of both Zombies and the living in defense of my people. And I would do so again without hesitation, without question, without remorse, in defense of my people.

  If you, too, wish to live in a society of peace, a society of rights, a society of justice, then by all means, join us in our effort to build such a society.

  But if you come to us as an aggressor, with murder and conquest in your heart, then you had better pray to whatever God you believe in that your death will be swift and painless. Because if you come here to violate our peace, to take our land, to kill our children, then you have forsaken all pretense at humanity, and humanity will forsake you in return. The way I feel today, if anyone else tries to invade this compound, I may personally nail them to a post outside our front gates just to watch them die. It would also send a message to any other would-be aggressors that we don't take such murderous behavior lightly.

  This might be a good time to point out that I've just learned yesterday that my lover is with child. I found out this otherwise joyous news only hours before the tragedy Josh has written about. There are also other male-female couples in this compound, and any of them who aren't with child currently might end up being so in the coming weeks and months. Unless, of course, this incident scares them away from it. It is for these children that we are building this new world, and it is for these children that I pledge my life in defense of this community.

  If any of you come to this community with malice in your hearts, then Gods help me, I will kill you all. We've worked too hard and come too far to have our effort at a new life ended by mindless monsters who don't have the good sense to approach other survivors in a spirit of peace and cooperation. If you come to us with weapons drawn, then by the Gods, we will end you, and we will use your own weapons to end whoever sent you.

  at 12:36 PM

  Friday, September 10, 2010

  Busy Away the Tears

  Posted by Josh Guess

  An update.

  Jess is devastated, as you would expect. I am not doing much better, but I have had things to do and keeping busy has at least distracted me from losing the baby enough that I don't head off to Richmond to start killing people.

  Will has been confined since just after the attack. None of us hold him responsible, but neither do we trust that he won't go out and try to get to Richmond himself. Pat questioned him about the man that shot my wife, and Will says that the guy was a PFC named Steve Parker, which matches the military ID we found on the body. He looked pretty thin and rough, like he had been living out in the open for a while. My guess is that he struck out on his own looking for the downed helicopter, and was probably watching us for a few days before he made his way in. He looked pretty starved, so I can only imagine what the sight and smell of all our food did to his mind.

  No, I'm not apologizing or making excuses for him. He shot my wife and caused her to lose our baby. If I could, I would bring him back to life just to kill him myself.

  Everyone is pretty distraught. Jess is loved around here in a way I can never be, and people are pissed. Courtney sort of took over, trying to calm people down while making sure that the compound was secure. She was the one to have Pat lock up Will, and she searched the body of PFC Parker. She wants to know what happened just as badly as the rest of us do, and she is a lot more suspicious of Will in this than I am. But considering that Will was the one who took action, probably saving Jessie's life, combined with the fact that he has been under lock and key since he got here, I just don't see how he could have been involved.

  I think on Courtney's part that she feels like she has to do something, and that wonderful mind of hers has to consider all possibilities equally. I certainly understand it, and since she's a lot more able to think dispassionately than I am right now, I trust her judgement.

  This does mean that some time down the road we are going to have to do something about the soldiers in Richmond. It's something that we will be discussing in council soon, I am sure...

  Steve, Courtney's husband, nearly broke his hand. He was there at the clinic with us, helping Evans and Gabby in any way he could. When things calmed down, my normally relaxed and calm friend went nuts, and punched a wall with everything he had. Said he was just frustrated that there wasn't more he could do.

  The friends I have, I would never trade for anything. They have been rocks for me to hang on to, and their support has meant more to me than I will ever be able to say.

  at 12:24 PM

  Saturday, September 11, 2010

  Together

  Posted by Josh Guess

  Jess is still resting up, and will likely be off her feet for a few days. I am taking the rest of today off to spend time with her, and this post will be short.

  Not a lot of new info to be had. Will is out and about now, since none of us think that he had anything to do with the man who attacked my wife. Will says that it is likely the man was sent this way looking for the crashed helicopter, that it has been done before by the soldiers in Richmond.

  I am only writing a post at all today because we had some big news come in.

  This has been a quiet time for zombie attacks, thank god, and that means that work all around the adjoining neighborhoods is moving along well. We've also been able to get some people out to find some basic construction materials for our power plant. Thank god my brother knows how to make concrete...

  This big news is that the factory that houses all of those turbines is beginning to clear up. That means that a group can be sent to it to start bringing them this way. Patrick has volunteered for the trip, and he is going to be heading out with a dozen others on monday. We can't let this opportunity slip by us, especially considering that satellite photos show a large number of trucks available at the factory to transport them...maybe we will send more than thirteen people...

  If Pat and the folks that go with him can manage to find enough fuel, they will be able to bring back enough turbines to keep even our more power-hungry endeavors running at full strength. So much can go wrong, but it gives me something to research and plan, something to work on.

  But my brother is doing that right now. I will help again in the morning. Today, I will join my wife on one of the hospital beds we lugged over, and we will mourn together.

  at 10:09 AM

  Monday, September 13, 2010

  Freedom and Ashes

  Posted by Josh Guess

  Patrick and our group of volunteers are heading out today, heading toward the factory that has the turbines we need to build our power stations.

  Pat really doesn't want to leave. He has been one of our best friends for what seems like forever, and he has been trying to be there for Jess and I after the shooting and loosing the baby. And while both of us have taken a lot of solace in his being there for us, living in the zombie apocalypse has taught us that hard practicality and taking advantage of opportunities trumps whatever personal tragedies we face.

  Because the facts a
re simple. We love Pat and will miss him, but his staying here will do nothing to help Jess heal faster, and will not bring back our child.

  But his going will mean a chance at sustainable power, which will benefit everyone here immensely. Most prominent in my mind at present is the fact that the clinic will be able to grow into something closer to a hospital, since with all that electricity we will be able to run x-ray machines and the like. Frontier medicine only suits us as long as it's required by circumstance...

  Which leads me to something interesting.