by Frankie Love
Ford may make my heart beat fast and my body tingle, but I don’t need a distraction if it means ruining things for my brother and sister.
Maybe that’s why Mom never dated after Dad left. She needed to keep her focus if she was going to keep her family together.
Mom sacrificed so much to make us happy, and I won’t let her down.
16
Ford
She’s working, looking at the computer screen and I love the way her mouth pushes forward when she concentrates. It’s sexy as hell, those red lips all primed to be kissed.
“So, I was wondering,” I say, walking up to the front desk, my fingers tapping against the polished wood. “Could I take out your family to dinner?”
Mia looks up from her computer screen with a confused expression. “Like Tahlia and Mathias?”
“And you.”
She bites her bottom lip, her eyes running over her Post-it note calendar. “When were you thinking?”
I laugh. This woman never stops worrying. It’s funny, the way we mesh together, her worry and my disdain for this city, but somehow when we are alone, we’re in sync. “You guys free tonight?”
“You sure you want to take them? Matty has been in a bad mood all week.”
“Moody ten-year-olds don’t scare me.”
“I know but, I’ve never, like, introduced them to someone.”
I knew she wouldn’t be an easy sell. The last few weeks have been fucking amazing. My sculpture is really coming together, thanks to her. The more time we spend together, the more the theme GROWTH expands in my mind.
So far, the sculpture is taking shape in a way I wasn’t expecting. Usually, I am all hard lines and rigid edges. Now, something else is developing.
Something soft. Those flowers and archways I made week one when I was stuck, have found a purpose; a place. And my fingers hum all day long as I weld metal together, creating a thousand vines.
It reminds me of a piece I have at home, at my cabin. A large gazebo with hundreds of metal roses welded to the archways. The practice with that piece makes this one easy, I’m not fumbling for the right heat to use as I work. I understand the way this metal needs to change to become something beautiful.
Still, Mia is keeping me at arm’s length. She’s holding back because she’s holding so much together.
But I want in. Her family is my ticket.
“It’s just dinner,” I say.
“Well, I was hoping to finish up an online application… though maybe I could finish it up on the clock.” She twists her lips, looking up me. “And I suppose we’d have to eat anyways.”
“Wow, you’re really so excited.” I laugh. Despite all the time I’ve spent with Mia, she hasn’t grown attached to me in the way I’ve grown attached to her. For me, I’m all in. But she is cautious and when I learn more about her story, I realize she is not a risk taker. She is a do-what-needs-to-be-done kind of woman, and I wonder what kind of push she would need to go all in with anything.
“This is supposed to be no-strings, is all,” she says, lowering her voice so no one can hear. “Getting my family involved doesn’t feel like no-strings.”
“No one is involved in anything,” I say, not giving up. “Let’s go find some good food and have fun. It doesn’t have to be intense.”
“Right. Fun. Easy breezy.” She lifts her shoulders and exhales dramatically.
“Are you really so opposed to strings?” I ask, leaning in over the counter, so close to her neck that I can smell her perfume. It takes me back to the mountainside where wild roses bloom.
“They’d just tie us down.”
“And you don’t want to be tied to anything, do you, butterfly?” I ask, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.
There may be people in the lobby, but for a moment it’s just her and me, lost in one another’s eyes. She may say she wants to be wild and free, but she’s never lived that way in her life. And right now, she looks nothing but. At this moment, Mia just looks lost.
She catches my hand, squeezing it. “You’re leaving in three weeks, Ford, and I’m all wrong for you.”
I nod, knowing she’s right about when this gig ends, but that’s it.
Mia isn’t wrong for me. She’s everything that’s right.
I’m regretting the decision the moment we walk inside. Guess city kids are used to cooler ways to pass the time. Guess things have changed from when I was a teenager.
“Really? Bowling?” Tahlia looks at her sister as if saying No. Fucking. Way. “I didn’t even know they had these in Manhattan.”
But Mia isn’t having any of it. She rolls her eyes. “Get over yourself, Tallie.”
“Awesome, there’s an arcade too?” Mathias whoops and hollers, which seems to irritate Tallie even more. But internally, I’m glad this kid likes the choice. Matty has a piece of my heart, and I swallow hard, watching his face light up as he looks at the row of pinball machines.
“Let’s get a lane and order some food,” I suggest, taking the lead, knowing the guys are fine, but it’s the ladies I have to worry about.
At the counter, we all hand over our footwear and get bowling shoes. I meet Tahlia’s eyes. “Your sister says you’re into fashion design. Maybe the retro bowling vibe here can inspire you.”
“Right.” She smiles tightly and takes her shoes over to our lane. Okay, so she isn’t interested in small talk.
Matty’s a much easier sell.
“Hey, buddy, wanna pick out the pizza?” He grins and grabs a laminated menu, examining his choices.
Mia smiles, sitting next to me. “So, this is fun,” she says, squeezing my knee. She’s in jeans and a t-shirt. It’s cute, seeing her dressed down. She says her sister always gives her a hard time about her clothes, but I think she looks hot in blue jeans.
“Hey,” she says. “Did you guys know Ford’s parents own a bowling alley?”
“Of course, we didn’t,” Tahlia says. “We just met him.”
Mia isn’t deterred. “Right. Well, they do.”
I clear my throat, wanting to chime in to help things along. “I thought, hey, I might not know the cool places in the city, but this way I can bring a bit of home to you.”
“It’s not true,” Mia says, standing and walking over to the ball rack, testing different weights out. I follow her, looking for a ball of my own.
“You know lots of cool places in the city,” she says. “Every time we’ve gone out you’ve shown me something new.”
“That’s because I’m doing my research. You mentioned not having time for that, so I thought I might help.”
“Smart move,” she says winking and grabbing a purple ball. Lowering her voice, she adds, “And don’t let Tallie throw you off your game tonight. She’s really good at giving attitude until she trusts someone. She’s a city kid, you know?”
“Just like you, right?”
She laughs. “I never gave you attitude, Ford.”
I grip a ball of my own, pointing it at her. “You just gave me a hard ass time.”
She laughs, smirking. “Which you deserved.”
“If I remember correctly, I’m the one who asked you out like a perfect gentleman.”
She leans in close, pinching my ass. “Well let’s hope you don’t act too gentlemanly later tonight.”
17
Ford
Damn, her words get me all spun up. She does crazy things to me, this woman. But I need to step away if I wanna get through this date without getting a fucking hard-on in public.
She laughs, knowing she’s making me the right kind of crazy, and we head back to her siblings who are entering our food order into the touchscreen on our table.
An hour later we’re finishing off a pepperoni pizza while playing the ugliest game of bowling in history. My parents would be slightly worried if they saw how bad we were doing.
“I thought you said you grew up in a bowling alley?” Tahlia asks, pouring herself a glass of root beer from the pitcher on the Formica t
able.
“I did, but it’s been long ass time since I played. I hardly ever go to Thatcher Lanes these days. It’s in town, and I live in the sticks now.”
“Where’s that? The sticks?” Matty asks as Mia takes her ball and haphazardly tosses it down the gutter. Again.
“I live up in the mountains,” I tell him.
He nods, considering this. “All alone?”
I nod. “Yeah. I have my studio up there and usually, I just chill out, relax, and work on a piece.”
“Sounds like paradise,” Mia says, walking back to us. “I can’t even imagine calling work relaxing.”
“Maybe you’re in the wrong line of work,” Tallie says. “You’re always tense and stressed.”
“Not always,” Mia says defensively. But I notice the look Matty and Tahlia share. Clearly, they think otherwise.
“Yeah, but the reason you wanted to do this job wasn’t that you are in love with hotel management. It’s just what you knew, what was easy.”
“Wow, okay. Good to know your thoughts on the matter,” Mia says shaking her head. “And for the record, I love the idea of finding new things and helping guests have a great experience.”
“Let’s not argue, okay?” Mathias says reaching for his ball. “We are supposed to be having fun tonight. For once.”
Now it’s Tallie and Mia’s turns to share a look. Shit, this family is under some serious stress right now. You can sense it in everyone.
Matty throws his ball and he manages to kick down half the pins and then he finishes off with a spare. I clap, stepping away from the sisters. He gives a fist pump and I love seeing the sense of pride on his face.
“Nice work, man.”
“Whatever,” he says, brushing me off. “You’re just being nice.”
“You see my score?” I ask, pointing to the screen above us. “It’s pretty ugly.”
“True,” Matty says laughing. “I’ve never been bowling before. And you’ve been lots, growing up, so I guess I shouldn’t feel so bad.”
I balk, playfully. “You saying I should be embarrassed?”
He shrugs, cracking up. “Your words, not mine.”
Back with the ladies, we see they are embroiled in some heavy discussion regarding Tallie’s plans for next year and Mia’s opinions on the matter. Matty’s face instantly falls, realizing they didn’t see him make the first strike of the night.
We leave the girls and head over to the arcade where we play Street Fighter and some Star Wars game until our fingers hurt. Every time I look over at him, he’s grinning ear to ear.
My chest tightens, watching him, looking so damn happy. Memories of the past float to the surface and I can’t help thinking about the what-ifs in life.
What if I had saved him? What if he was still here? What if I hadn’t closed myself off afterward?
“Wanna play something else?” Matty asks. I nod, handing him the rest of my quarters.
“You pick.”
“Thanks,” he says. “My sisters would never have time for this kind of thing, so this is really fun.” He smiles so sincerely it practically chokes me up. “It’s the most fun I’ve had all summer.”
I ruffle his hair, feeling sorry for the kid, knowing he’s had a hell of a year. Mia is doing everything she can for her family, but Matty’s clearly hurting. Not that I could mention that without upsetting Mia though, and knowing it’s not really my place to say anything anyhow.
No strings, right?
“When do you go back to Colorado?” Matty asks, feeding a pinball machine.
“Three weeks,” I tell him.
“That sucks,” he says in that matter-of-fact way kids have.
“I know, but the job will be over, and my life is there.”
He nods, pulling back the plunger and forcing the metal ball to fly across the playfield.
“You’re lucky,” Matty says, using the flippers to bounce his ball around.
“Oh, yeah?” I ask, watching his ball roll down colorful ramps and past lighted gates. “How so?”
“You have a whole mountain. I don’t even have a yard to play in with my Nerf guns.”
“You’d like that? A yard?”
“Right now,” he says, twisting his lips as his last ball rolls to the drain. “I’m more worried about having a place to live than a place to play.”
A half hour later, we’re out of quarters and so we return to the ladies. They seem to have called a truce of some sort because no one is arguing.
“Having fun?” Mia asks Matty. “We thought we’d lost you.”
“I love this place,” he beams. “Ford’s the best.”
I swallow, knowing Mia isn’t going to like the fact that her brother is getting attached.
And I’m standing here, feeling a little worried for Matty myself.
Truth is, he thinks I’m the best right now because I was spending time with him, uninterrupted. The bar is pretty low.
And even more worrisome, is the fact it’s not just Mia I’m getting attached to. It’s her brother too.
He reminds me of the past. Of what I lost. I’ve been stuck in a holding pattern for years but meeting Matty makes me think that maybe there’s more for me.
It’s the surprise of my fucking life; one I didn’t see coming.
This city may not be home, but damn, the people here have begun to edge their way into my heart.
18
Mia
I know this fling has a ticking clock. I know this is all temporary, but every time Ford looks at me, my heart melts a little bit more.
Ford came into my life at the perfect moment. I was so stressed and overwhelmed and overworked, that I didn’t realize he was the fresh mountain air my heart was craving so damn badly.
Ford somehow, makes me forget all the things I’m worried about. He takes the edge off my fear of my life becoming a free fall. His strong arms and firm touch and surprisingly romantic demeanor softens me in a way that makes all the stress in my life bearable.
He reminds me of everything I love about the city. He keeps showing me restaurants I haven’t heard about and takes me to museums for the first time in years. I keep teasing him that he’s the one falling in love with NYC, but the truth is, I’m falling back in love with it all over again.
Matty is spending lots of time at the YMCA—which is a great outlet for him. I even registered him for a camp that offered a scholarship for him. And Tallie is busy with her internship, and since no prospective jobs are calling me for interviews, I’m choosing to take Ford’s advice and live one day at a time. Of course, I’m still applying to places like crazy. And I’m even getting a little desperate. Last week, I applied for a job as a preschool assistant. Which is great for some people, but I know next to nothing about early childhood development.
Still, I’m not letting any possibility pass me by. Not when Matty and Tallie are counting on me.
And now with school out for the summer, my sister and Matty can help with the laundry, grocery shopping, and cleaning the apartment.
It’s hard to think about, but I wonder if half the stress I felt this last year was self-induced. Of course, losing Mom made everything feel one hundred times harder, but now that I’m feeling less overwhelmed with the routine of getting them off to school each day, for the first time I can see that there might be a light at the end of this tunnel.
Maybe I won’t always have to be a neurotic mess. Maybe I’m still fun. Maybe Mia isn’t totally lost.
And right now, I’m allowing myself to enjoy the summer in the city. God knows real life is hurtling toward me like a subway.
Ford and I share a romantic dinner at a small French cafe that opened three blocks away. It’s tucked down a brick-paved alley, and the entire restaurant is on an outdoor patio where lights are strung between the rafters and wine is served in carafes.
We come home a little tipsy and a lot horny. My hands are all over him the moment we enter his hotel room. He undresses me slowly, and I let my body ope
n to him in a way that only happens after a bottle of wine each.
Naked, in his bed, he kisses me from head to toe. I laugh, covering my face as his beard tickles my pussy, waking me up in the way he knows I love.
“Let me do something just for you,” I tell him, sitting on the edge of the bed. “Where is that lubricant we bought the other day?”
He raises his eyebrows, his interest piqued, and he walks toward the bathroom to grab the bottle, his hard cock making my pussy clench in desire as he returns.
“What did you have in mind?”
“Let’s try something… different.” I lick my lips and then spread my legs, pulling him closer, my hands grabbing his perfect ass.
I open my mouth, letting my tongue swirl around his hard cock, taking him in as far as I can go. His hands are in my hair, guiding me to suck him harder, the way I have learned he likes. I move fast, his veiny shaft so hard and I can taste precum on his tip.
It tastes so good, and it makes my pussy drip with excitement. When I know he is ready, I pull him from me and roll over on my hands and knees, wanting him to take me from behind in a way we haven’t before.
“You sure?” he asks, his warm hands on my ass cheeks, massaging them, a finger running between my legs and feeling how wet and needy I am for him. He leaves a trail of kisses down my back, and my body sinks into the bed, feeling so desired and adored.
“I’m sure,” I tell him. “I want you to be my first.” Deep down I am thinking that I want him to be my only.
I feel him growl with yearning as he presses a lubed finger against my hole. He opens it up, the sensation so new and intoxicating to us both. I clench my jaw together as I allow my body to explode as he presses a second finger inside of me.
The feeling is overwhelming, in an absolutely sensual way. I don’t want him to stop, All I want is more, everything. To give into this surreal moment of bliss.
I exhale against the duvet, my head on its side as I relax my body, allowing it to open to the man I trust so damn much.
“Is this okay, baby?” he asks gently, caressing my ass so tenderly.
I murmur a yes as he begins to ease his hard cock against my ass. I moan my back arching and melting toward him as he begins to fill me, the lubricant helping ease him deeper and deeper.