What Love Sounds Like

by Alissa Callen

  Seth Black would be calling to hear his opinion about a new venture, a new venture Kade hadn’t yet read over. Now he knew Mia and Tilly were okay he should return to work. But instead of turning on his heel, he watched them. An almost tangible companionship cocooned them in their own private world. A world he wasn’t supposed to want to be a member of. But like steel to a magnet, his hand lifted and he opened the conservatory door.

  Mia and Tilly looked up. An instant smile warmed Tilly’s face. But it was Mia’s face Kade couldn’t look away from. For once her smile didn’t slip when she saw him.

  His gut clenched. A welcoming Mia was even more dangerous than any brown snake. He should have headed back to his office. He couldn’t keep allowing his self-control to haemorrhage and his emotions to spill free.

  ‘Come and play cookie dame.’ Tilly waved at him to come closer. He moved forward on leaden feet. It wasn’t only bears he’d learned about this past week. He’d also learned that resisting the combined force of Mia and Tilly would be futile. He nodded toward Mia.

  She nodded in return. ‘You’re timing’s perfect, Kade. You’re just the person we need to finish off our game.’

  He eyed off the oversized glass jar with the word ‘cookies’ stuck to it in glittering silver letters and took a seat beside Tilly. ‘No guesses what you’re doing involves food.’

  ‘You should know by now your niece has hollow legs.’ Amusement threaded Mia’s words.

  Tilly rubbed her tummy.

  He shook his head. ‘Unbelievable.’

  Tilly giggled and pushed a plate of chocolate chip cookies toward him. Mia pushed them away again.

  ‘Before anyone gets any cookies we have to finish our cookie jar game. Tilly can say her ‘k’ words really well and now we’re practising putting them into sentences. Tilly, can you please show your uncle what to do?’

  Tilly picked up a picture card from in the middle of the table and put it in the jar. She raised her hands in a silent question. ‘Who put the kite in the cookie jar?’ she asked slowly but clearly.

  ‘Tilly did,’ Mia answered with a smile. ‘Tilly put the kite in the cookie jar.’ She motioned toward the remaining picture card. ‘Okay, Kade, you’re lucky last.’

  He picked up the card, examined the picture of a kitten and placed the card in the jar. He kept his hands firmly planted on the table. He’d join in their game but there was no way he’d participate in any theatrics. ‘Who put the kitten in the cookie jar?’

  ‘Kade did,’ Tilly said with such glee, he couldn’t help but smile. ‘Kade put the kitten in the cookie jar.’

  ’Lovely ‘k’ talking,’ Mia said and slid the plate of chocolate chip cookies toward Tilly. Tilly took two cookies and passed one to him. He nodded in thanks. ‘Yummy,’ she said before taking a large bite.

  He offered Mia the plate. ‘Thanks,’ she said, ‘but I’ll have one in a minute. I’ll get our next activity ready.’

  He’d be long gone before the next game started. But as quick as he was to polish off his cookie, Tilly was faster. She swallowed her last mouthful and moved her chair closer to him. She grinned as though he hadn’t stiffened, as though he hadn’t looked toward the door checking his exit route was clear. She patted his arm. ‘Don’t worry. Next dame short one.’

  The lingering sweetness of the cookie turned to ashes in his mouth. Tilly’s small hand might rest on his forearm bridging the physical gap between them, but it was her reassurance that brought her world crashing against his. Her concern was touching, humbling. Threatening. It’d been decades since he’d received such personal attention. And even then it’d taken over a week for him to be comfortable having his grandmother hug him.

  Mia slid a pencil and pile of white paper squares over to him. ‘Here, perhaps you could write some ‘k’ words on these?’

  He reached for the paper squares and the pencil as though she’d passed him a life-line. Tilly’s hand slipped off his arm.

  ‘Any ‘k’ word?’

  ‘Yes.’ Mia took the picture cards out of the cookie jar and replaced them with the square pieces of paper. ‘We’re going to make silly sentences with Tilly’s target words as well as some unfamiliar ones. It’s okay if you add ones I already have in there.’

  He set about writing as many ‘k’ words as he could as quickly as possible then added his squares to the cookie jar.

  Mia shook the jar. ‘I’ll pick out three words and make them into a silly sentence.’

  She selected three words and laid them out on the table before her. ‘My silly sentence is…the kangaroo ate the king’s kite.’

  Kade took hold of the jar even before Mia had finished talking and picked out his words. The sooner he played the game, the sooner he could leave. He laid the white squares on the table. ‘My silly sentence is…’ but before he could continue Mia plucked up the first of his words.

  Her fine brows lifted as she read his handwriting. ‘Kudos? I know Tilly is a clever little chicken but even she couldn’t make a sentence with such a word.’ Mia’s laughing eyes met his. ‘What other words did you put in the jar?’

  Of their own volition his lips curved. Mia’s smile never failed to make him want to smile too. ‘Kismet, cardinal…’

  She held up her hand. ‘Stop, you’re giving me a headache.’

  He chuckled. ‘They were the only ones I could think of.’

  Tilly looked from him to Mia and then back again. She grinned. ‘What’s kud–os?’

  ‘Over to you, Kade,’ Mia said.

  ‘Kudos means praise for a job well done.’

  His niece nodded.

  Mia fossicked around in the cookie jar. ‘Kudos to you, Kade, for your extensive vocabulary. Remind me never to agree to play a game of Scrabble with you. But…’ She pulled out the squares with his scrawl on them. ‘I think we’ll just stick to simple silly sentences.’

  He stared at Mia’s face. Light shimmered in the copper strands of her hair that fell loose around her shoulders. Her soft lips were curved in a smile. It didn’t matter how extensive his vocabulary, if he ever played her in Scrabble, he’d lose. It didn’t matter how many days passed since she arrived at Berrilea, her vibrancy and beauty still robbed him of all purpose.

  ‘Have another go, Kade.’

  From the query in her eyes he knew she’d already asked him such a question. He mentally shook himself.

  ‘Okay, here goes.’ He chose three new words and placed them on the table. ‘The cat kicked the key.’

  Tilly clapped.

  ‘Well done,’ Mia said with another smile.

  He looked down at his words. No wonder Tilly was doing so well under Mia’s instruction. Her approval could melt a polar ice-cap. He almost wanted to say another sentence just to have her look at him with such warmth again.

  Grown man. Remember.

  She passed Tilly the cookie jar. ‘Your turn, Possum.’

  Tilly rummaged around in the jar to select her first word. Her tongue appeared at the corner of her mouth as she concentrated. It was as though a million-dollar deal rested upon what word she chose. He glanced at Mia and found her looking at him instead of Tilly. Their gazes held.

  Look. Away. Now.

  Mia focussed on the cookie jar she held and took her time placing it back on the table. Embarrassed heat spiralled through her. So what if laughter had erased the stern lines on Kade’s face? So what if his blue polo shirt intensified the brilliant hue of his eyes? It was no excuse to study him while he watched Tilly or to wonder about the man behind the frown. She was supposed to be staying behind the professional line.

  To her relief Tilly set her three words onto the table.

  ‘Right, let’s hear your silly sentence,’ Mia said.

  ‘Kade,’ Tilly paused. Mia nodded. ‘Kiss.’ Mischief brightened Tilly’s expression. As if in slow motion, Mia saw Tilly’s lips move. But instead of rounding to say ‘k’ her mouth began to close as if she were going to say the ‘m’ sound. Mia’s pulse tripped. M for…Mia
.

  She spoke the first name that came into her head to end Tilly’s silly sentence. ‘Sleeping Beauty. Kade kiss Sleeping Beauty.’

  Tilly frowned.

  Kade glanced between the two of them. ‘I mightn’t have any idea who Sleeping Beauty is but I do know that her name doesn’t start with ‘k’.’

  Mia dredged up a laugh. He appeared oblivious to what name his niece had intended to say but the bright flags of colour that burned her cheeks would soon tell him he’d missed something. She spoke quickly to distract him. ‘You’re not serious? You don’t know the fairytale Sleeping Beauty?’

  He shook his dark head. ‘No, I do know of Cinderella, thanks to a day-dreaming PA who kept losing her shoes, but I haven’t ever heard of Sleeping Beauty.’

  Tilly pushed her chair away from the table and leapt to her feet.

  ‘It’s okay your uncle doesn’t need…’ Mia said but it was too late. Tilly bolted from the room on a mission to retrieve the Sleeping Beauty story book they’d read before bedtime. The sound of her running feet faded.

  Butterflies took flight within Mia’s stomach. She ignored them. There was nothing to be unsettled about sitting alone with Kade in the conservatory. Even if his rare smile did warm her like sunshine breaking through a winter’s sky he was just like any other father or guardian she’d dealt with. Sure, she might not be in the safety of her office. Sure, not one of her clients had ever unnerved her like Kade could, but all in all it was just business as usual.

  ‘Is it too late to tell you that fairytales rank alongside food on Tilly’s favourites list?’ she said.

  ‘I’d never have guessed.’ He smiled a brief smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. The tension that had gripped him when Tilly had moved her chair closer to his side appeared to have returned. His forearms might rest casually upon the oak table but their tanned contours were corded.

  ‘You know that she’ll bring down her whole collection, complete with DVDs?’

  Kade gave a mock groan. ‘Can I make my escape now?’

  ‘Not if you value your life.’

  Again his lips moved in the semblance of a smile, but his eyes remained cautious. Silence enveloped them. Butterflies continued to spread their fragile wings within her stomach. ‘I might just have that cookie now?’

  ‘May as well,’ Kade said and slid the plate across to her.

  She selected a cookie and took a bite. He picked up the pencil in front of him and twirled it between his strong fingers. She took another bite. The pencil twirled faster in his fingers.

  ‘Tilly must be writing the book,’ he said, voice strained.

  ‘She does have all those stairs to climb to her bedroom.’ Mia took hold of her water glass. ‘Perhaps you should go and help her?’

  He shot to his feet. ‘I should.’

  Mia nodded and sipped. She knew it was a mistake even before the water passed her lips. With her attention on Kade’s broad shoulders as he turned, she swallowed too late. Liquid ran down her windpipe. She coughed. Not a small, insignificant, clearing of the throat cough, but a full-on, undignified, seal-bark cough. Somehow she sat her glass on the table and stood. Her hand covered her mouth as she hunched over. Paralytic spasms savaged her.

  She didn’t register Kade’s return until the heat of his hand upon her back seared through the thin cotton of her pink-striped blouse. In between coughs, she waved at him to leave. But he didn’t move away. Instead, he stayed close and held her hair off her hot face. His nearness only intensified her coughing frenzy. Panic set in. She couldn’t think. Couldn’t breathe.

  She closed her eyes and fought for control and sanity. She barked out one last body-jarring cough and her airways cleared. Her hand fell away from her mouth. She slowly straightened.

  Kade’s fingers threaded through her hair as he brushed it off her cheeks. ‘Are you okay?’

  Kade looked at her with such concern she knew a single lucid word wouldn’t leave her lips. His fingers remained tangled in her hair, almost as though he’d forgotten his hands framed her face. She gave in to a last cough and nodded.

  She waited for him to move away. But still he stared at her. Still he touched her. What little air she’d been able to draw into her lungs dissipated.

  She forced clear words to form. ‘At the rate we’ve been going, one of us will need the Heimlich manoeuvre soon.’

  He nodded but still he didn’t release her and still she remained powerless to move. Kade stared at her mouth in a way that unleashed a tide of goose-bumps across her skin. In a way that would make Tilly’s unspoken silly sentence about Kade kissing her come true.

  Tilly.

  The moment shattered. Reality returned. Mia stepped away. Kade’s fingers slid from her hair.

  ‘Tilly will be back any second,’ she managed.

  ‘Yes, she will.’ His abrupt tone barely resembled the worried voice he’d used only minutes earlier.

  She pulled out her chair with a shaking hand and sat at the table. Tilly’s racing feet echoed on the kitchen floorboards. She’d never heard such a welcoming sound. And going off the relief that flashed over his face, Kade hadn’t either.

  Tilly burst into the room, her small arms full. Kade moved to take the teetering pile and plonked the books and DVDs onto the table. Tilly grabbed a story off the top of the stack and opened it. She pointed to the picture of a golden-haired figure and held the page up for her uncle to see. ‘Sleeping Beauty.’

  ‘So, she’s another princess?’ Kade looked at the book but his rigid body remained angled toward the doorway.

  ’Yes.’ Tilly flipped through to a new page. She again lifted the picture for Kade to see. ‘Prince.’

  He nodded. Tilly lowered the book and ran her finger beneath a line of words. Then she started to read. ‘The Prince reached the tower. The Princess lay asleep. She looked so beautiful. He bent down and…’

  ‘How about we stop there?’ Mia interrupted. The spoken and unspoken kiss word had already been said one too many times this morning. ‘We don’t want to spoil the ending for your uncle.’

  Tilly’s brow furrowed, then she nodded. Mia waited for Kade to comment on Tilly’s advanced reading skills. But instead he scowled so hard at the picture of the Prince bending to kiss Sleeping Beauty, Mia could have sworn the noses of the little rabbits in the colourful illustration twitched.

  She left her chair to come to Tilly’s side. She flicked back a few pages in the book. ‘Look there’s some words we don’t have in our ‘k’ cookie jar. Kitchen. Cook. Maybe you could copy them and put them in the jar?’

  ‘Otay.’

  Tilly sat at the table, making sure she didn’t lose her page and reached for the pencil Kade had been twirling in his fingers.

  When she was certain Tilly was engrossed in the task at hand, Mia turned to Kade and spoke in an undertone. ‘Do you have any idea how clever Tilly is?’

  ‘Can’t all children read?’

  ‘No. Not many can sound out words at four.’

  ‘I could.’

  Mia examined his impassive expression. It was as though the laughing, relaxed Kade of earlier had been nothing but an illusion. ‘I’ve no doubt you could. Just as there’s also no doubt you and Tilly share the same DNA. Some people believe intelligence has a genetic component.’

  A muscle flexed in his set jaw. ‘It’s of no consequence what we share, we’re not alike at all.’

  ‘You’re far more alike than you think.’

  ‘Ridiculous.’

  She ground her teeth. No matter how many times she battered against it, the wall between Kade and Tilly held firm. ‘Why is it so hard for you to accept that you and Tilly have a connection that goes well beyond guardian and ward?’

  ‘Sorry to burst your theoretical bubble, but Tilly and I don’t have a connection. We don’t have anything in common except our surnames.’

  He turned toward the door. Her frayed nerves unravelled. Frustration ignited the ragged ends like a spark to a fuse. There was no way sh
e could allow him to retreat into his tower and continue to lock himself away from his niece. ‘No, you don’t.’

  Something in her low voice stopped him. He faced her, his features tight. She stepped toward him. ‘Don’t you dare run away from Tilly again.’

  ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve already explained that our lives are to remain separate.’ His tone was terse.

  ‘You know exactly what I’m talking about and keeping your lives separate has nothing to do with wanting what is best for Tilly and everything to do with you.’

  An indefinable emotion flickered across his face. ‘My plans for my ward have nothing to do with me. I’m just giving her the life my brother would have.’

  ‘Rubbish. The only life you are giving her is one without love.’

  ‘Love?’ Kade’s lips barely moved.

  ‘Yes, love. Tilly needs you, Kade. Please spend time with her. Please stop running away.’

  ‘Upper management do not run away.’

  Tilly glanced at them, her large eyes curious.

  Mia lowered her voice. ‘Then prove it by crossing the bridge between your two worlds.’

  ‘There is no bridge between our worlds.’

  ‘Yes, there is. It isn’t only a quick brain you share with your niece.’

  ‘Surely you’re not suggesting pink is my favourite colour?’

  Mia looked for any amusement in his face but his eyes remained glacier cold.

  ‘No, and neither am I suggesting that you prefer dolls to dividends. What I am saying is that at times intelligence can be a burden not a blessing.’

  ’I wouldn’t know.’

  ‘I think you do. Children who think deeply can also feel deeply. They may also emotionally numb themselves to cope with their feelings.’

  Kade’s mouth firmed. ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about. I cope with my feelings just fine.’

  Had she pushed him too far? She looked at Tilly and her lovable little face as she concentrated on copying a word from her book. Colour had returned to her cheeks as grief had lessened its hold upon her, a hold that would return should Kade continue to shut her out of his life.