Seasons of the Heart

by Susette Williams

  When she went to retrieve her coat, he followed and helped her to put it on. “I take it you’re not talking to me?”

  Sasha’s eyes widened and she left out a frustrated, “Humph.”

  “I guess that means no.”

  Slinging her purse over her shoulder, Sasha stormed off towards the door, then stopped abruptly and turned on him.

  “What do you mean, not talking to you? You’re the one who hasn’t called and then had the nerve to relay a message through my friend instead of calling me and telling me if you still intended to pick me up or not.” Not giving Forrest a chance to respond, Sasha turned back towards the door, intending to head outside. “Really!”

  Forrest grabbed her arm and pulled her around. She laid her palm flat against his jacket, trying to steady herself. For a moment, both stared in stunned silence. Specks of gold radiated from Sasha’s pupils, shimmering amidst brownish-green tranquility.

  “I’m glad you stopped wearing glasses,” Forrest whispered as he leaned closer and lightly pressed his lips against hers. What began as an exploration, deepened into a more intimate kiss.

  Sasha felt herself melting, before she involuntarily stiffened and pushed him away. His eyes widened. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”

  Blushing, Sasha turned away and walked out into the brisk air. She shivered, not from the cold, but from how deeply Forrest had penetrated the icy core around her heart. As much as she wanted to go on with life, she wasn’t ready for the feelings he stirred within her.

  Chapter Seven

  Lord, please help me to be honest with Forrest and help me to ask him for his forgiveness. I’ve been angry with him for not calling and I have no reason to be angry or bitter towards him. He’s done nothing but go out of his way for me, Sasha silently prayed while Forrest said grace over the food the waiter had laid before them.

  Have you forgiven those who have transgressed you?

  Sasha gasped as she recalled the scripture regarding forgiving others so that her heavenly Father could forgive her, too.

  “What’s wrong?” His fork paused in midair, Forrest looked at her with concern.

  “I’m sorry. I was thinking, well, praying actually, about how to ask you for forgiveness.”

  “Forgiveness for what?”

  “For being angry with you. When you didn’t call this week… I got mad at you.”

  “You did?” Forrest smiled and his eyes sparkled.

  Sasha tossed the napkin she had been fidgeting with on the table. “Now why does that amuse you?”

  “Honestly?”

  “Yes, honestly. What do you find so amusing about me being angry with you?”

  “It’s a sign that you’re beginning to care again.”

  Sasha blushed.

  “That’s good.” Forrest laughed, set his fork down and leaned forward, his arms, leaning against the edge of the table. “It’s like we had our first fight.”

  Sasha’s eyes widened and her cheeks felt warm.

  “Hey,” Forrest chuckled. “Don’t worry. I’m sure we’ll have more.” He picked up his fork and knife and began cutting his steak.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t call you. I thought you needed the space. Then at your work, I was sure I blew it for good. I didn’t mean to step out of line like that,” he paused before taking a bite of his food. “The last thing I want to do is rush you.”

  Sasha stared at the food on her plate while she swirled her fork through her mashed potatoes. He knew she liked him. She could feel her cheeks grow warmer and was sure they were a bright red. “I was also thinking about something else.”

  “Would you like some more tea, sir?” the waiter asked, a carafe filled with tea in his hand.

  “Yes, thank you.” Forrest scooted his glass closer to the edge of the table.

  “Would you like anything else?” Their waiter glanced at both of them. When they both shook their heads, he left.

  “You were saying…,” Forrest prompted.

  Sasha frowned. “When I was thinking of forgiveness, it came to mind that I’ve never forgiven Doug for what he did. I’ve been living in a prison ever since it happened, afraid to let anyone near me again. One part of me says I shouldn’t forgive him and then, when I asked God to help you forgive me, all the sudden his face flashed in front of me.”

  Sasha stared at Forrest, hoping he could understand. If it wasn’t for him, she wouldn’t be out now, having dinner with an attractive man who made her heart race, and did things to her icy reserve.

  “I’m not too inclined to want to forgive Doug for what he did to you, either. But if we don’t forgive others, it consumes us. Right now you’re still being victimized by Doug because you haven’t forgiven him, which I’m not sure if I were in your shoes I could do either. But by forgiving him, it will release you from that hold he has on your emotions.”

  “I know I need to forgive, but it’s hard. Every time I see him, my skin crawls and I want to throw up. Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.”

  Forrest laughed and looked down at his plate, then back at her. “It’s okay. I’ve got a strong stomach.”

  Although Sasha was embarrassed, she joined in his laughter. She loved the way his eyes sparkled when he was amused and his smile made her pulse race. He was right, she did like him—a lot!

  “Tell you what, to make amends, I promise I’ll call you every day. Either after you get home from work or if I’m at school, I’ll call you when I get home. No matter how late it is.”

  Sasha smiled. “Okay, and I promise not to get mad at you if you get too busy or forget to call.”

  “I won’t forget.”

  His blue eyes held hers. She knew he was serious, he wouldn’t forget. It filled her with a comfort and security she hadn’t felt in a long time.

  “I’ve been doing a little thinking of my own lately.”

  “Oh?”

  “Yes.” Forrest reached into the pocket of his jacket and retrieved something that he kept clasped in his hand.

  “I thought you should have a ring.” He reached across the table and handed a tiny purple velvet box to her.

  “But,” Sasha began to protest as she opened the box. She drew in a sharp breath. “It’s beautiful, but you shouldn’t have. We’re not really engaged.”

  Her finger traced the small diamonds that encased a larger stone. When she looked up, she thought she saw hurt in Forrest’s eyes, but it was gone so quickly, she wasn’t sure if it had really been there.

  “It’s a lovely ring.” Sasha didn’t know what else to say.

  Forrest shrugged his shoulders. “I thought it might be more convincing. If you didn’t show up with a ring on your finger sometime soon, people might start to ask questions.”

  Sasha didn’t want to admit that they already were. Last week a woman in her math class asked her when she was going to get a ring. She was so flustered, the only thing she could do was shrug her shoulders and tell her, “He’s between jobs right now.” Which was true, at the time.

  “What about work? You just got a job. You can’t afford this.” Sasha closed the box and held it out to him.

  Forrest started to take it, but clasped her hand in his instead. “I can afford it and the peace of mind it will give me knowing that it will keep Doug at a greater distance is well worth the cost.”

  ♥ ♥ ♥

  The thought of Forrest wanting to protect her, no matter what it cost him, had touched Sasha. She couldn’t refuse to wear his ring. A part of her wanted to go around and show all of her friends. The small voice in her head kept reminding her that she wasn’t really engaged.

  Sasha twirled the ring on her finger as she headed home from work on Wednesday. It had been embarrassing enough when Katie noticed the ring and screamed, “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”

  Sasha had pretended that it was too late, she was already in bed by the time Katie had come home from her date with Wade. It wasn’t a lie. She had been in bed, but hadn’t fallen asleep b
ecause she was too excited, daydreaming what it would be like to be married to Forrest. The thought of Forrest coming home from work, sitting across the table from her every night excited her as much as his kiss had.

  After parking her Escort, Sasha reached over to the floorboard near the passenger door where her purse had slid and grabbed it. Climbing out of the car, she didn’t even bother to bundle her coat for the short distance to the house. She didn’t even have a chance to turn her key in the lock before the door was yanked open.

  “Surprise.” Katie stood with her arm extended towards the couch where a very unhappy looking Jordan was getting to a standing position.

  “Jordan, you’re here. Why?” Sasha asked, feeling faint.

  “I hear congratulations are in order. So who is this guy?” Jordan stood with his shoulders squared, brown eyes set as stern as a mighty redwood. No, hello, how are you, direct and to the point, the overly protective big brother.

  “Why don’t we go somewhere and talk,” Sasha suggested.

  “I was just getting ready to head over to Wade’s. We’re going over invitations tonight.” Katie slipped her coat on, then reached around her neck and lifted her hair out from under her jacket. “We’ve got church later this evening. If we don’t finish, we may go back to his place and try and get as much done as we can. Our wedding is less than two months away. I’ll see you later,” Katie told Sasha, then turned to Jordan, “It was nice meeting you.”

  “Same here,” Jordan answered, never taking his eyes off of Sasha.

  No sooner had the door closed behind Katie, Jordan asked, “This is kind of sudden isn’t it?”

  “Well, not really. He just gave me the ring this weekend, but we’ve been ah … engaged for a couple weeks.” Sasha wanted to tell Jordan the truth, but if she did, he’d want to know why and if she told him that—she’d have to tell him about what happened with Doug and she couldn’t do that.

  “Are you pregnant?”

  Sasha’s mouth gaped open as a warmth flooded her face. “How dare you,” she sputtered.

  “Don’t look at me like that. It’s a natural assumption.”

  Sasha closed her gaping mouth.

  “You talked to us less than two weeks ago and never mentioned a word about this guy. Not even that you were dating anyone.” Jordan placed his hands on his hips, giving her an accusing stare. “What do you want me to think?”

  “I don’t care what you think.” Sasha threw her coat on the chair near the door and tromped into the kitchen to get a drink and regain her composure.

  “We’re family, don’t you think Mom and I have a right to know? Or were you planning on eloping and not even inviting us to the wedding?”

  Sasha chose her words carefully, “When we get married, you’ll definitely be invited.”

  She didn’t want to add ‘if’. Taking a different tactic, she changed the subject. “Why don’t we go out for dinner?”

  Jordan shrugged his indifference.

  Draining the last sip of her tea, Sasha put the glass in the sink, then leaned against the counter. “How long are you planning on staying?”

  “You’re not trying to get rid of me, are you?

  Sasha laughed. It was a thought. “No, I was just curious. Don’t you have to work?”

  “I took a week’s vacation. It’s our slow time anyway. Plus, I don’t plan on leaving until I meet this boyfriend of yours.”

  That’s what worried her. The two were bound to get along like sumo wrestlers on eggshells and she felt like hers was the shell that was about to be cracked.

  Jordan followed her into the living room. While she slipped on her wool coat, he donned his leather jacket. For a guy around thirty, he wasn’t bad looking, even being tall and lanky. “Why haven’t you ever married?”

  “Me?” Jordan looked like someone had just asked him to sing a solo in front of church. “Too many girls and not enough time.”

  Sasha gave a contemptuous laugh. “So you’d feel better if I dated every man around?”

  She turned and walked outside without waiting for an answer.

  “Now hold on, you know that’s not what I meant.” Jordan walked towards his car across the street while Sasha headed to hers.

  She hadn’t noticed the black Mustang when she pulled up. Of course, she wasn’t looking for it either. “I thought we’d take my car since I know my way around.”

  Jordan frowned and hurried back across the street to her Escort. Sasha climbed in and reached across to unlock the door for him. “It feels funny having you drive. I think the last time I rode with you anywhere was when you first got your license.”

  Sasha smiled as she remembered his old blue pickup truck.

  “And come to think of it, the last time was when you pulled out in front of that guy on Broadway and smashed the front end of my truck.”

  “That was a long time ago and if you don’t stop distracting me while we’re driving, you might get a repeat performance,” Sasha threatened.

  “At least this time it’s not my car.”

  “Humph.” Sasha frowned and kept her eyes on the road.

  ♥ ♥ ♥

  Sasha and Jordan were having such a good time talking, neither of them had paid attention to the time, electing to go play games at the arcade like they had back home when they were kids.

  The moment Sasha pulled up behind Forrest’s truck, he was out of it and heading towards her car door.

  “Where have you—,” he broke off mid sentence when he realized she wasn’t alone. “What’s the meaning of this?”

  By the light of the moon she could see his steely eyes. “Oh, my. I’m sorry. I didn’t think about calling you later when we went out.”

  “And who would ‘we’ happen to be?” Forrest said between clenched teeth.

  Jordan may have been taller, but Forrest had a more defined build. Sasha couldn’t believe Jordan was daring to take a defensive stance with Forrest. “I’m her brother. I take it you’re the supposed boyfriend.”

  “Fiancé,” Forrest corrected, relaxing as he extended his hand.

  Jordan hesitated before taking it. “I’m Jordan.”

  “Forrest Tucker. Glad to finally get a chance to meet one of my future in-laws."

  “Why don’t we go inside and get out of the cold. I’m freezing,” Sasha suggested, her teeth beginning to chatter.

  Both men reached for one of her arms to guide her then stopped. Forrest didn’t release his hold. Sasha felt like she was in the middle of a Mexican standoff. Finally Jordan relented and motioned for them to proceed him. “After you.”

  Inside, Forrest helped Sasha take off her coat. While she hung it up, he took his off and laid it in the chair on top of Jordan’s.

  “Why don’t you two have a seat in the kitchen while I fix some hot chocolate.” Sasha didn’t dare leave them alone. No telling what they would talk about. Until she had a chance to talk to Forrest first, she didn’t want him revealing anything accidentally.

  Wood scraped across the floor as Jordan pulled his chair out. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw Forrest give him a slightly annoyed look as he quietly took a seat in his chair.

  “So, this marriage thing was pretty sudden. You’re not an illegal alien or anything trying to stay in our country are you?” Jordan laughed, but Sasha knew he was pressing Forrest for the real answer.

  “I’m an American, little brother. Born and raised.”

  “I’m her older brother,” Jordan readily corrected.

  “True.” Forrest smiled. “But you’re younger than I am.”

  Sasha turned her head so they wouldn’t see her chuckle. Jordan had definitely met his match and by the looks of it, he wasn’t too happy.

  “So, tell me, old man, why are you and my sister rushing to get hitched?”

  Forrest chuckled. “Touché. Your sister and I aren’t rushing to get married. We haven’t set any dates.”

  “So you’re stringing her along, then?” Jordan asked in a condescending tone, hi
s eyes squinted, accusing.

  Forrest pounded his fists on the kitchen table. “You’re pushing it, little brother. I may be guilty of putting a ring on her finger quickly, but that’s to make sure everybody knows she’s mine.”

  Sasha nearly dropped her cup when his fists hit the table, but the rest of her body wanted to collapse when he claimed he was staking his claim on her. If only…

  Chapter Eight

  Sasha said goodbye to the future Mr. and Mrs. Ellis, her final customers for the day, and glanced at her watch. Five minutes till four. After Wednesday night, she wouldn’t forget to let Forrest know she would be late again.

  She locked the door and went to the back office to place her call so she could put away the samples and run the vacuum over the floor. Cradling the phone on her shoulder, she listened to the incessant busy signal that vibrated in her ear. Hanging up, she dialed her home number.

  “Hello.”

  “I guess Katie isn’t home yet if you’re answering the phone?”

  “What, no hi, how’s it going? Glad to talk to you, too,” Jordan commented dryly.

  “Funny.” Sasha sighed in frustration. She was tired and didn’t feel up to joking around with her brother. “I was going to ask her to give Forrest a message if he called.”

  Jordan laughed. “What, don’t you trust me to give it to him?”

  “Of course I trust you.” She wasn’t sure how much, but she did. After the way the two hit it off, she was careful to keep them apart. If Forrest knew what accusations Jordan made… She didn’t even want to witness what his reaction would be and hoped her brother had enough sense to never push him that far. In her heart, she knew Jordan was only being protective, but sometimes he could push his limits.

  “What do you want me to tell the old guy?”

  “He’s not old and I wish you would quit ribbing him.” Sasha slammed the sample catalogue down with more force than she had intended.

  “Whoa, little sis. Sorry. You must be serious about this guy. I think it’s the first time you’ve ever stood up for any of the guys you’ve gone out with. You didn’t even complain when I interrogated that jock you went out with, what’s-his-name.”