Wrapped in Hope: A Forbidden Romance (The Hope Series Book 1)

by K. B. Andrews

  I took her friendship.

  I took her love.

  I took her body.

  I won’t take her family. I can’t. I’d never be able to live with myself.

  Knowing that this is the last time, I don’t want it to end. It will take a fucking miracle to get me out of her tonight. I pump into her hard as I bite her shoulder, leaving marks behind. She yells and digs her nails into my back before asking for more.

  My innocent little angel is covered in my ashes now. Her wings are no longer white, but a dirty gray. I’ve taken something perfect and tarnished it. No matter what I tell myself, she’ll never be the same. I’ve taken too much of her, and I hate myself for it.

  I feel her release building by the way she tightens around me and I’m ready to fall too. But I’m nowhere near done. If this is the last time, I want to watch her perfect tits bounce while she rides me to sheer exhaustion.

  She shatters around me and I watch in awe. I could be with her for a lifetime and never get tired of watching this. As soon as I feel her go limp around me, I roll us over. “Ride me, angel.”

  She bites her bottom lip as she places her hands against my chest and begins moving up and down my dick. Her head dips back as her eyes close, her dark hair cascading wildly around her, and I watch every breathtaking minute of it, touching every spot on her body. My hands massage her perky tits, glide down her flat stomach, squeeze her curvy hips, and smack her round ass. It’s when my hand falls down to rub circles around her clit that she comes undone.

  I want to kiss every inch of her. I want to be inside her, making her come as long as fucking possible, but I don’t know how much longer I can hold on. I’m ripping at the seams already. But I need to own every part of her.

  I lift her hips, and position her on her hands and knees as I take my place behind her. There’s one place that hasn’t been claimed yet, and I’m taking it. What’s one more piece after I’ve taken so much?

  I rub my hands softly over the curve of her ass, spreading her cheeks for me. “I want you to relax, Hope,” I say, taking my wet dick in my hand and placing it between her cheeks.

  When she picks up on what I’m trying to do, I feel her tense up.

  “Do you trust me?” I press against her.

  “Mm-hmm.” She wiggles her ass in front me. I know I shouldn’t, but when she does that, I’m a fucking goner.

  “That’s my girl,” I damn near growl as I push inside her tight ass. She tenses and takes a sudden breath. I don’t move to allow her to adjust. Instead, I place kisses along her shoulder blades and softly caress her naked sides and breasts.

  I feel her relax around me before I push deeper. My right hand travels around to her awaiting pussy. The second my fingers graze her swollen clit, she lets out a moan that shoots pleasure straight to my dick that’s ready to explode.

  The view before me is nothing short of euphoric. I have my angel doing all sorts of dirty things. Things she would only do for me. She’s mine completely now. There’s no part of her I’ve left untouched.

  As my release builds higher, hers is set free. Her breathing is heavy as pleas and gasps leave her lips. She’s rocking back against me, needing more as she rides out the waves of her orgasm. I can’t hold back any longer. It builds as high as it can go before it shatters and takes me over the edge completely.

  With her body completely spent from her recent orgasms, I roll her over and pull her against my chest. I could fall asleep right now, but I fight the urge, knowing what I have to do next will kill me. It will take a piece of my soul. I may have turned her pure white form to a dull gray, but a little of her light will always brighten my heart. It will be the only clean part of me.

  I feel her heat, her heart, and her love as I watch her drift off into the dream world, wishing we could escape there forever so we could get our happily ever after. But this is the real world, and not everything ends happy. Some things, some people, are just fucked from the beginning, me being one of them.

  I reached out and stole her like that forbidden apple in the garden she belongs in, it’s only fair she keeps a part of me. A part I hope I can live without: my heart, my soul.

  All I can do now is hope she forgives me for what I’m about to do, that she understands that this is me being selfless. I hope she gets everything out of life she dreams of. And I hope that I survive living without her. I’m wrapped in hope but won’t be able to reach out and touch her ever again.

  Chapter 25

  I start to wake up, but I don’t open my eyes. I’m on cloud nine. Last night was amazing. It was like he physically couldn’t stop making love to me. He fucked me into pure exhaustion. The last thing I remember is him pulling me against his strong chest.

  I can smell the fire that’s no longer burning. I can feel every place Holden touched my skin. It burns with the memories of last night, but despite the warmth I feel, a chill runs through me. I crack open my eyes and roll to my back, expecting to see him. The floor beside me is bare.

  I stand wrapping the sheet around me as I walk to his bedroom and bathroom, but the whole place is empty. Thinking that maybe he just went to grab us some coffee, I head back to the living room to find my clothes, and that’s when I see a piece of paper setting on the couch cushion.

  My heart feels like it stops beating as I stand completely still, staring at it. When I work up enough courage, I push forward with my heart pounding away like a jackhammer.

  I fall onto the couch and pick up the note. It reads:

  Hope,

  I’m sorry for the way I’m doing this, but I knew that if I stuck around long enough to tell you to your face, it would be way too easy for you to talk me out of it. Please understand that I did this for you. I knew our time was limited, that everything would blow up in our face. I love you with everything I am, but I have to go. I’ve taken so much from you already. I won’t take the only family you have as well. I know one of these days you’ll understand.

  Please lock up when you leave. I’m arranging for one of the guys at the shop to take care of the place. Don’t look for me, Hope. I don’t even know where I’m going. Forget about me and move on.

  I’ll love you always

  My eyes begin tearing before I’ve even finished reading the letter. But now, they’re falling freely, rushing from my eyes. Why would he do this? Why doesn’t he see how much I love him? This isn’t something I can just get over. I need him.

  But he’s gone.

  I hug the letter to my chest. The tears flow from my eyes on their own. There’s no controlling them or the hate that’s consuming me.

  The hate pumping through my veins gives me power, and I gain strength from it. I use it to propel me to my feet where I grab my clothes off the floor and pull them on.

  This last month, I’ve been strong. I dealt with the feelings that came along from the loss of Dean — I had been putting it off for far too long. I’ve made extensive changes to my life to be happy again. I won’t let him take that from me. If he’s done with me, I’m done with him. I won’t waste anymore of my life grieving.

  I hold my chin high as I walk out of his apartment for the last time.

  It’s been one week and I haven’t heard from Holden. I can feel the depression pulling at me, but I refuse to give in. Tonight is my graduation and it makes me think of him more. Questions upon questions fill my head. Why did he do this? Does he really think I’m better off without him? Will he make a grand appearance tonight? I don’t hold my breath.

  I told my parents that Holden and I are over, and they’ve reached out several times over the past week, but something is different between us. They always told me that they would support whatever I wanted to do, but the first time I actually needed their support, they abandoned me and looked at me like I was dirtied up and used. I get why they may not have liked the idea of us being together, but they can’t see how much I love him. They don’t see the way he looks at me. They should have seen all the progress I had made since being with him
. Instead, they only saw the forbidden side.

  With school being done, I have no idea what I’m going to do. I don’t feel like our relationship is strong enough to move back home, but I can’t afford to keep staying in this apartment on what I make at the coffee shop, and I’m sure my parents won’t send me money the rest of my life either. It’s like I’m looking down the barrel of a gun and I’m frozen in fear. My future is wide open, and I’ve never been more afraid.

  I pull on a cap and gown for the second time in my life and can’t help but think of the last time I wore a getup like this. Thinking of that day fills me with joy, but also sadness. Dean should be here.

  Memories from that day flash before my eyes: his big smile when he walked out of his house in his cap and gown and saw me waiting by his truck, the way he nodded me on, silently giving me the strength I needed to start my speech, and the look he gave me in the truck when our worried parents were afraid of letting us go. Every little look, touch, and feeling shared between us all seem to touch me at once, and suddenly, I’m filled with love and happiness. I feel stronger, like he’s here with me now, giving me his strength once again.

  I wrap my arms around myself and breathe deeply. “Thank you, Dean. Thank you for staying with me and giving me everything I need to move on,” I whisper into the nothingness.

  I push my hair away from my face and stand, ready to start this new future that’s going to pull me in whether I’m ready or not.

  The graduation goes smoothly. It was entirely way too long, there were speeches, tears, prayers, and then it ended with everyone throwing up their caps. I went through the whole thing pretending to be happier than I actually felt.

  I give hugs to the new friends I had made and even promised to stop by a party before calling it a night. I meet my awaiting parents on the lawn in front of the school to take the traditional post-graduation picture. They take turns with the phone, taking pictures of us together, and then hand it off to someone nearby to take a picture of all of us.

  Even though I’m trying to be happy about graduation, everything feels strained. The tension between my parents and myself is still there, only they pretend better than I do.

  “Where do you want to go for dinner?” my mom asks me with Dad at her side.

  I take off my cap and gown, folding the gown over my arm as I cross them over my chest. “I think I’m just going to call it a night. I’m tired,” I lie.

  “Oh, come on, pumpkin. A little dinner won’t hurt you.” He reaches for my arm but I pull away.

  “No. I don’t want dinner.”

  “What’s gotten into you, Hope?” my mom asks.

  My mouth hangs open. “What do you think? You think you can say all the things you said to me last week and expect everything to be fine? You’re my parents, you should support my decisions. Instead, you judged me for my relationship with Holden and he left me. I love him and now he’s gone because you two can’t keep your opinions to yourself.”

  My dad takes a deep breath. “So this is how it’s going to be from now on? I can’t voice my opinion without the chance of you pulling away from us?”

  I hold firm. It’s my life. It’s my choice how to live it. “No, Dad. You’re more than welcome to voice your opinion. What you’re not allowed to do is forbid me from anything. I’m not a child. I should get to choose how I live my life. Until you can learn to accept that, I’m afraid this is how our relationship will be.”

  He looks me up and down disapprovingly. “Let’s go, Lisa,” he says, walking away.

  My mother is frozen in place, looking between me and my father. She takes a deep breath. “Don’t forget to call and let us know you’re safe.” She closes the distance between us, presses a kiss to my forehead, and chases after my dad.

  I stand alone, like always.

  I start walking mindlessly when Brittney, a new friend I made, comes running up to me. “Hope, do you want to ride to the party with us?”

  I look at her bright red hair that is piled up on her head, her fair skin, and friendly blue eyes, and smile. “Sure.”

  She holds out her hand, that I take, and leads me over to a group of people. They are all excited and chattering endlessly, but I stay quiet, still not feeling the excitement and energy of the day.

  It’s growing crowded outside due to everyone filing out of the auditorium. I look for him in the sea of faces, hoping that maybe he came just to keep his word. I search and I search, looking over every face, and suddenly, I see him. He’s standing at least twenty feet from me. His dark hair is styled neatly and his mouth is drawn into a straight line. I can only see his face due to the many people walking between us, but it’s him. I know it is. I can feel it like his body is calling to mine.

  Someone bumps into my shoulder, pushing me forward and I lose sight of him. When I bring my eyes back up, he’s gone. I walk away from the group of people I’m standing with, walking toward where I saw him. I look over everyone, hoping to find him. But he’s gone. I feel my heart break even more.

  I’m at the party with a drink in my hand. I’ve had several already and for the first time in a week, I care about nothing. Holden said he kept stealing from me, but all the alcohol I’ve consumed has stolen what’s left.

  The pain.

  It’s completely gone now.

  In a way, I feel lighter, more carefree. But on the other hand, I feel like I’m missing something, a piece that belongs in my chest. I’ve carried around pain in one form or another for five years, and now it’s gone. It leaves a gaping hole inside of me. I’m not sure which is worse, pain and sadness or emptiness.

  “Hi, beautiful,” a guy my age with golden-blond hair says as he comes to stand beside me.

  “Hi,” I reply. The few drinks I’ve had is enough to keep me from correcting him like I normally would.

  “Are you here alone?” His eyes flash around us, looking for a boyfriend who may come back to claim me.

  I laugh. “Yep.” I’m always alone.

  He offers up his panty-dropping smile. “Want some company?” I see him take me in from my feet to my eyes.

  I do the same, mulling over the question. Do I want company or do I want to be left alone? I’m tired of being alone. “Sure.” I force a smile.

  He places his arm around my neck. “I’m Brad.”

  “Hope.”

  “That’s a pretty name. I admit, I need a little more Hope in my life.”

  I laugh out loud. “Like I haven’t heard that one before.”

  “It was worth a shot.” He shrugs. “Do you want to grab a fresh drink and maybe go outside and talk? Get to know one another?”

  I look around at the large party. People are dancing on every surface, couples make out in the corners, and all the frat guys are busy drinking and yelling. It’s loud with the blaring music and so many people shoved into one frat house. “Why not?”

  He leads me outside and we take a seat at a picnic table. The party is raging on out here too, but it’s much quieter. There is a bonfire going on across the yard, and the people standing around it seem content with quiet conversation and drinking their beer.

  “So, where do you plan on going from here, Hope?” Brad asks me.

  I snap my attention back to him. “I have no idea. You?”

  He laughs. “No, idea. I’m thinking about making a move to New York though.”

  My brows raise. “New York, huh? What’s there?”

  He gives me a cute boyish smile. “I don’t know. I just want to get away. I just went through a bad break up.”

  I take a sip of my foamy beer. “Me too.”

  Excitement covers his face. “Looks like this may be our destiny.”

  I almost choke. “I hate that bitch.”

  He laughs, the sound seems unfamiliar to me, like I’ve forgotten what it feels like. “How about Fate then?”

  I shake my head while biting the edge of my plastic cup. “Nope, we’re not on good terms either.”

  He leans back, raising
his beer to take a drink. “You’ll see. This is the beginning.”

  Chapter 26

  Three years later…

  Brad calls just as I’m walking out of the grocery store. The New York wind blows, swirling my hair around me as I answer the phone. “I’m on my way.”

  “Is it too late to have you grab some of that fancy cheese for the party?”

  I turn and look at the store I just escaped from, and all for a pack of gum. “Yes. We have enough.”

  He takes a loud breath. “If you think so. Hurry before you’re late.”

  I laugh. “We have four hours. Stop stressing. Be there soon.”

  “Love you,” he practically sings into the phone.

  I laugh at his playfulness. “I love you too. Bye.” I hang up the phone and slide it into my purse while turning back around to leave. I bump hard into someone’s chest.

  “Oh, God. I’m so sorr…” the words stop as I look up.

  It’s Holden.

  “Hi, Hope.” His voice is deep and raspy and even sexier than I remember it.

  “Holden? What are you doing here?” I look him up and down, not believing my eyes. I never thought I’d see him again. He’s tall and lean, and has a beard that I want to run my fingers through. He has more muscle than ever. I can tell he’s been hitting the gym extra hard these last three years. His black t-shirt pulls tightly across his broad chest, leading down to his firm, narrow stomach. He looks sexy as fuck. I’m breathless just from looking at him, remembering those rough, callused hands on my body, remembering those sexy lips on mine. I have to squeeze my thighs together to keep away the flood of wanting that washes over me.

  “I moved here about a year ago. What are you doing here?”