Wolf Bound

by Leisl Leighton

  Eloise reached out and patted her knee. ‘Don’t worry. We wouldn’t ask you to do that again.’ Her gaze darted to Patrick.

  ‘Sorry, I shouldn’t have suggested it.’

  ‘It’s okay.’

  ‘You’re being a martyr again. You need to stop it.’

  ‘I’ll stop it when you stop it.’

  Adam glared at her, fingers clenching in his lap, itching to do what his Were nature—and his Trickster side—was urging him to do: touch her. He could feel her need—it was obvious just from the tension in his body let alone the way he was looking at her. But she’d made it clear she didn’t want him to touch her, so he didn’t. Annoying man. She really wanted his touch right now. And she didn’t care how contrary that was.

  His fingers were clenching and unclenching in his lap, his jaw tight, his eyes deeply worried.

  She couldn’t stand it. She reached over and put her hand over his. ‘It’s okay.’

  He stilled. Relaxed.

  ‘Don’t worry about me.’

  He made a clucking sound. ‘Can’t do that. It’s my job.’

  ‘No, it’s not.’

  ‘Once your Shadow, always your Shadow.’ His lips widened into his cheeky grin. ‘You can never get rid of me, you know. Even in partial death.’

  His gallows humour would usually have had her chuckling. But instead of laughing, she just clenched her fingers around his. ‘I don’t want to get rid of you.’

  Patrick was watching her, as was Eloise, both of them with a strange expression on their face. But she didn’t care. For the rest of the journey, she sat there silently, her hand wrapped around Adam’s ghostly one, garnering a strange sense of strength and peace from his almost-not-there touch.

  Adam held onto her. Something inside him surged forward at her touch, the neediness in it speaking to a need in him that he’d held back for so long. This was more than the sexual attraction he’d always felt for her. It was something deeper.

  If he didn’t know better, he’d call it the mating bond. But that couldn’t be right, because he was no longer bonded to his wolf, and there was no mating bond without his wolf heart.

  Whatever it was, Adam didn’t want to let it go. Didn’t want to let Shelley go.

  The problem was, at some stage he was going to have to, because as he held her, he felt the secret need she kept hidden inside, the part of her she was too afraid to speak out loud.

  She wanted out.

  Somehow, after all this was over, he was going to have to make sure she got what she wanted, even if it killed something precious and newly awakened inside him.

  ***

  ‘What are you all doing here?’ Bron asked as they walked into the kitchen of the McClune packhouse. ‘I didn’t know you were coming up.’ She grabbed Shelley and then Eloise in a big hug.

  ‘Nobody does. We didn’t tell anyone we were coming,’ Iain said.

  ‘It just kind of happened,’ Patrick agreed.

  River walked in the door behind Bron, a towel in his hand, hair wet. ‘Hey, what’s going on here? Did someone organise a party without telling me?’

  Shelley looked around. ‘We’re here to see Adeline and some of the other spirits.’

  ‘You want to speak to them?’

  ‘Yes. Adam needs me to communicate with them for him. He’s been unable to talk with them so far, so I’ve come up with him to act as an interpreter.’

  ‘What do you mean Adam needs you to communicate with them? He’s unconscious. He can’t communicate with anyone.’

  ‘Shelley can see Adam,’ Eloise volunteered.

  ‘She says he’s here now,’ Iain said.

  Patrick rubbed his head. ‘He slapped me upside the back of the head.’

  ‘Wait a minute.’ Bron held up her hands. ‘But … he’s not dead.’

  ‘Here we go again,’ Adam said, rolling his eyes, making Shelley feel like chuckling. ‘Tell them I’m a not-shade spirit-thingy.’

  ‘I’m not calling you that.’

  ‘What? What did he say? What’s going on?’

  Shelley sighed. ‘I’m not explaining anything until Jason and Skye are here.’

  River closed his eyes for a moment and when he opened them said, ‘They’re on their way.’

  Jason and Skye walked in a few minutes later, hands clasped. ‘Shelley!’ Skye said, racing to her friend and enveloping her in a hug. ‘And Eloise!’ Another hug for their new coven member. ‘It’s so lovely to see you in the flesh.’

  ‘What’s all this about?’ Jason asked after doing the male-nod thing with Iain and Patrick.

  ‘It’s for Shelley to tell you,’ Iain said, pointing at her.

  She took a deep breath. Now the moment was here, she wasn’t sure what to say, so she just blurted out, ‘Adam is here. I’ve been able to see him since Ostara. But he’s not dead,’ she said quickly as Jason’s face blanched. ‘Something else has happened.’

  Jason’s gaze chased around the room. ‘A?’ He took a step forward. ‘You’re here?’

  ‘I am.’

  Shelley translated.

  ‘Why didn’t you tell me? Why is this the first I’m hearing about it?’

  ‘Don’t yell at Shelley,’ Adam snarled, standing in front of her. ‘It was my decision. Tell him it was my decision.’

  Shelley did no such thing. ‘I believed that if I could see him, he was dead, so I didn’t want to admit he was real. I thought I was having a bad hallucination.’

  ‘I’d call me a good hallucination.’

  She screwed her nose up at him. ‘But then he was too annoying to be a hallucination, so I realised he was actually there.’

  ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’

  ‘Because I didn’t know what he was or why I could see him. Neither of us wanted to say anything given we had no answers. We didn’t want to worry you further until we knew more. I’ve been researching in the diaries, trying to look for specific references.’

  ‘Have you found anything?’

  ‘No.’ She looked down. ‘Not specifically about what he is. All we know is that he’s not anything like the spirits I see and he’s not a Shade. I don’t know why I can see him, but there is something different about him. Something special.’ Shelley’s throat felt thick, and she coughed, trying to cover it.

  ‘He is special. I’ve always known it.’

  ‘Of course you have,’ Adam said. ‘It practically shines off me.’

  Shelley rolled her eyes again. ‘That’s just what you need, a bigger head.’

  ‘What did he say?’ Jason asked. She told him. He barked out a laugh, as did the others. ‘That sounds like Adam.’

  ‘My job here is done.’ Adam folded his arms and leaned against the table behind him.

  Shelley stared around her. It was like something had lifted and been replaced with … light? Laughter? Hope? All the things that Adam had always brought to the pack. Even in his altered state, he was still doing as he’d always done. Her gaze fell to Adam. He had faded a little. ‘Stop it, Adam. Stop doing that.’

  ‘Stop what?’ He looked surprised at her vehemence.

  ‘What’s he doing?’

  ‘He’s giving you part of himself, just like he did the night of Ostara when he helped Iain to keep Eloise with us.’

  ‘That was Adam?’ Iain asked.

  Shelley waved her hand at him, as if wiping away his question. ‘It’s not the only time he’s done it either.’

  ‘I’m fine, Kitten.’

  ‘No. You’re not. Look at you.’

  He looked down, his brow furrowing. ‘So, I’m a little paler than before.’

  ‘A little? You’re fading. You’re giving your life essence to everyone else in this room to make them feel better.’

  ‘It’s what he’s always done,’ Skye said.

  ‘We’ve known something like that was happening for a while now,’ Bron added.

  ‘But that doesn’t make it right.’ She shook her head, mouth working, trying to find the words to
convince him—convince all of them—that he couldn’t do it anymore. ‘He will give you all he has if you ask for it. But he’ll unravel. He’ll use up everything he is and become nothing. You can’t ask him to do anything like that again. You can’t.’

  Bron’s eyes had grown wide, her face pale. ‘I wouldn’t let him do that, Shelley.’

  ‘I know,’ Shelley said, fingers twining, shoulders tensed. ‘But it doesn’t matter if you’d “let him” or not. Don’t you understand Adam at all?’

  ‘It’s okay, Kitten.’ Adam began to massage her shoulders.

  She wanted to lean back, let him soothe her, let his hands run over her shoulders, down her arms, touching more than her tense muscles, but she couldn’t. Wouldn’t. She jerked away and spun to face him. ‘It’s not okay, Adam, you idiot!’ She flung her hand out, pointing at the others. ‘You don’t understand. None of you do.’

  ‘Then tell us,’ Iain said.

  ‘What have you found out?’ Bron asked.

  She was breathing heavily, skin tingling, words from the diaries coalescing in her mind, certain phrases jumping out at her, brighter now, more pertinent as she realised how true they were. Adam made himself look the laughing fool, never taking anything seriously, when all he ever did was take everything seriously. When all he’d ever done was give and give and give. Laughter and happiness wasn’t simply a passing fad for him, an expression of the moment; it was something woven into the very fabric of his nature, who he was, what he must do, who he must be.

  ‘Shelley. Kitten.’ A hand grabbed hers—Adam. Held tight when she tried to pull away. ‘It’s okay. You don’t have to protect me.’

  Her gaze snapped to his. ‘Of course I do. You need protecting more than anyone else.’

  ‘No. I don’t.’

  ‘Yes, you do. Because you give too much. You give everything until there’s nothing left anymore. I can’t let that happen. I can’t let them do it to you.’

  ‘Nobody here would hurt me.’

  ‘That’s only because they don’t know what giving too much means. What they take when they let you do that.’

  His hands slid up her arms, captured her face, held her still, looking into his eyes. ‘You’re not seeing it right, Kitten.’

  ‘I’m seeing it the way it is. You give too much, Adam. You always do. In fact, you’re doing it now.’ She tore away from him, horrified to see that he’d paled even more as he touched her, as he soothed her. ‘My god! Look at you. You’re definitely not a Shade. You don’t take life. You give it.’

  ‘Kitten.’ He reached for her, but she skittered back. ‘I’m fine. I feel fine. You’re overreacting.’

  ‘And I have a right to overreact!’ she shouted. ‘I see dead people. I talk to them. Hear them. I predict and scream out oncoming death. Everything about me is about death. About the absence of life. About taking. Taking. Taking.’

  She was sobbing now, her breath coming in hard, sharp gasps. Her skin was buzzing, purple lightning sparking from her fingers. She looked down at it, horrified, seeing the reality of her power for the first time, changed since she’d become the banshee. Purple lightning. Not the brilliant blue of Skye’s or the warm golden orange of Bron’s or the sparking life-fuelled green of Eloise’s. Hers was darker. Amethyst with a dark heart of deeper purple at the centre—almost black. Black like Warlock’s Lightning.

  Fuck.

  ‘Get back,’ she said, stepping away from all of them. ‘Get back.’

  ‘Shelley. What’s wrong!’

  ‘I’m dangerous. Can’t you see? It’s me. I’m death. I’m death! Get them out of here,’ she screamed at the Were in the room, gesturing with sparking fingers, purple lightning leaping from her fingertips to burst against the walls, the floors.

  ‘Her power’s built up,’ Bron cried.

  ‘Jason, help her,’ Skye shouted. She tried to step forward, Eloise at her side, but Shelley screamed at them to keep back, her power snapping at them, carving a line of purple light between them and her.

  ‘Shelley. No. Let us help you.’

  ‘Stay back! Stay back! Someone’s going to die if you don’t. That’s who I am.’

  ‘It’s not.’

  Iain, River, Jason and Patrick had stepped in front of Skye, Bron and Eloise, who were still trying to get to Shelley through the purple wall of light, so she realised in some part of her mind that it wasn’t any of them she heard standing so close beside her.

  ‘You’re not death. You are life.’

  And before she could stop him, Adam stepped into her line of vision, grabbed her face and kissed her.

  Chapter 12

  Adam pressed his lips against hers. Shelley stiffened, jerked. He held tighter to her face, knowing deep inside him that this was what he had to do.

  There was a buzz of power over his hands, centring on his lips where they met Shelley’s. Purplish light was all around and something was whipping at his hair. There was no sound though. The howling that he’d gotten used to since being there had disappeared, and all he could hear was the beat of his heart and the fast-paced beat of Shelley’s—too fast.

  ‘Adam? I can see him.’

  Vaguely he heard Jason’s voice behind him, but he didn’t pull away from Shelley. Couldn’t.

  ‘Holy fuck. I can see him too.’ Iain.

  ‘Like a shadow.’ River.

  ‘He’s getting brighter though.’ Eloise, wonder in her voice.

  ‘He’s channelling her power.’ Skye.

  ‘By kissing her?’ Patrick.

  ‘Sometimes, that’s what it takes to share the power.’ Bron.

  He had no idea what they were looking at, and quite frankly, he didn’t care. Shelley’s lips were warm under his. Bliss. He began to nibble her plump lower lip, sucking it into his mouth. He forgot all about their audience.

  Warm breath cascaded over his skin as she sighed and softened against him. The softening was only a little, but it was enough. Her mouth opened slightly, her tongue darting out to taste his lips. He opened and let her inside, let her control the kiss.

  Shots of electricity prickled over his hands, moving out. They were warmth and life and sexual caress all rolled into one. Her power. It wrapped around him and pulled them closer, chest to breast, hip to hip, and held them there. He wanted to be this close to her just as much as it seemed her power needed him to be there.

  It was right. It was good. Better than good. Perfect.

  Her tongue slid along his as her mouth widened. He groaned a little. An answering sound came from her, buzzing through her chest into him, making him smile.

  Her lips moved, slanting at an angle, and her hands came up to grip his shoulders, one sliding up to the back of his neck, into his hair, the other chasing across his back, fingers clenching, desperate. He understood her need. He let one of his hands slide down to her waist, pulled her even closer, and deepened the kiss.

  The air sizzled with her power, the purple brightening, light-shot amethyst with a golden edge, spilling around him, into him.

  ‘That’s right,’ he whispered against her mouth. ‘Syphon the excess into me.’

  Shelley pulled away a little, her gaze meeting his, the once bright blue now a brilliant violet. ‘Adam, no. I’ll hurt you.’

  His hands gentled their hold, letting her know it was her choice to stay as he shook his head. It didn’t matter if his wolf wasn’t in his body. He knew with sudden certainty that was not the way this worked. It wasn’t his wolf that took the power and used it, it was their spirit. The heart of them. It just used it to enact something essential to them, something magical that needed a little help when they couldn’t borrow the power of the moon. ‘The Trickster in me says you won’t. It knows we need this. Both of us. Do you trust me?’

  Fear flickered through her eyes as they widened. He knew he was asking a lot. Wasn’t sure she was ready yet to take that step into trusting the pack. Trusting him. She really hadn’t trusted any of them yet. She was here because of Skye and Bron and their
trust. It wasn’t that she didn’t like the pack. She did. Even admired them. But trust? For Shelley, that was the biggest ask. He knew that deep in his soul. It was one of the reasons he’d always been so full of jokes and harmless flirting. He’d always sensed how much she needed things to stay light. To be able to brush away casual affection. To not let it anywhere near her heart. She’d been hurt deeply in the past, and not just by her bastard of an ex-fiancé. The pain ran further back than that. It was a fissure he wasn’t sure would ever mend.

  But right now, he didn’t need to mend that fissure. He just needed her to trust in his Trickster instincts. After all the research she’d done, the things she’d said to him about his own worth to the pack, he hoped she would meet him halfway with this at least.

  Finally, the need to breathe a scream in his chest, she nodded.

  His released breath fluttered her hair, the ends alive with the purple brightness of her power. ‘Give it to me.’

  She laughed—a brief snort—and then pulled him close again, lips meeting his in a long, searching, searing kiss.

  The power surged around him. Into him. The kiss heated him, the power adding to the surge of desire cascading through him, firing him. He tried to hold on to it, tried to stay in control, to keep from taking over, but it built and built and built as Shelley slid her tongue into his mouth, twining it with his, sucked his lip, bit his chin, her hands tracing fire across his back, along his arms and shoulders, into his hair, down to his butt.

  He pulled her tight against him with a groan and gave in to the desire roaring inside him to take, to hold, to have.

  He half expected her to fight him, but she didn’t. She leaned into him, giving him more, sharing control of the kiss and the fire and the power. The perfect beauty of what she gave surged through him, and with a roar he lifted his head to the ceiling and howled, the sound a note of triumph and satisfaction all rolled into one.

  He looked down at Shelley. She met his gaze, her eyes now velvety-violet-blue, her hair no longer purple-tinged flame. Her lips were kiss-stung and her breath was coming in short, sharp pants. ‘Thank you.’

  ‘Believe me, it was my pleasure.’

  She didn’t let go of him as he half expected. Her arms stayed slung around his shoulders, fingers playing lightly along his collarbone and into the hair on his nape. ‘I didn’t realise the power had built up inside me like that.’