Cross Your Heart (An Emerson Novel Book 2)
Page 19
Overwhelmed, she said, "Yes, it's fine." She just wanted the madness to stop. She hugged her mother goodbye and watched as her mother hugged Zoe. "Zoe, go get your stuff together."
Walking her parents to the front door, her father turned in the entryway and said, "Red, we love ya. And, we want you to be with whomever makes you happy." Then, he kissed her on the forehead. Looking into her eyes, he said, "But, whoever it is better have plenty of stories to keep your mother entertained." He winked at her and headed outside to open the car door for his bride.
Waiting on Zoe to reappear, Mallory leaned against her loveseat and tapped her front tooth. She wondered who was that thin, balding man and how did he get stuck with Barb.
Chapter 15
Jacqueline awoke early enough that she thought that she might meet Elet for breakfast. She dressed quickly and headed downstairs. She looked around the breakfast area. She did not see him. She went to the sundries store to see if he might be there. He was not. She had failed to get his room number or she would have stopped by his room. Thinking that maybe he had overslept, she sent him a text. He did not respond. She began to wonder if he had spent the night with Megan, but she discarded that thought quickly. Deciding that he was either asleep or showering, she decided to collect some breakfast items from the buffet for him, return to her room, checkout, and wait for him at the truck.
After thirty minutes, all of that was complete. With her bags on her shoulder, she strode out of the hotel into the crisp morning air and headed towards the truck with pasties, coffee, sausage, toast, and a muffin. Much to her surprise, he was there.
"Good morning," she said.
"Hey."
"I tried to catch up with you for breakfast. Did you get anything?"
"Wasn't hungry."
"Well, I got you some stuff in case you were hungry."
"Thanks," he said as he took it from her open hands.
"Still tired?"
"Not really."
"Okay. Well, do you want me to take the first leg? You're definitely better than me at making up time."
"Sure," and he jumped into the passenger's side.
Thinking that he may have had a long night, she didn't say anything more. She eased the truck out of the parking lot and aimed back towards the interstate. She looked over at him and he had already curled up. This morning, the truck felt less cumbersome than it had yesterday. She was less apprehensive about how to handle it and felt more in command of its power and unexpected speed. Leaving the state roads behind, she was in complete command when she re-entered Interstate 95 north. She was passing slow traffic and making great time as she headed to Fayetteville. Since Elet was such a heavy sleeper, she was able to search the radio for songs she knew.
She was singing along when her phone rang. It was Mallory.
"Hey, honey."
"Hi, there. Sounds like you're having fun."
"I'm keeping myself awake."
"Elet asleep? He sleeps more than a newborn."
"Yeah, he does. So, you're heading off to have lunch with Alex?"
"Yes, Olive and I."
"No Paige?"
"She's got a meeting. It's just the three of us."
"Sorry that I'm missing that," Jacqueline said.
"Somehow, I don't think you are. But, anyhow, I wish you were heading home."
"Yeah, me too. I miss you, you know."
"I miss you, too. That bed's lonely without you in it."
"But, I bet you enjoyed being in the bathroom for hours without me interrupting you." She heard her laugh. "I miss that laugh."
"I've gotta get out of here and get back before the boss notices that I'm gone."
"You better. I hear she's a real slave driver."
"I love you."
"I love you, too. I'll talk to you later."
"Okay, baby." Mallory said as she hung up. Jacqueline smiled and placed the phone back in the cup holder.
With his back still to her, Elet spoke, "I don't even understand how you can talk when you're full of so much shit."
Shock came over Jacqueline. She wasn't sure if he was talking to her or talking in his sleep or talking about some text he received. All she could say was, "Elet?"
"I can't believe you. I really can't." He lifted his chair forward and turned to face her. His eyes were filled with rage.
"What are you talkin' about?"
Shaking his head with his arms crossed, he said, "It's all lies. All of it. And, she doesn't even know it."
"What's all lies?"
"All this love that you say that you have for her. It's all bullshit. Remember, I know the truth."
"I do love her. I wasn't lying."
"How can you love her and do what you did last night?"
"Man, that was crazy shit, wasn't it?" She started to laugh at thoughts of last night. "Oh, my God. I never saw any of that coming. Was Megan as crazy as Samantha was?"
"You're my best friend. We've been through all kinds of shit together. But, I can't do this with you right now. Now, right here. Not right now."
Finally realizing what he thought happened, she looked at him, "Wait, you think that I...and Samantha...Sam. Me and her?" He stared at her. "Hell, no. Absolutely not." He did not look as though he believed her. "Lemme tell you what happened. You left the table after the photo incident. Then, she said she wanted to get some...you know, underwear and flip flops and follow you two down the beach. So, I stumble back to her room and wait on her to get her shit. And, I'm staring at this tiny ass room when she comes out butt ass naked. I mean, I was on my way to drunk, but that sobered me up quick. I told her that it wasn't like that and apologized if she misunderstood and got out of there. I went back to my room and called Mallory." He did not look convinced. She said, "I swear. Look at my call log. Look!" She held it up to his face.
He glanced at it. "But, how'd you let yourself get into that situation?"
"How the hell was I supposed to know that things were gonna go like that? I thought they were gonna have a few drinks, eat a few wings, and everyone would have gone back to their rooms."
"Girls like that aren't interested in conversation and you know it," Elet lashed out.
"But, I swear that's all that I was interested in."
"Bullshit! You went in her room in the middle of the night knowing you had a girl back at home. This is the shit that pisses me off. You think that, because you don't say that you want more that you aren't wrong. This is the shit that you do! This is the shit that Alex does! I finally saw the shit that happens with my own eyes. You guys, go and hang out. You know that these guys and girls aren't interested in conversation and friendship. But, you think that it's all okay as long as that's all you say that you want. It's fucked up! It's fucked up for me! It's fucked up to Mallory! And, she doesn't even know that the shit's happening! It's fucked up to Megan and to Samantha who think that you want what they want. And, I never thought you were doing it." She stared at him. He was pounding on the dashboard. It had started to rain outside and the reflection of the rain on his face looked like angry tears. "We put ourselves on the line. I tell her that I love her, but I can't trust her to go to the fucking grocery store and not cheat on me! Fucking Mallory's sitting around waiting on you and your ass is out here flirting with some young kid! That damn girl was ready to sleep with you. She invited you to her room and you fucked with her head and walked out on her!" He was seething.
"Hang on, Elet. Hang on. We didn't pick up any girls. We left them at the bar to go eat on the patio. They followed us."
"Tell me you weren't flirting with them."
"I wasn't. I was just talking to them. They joined us."
"And the picture?"
"How the hell did I know that was going to happen? I passed you my phone. Megan was over your shoulder looking at it. She passed it to Sam. I had no idea she wasn't wearing panties or that she was going to use my phone to take a picture. No idea. We were both stunned. Now, you're right. I should not have gone to her room. But, s
he never made a move like she was going to seduce me. There was no handholding or whispering or seduction. Nothing. She said walk with me while I get some underwear and some flip flops. There's nothing sexy about that. And, when shit got real, I excused myself. I never touched her. I may have misled her and I may have hurt her feelings, but come on, nothing happened," Jacqueline declared.
"That's just what I mean. You put yourself in that situation and you don't even know it's wrong," Elet fumed.
"I did and I get what you're saying. That was a mistake. But, you can't believe that that shit happens to me every day anymore. Those days are long gone," trying to control her temper, Jacqueline said.
"I don't know. I just don't know. Last night, I felt like I was hovering over the moments right up to Alex's bad ideas. And, all I felt was anger that you had deceived me, too."
"Me?"
"Yes, I had always hoped with you there that I knew things were never too out of hand. That she may flirt or whatever, but you made sure that it was never too far gone."
"It never is. She may flirt. She may get a free drink or appetizer. She may have someone try to come to the table to talk, but he usually leaves in shame. Is it nice to those men? No. Is it good for you? Yes." That was the lie she had to tell, so that it would preface the newest truth. "But, all of that is ancient history. I've never seen her more focused on the wedding and your life together. Last night, we sat on the deck with two women while they went looking for bridesmaids’ dresses. They've picked colors and clothes for us."
"Yeah, I know. She called me last night with the news."
"See?" She was trying to bring him back.
"It doesn't matter."
"What doesn't matter?"
"Yesterday. What about all the years? All the times? All the phone numbers who tried to call her? What about all the women who are still sending you fucking naked pictures? Why don't you two realize that we're worth more? Why should anyone put up with your fucking bullshit?" He was slamming his hands against the dash. She was staring at him. He did not hear any of her words and she did not pay attention to the road. They were heading over the Roanoke River. The interstate was less of a hundred feet past over the arms of the river. There were strips of wooded land to their right. Even on a sunny day, it would have been important to keep their eyes on the road, but on a cloudy, rainy day, it was all the more important. Neither of them saw that stray. Neither of them saw the road that was parallel to the highway, it was probably from where he came. But, when they felt the thud, they both had the same pang in their stomachs. The pang of fear and guilt that a person gets right after something that could've been avoided wasn't.
He stopped yelling. She stopped looking at him. They knew they had hit something. Each was looking at all the windows to see what it was. The tires weren't flat. The truck was still operational. They couldn't see anything outside, but without discussion, Jacqueline steered off the road. There was no one behind them. No one traveling on the other side. They were alone on the highway just south of the Virginia state line. They emerged from the truck. Jacqueline headed to the front and Elet headed to the back. It was not necessary to inspect the truck. It was fine. It hadn't suffered in damage, but a few yards back on the side of the road, they saw a heap and heard a moan they'd never heard before. He looked at her as she looked at him, then they raced towards the sound.
"Oh, my God. Oh, my God,” he said as he saw the animal lying near the shoulder. Jacqueline stood over him as he took off his shirt and tried to apply pressure to the bleeding. As he pressed in one spot, the brown dog bled more. It's breathing was erratic and faint. Elet tried to straighten the animals bent torso. It moaned more.
Jacqueline screamed, "Stop, Elet. You're making it worse."
"I don't know what to do," as he continued to pull and tug on the dog's mangled frame.
"Elet, stop! Stop pulling on him! Don't you hear him?" she screamed.
"Jacqueline, we have to do something. We can't let him die."
"What are we going to do?"
"I don't know, but stop yelling at me and help me."
She bent down. She wasn't sure what his breed was. He was brown, medium sized. He had shaggy hair like a Collie her mom had when she was little, but his face looked more like a Lab. She could tell that his hind legs were broken, and there was something wrong with his back. His breathing was less steady and it appeared to cause him pain. He grumbled with each inhale. Elet pulled the dog close to his chest and rocked back and forth. She stroked his head and stared into his half-closed black eyes. As Elet rocked on his knees, his eyes were closed. She wondered if he was praying. Praying for the dog. Praying for her. Praying for himself. She wondered if he was praying to make the dog better, praying that it might get up, and return from where it came. She knew that that was not going to be the case. As the dog's breathing slowed even more and the blood poured from its mouth, she went back to the truck. From the backseat, she gathered Elet's pillow and blanket. From the glove box, she withdrew her holster. As she approached Elet, her prayers for strength had been answered. She knew she had to be strong for the animal and for Elet. She walked up behind Elet and, calmly, said, "He's suffering. We can't let it end this way."
With tears in his eyes, he was choking on his words when he said, "We caused this."
"I know, Elet. I know. And, now, we have to fix it. There's no one else."
"It's not right."
"Tell me the other options! He won't make it to a vet. Hell, we don't know where one is." She waved her arms in the air. "This is our fault. I know we caused it. I know we will have to live with it. But, all we can do now is try to not let him suffer. Look at him! He's suffering. Elet, we have to let him go. We have to give him some peace." His face was red with anguish and his chest and pants red with the dog's blood. But, he nodded. He knew what she said had been true. "You don't have to stand here and watch. You can go to the truck." He shook his head. He held the dog against his chest. She placed the blanket around it. Slowly, Elet stood with the dog in his arms. As he hoisted the animal up, she tucked the blanket around the dog.
Then, the two headed away from the interstate. They trudged along the muddy shoulder. Past fresh cut grass and low cut shrubs, Elet pressed towards the trees. The dog's snout stuck from under the gray blanket. She watched as he sniffed. His black nose wrinkling at the smell from the changing landscape. Elet was heading far from the interstate, but before reaching the local road behind the trees, they stopped walking. With rain pouring on their heads and tears pouring down their faces, they faced each other. Standing still staring into each other eyes, she nodded. He nodded in agreement. He placed the animal on the ground. It howled as its body rested against the cold, wet ground. Elet swallowed hard and covered it completely with the blanket. Its breaths were even fainter and more sporadic. Jacqueline walked over to the dog, crouched down, and placed the pillow over its head. He stopped her. He placed his hands on her hands. When she looked up at him expecting him to speak, she saw that his eyes were closed. She closed hers as well. They did not speak, but there on the shoulder of Interstate 95, each asked for forgiveness and prayed that this animal be spared. When he removed his hand, she opened her eyes. The rustling of the leaves let her know that he had stepped away from her. There was nothing to be said.
In the space of three long, deep breaths and pull of the trigger, it was over. The moaning stopped. The breaths went still. There was silence. They stood in the darkness for a while. Soaked, drained, bloody, they loomed silently staring up through the trees hoping the rain would wash away their sorrow and purge them of their sin. Then, Elet dropped to one knee next to the gray blanket. He placed his hand on the pillow and said, "We're sorry, fella. We're so sorry," in a near whisper.
Jacqueline placed her hand on his shoulder and said, "There wasn't anything else we could do."
He replied with, "Yup." Then, she watched him rise. He walked backwards for a few steps staring at the blanket, staring at the mound, staring at the anima
l. She had watched him while facing the road. She hadn't wanted to look back. When he, eventually, turned, the two walked side by side towards the light. With heads hung low, they trudged through the mud and silt. They climbed up the embankment that they didn't realize that they'd climbed down. They returned to the waiting truck. She returned the holster to the glove box and rose into the passenger's seat. He climbed behind the wheel. And, for some time, there they sat, without saying a word, without moving, with tears streaming down their faces.
~~~~~~~~
As though time had stopped and restarted, traffic appeared on the interstate. The presence of other people jolted them back. Elet cranked the truck and headed north. In silence, he drove along the highway. He did not look in her direction and she did not look in his. They traveled along for miles saying nothing, listening to nothing, absorbed by their pain.
When he saw the sign for a truck stop, he did not ask if she wanted to stop. Instead, he pulled in a parking space and slid out of the truck as if he was depleted of strength. Once on his feet, he opened the back doors and located another shirt in his duffel bag. Closing the doors, he opened the hatch and began to pump gas. Without being asked, Jacqueline cleaned the blood from the bumper. Staring at her bloody hands, she dunked them in the windshield cleaner receptacle. Then, she spoke for the first time in over an hour, "Want something from inside?"
"Let's go grab a bite at the counter."
"Okay," she said. She climbed back into the truck, so they could drive it over to the truck stop counter.
In silence, they picked over burgers and fries. Neither of them ate or spoke. When they had played with their meals for long enough, Jacqueline left a twenty on the table and the two return to the truck. Once again, they headed north.
Chapter 16
Mallory met Olive on the corner across the street from Alex's office building. Prior to arriving, Mallory worried that she wouldn't be able to find Olive in the lunch crowd that had exited the plethora of offices to go in search of food. She was wrong. Standing on the corner with her hand in front of her eyes, she saw Olive approach from a nearby parking garage. She was wearing dark, skinny jeans, a blue plaid shirt that was tied at the bottom, and red sneakers. She smiled to herself. She wasn't embarrassed by the outfit. In fact, she thought how things could have been worse.