by Frankie Love
“You’re my opposite in so many ways, Ford.”
“The yin and the yang.” I press my mouth to her thighs, her cunt, I want to memorize how she smells, how soft she is, how full of want her innocent little body is, and how badly she wants me to take her to all the places she dreams of going.
She laughs. “A philosopher too? Wow, you’re a real renaissance man, Ford Thatcher.”
I lean over her, her fingers unzipping my fly, reaching inside my jeans to touch my rigid cock. I groan as her fingers run up and down my thickness, and I fucking feel the need rising inside of me.
“No,” I manage to say, my rigid cock demanding all the damn attention. “I’m just a simple man, living in the woods.”
“But you’re in Manhattan, now you’re a big city man.” She pushes my jeans down further, giving herself more room to work with. And when my cock springs free, her hands run over the length of it greedily. She presses her mouth against mine, her tongue swirling against my own, all the while our hands working overtime as I finger her tight pussy and as she handles my cock with the devotion I crave.
Damn, she is a breath of fresh air. A fucking dream.
“No way,” I say, trying to focus on the conversation, but struggling not to lose myself in her. “You can put a mountain man in the city but that won’t change him.”
“No?” she asks as I push her dress up higher, past her hips, ripping off her panties, and her pussy is all for me. I love how swollen her cunt is, so damn ready, and I look over her sweet little mound as I think about all the ways I want to fuck her perfect body.
“You’re a tease, Ford Thatcher,” she moans, as I pump my cock, looking her bare cunt over.
“Touch yourself,” I tell her, and she obeys. She spreads her thighs and runs her polished finger over her dripping pussy. Her eyes close as she moves a finger in a nice little circle, then she offers that finger to me. I suck it, loving the way this woman tastes; it’s sweet and spicy and fucking heaven sent. I can’t take it anymore.
“I need you, Mia, now,” I growl. I press my cock between her spread legs, my tip teasing her until she’s moaning for more. “I’m fucking you outside, in the green grass, the moon overhead, stars fighting to be seen. I’m taking you in the great outdoors, Mia. Does that seem like something the men in this city do?”
“No,” she whimpers, her titties bouncing just like I dreamed about. They are big and round and so fucking primed to be squeezed by a real man’s hands. “This is wild,” she moans. “And unexpected. And really. Fucking. Hot.”
She’s telling me. This is the hottest fuck of my life, she and I here, together. Our bodies slick with sweat and pleasure pumping through our veins. I press my cock deep inside her tight pussy, loving the way she feels against me. Warm and wanting. Her back arches in pleasure as I fill her up nice and good.
“Good.” I thrust deep inside her, cradling her face in one palm. “Because I like it wild and I like it hot.”
“Show me how wild you like it, Ford,” she begs, unbuttoning my shirt, running her hands over my ladder of abs.
I roll her on top of me, unzipping the back of her dress as she moves her hips in a circle. Pulling her dress over her head, I take those perfect tits of hers in my hands, pulling them into my mouth, sucking her tight nipples and fucking her hard. She claws at my chest, moaning as we inch closer to the edge.
“Oh, Ford,” she moans, her hair falling out of the high bun on her head, tendrils of dark hair spilling over her shoulders. She looks so fucking hot riding me like this. The moon behind her, lights her like a motherfucking halo.
“You’re so beautiful,” I tell her, seeing it all so damn perfectly.
“Shush,” she says, pressing her hand to my mouth, but the words have already been spoken, they can’t be contained. Mia is light and inspiration. She’s a fucking survivor, but she isn’t broken.
She is still growing, in her own way, even if she can’t see it yet.
We fuck, fingers laced as we come together. Wild and fucking free.
I look up at her, mesmerized.
This is the very spot where I will build my sculpture and I’m no longer stuck.
I’m fucking moved. Moved by her.
Mia is more than a guardian. More than a hotel clerk. Or a woman who can make a grown man fall to his knees.
She is more than all that.
Mia is my muse.
14
Mia
I don’t need a man.
At least, it’s what I’ve always told myself.
But over the last two weeks, Ford has led me to question my ideas about everything. It’s unnerving and electric and terrifying.
The idea of needing a man in my life is something I have always resisted. Sure, there was that one guy I dated briefly in college, but that was because I wanted to get a lot of firsts out of the way. But having a man has never, ever been a priority.
My mom never needed one.
She always said the only thing a man did for her was break her heart and give her children. She was grateful to have us. We were her stars and she was our moon and that was enough. After our dad left, we never felt like we lost our sun.
Mom was bright enough on her own.
The thing she said about a man breaking her heart stayed with me, though. I didn’t want that experience to shape me. Not then. Not now. Not ever. I believed I could protect myself from that, by keeping men at arm’s length. It’s hard enough for me to make my own life work now. Adding a man into the mix seems overwhelming to navigate.
And for what?
So, I can be like my mother? A single mom in an expensive city, always waiting for the other shoe to drop?
Dad was a cheat and a liar. I remember Mr. Roller said my father never worked an honest day in his life.
Not exactly a role model, and he was the one and only nail in the I-need-a-man-to-make-me-happy coffin. Those fairy tales of a princess falling for her prince can stay in children’s books. I never had a place for those stories on my shelf.
Why work hard to have a man take it all away? Mom pinched pennies and saved to make our life in the city work. And then dad would come home, take her money, and go to a bar.
I was not going to let a man drink my dreams away.
And I have never been alone in those sentiments. Tallie may still be a teenager, but she remembers dad. The way his temper would make our strong mother weak. The way his anger would roll into the apartment and knock over everything in its wake.
Tallie’s never dated anyone seriously either.
Maybe we have daddy issues, but we tend to think our mother learned the hard lesson for us. We can go out with whoever we want, but there’s no reason to get our feelings involved.
Which is why the conversation I need to have with her is complicated.
“You’re sure quiet,” Tallie says, finding me in the kitchen adding fruit to the blender.
“It’s early.”
She looks at the clock. “It’s eleven. That’s not early for you.”
I turn on the blender, filled with frozen bananas and almond milk and try to figure out how to explain Ford.
Ford, who makes me feel wobbly in the knees—and that is without heels on. Next to him, if I’m standing in my bare feet, I feel off balance. And not in a bad way. In an I-hope-he-catches-me way.
Like, I want him to brace my fall.
I swallow, the blender filling our apartment with sound as it whirls, matching the buzzing in my heart.
I’ve known him three weeks and somehow, he has cracked my ideas of what a man is in two. In my down time, I keep looking for jobs and rentals, but when I’m not doing that, I’m with Ford.
“You’ve been acting weird for a few weeks now, what gives?” she asks.
“Don’t you have somewhere to be?”
She shakes her head. “Nope. School’s out, remember?”
I remember. The last few weeks were filled with end of year “fun”. Matty’s overnight class trip to Isla
nd-Bridge. During which Ford took me to the top of Empire State Building and pointed out the hint of constellations. Even with us being so high off the ground, it was still hard to see through the lights of the city.
“See that? Can you make out that zig-zag?” he said, his hand on the small of my back, pointing to the line of bright stars. “That’s Cassiopeia.”
“You just know these things?” I asked, amazed at the way has memorized the sky.
“I told you I spend a lot of time sitting on my porch looking up.”
Looking up. Just like my mom always told us to do.
Then Tallie had her Junior Showcase, where the students’ yearly portfolios were on display. I was so proud of her, but what really sticks out is what I did afterward. Ford told me to meet him outside the hotel and once I arrived, he pulled me into a taxi and told the driver an address I didn’t recognize.
When we arrived, we took the stairs of the Lower East Side Toy Company and wound through a back alley.
“Where are you taking me?” I asked in a whisper.
“Be patient, butterfly.”
Butterfly.
We took a flight of stairs and found the back entrance, where a doorman considered us. Finally, he smiled and then he opened a door to an old-school speakeasy. My heart fluttered at the unexpected romance. At the absolute thoughtfulness.
Who is this mountain man, navigating Manhattan better than me?
Cocktails were served in teacups and bottles of beer were wrapped in paper bags. Ford ordered for us at the gleaming wood bar while I found us a velveteen sofa tucked in a corner. I had never heard of the place, and the fact Ford had found it and brought me here was delightful. My heart cooed with pleasure as I looked around the secret place.
The other patrons were dressed in slick black suits and dresses, looking New York City cool, but there was Ford at the bar, with his thick beard and flannel shirt, looking like a woodsman, but somehow not at all out of place. Ford fit in because he didn’t need approval.
“Champagne?” I asked, surprised when he brought back two flutes of bubbly. He was a whiskey man, through and through.
“To celebrate.”
“What?”
“The end of the school year. I’m so damn proud of you, You got Tahlia and Matty through all of it.” He raised his glass to mine and toasted me. “You did it, Mia. All on your own.”
The words hit my heart in a way I hadn’t expected. Ford didn’t just walk into my life and sweep me off my feet.
He saw me.
“Thank you,” I said, my voice quiet, small.
“Don’t thank me. This is the easy part, getting a gorgeous girl tipsy. You did the heavy lifting, managing two hormonal beasts for the last nine months.”
I kissed him, there in that speakeasy, knowing I needed to pull back before I got myself in real trouble. Before I fell hard.
And now, sitting in the kitchen with Tahlia, pouring us both a fruit smoothie, I’m scared to admit that part of me wants to fall.
Or that I already have.
15
Mia
“So, Tallie, you know Ford, the artist staying here?” I ask, taking a sip of the smoothie.
Tallie nods. “Obviously. He’s the guy who took you to the gala.”
“Right. Well, I’ve kind of been seeing him. A lot.”
Tallie frowns. “When?”
“Well.” I swallow. “Like, you know the night Jaimie and Karis were over and dressed me up and I said I went to the movies and you guys made fun of me for the next week?”
She grins, slapping the counter. “No way. You were with him?”
“Yeah. We visited his sculpture site. And like, remember after the Junior Showcase I said I was going to the bookstore?”
“I thought that was a weird thing to do at eight o’clock at night.”
“He took me out then, too. To this insanely perfect bar.”
Tahlia frowns, walking to the couch, and sitting before crossing her legs, smoothie in hand.
“Are you mad?” I ask, following her.
Before she answers, Mathias comes out of his bedroom right then, asking if one of us will take him to the Bronx Zoo.
“I want to make a video of the bear. I want to make him dance.”
“You can’t make a bear dance,” Tallie says.
Matty groans. “I can try.”
“He’s asked like five times already,” Tallie tells me. “And he won’t stop bugging me about going to see Ford’s sculpture.”
“I know. How about a day off next week?” I suggest. “I’ve gotta do laundry and grocery shop today.”
“What about Tals?” he whines.
“No go. I have my internship in an hour, bud.”
“Fine.” Matty rolls his eyes and returns to his room.
“So, what do you think? About Ford and me?”
Tallie scrunches up her face. “Is he really into you?”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know.” She bites the side of her lip. “He’s just, like, a grown-up.”
I frown, indignant. “I’m a grown-up.”
Tallie sighs with a raised eyebrow. “Yeah, but like, a different kind.”
I look down at my fingernails and pick off the polish, trying to remain calm. “I don’t know what you mean by that.”
“You have chipped nails and are wearing a tank top that says HUG DEALER.”
“And that means Ford wouldn’t be into me?”
Tallie shrugs, taking a sip of her smoothie. “I don’t know.” She waves her hands in the air. “If it’s a fling then what does it matter what I think anyway?”
I swallow, needing to tell my little sister the truth. “It feels like it could be more than a fling.”
Tallie looks at me like I’m crazy. And maybe I am. I’ve dated Ford for a few weeks and we mess around in his hotel room. That is not a relationship. That’s a long-term hook-up.
That is a recipe for heartbreak.
It’s also the first time I’ve ever felt so damn alive.
“It’s not just about the fact that he’s older and more… put together than you,” Tallie says, looking at me tenderly, “but Mia, he lives in Colorado. He’s leaving after this job. I just wonder why you’d put yourself through all of that.”
I’ve been wondering the same thing for days, and yet I keep going back to him; to the fact when he is with me, I feel like a load is off my shoulders. Like I can breathe.
“We’re having fun now, though,” I tell her. “It’s making the reality of our situation seem less intense.”
“That’s cool. I mean, I don’t want you to get an ulcer. But we still need to figure stuff out. Like, I don’t want him to be the reason our lives fall apart more than they already have.”
I know she is thinking about Mom and Dad. About the fact, we need a place to live. However, I don’t think it’s fair for her to put all that pressure on me, on Ford.
She has no clue how hard I am looking for a new job. I called a temp agency this week, and even they were over capacity. There is no work anywhere that will pay enough to keep our heads above water. I can work retail or fast food, but not while simultaneously supporting a family of three in the most expensive city in the world.
I look at my sister, who has her head in the clouds and her world’s still safe. She didn’t give her dreams up the day Mom died. Sure, she is grieving the loss just like Matty and me, but she didn’t have to put her world on hold.
So, as much as I love her and am grateful to have her to confide in and lean on, she can’t drive my relationship with Ford. Only I can do that.
“Did you find any leads on apartments?” she asks, changing the topic. “Or a new job?”
She’s clearly done talking about Ford and it makes sense. She doesn’t know him. She thinks he’s a man with one foot out of town, which I guess, he is both of those things.
But he’s more than that. Isn’t he?
“Don’t get me, wrong, Mia,” Tallie s
ays, squeezing my knee. “It’s great for you to get out. I mean, you should go on dates and whatever, but like, I am getting a little worried about the living situation. I might have to take next year into my own hands,” she says teasingly. “Who knows, maybe I’ll flee the country and carve my own path.”
“Yeah right,” I say with a sigh. “You can’t leave me. But I do know what you mean. And I’ve applied for a bunch of positions. I look on Craigslist every day for a place to live.”
I don’t tell her that every place I find has a monthly rent that matches my current monthly paycheck. And no brokers will even call me back when I find a lead. Even if they did, it’s not like I can realistically afford their fees.
She doesn’t need that stress. She has an internship to deal with and she needs it in order to get a scholarship next year at the Design Institute of L.A., her dream school.
“Okay, good,” she laughs. “As long as you don’t get so caught up in this guy, we end up living on the streets.” Her voice is light and I know she’s joking—but her words hit me hard. “But you know, have you thought about going back to school yourself?” she asks.
I scoff. “We can’t afford that.”
She tilts her head and looks at me with disapproval. “We could make anything work.”
Leaning on the couch, I sigh. “It’s not that easy.”
“I know, but there’s night school.”
“Not for hotel management.”
“Well, maybe do something else.”
“Something else?” I roll my eyes. “It’s all I’ve ever considered.”
She rolls her eyes. “Exactly.”
“Thanks for checking in, Tals, but I’m gonna get a job and it’s all gonna be okay, alright? Don’t worry. And you’re the one we need to focus on getting into college, not me.”
The conversation is over, but she gives me a sad look as she walks away. “You don’t always have to play it safe, you know,” she says.
But she doesn’t have a clue the kind of pressure I feel and her words only cement that emotion in my chest.